Yes!

Cloudy rides again!

I've had the privilege of reading some 80-100k of this fic so far. It is adventure on an epic scale. I remember in 2011 when we had several long adventure fics that were the center of the fandom's attention. This fic is like those. It's world building on a large scale. It's history. It's shipping. There's action and tension. It's pretty much everything you could ask for in a fic. Is it worth reading the estimated 170-200k? Hell yes.

Looks interesting I will have to add this to my read later

Uh...wow.  20k words straight out of the starting gate.  Thats a way to start for sure.

1. Awesome

2. Fic starts off with 5 chapters totalling 20k words. (2 prologues? )

Image: http://mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw3082-13279593542672.png

Damn,it's 2:30am and while I normally go to bed at 4~5, I have to return to at least going to bed at 1 if I want to get anywhere in school, so I'll simply put this in 'read later' for now.

This has "epic" written all over it.

Oh crap, a Cloudy Skies story? MUST FOLLOW

Starting with 5 chapters.

Image: http://i.imgur.com/m3rLR.gif

A Cloudy Skies shipventure?

I think I broke the tracking button.

Kits basically nailed it with his comment up there. It's been quite a while since I've had the pleasure of reading a long adventure fic, and Cloudy settles right into filling that niche with Lost and Found. It's been a wonderful read so far and the only reason I haven't read more of it is because I'm a screw up when it comes to time management. This story's worth the read just for the worldbuilding alone, which Cloudy executes on a consistently high level. Can't wait to see where it goes.

I think I must have favorite'd and unfavorite'd this story a hundred times based on how many times I clicked the favorite button.

Silver: Sir, we are taking back Karalia.

Me: Good.

Silver: The reinforcements we landed on Volna Beach have reported heavy fighting along the coastline. 80% of Karalia is under our control again and it won't be long til we can retake our capital.

Me: Things are going TOO well. What's the bad news?

Silver: It appears that a huge force of Cloudy Skies' rebels have been spotted advancing toward our position from the jungles.

Me: How big?

Silver: Trust me sir, you DON'T wanna know!

Me: No matter! Deploy our new Cobalt, Magnet, and Katana Battalions... and send the Dragon Busters with them while keeping the Skilla unit in reserve!

The former Cloudy Skies' citizens that flocked to our army will be VERY useful to us. Send them out. I wanna see how loyal they really are.

Silver: Roger!

I'll be back to read this one later Cloudy but I'm a little occupied at the moment.

Silver out!

Well, I'm excited for this.

Instant-Track and I'll get around to reading it very soon. I must say I'm fairly excited about this, I have no idea why, but the description sort of gives me a bit of an "Off the Edge of the Map" vibe. It could be that I reread that recently, and the FlutterDash just set off those triggers, but all the talk of mass-scale world building and whatnot sort of puts it in my mind. Not that this is at all a bad thing, mind you, also not trying to compare your work to something rather old and great, and creating unfair expectations, I just... don't know, I just woke up, me brain no function today. Bleh.

Anyway, I'll just say preemptively that I've always found the Mane 6 x Royalty ships to be sort of tragic. The fact of being immortal (or, a VERY long life span), and watching all of your loved ones die seems very depressing to me. Even if you offer your lover a way out to become immortal with you, they have to share your heart ache of having to see all of your friends, family and loved ones die around you while you live on, it seems sort of depressing to me. That all said, I have no idea how you plan to tackle their relationship, so it'll definitely be something worth finding out.

>>11542701154270

Have you read Forever is Forever?

also

aaaaaaaaaa

I love it so far. Exciting!

You released!  \o/

Aw, it's not complete. still! X3

Epic adventure is epic.

Uh oh.

Twilight, what did you do?

>>11520471152047 You're being far too kind, but thank you; I wonder if I'll be releasing yet another adventure fic next fall. Odd sort of habit, this!

>>11520541152054 >>11520881152088 >>11523591152359 I hope it's not intimidating. I debated with myself (and others) long and hard over how much to kick off with, but the simple truth is, unless I want to spend more than two months publishing this, I gotta get them words out!

