Yer invited. All y'all... to this wonderful, glorious cosmos filled with billions upon billions of fruit for all kinds of ponies to sink their purdy lil' teeth into. And not just any fruit, ya reckon? But somethin' that fills our tummies and makes our horse hearts soar to the stars.
Howdy. I'm Professor Applejack. And this is the History of the Apple.
Vector by luckreza8
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Oh this is gonna be a good story.
Oh god, this will end well...
Crack!Fic?
Crack!Apple
florida man writes pony story
Y'all right there, Glimmy?
8376552
Yes it will.
Dear Professor Applejack,
How to use apples to see far-off planets?
This is going to be like the metatextual story with the weirdly formatted text with oomlats isn't it? Everyone's psychoses laid bare, but with Vaporwave.
upgoat
i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/facebook/000/476/519/a8b.jpg
8376680
puts on old preacher outfit
the apple works in mysterious ways.
Are you ok skirts? However fantastic this is, I am slightly concerned for your health.
Whoa. Trippy, mang.
derpicdn.net/img/view/2017/6/3/1453427__safe_artist-colon-greyscaleart_applejack_twilight+sparkle_twilight+sparkle+%28alicorn%29_alicorn_comic_dialogue_duo_earth+pony_floppy+ears_pon.png
Insert obligatory "Skirts wat." here.
This is a juggernaut of crackfic.
8376680
How have apples help ponykind in the way of Science? What fantastical discoveries were made because of the apple?
We must know.
This is it.
Take all my reads and a like. Goddamn.
Have ancient alien apples vised us in the past?
and did they do experiments to produce apple pony hybrids
miss professor apple jack are you and alien apple hybrid???
i.imgur.com/jN57tGt.png
8376795
Hey, who needs therapy when you can write shit like this, eh?
And here we have Rarity dominating the hell out of Rainbow Dash.
...how much did Fourths pay you for this? I'll pay you more.
Dear Professor Applejack,
what do Apples do in their free time? What do they do for entertainment?
And how do they reproduce?
Had no idea what to think of this until I saw:
Now I know exactly what kind of story this is gonna be
How does that even fit with everything
Edit: Typo has gone to the great apple in the sky.
This story offends all my sensibilities. This is generally a good thing. Thank you.
No don't
Goddamnit Fourths!
GODDAMNIT SKIRTS!
Oh goodness.
How many famous apples were there in the film industry?
I spent far too long staring at the .gif at the end while listening to the music.
Dear Professor Jack
How apples could a dashery dash if an apple could dash dashery?
What apple-centric belief systems have ponies held throughout history?
Dear Professor Applejack,
What sort of industrial 'applecations' are there for apples?
Carl Sagan sees what you did there.
While screenplays might be arguably against the rules, how could I not upvote this apple? It deserves every apple I have, after all, Apple. Apple apple and then apple. Apple apple apple. Apple. Apple!
~Tailsoapples
Skirts, don't get me wrong, i love almost everything you've written. It's just, sometimes I get the impression that you just put on a blindfold, drop a shit-ton of acid, and slam your hands into the keyboard until it wears off while somehow magically still producing readable words...
8376660
The term, good sir, is upboat.
In addition, it is spelled umlaut.
Cheerio.
Apples. Write that down in your copybook now.
"Professor" Applejack's "science" is shaky at best...
...
....
....
"...and feces!"
Something tells me that Twilight is gonna give Applejack a lecture after this is done...
...
...
..feces
Just reading that title, I don't know why but-
There was a moment of clarity
Of wisdom
And what I could've sworn was an aneurysm but I can't quite recall the last few minutes
I'll give this a look
This is the new meta.