• Member Since 17th May, 2012
  • offline last seen Sep 15th, 2023

Mr Unsmiley


Writing the stories you didn't know you wanted. I think.

Comments ( 10 )

Yesssssss, this was fucking great. The band's interactions, Ember's depiction as someone who's always on the side of the group and uncertain about her feelings and appearance, just...yeeeessss.

I don't want to seem like a dick but I wish there was more to this somehow. Like what was Garble up to, maybe he met Gilda again (or Soarin, that would be interesting), getting a straight answer out of Spike (which wouldn't be fun but at least clear, although maybe I need to read this again to understand the subtleties), maybe another chapter with Scootaloo (maybe talking to Garble, wink wink).

I'm rambling but this story is just so full of great material that I can't help it :twilightsheepish:

I really liked this. Had numerous thoughts on it as I was reading, but upon reaching the end I am mostly just confused about the timeline.

So it was Ember and Spitfire, with Spike and Scootaloo at the same time, then followed by Spike and Spitfire, and finally Ember and Spike? Or were Ember and Spike earlier in the evening, with Spike and Spitfire as the last thing?

I've never seen human or EG Spitfire done well before, that was fantastic to read. And I'm presuming Garble is the drummer, and Ember plays guitar or keys or something as well as singing? I really liked Garble as an arsehole that was right too often to dislike.

The mixing of dialogue and sex scenes was interesting, and definitely made it feel like not a clop story.

Awesome job, thanks for writing :pinkiehappy:

ROCK ON!

8201337 The second one!

Well, this was an interesting new way of structuring. Left me a little confused at first but I suppose nonlinear storytelling isn't all that common anyway. Other than that, funny shenanigans as always and definitely enjoyed it. Also, even when hungover and under the covers with only a few lines, Dash still manages to be the funniest in this story. :rainbowkiss:

Hey, I reread this last night, and I think I owe you an apology. I read it when it came out last May, and I liked it a lot, but my comment focused mostly on confirming the order of events, and I think as such I didn’t say enough about the story itself. So, I say now:

This story is fucking spectacular.

Seriously, I think this is in the top five or so stories I’ve read on the site. Every POV - especially the sex ones - did such a great job of showing who the characters were, each so distinct from the others.

You managed to make Garble into a likeable character :rainbowderp: That’s seriously impressive in its own right. And Spike, come to think of it; you gave him a role where he didn’t feel out of character, but he still held the spotlight better than he ever has in canon. In fact I can’t say I’m massively keen on Garble, Spike or Scootaloo in canon, and they were all so good here. Garble was the least-amazing character in the story, mostly by virtue of being in it least, and even he was superb.

Ember’s characterisation was wonderful. She was out of her depth, and feeling adrift amongst all the people. And I liked her body image issues as a parallel of how in Equestria she’s a tiny dragon alongside her enormous father. And nothing looks better on the lower half of a rock star of either gender than leather trousers. That’s what they’re for :rainbowdetermined2:

And then there was human Spitfire. Her entrance scene was everything I wanted. And she kept going, and didn’t disappoint :raritystarry: Not many manage Spitfire’s charisma half as well as it’s done here, where she has a magnetic presence the moment she enters the story.

Also, all those bassist jabs! :rainbowlaugh: As a musician, I’m mostly just jealous of their success :facehoof:

9040305
Thanks so much for the compliment, I'm glad you liked it! If I'm being honest, the only reason I haven't deleted this story was because it's a commission; it's probably my least favorite so far. I'm glad other people found something to like about it.

9041870 That’s a great shame, but thanks for the warning - I’ve downloaded it just in case. Can I ask what it is about it you’re not so keen on?

9041919
I thought I'd try the different pacing to make the story stand out more, and to justify having four different sex scenes, but now that I look back at it, it just seems obnoxious. I also don't really like the intro with Spitfire at the party, but that's just me.

Regardless, I'm not deleting it or any more of my works, at least not any time soon.

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