>>11528181152818 Thank you for kind words (and for your help!) - we'll see! If it holds your interest, I would love your thoughts, of course.

>>11542701154270 OtE is definitively (and has always been) one of my main inspirations, so I'm going to take that as potential praise.

You have a point regarding the princesses and such, but my main counterargument is that FiM has never been about death and about the long term consequences; it's not about looking for the shadow side of things when something's nice. I'm not saying ignoring consequences is always a boon, but I've never liked to focus on overinterpreting such things until something lovely becomes tragic.

I'm of course not going to discuss/spoil specifics of this story with regards to this (I'm still writing it, even!), I just mean that generally, I don't let myself be concerned with sad stuff. I tend to favor ignoring or trivializing. The fic Kits linked is a good example of what you can do if you want to frame everything ridiculously tragic, and it's everything I don't want in a fic, be it writing or reading. No offense to the fic or its writer, but it's diametrically opposed to my preferences.

>>11555011155501 A small (ridiculously long) ways off yet, sorry!

>>11550191155019 Thank you very much!

>>11557091155709 Definitely not, I actually enjoyed the continuous read.

>>11557091155709

I re-read Fo:E for fun, its hard to find an intimidating word count for me.

>>11557141155714

Never apologize when you can... write your flank off! Rhymes off, but gogogooggo XD

This has potential.

>>11548701154870 I have now, and it's kind of a bittersweet feeling that TwiDash was added in, considering the cost.

>>11557091155709 That's fine, but it's something that I tend to over-analyze because I want to avoid the potential for a tragedy. My feelings to those sort of ships were probably formed after I read the fic Our Last Goodbye (a story which I gave a chance on a whim, and interestingly enough, has been the only actual fanfic that legitimately made me cry).

It's completely a preference thing, and I will always like fluffy little ship stories between ponies and princesses, but my enjoyment seems to always be tinged with that tragic sadness that seems to be associated with the curse of immortality.  

*Steel shields his eyes, his computer monitor shining quite a bit brighter than usual.*

Bloody hell, being in this comments section is like being in a church, and the Author is their God...

"Can something like this really happen?"

I guess so...I didn't kick up the brightness on my monitor recently, at least.

"Well, since we're hunting around for stories, how about this one?"

I think if we open up the first chapter, we'll go blind from the sheer volume of praise this story's getting.

"It's not like he writes using white text!"

Only one way to find that bit out.

>>11569801156980 Oh, I understand and respect that, truly; all I can say for sure is that tragedy is something you will never find intentionally implied in any story I write. There's a profound lack of Sad or Tragedy tags for a reason, but if you autocomplete TwiLestia thus, I understand why it gives you pause. I'm sorry to hear that :|

>>11569801156980

Have you read Within and Without?  It's a TwiLuna, a damn good one at that, and if you read it you'll get a decent taste for how Cloudy handles the princess pairings.  Now I don't now that's how it'll go down here, probably not, but it's something.

Besides, it's a great fic that, if you haven't read it yet, I recommend you do so with all the haste you can possibly acquire

---

As for the story, I am hooked and already enthralled.  The concept is interesting, the new setting is interesting, and the mysterious hidden history is interesting.  This story is pretty interesting.

I rather like your take on Fluttershy.  I'll be honest, I normally dislike her in most stories due to her perpetual shyness and all around timidity.  The bold, do what must be done stance--still retaining her trademark idiosyncrasies--is a refreshing take on her.  The mysterious letter is very alluring, too.  I want to say that it does have to do with her parents not being able to make the marriage, but at the same time it's for a reason that may not be all bright and dandy.  She basically spoke a half truth, hiding the segments that deal the damage.  

What does puzzle me is why Fluttershy went to Applejack and not Rainbow.  They've been friends for a longer period of time, Fluttershy obviously likes her and has even told Rainbow about the letters, and yet she flew off to Applejack.  I'd like to think there's a reason for this beyond the farm pony saying that she could come to her at anytime (and that she lived closer), but I could just be over analyzing it...

