Starlight Glimmer's reformation under Twilight's tutelage had only just begun. As the Princess of Friendship's student, Starlight Glimmer still had a lot to learn in the ways of friendship. This is no easy feat, yet her teacher had no doubt in her ability, so she was destined for success, right? Nothing could possibly stop this from becoming a reality.
When a new threat arises from the depths of who-knows-where to attack the kingdom of Equestria and kidnap Twilight Sparkle in the process, Starlight is forced to learn years worth of friendship in just a matter of days as they track the one responsible for this atrocity down. Banded together, will she and the rest of the harmonies of friendship be able to save Twilight Sparkle? Only time will tell...
Very interesting start. I look forward to seeing where you're heading with this.
7852449
Thanks. I really enjoyed writing this. This was partly inspired by "Wheel Of Time" series by Robert Jordan.
I think the other starlight is future starlight, coming from the future to defeat the monster.
7887156
Yeah, that was exactly what I was going for.
How'd you think of this as a start?
7887170 Pretty Good!
7887202
Nice. I shall endeavor to continue to make it good!
I've personally made this rule for myself in making any of my fanfiction. (my only exception on this site is the one that got the most down votes, my horror fic.)
1. If I don't want to read it immediately after writing the story/chapter or whatever, I rewrite it until I do.
I know this generally works for me because I usually can't stand the re-intake of the same entertainment in so soon a duration. If it's really good, then the process of re-intaking the entertainment seems fine to me.
I know for a fact that it's not a perfect system as one - I'm applying this rule through a biased filter that could potentially cause me to fall short of making the story greater (or perhaps even acceptable to other paradigms), and two - because said filter does not encompass all really good entertainment, I could stumble upon something really great in my writing and not even realize it.
But at the very least, because of this rule I tend to put my stories under more scrutiny than I otherwise would.
Don't make a sex-joke don't make a sex-joke don't make a sex-joke...
Is he going to appear later?
Paging Mr Chekov!
Is that a...satyr?
I'd say it sounds more like AJ to say it as varmint
Ah, guess I was wrong.
I think someone's got issues.
I'm getting Ursula-Morgana vibes off this guy though I could be wrong.
Why does this guy sound familiar?
cdn.images.express.co.uk/img/dynamic/36/590x/secondary/Picture-587876.jpg
No-one's twenty percent cooler than Discord!
Okay. I've read this over and, while I quite like where this is going, I've two key bits of advice.
1. While the dynamic between Starlight and the Elements is very decently done, don't make her fall into a 'Replacement-Twilight' role. Make sure to include moments where she reflects on the fact that she can't replace her and moments where Twilight's absence and the uncertainty of her fate weighs on her friends, Spike especially.
2. Unless there's a legitimate reason (Like say, he's his father or former master or something) don't make Eternus better than Discord in every way. Using new tricks he's unfamiliar with is fine but when you create an OC villain to be twice as better than an already very popular canon villain, it never looks good. Make sure to differentiate them, give them both strengths and weaknesses they can both counter and if they do come to blows and Discord loses, again, make sure it's for a good reason like, say, Eternus has Fluttershy.
A 'You've Grown Soft' moment.
I hope this helps and I'm looking forward to the rest.
8515663
First, thanks for the amazing comment!
Thanks for the advice. I may have unintentionally fell into those traps had I not taken a hiatus to improve my writing. My plans for Starlight weren't to be a replacement, but something else which I dare not reveal yet. And we'll come to find Eternus's weakness soon enough.