sequel to: Second Chances and the Cost of Life
Twilight lived and died a hero. Her body reanimate by Death itself to act as its reaper. But Death cannot grant life, and she fell in a way worse than before. She became a monster, but was stopped by her own friends.
She slept once again, but Death needs her. So it makes deals, stretches the rules, just to get her to live once again. But living again is difficult, particularly when Light itself remakes you.
Twilight has a new life, and a duty that must be done. The only question;
Will she manage to live a new life, instead of her old one? It's going to be hard. Time to see.
Chapters (24)
Bro, that misunderstanding is becoming...
Problematic.
Personally, I felt that Second Chances and the Cost of Life had ended rather weakly. Not to say that either you're writing or you're execution fell flat, rather I was left grasping for information that could not be found.
So with this in mind, I had believed this sequel to be an attempt at milking your story for all it was worth.
I'm glad to have been proven wrong.
Had Seconds Chances been intended to be a longer tale, I'm sure it could've fulfilled whatever expectations I'd had— for I certainly know nothing of them now— but it wasn't. The premise felt as if it would be better tailored to a particularly long one-shot or story spanning hundreds upon thousands of words, yet it didn't. Instead, you deemed fit to make it fast-paced and unyielding— unbeholden to no will but its own. Verily, undeath treated young Twilight in the same fashion.
Then I come across this. Twilight Sparkle is to be of flesh once more and as the stars, no less.
Surely, you can understand my apprehension in regards to reading this, no?
But— caution or no— I read on. And I as I finished this
fourthfifth chapter, I realized:You're scraped together a world of vague political intrigue based around disturbingly abstract motivations, fitting comedy where it's needed, and that cliche 'double life' scenario. But you're making it work.
And that deserves applause more than anything.
8370644
That is possibly the most well thought out commentary I have ever seen, anywhere. An excellent job of articulating both your displeasure, and your pleasure. I do hope that the benefits are outweighing the negatives though.
The story often builds itself as well: Twilight's undeath rather ran away with itself. It came on its own and was... surprisingly demanding, leading to the fiery end and that story's darker tone in comparison to this one.
At first, the stories were one. However, this part is different enough to be considered a different tale altogether, hence the separation. The story goes on, but very differently than before.
So, full appreciation for your comment. Makes me think a little more about what I'm doing.
... I do hope that boils down to something like 'good job' and or 'I like the story'.
8370745
Yes. Yes, it does boil down to 'I like the story'.
And don't worry; the highs points are outweighing the low points. By quite a bit.
Oh, and you're grammar's actually decent, which is more than I can say for a few other writers on this site.
I apologize for forgetting about two of your stories, and boy did I miss out.
I noticed one error here. The "n" in "patterns" is missing. I apologize if there are others I missed or you would prefer if I looked at the more recent chapters... Sorry.
Why, oh why, did I not see this story before.
You make your stories with a literary Midas touch,
I've read the first 3 chapters in their entirety and am quite confused by somethings:
1. Is Lux a bad guy? He reeeeeally seems like he's going to be a bad guy to me. Also unless Lux is somehow tied to life he doesnt really seem to have the authority to be making ponies immortal.
2. piggybacking off the first thing, what's up with the caveat to her resurrection? It doesn't make any sense that no one can know who she was previously, yet they're going to leave her with the knowledge of who she once was. What would happen if she meets or is captured by someone who knows mind magic? As soon as they dig into her memories she's gonna die.
3. Is there no god of life in this world? Death could've gone to them to have her resurrected instead of Lux if he needed it as bad as he apparently does.
8589306
The first and second points sort of overlap with one another, so I think I can get both in one go.
Lux is, in the best terms, complex. He is difficult to understand, and as for his motives, he keeps secrets as well. His personality is both truth and lie, which makes it rather difficult to discern truth or lie. He does have the power to make Twilight immortal, but, as detailed in this chapter, he did not have the authority to give her life. He overstepped his boundaries because he felt it was necessary.
Twilight's caveat is made with care, and for several reasons, none of which I'll go into here (spoilers).
Third point: death and life do not mix. Ever. Death went to another power not directly opposing him that would also benefit from his aid. Which life never would.
Is this satisfactory?
8589627
I'll probably have more questions in future but for right now I'm satiated so thank you.
actually, yes.
media.makeameme.org/created/damn-son-do4evk.jpg
twi got game
This story gets all of my yes.
So is Twilight a grim reaper moonlighting as an alicorn princess or an alicorn princess moonlighting as a grim reaper?
Oh... Oh no...
I feel a plot twist co- Oh. Wait. Sorry, it already happened.