Anyway, all I can really think about now is rolling fields of golden grass, a hard headed and distraught Rainbow, and two ponies in a land very, very far away... And now that I think about it, something Luna said unnerves me:

Hatred has seeped into this thing, and when it felt the Elements, it lashed out in fear. Sought to throw you as far away as possible. Distance and time, either or both.

There are no good implications here, none at all.  This could be much worse than what we think it may be.

Yep, this story is awesome and on it's way to being another favorite.  Have I ever told you I like your writing style?  I probably have, but repetition can't hurt.  I really like your writing style.

I had a feeling that was where you were going, with the tribes and the pony's elements representing these tribes going to their origin. I had to stop reading mid way through and had come up with the theory, and I'm so happy it turned out to be true~! (That hardly ever happens, I'm so horrible at mysteries and theories ) But, hehe, on towards the actual story and not just me being proud of myself...Very good! I'm a very excited on where this goes, as I haven't read many 'epics' recently, or really any much at all, and it will be nice to read it as it goes along rather than all at once, since it takes the suspence and time of speculating away. Looking forward to more!

No other comments? Huh. First!

Anyway, good stuff as usual. I'd managed to forget how good, really. This feels like the start of something special. Points of interest:

- The time-frame. Setting it immediately after the wedding was done for a reason, I assume, and could mean interesting things for the story. Changeling involvement, perhaps? We'll see.

- The mystery letter. Hmm. I'll guess it has something to do with Fluttershy's family, but I suppose speculation is pointless with four more chapters ready to read.

- This: “Are you feeling okay? I bet you are!” Pinkie said, somehow managing to make it sound like an accusation. “You shouldn’t be okay, you should be super-duper fantastic! What’s up?”  I love this line, for some reason. Your ability to perfectly write Pinkie is still intact, I see.

I'd read on, but it's unfortunately very late here. I'd already be asleep, but the suspense was killing me. So, next chapters will be read tomorrow if possible. Monday at the latest.

>>11597601159760

No other comments? Huh. First!

you're a bit late bro

So this is off to an excellent start. Within and Without is up there in my list of favorite adventure stories. Also, I can't wait to see where the Twilestia shipping ends up.

The first update is 20k words. You don't even know how excited that makes me. I love these adventurous world-building stories, and this has the makings of a grand one.

Well hello there, new Cloudy Skies fic. Yes, I would like to track you.

Thanks for mentioning this in your blog, Kits. Somehow I completely missed it being posted.

OMG a new Cloudy Story instant fav to this day Within and Without is still my Number one Favorite.

I love really long Adventure Stories of Worldbuilding with or without TwiLuna Elements.

Faved

So the placebo effect doesn't work with magic, then.

Hmm. Given that the Elements were involved in the spell, it seems likely that they were what caused the teleportations. Intentionally, maybe? It could be that they have some sort of plan for their bearers, a lesson to teach them or something. And now that I think about it, the bearers all seem to be ending up in places of significance to both themselves and the Elements. Twilight was sent to the Everfree ruins, where she discovered the power of friendship and first activated the Elements. Dash was sent to her former home of Cloudsdale, which was also the site of the first Sonic Rainboom, which set in motion the events that would eventually bring the Mane Six together.

So it stands to reason that Fluttershy and Applejack have been sent to a similarly important place. Taking into account the story's synopsis, maybe it has to do with the creation of the Elements, or some ancient usage of them. Fluttershy's letter is probably tied into it, too.

The description of Pinkie as a conversational freight train is also worth mentioning

I generally feel terrible. Cloudy releases an adventure fic, and I have only just carved out twenty minutes to read the prologue. The prologue after like three days! D:

Study law, they said. It will be fun, they said. Let me tell you right now, reading 73k word cases may be a lot of things, but 'fun' is certainly not an appropriate adjective.

Anyway, I have read the prologue, haha. Concise set up, intriguing, and some great character interaction so far. Needless to say, I am looking forward to the next time I can eek out a little more time to continue reading, haha. Hopefully it will be sooner rather than later!

