Great story with some amazing emotional drama planted just perfectly within each paragraph. I was a little afraid the pacing would seem a bit rushed due to the type of story this was presented as. But there was never a moment where I had to fill in my own blanks or jump to hasty conclusions when reading. Plus it served as the perfect sequel, I just love your characterization of Rarity.

I'm also a sucker for drama, and more so for good RariDash dramas. Which in its self is a rare occurrence on this site, so I tip my nonexistent hat to you.

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Oh I'm so glad you enjoyed it, and I thank you for reading this story all the way through.
I had a blast writing this story (since I love drama so much), and I'm so glad that a fellow drama lover like you enjoyed it too.

KillerChainsaw ;)

Soaring through the sky Twilight had a feeling that she might as well check Rainbow's cloudhouse first, knowing that may be a little obvious, but also thinking that she might as well give it a try and if the pegasus wasn't there then she guessed she would just have to go searching for her somerwhere else instead, although not really wanting to do that since she wouldn't really know where exactly to start, but thinking that she would just have to settle for it if she did have to do that in the end.

Jesus Christ. One sentence. One gargantuan abomination of a sentence. Have you read books before? Have any of them droned on quite so repetitively? I want this criticism to come across as constructive, but I’m just too mad and frustrated right now. I’ve started skipping three or four entire paragraphs at a time (sentences, really, but that’s only because you’re so deathly afraid of a damned period) without missing any crucial information. Did you get that? I’m saying 75% of your work, conservatively, is useless, boring filler. Do better.

I’ll fix this one for you:
Soaring through the sky, Twilight sure hoped Rainbow was home. She didn’t really know where else to look.

^ That’s it. Have I said any less than you?

"What do you mean?" Rainbow asked after a short pause, Twilight knowing that she was only asking her questions so that she wouldn't have to answer hers, but not letting the pegasus ask her way out of this one it seemed.

Fixed it for you:
“What do you mean?” Rainbow asked, clearly stalling for time.

"Because...I guess I don't want anything to change between us, I like where we are right now, and I don't want either one of us getting hurt," Rainbow stated in a low voice, continuing to just look in front of her and not at Twilight, finding it easier to talk about her feelings when she wasn't looking at the pony that she was telling them to right now it seemed.

You do this a lot - ending paragraphs (sentences. It’s just a single sentence. AGAIN.) with the phrase “it seemed”. What purpose does it serve? Is there a chance the preceding assertion is incorrect? Is it important for the reader to know there’s a chance? IMO, the answer to both of these questions is no. Get rid of “it seemed”. This is wishy-washy, flabby writing. That “right now” phrase should also go.

You have literary ticks, did you know that? “It seemed” and “right now” are two of the more irksome ones.

Rainbow hesitating at first looking down to Twilight and thinking of just turning tail and escaping back to her cloudhome, but then looked to Twilight's understanding expression and slowly came to now stand beside her on the ground. Twilight nodding to Rainbow, before she now called to all the others and caught their attention.

Is English not your first language? That would explain a lot. For example, you commonly use the present indicative at the start of a paragraph, even though the whole story has been written in past tense. Should be

Rainbow hesitated at first, looking down at Twilight and considering escape.

You could also do

Hesitating at first, Rainbow looked down at Twilight and considered escaping back home.

Annnnnnd finally, you realize that Rarity has never, not once, pleasured Dash in return? Some very one-sided sex going on. How can she have all these pent up feelings for the generous pegasus and be content to just lie there and get serviced? Selfish. Rude. Rainbow has needs too…