Throwing dangerous undead creatures and necromancers into the mix? I was on board with this story already and this only makes it better!
GIVE THIS MARE A WHIP AND CALL HER A BELMONT!!!
But seriously though good story. Thing with Luna and (ugh
) Blueblood is amusing.
8593057
Neither, Luna controls the moon. Twilight's an alicorn princess starlighting as a grim reaper.
Well... Shit
And it all crumbles to ashes...
If only Tia knew the truth.
Ha. I was hoping that she could have cured the vampire, but perhaps not everything works out the first time.
Hopefully she can catch up with all the enemies she has apparently made soon. This is stressful otherwise. :/
Hopefully we get some idea what Light, Flora, Death, etc are up to. They've got plans, it seems.
I wonder why she can't admit who she used to be, and what Dash is hiding. Not necessarily related of course, but there's definitely something behind that.
...What happens if someone figures out who she is? Would she die or get recalled, or would that be safe? She can only not TELL anyone who she is, so if someone figured it out fully on their own...
I almost look forward to that, if it's followed by a big "Nope, you're fine" or some explanation saying it only mattered earlier.
That's kinda sad. I suspect there's a reason for her behavior, plus "Rest" should REALLY be talking with Trixie at this point...
Good to see Trixie getting a second chance, and seeing that she's not evil.
The cliff ending was a bit mean, though. Odd that a ghoul would kidnap her now, of all times. I wonder what's up with that.
Also, how was Celly supposed to transfer the Element? I thought that they were more or less soulbound, not that they could be regifted to any old pony with a decent level of that quality (not to mention decent, not exceptional).
Still waiting for Celestia's reaction when she figures out that Rest is actually a reborn, and perhaps more importantly, sane Twilight.
Poor Trixie.
Mort's a clever one, though.
... I wonder what Luna or Celestia are going to think of this new idea...
Heh.
Luna? When did you change your name?
I like the storie. Please continue with haste.
Uh oh...
Misunderstandings abound...
Still, I wonder if NMM will behave better this time around?
com'on Luna, you KNOW that you need to get some Rest~
Well that's not good...
Anyway, I noticed you hadn't updated anything in awhile, but it's nice to see your still around and working on your fics. Keep up the good work!
Creepy. That necromancer is NOT good news. And I feel somewhat bad for Death.
I had hoped that she could save Trixie, too...
It's looking less likely. :(
Wait so it's Trixie dead or not? Also I'm surprised this doesn't have the death tag if so
This is a great story. I can’t wait to keep reading! This truly deserves its own art...
And now with the love triangle in place the shenanigans shall ensue. Nothing like good ol’ wheel of misunderstanding to get the gears of plot (and plot) turning. Oh well let’s hope this whole fiasco with Gold Coin isn’t elevated to “world ending” levels of cataclysm. Hopefully.
She literally has both death and light in her corner. She can turn herself ethereal, stop time, and also have I mentioned she’s Twilight bucking Sparkle? The one sure to oust her is pulling a Rumplestiltskin and learning her name! Looks like there’s going to be some ingenuity from them... in the meantime we have a great story to read!
Wow! With all these fantastical (and not so much) threats we now have a whole world of opportunity to explore! So many things to do and learn!
So many ponies to kill.I wonder what inspiringand deadlyadventures lie ahead! Great story with awesome writing!Speak with your mind not your mouth Twilight... at this point you would think she would get it down but nah. Oh well, great writing! I wonder if Night will be okay...?
Twilight never get a break does she? Oh well keep the action high and the blood pumping (this is a necessary step) as you do with your great writing!
1000 percent yes.
8788475
Well... let’s hope she finds out AFTER the characters figure out a way for Twilight to share that without, ya know, unraveling the alicornation/revive spell and killing Twilight again.
9250064
Yeah, that'd be kind of important.
Hoping for more of this story
Trixie may yet live. I hope she does.
Great story, I like how you have handled Twilight's new life.
Angel, and it's misspelled later in the next paragraph as well.
Also, nice ploy. That rabbit is the worst punishment I can think of.
The Slightly Disheveled and Mildly Nibbled-Upon Trixie has survived!
Are we to see the alicorn of death suddenly breaking into a Yes-dance?
I was a bit stressed creeping problems, but ending broke the mood.
And i'm grateful for that.
8367541
I think right now it's rather funny. Until Luna's feelings are not hurt, it's okey.
God, I hate politics.
This is so dirty and mind pressing.
I hope you'll keep it simple.
Out, c'mon!
You gonna keep it secret from us?
Noooooo!
Damn, this is getting a bit uncomfortable.
I'm talking about Luna's delusion.)
Just what did she done wrong to Celestia?
Also, you too evil.