And it looks like you have beaten me quite nicely in the release of adventure stories, haha. I guess that's what happens when you get sidetracked with other projects while waiting for cover art!

Keep up the great work, Cloudy. I can't wait to see this one pan out.

All right, so my Element theory was accurate. And we're starting to see some of the Hearth's Warming story's innaccuracies being revealed. Three alicorns, huh? I'm not generally a fan of OC alicorns, but I have to say I'm interested in seeing where this goes. Assuming Celestia and Luna were two of them, I'd guess they sided with unicorns and pegasi respectively. So the third one would be the earth ponies' leader/god/whatever, and might have powers related to agriculture or something. I also get the feeling he or she might still be around, possibly leading the descendents of these earth pony villagers.

And we finally got a partial explanation about Fluttershy's letter. So it was from her parents. Now the question is why that's a problem.

Oh, poor Applejack. I'm guessing you think that since you believed what you were doing was lying, your element reacted to that untruth and did this. Guess I'll have to wait and find out.

>>11603281160328

Yeah, I know. I was referring to the first chapter specifically.

Anyway, this chapter took some interesting turns. I hadn't thought to blame the 'glittercoal' for the teleportations at all; I'd figured the Elements or some outside force were responsible. Luna's comment about 'distance or time' was also intriguing, specifically the 'time' part. If AJ and Fluttershy might've been thrown through time, that opens up a whole new can of possibilities and directions this could take. Can't wait to see how it goes.

Look at that! Two more chapters :D And now we have a good ol' fashioned adventure on our hands, people! This is gonna be a fun ride.

Cloudy Skies writes one of his patented longfics wherein one of the ships is Flutterdash... My body is ready.

Handel's Messiah is insufficient to describe the pure, unbridled joy I felt upon seeing the EQD post. Cloudy, I loved Within and Without, and now I'm in love with this and it's only just begun. I look forward to the places you will take me and the roads you will show me. Adventure awaits.

Ooh this is good. gonna nom on this story for a while.

Very nice pace

"conversational freight train that was Pinkie Pie."

this is gold. XD

excellent work

The reason i love your stories is the fact that you can write the mane 6 PERFECTLY and i love the way they interact with each other in your stories. It just makes it feel like an actual episode. On to 4 more chapters!

one error (Rd wasn't what you call supportive during dragonshy, aj was though.) just pointing it out. still good though,

hmm a big load of not much :-D

Cloudyyyyyy, it's Monday night! I have work in the morning! How could you do this to meeee?

... Ah the heck with it. *page one*

I wonder if you feel oddly about this fic. I imagine many people (such as myself) will be comparing it to Within and Without - some people might find that to be a lot of pressure. Or maybe I'm overestimating WaW's impact since it was such a major part of my joining this fandom in the first place.

EDIT: Oh hey, this was posted three days ago... >_> <_<

>>11591821159182 I will of course not spoil anything, but it's a treat reading peoples' theories and such. Writing so much Fluttershy has definitively been a challenge, and I fully assume that not everyone will like the way I do it as you do; some want her to be like she was in S1E1, some want her to be Strong(tm) and have changed, and between those camps, it's impossible to please everyone I guess, hah.

>>11595451159545 Thank you! I hope it does not let you down; I definitively wrote this aiming for something on a bit of a bigger scale than my other, recent stuff.

>>11611841161184 It was a bit awkward, I either had to upload the first two chapters, or the first five, and I went for the latter. In hindsight, I wonder if I should've started slower; while there are plenty here in the comments field who say they enjoy it, I am not sure it has as broad an appeal as I had hoped.

>>11616781161678 Well. No pressure right? Breathe, Cloudy. Breeeeathe. Hi again!

>>11616951161695 Would you believe me if I said I really really want to do more TwiLuna in the future? After S2E4, Luna's got something like characterization. I'd love to try my hoof at it again!

>>11621011162101 A frightening amount of people have commented on exactly that sentence, haha.

>>11660861166086 Oh gosh, don't stress, but I'm eager to hear your thoughts nevertheless! Studying law is the fastest way to lose your life. Forever!

I have friends (multiple) who've studied law. I salute your choice and your mettle.

>>11735301173530 Submitted to EqD a week or so ago, released this- yeah, three days ago. I was trying to coordinate, and failed miserably. Sorry!

>>11723721172372 You are very kind, and I hope that the story doesn't disappoint!

Cloudy Skies, you never disappoint. Never.

>>11743231174323

Well, you can't please everyone. Besides, as you pointed out, most of the people in the comments do like it so far. That's gotta count for something, right?

I... I am not sure if I can gather the courage to read this.

I have read over a hundred of stories in this fandom, but Within and Without is the only one I read twice. Both times I was completely off track for a week afterwards. Together with Eternal, it had changed me, and the way I look towards this fandom. It inspired me to try writing my own story (which is still in progress).

I am not sure if I can handle this again. I may not survive.

Well, if anyone needs me, I'll be in my room reading. Either that, or I'll be in a psychosis. Either is fine.

Uh oh, new Cloudy Skies fic out. Time to drop everything I'm doing to read it!

ah finally the other shoe drops.

interesting

>“Oh, oh, and does this mean I can fly?” Pinkie asked

>“I would say no, but I would not put it past you to surprise me, either,” Celestia chuckled

Image: http://scranton.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/rsz/mlfw2604_small.jpg

And look at that. I am up to date! Too easy. Just quickly, remember that when you use the word 'princess' as a proper noun, make sure that you capitalize the 'p'.

Eg, "What's going on, Princess?"

Looking good so far! I am eagerly awaiting the next round of updates.

I literally just sat down and read this, along with "Within and Without" over the last 4.5 hours. I regret none of it.

It now poses me the question: How was I not following you before now?

Definitely looking forward to the direction this takes, and how you explore both setting and characters in this (epic) story.

Rating? out of 10. (That makes sense, right?)

Frostwyrm

I haven't read an adventure fic like this in a long long time. I can feel how awesome this is going to be already.

o.o

okay i have no idea where you're going with this.

This fic.

6 ponies get stranded because a magical mishap occurs. Separated in groups of two they go to different locations.

Only 4 of them come back.

The two stranded have been sent to an unknown place, which they don't recognize at home. The two mares have to mare-up and start thinking in where they are.

Meanwhile the other 4 at Ponyville discover what sent them wherever they are, and they can't do nothing.

Days pass, the stranded mares find out about the unusual land, discovering, while they storm the only road, that the elements where there, as well as 3 alicorns, that only earth ponies have lived in there, and that something wrong happened.

The other 4 are powerless, fighting in a desperate struggle against their own feelings, against that sensation that consumes your very soul, the feeling of being powerless against a desperate situation. Their minds and bodies are breaking down, in all 6 of them.

Their future is uncertain, their present, madness.

This fic is not just well written, it is capable of reaching the most deep part of the soul, getting inside the core of your self.

The abilty of Cloudy Skies to storm my hearth is absolutely indescribable.

You have an avid reader here, waitng for your next chapter.

My mind just exploded. Twice.

Well, this just got creepy as hell. When they ended up on a giant prairie, I was expecting something like Dangerous Business' Gildesdale without the Daleponies. But now... yikes. And I think I have a theory as to what's causing this: Discord. This seems a little dark for him, but we know time travel might've been involved in bringing AJ and Fluttershy here; maybe this is during his original reign. We have non-sensical magic changing the landscape, towns that have been recently inhabited when they shouldn't have been, AJ and Fluttershy starting to exhibit signs of straying from their respective Elements... it's a possibility, at least.

Can't wait to find out.

>>11743301174330 Give it time, haha. Thank you, though!

>>11744591174459 Oh, um. Wow, just, um. Er. I'm both sorry to hear it (I think?) and very flattered, but t'aint a big deal, honest. I wish you luck with your own writing tho!

>>11794071179407 I'm glad someone got that, haha.

>>11798301179830 Gah, I had it pegged as being usable as a non-proper noun when it wasn't.. well, no, it's always a title, never mind. Thanks!

>>11798821179882 If you read W&W/O in 4.5 hours, I believe you are due for a prize. Please talk to the pony at the exit for your t-shirt! (Seriously, that's crazy fast.)

>>11827161182716 It's always innerestin' to read somepony elses' summary of a fic, and commenting is of course hard due to spoilers and such, but I certainly hope to show that the world isn't all that bleak. I hope the rest of the story pleases you though!

>>11831251183125 Mum's the word, sir! So much fun to read all the theories, you've no idea!

This is right excellent. The crumbling of the relationships between the mane 6 (and the Princesses) is well thought out and entertaining to watch, so long as it works out in the end (as it seems it already has between Dash and Pinkie&Rarity).

How the characters seem so far (IMO):

  turning to 'new'

???

obstinate

  See above

  despairing

See above

eating cake.

You would rather not discuss this with the Twilight and her friends

She's the GODDAMN TWILIGHT, huh?

omg i think i figured out the letter

POTENTIAL SPOILER!

something about dash and fluttershy marrying and fluttershy's parents disapproval, hence why the wouldnt go to the wedding

Are we quarreling?

I don't know why but that made me happy.

Really enjoying this, one of the best new stories I've read in a while!

Looking forward to the next update!

Right, so I FINALLY can sit down and read this story (even though I SHOULD be working on the comic/tumblr/assets for future updates TO the tumblr/my drawing/writing stuff on my own (HAH, like I'll ever get time to do that)/3D Models I promised to concept out months ago *grumble grumble*), and I have to say, I'm very much enjoying what I've read so far. You can write the ponies perfectly, which is no surprise since you've spent a long time working on each of them (with maybe the exception of Rarity since she hasn't had all that much limelight, but even still, she's pretty much spot on), you wonderful worldly word-wizard, you.

I also really have to thank you for writing AJ as you do. It's so refreshing to see AJ written as she is here where the "I's" are not "Ah's" and so forth. It gets a bit grating in the tonne of other fic's that feature her, because mainly yes, we know she has a southern drawl, but some author's prefer to sort of force it on us. Mind you I can tolerate that (it really isn't much of a problem, just one of those niggling little nuances that you sometimes like, sometimes dislike), but some fic's slather on the southern accent so thick that you would swear you're talking to Bubba from the south talking about how he likes to drink lots of beer, shoot his rifles and have relations with his mother-sister-cousin-wife... wait, where was I? Oh yes, thanks for writing AJ like this!

Now! Onto reading the rest!

Rainbow Dash is her oldest friend's murderer.

It's always a fear of mine when reading fic's with Luna in them where they'd make Luna a bit too obnoxious with the Canterlot voice. I can firmly say that this is absolutely not the case, and you've pulled off Luna with ease! You manage to keep her in character, and still make her a bit forceful with what she says, without having to resort to the Canterlot voice to get out of a sticky situation. Lesser authors would have capitalized every second line she spoke. I applaud you good sir.

And Celestia's characterization is also amazing. God damn you! You could probably make lines for freaking Berry Punch and have her in character.

Gah, you make it look so easy!

Hmm, so Fluttershy has known for a while, though she dared not say anything. Poor girl, I imagine she's been keeping it held inside her for quite a while.

UPDATE EVERYWHERE

OH YEAH

Aww!

(Third paragraph of this post contains minor Within and Without spoilers, for anybody that hasn't read it)

So it wasn't Discord, then. Good. He'd have probably stolen the show, and anti-Windigoes are at least as cool anyway. Those things were a good idea; believeably connected to the Windigoes and the Hearth's Warming story, yet new and original. Add in the fact that Starswirl created them, and we have some thoroughly awesome monsters.

Now that they're out of the way, though, I'm glad to see the story taking a more upbeat turn. With their secrets out and friendship restored, Fluttershy and Applejack can hopefully set aside their problems and focus on working together to get home. And the former unicorn kingdom is their next stop. That's bound to be interesting. I'm also curious to see what else they'll find out from and about this Brighthoof guy. I get the feeling he'll be important in helping them unravel the alicorn mystery.

I like how you're handling the FlutterDash side of things, so far. It's similar to W&W/O, with Fluttershy having followed Dash to Ponyville and kept her feelings to herself since flight school. But unlike that story, it has room to play a much bigger role here and (we can hope) actually work out for poor Fluttershy. Can't wait to see where it goes from here.

And then Applejack was a shapeshifter.

So much story, so little time.

>>11990731199073

What? Did I miss something?

>>12033351203335 Nay, that's just how I deal with this type o' story.

>>11990731199073  It turns out that Flutters and RD are half-cousins, and they find out after they wed.

Though, that's not going to happen; I guarantee it.

Ugh, this Applejack is even MORE annoying and smugly superior than the canon one!

Hnnnnnnnnnng... Why isn't there more?

>>12090961209096

Image: http://static.fjcdn.com/comments/Mother%2520of%2520god%2520_0e29a0446d96d138e7f1b06aa63261cf.jpg

>>11855781185578 Please do not be the underestimating of the Twilights! (Erf, fixing asap)

>>11902781190278 >>11946141194614 I'm glad! Thank you!

>>11984841198484 >>11990991199099 Thank you for your kind words, and it's also slightly terrifying because the decision to go with clean "I"'s was made like.. halfway through the fic, haha. I've always used the thicker accent, and then I suddenly just stopped and went all "Wait, why am I doing this?" - so when I do my pre-upload prep pass, I have to replace all the outdated "Ah"'s.

As far as Luna goes, if you want to be anal about it, she technically dropped the royal We ("I will guard the night"), and I probably write her a LITTLE stiff, but I enjoy it so!

>>11990731199073 Er, what?

>>11993591199359 I need to atone for all the crap I give FS, one day.

>>12000841200084 Without spoiling too much (or indeed anything), I was worried that the bit with the Malices would make people think the story's darker than it's gonna be. I was certainly glad to have the ponies back when I concluded that arc, too.

>>12094451209445 Updating as fast as I can, honest; twice a week, Wednesday and Saturday, multiple chapters each time!

>>12111331211133 I keep throwing money at you, but it just bounces off of my screen...

>>11984841198484

Yeah. I used to like "ah", but it gets really obnoxious in longer fics or when AJ is a main character. I've switched to using only a few swallowed "g"s and sentence structure. Every person reading this ought to know what she sounds like at this point.

>>12100501210050  

>>12152701215270 That picture was workin' before... I don't even.

Finally I've gotten round to making a start reading this, I'm really enjoying this so far, you're setting a really interesting scene...

I shall continue reading this shortly and see what the rest of the current chapters hold.

Double update!

The fic is progressing in a way that keeps suprising me.

This has all my attention, until I get distracted.

I can't wait for the next chapter.

You used the word "Lost" way too many time, pal.

Applejack likes her apples :P

>>12114861211486 Try stuffing it in the disk tray!

>>12196131219613 Very glad to hear it, thank you!

>>12260311226031 Well, I hope to continue to please; the surprise is a nice bonus, hah. 2-3 chapters every Wednesday and Saturday.

>>12263271226327 I scanned the master doc for the word, and I'm still not sure what you refer to; there's one area where the word occurs a little often, but that one word can have many uses. I'm not sure what to say; I'm sorry?

>>12263761226376 You have no idea how much I love ending an update on that note.

Started and caught up with in about four hours; Already looking forward to the next bit! You have written these two perfectly. Still, can't help but feel that t's been a while since you've gone back to show how the others are holding up, but I'm sure the pacing wll end up consistent with the rest of the story; It has been consistent so far! Loving it, and terribly interested in this Garden-of-Eden reminiscent "Dreamspire" place.

Damn, I was hoping these chapters would be Ponyville based. Still like where the story is going though.

So they were denied entrance... by a building.  Did I miss something there?

“We’ve been through this. It ain’t your fault any more’n it ain’t my fault that I weren’t born a pegasus.”

It ain't -> Its. Unless you meant for AJ to derp and reverse the meaning (currently this sentence seems to imply it's both their faults, equally, rather than neither of their faults, equally.).