• Member Since 5th May, 2013
  • offline last seen Last Friday

Carapace


No.

Sequels1

E
Source

Flat teeth or fangs? Velvety smooth coat or firm carapace? Mane or headfin?

Thorax frets over which face he wishes to show the crystal ponies his age. Fortunately, there's somepony willing to offer a word or two of comfort and support, as well as teach him a life lesson that will stick with him forever.

Preread by Fahrenheit and Timaeus.

Loosely inspired by this piece by Starshade001. Used as cover art with permission from the artist.

Youtube reading by Chaotic.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 43 )

This was nice. very nice.

Have my like.

7705200 I'm glad you enjoyed it. It was fun to get inside Thorax's head for a bit ^^

Hot damn, do I love everything about this.

Thorax's constant inner conflict as he's forced into a pony acclimation crash course, causing what he knows about changeling culture and what he's been indoctrinated about ponies to make him all sorts of indecisive is excellently portrayed in the dialogue and narration. Really helped me get into the imaginative role and appreciate him better as a character*. I mean, yeah, I burned out on changeling fics in 2013 so I don't know if any of what I just mentioned is cliché of them, but I loved their execution here nonetheless. Good contrast between Chrysalis's iron hoof and the Crystal Empire's ruling ethos as well.

Meanwhile, Shining is almost too reasuring and affectionate--and I say that as the author who wrote the book on shipteasing round these parts, just saiyan :trollestia: But I love him here too--overflowing with heart and fatherhood--a gentlestallion's gentlestallion whilst also possessing a firm hoof. If this is how your Shining is usually written, I may well have to crack open your other works. Extra points for having him shrug and just tell Thorax that being accepted wouldn't be roses and candy all the way through, lol.

10/10 would read again. Bang-up job, Casey. :rainbowkiss:

*which, pre-coronation, I rather didn't seriously Hasbro stop rushing your damned episodes-

7705426 Oh wow, I'm glad you thought so!

Yeah, I really wanted to play up on how nervous and given to anxiety Thorax was in his appearances. I figured his constant shifting between Crystal Hoof and natural form would be a good way to drive that home without being too redundant with the usual ears drooping or wings giving a mournful buzz. It also seemed to fit the idea of a kid in highschool anxious as to how he wants to make a good first impression with his classmates on his first day.

As for Shining, yeah, he was a bit heavy on the pseudo-father angle on this. If not for the way it might have jarred the POV around, I think I would've liked to shift it to his narrative voice for that scene at the end. With that said, I'm glad you thought his response to Thorax's request for orders/definitive answers worked. I really wanted to drive home that he has to learn how to function for himself in terms of making these big life choices, and give it a sort of adoptive family dynamic. It's perhaps a bit out there in terms of headcanoning for the group, but I kinda like the feel. It also gives Cadence, Shining, et al a way to learn about him as well. Might be something I play around with in later writing.

And yes, this is generally how I try to portray Shining—a lovable goofball with moments of insight sprinkled atop being a magical badass-slash-doting husband. And maybe a couple trips over nothing for funsies. :P

“I distrusted you and remembered what the Queen did to us, and I projected that on you. But I never hated Thorax, the lone changeling.”

I really enjoy the distinction.
Good story, I like it!

It dawned on my last night

Think you meant to say 'it dawned on me'.

7705673 Thanks. I'd hoped that would fit Shining well. Seemed like a fair rationalization.

7705681 Ffffffffffffffffffffff—

I think that you should expect to get more praise for the way you've written Shining Father. Really, I think this is exactly the way see or think of him: That his suspicion over a changeling sighting in the Empire was less over what happened to him and Cadence personally and much more over concern of a threat to others. Protecting others is his special talent, after all, so it's very, very easy and in fact, preferable I think to portray him as the archetypal Papa Wolf: A generally bumbling goofball who turns into a badass when it matters most (as long as the script doesn't call for someone else to be the hero), and then goes back to being a goofball.

What clinches it here, however, is his interactions with Thorax showing that he's all about protecting ponies (and others) from more than just physical threats, and does what he can to give advice so they can navigate difficult situations and come out all the better for it. I love that, and I really wish we got to see more of it in the show.

7705688 It's meant to be a mix of both, really. Protecting the Empire is a priority, but there's always going to be that nagging feeling in the back of his mind whenever he thinks of the changelings because of what happened at his wedding. Still, in this (and in A Husband's Intervention), he is in the process of trying to give Thorax a chance. The little rules I developed for this seemed natural because they could be shown as beneficial to everyone in the Empire, rather than just saying "don't be mean to our pet changeling" or giving him carte blanch to shapeshift and waltz about as he pleases.

I thought about including Cadence and Flurry at the end, but I felt this was solid with just these two. Plus, the idea that Shining threw up a shield to protect himself from the oatmeal shower was just too good to pass up for many reasons.

I really enjoyed this story. The plot point the Thorax is a young adult in ponies eyes and must attend school is not one I have seen. I like it. If you had the time I would not mind a short story about his mis-adventures in school.

But as is this is perfectly fine.

-BFBL

'In the mirror, I see his reflection poke its head around the door jam'

Jamb

I quite enjoyed this. Kudos to the writer. +)

How was I supposed to know that “Thorax, put Flurry Heart to bed” didn’t mean to wrap her up in a warm cocoon pod and hang her upside down beside mine?

That is just adorable. Although I'm amazed that just one changeling could make a pod big enough for those wings. xD

I'll bet that Thorax would ally himself with the Crystal Empire as of now.

This is a very good one-shot.

7771861 But maybe in the Crystal Empire, it really is made of crystalized jam! :pinkiehappy:

Huh. Just read this so I can read Dear Small Pony Book, but this is really nice, showing Thorax being nervous and stuff, and then resolving to use his born form!

Interesting backstory for Shining, with the option of going into warding research.

Onto Dear Small Pony Book! Thorax's adventures in school! I think...

8116285 Hey, thanks! Glad you enjoyed it enough to do a reading ^^

This is nice. You conveyed indecision very well. I hope Thorax has a good time in school.

I can't wait to read more of your work!

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

Well! That one sure turned out differently. :)

8343142
Glad you enjoyed it ^^

a perfect story i love it.

By changeling norms, we are adults as soon as we conduct our first successful hunt, a trial in which we beguile a pony and feed on their love, then away without being caught. Ponies, on the other hoof, decide based on number of years

Either need to add the word "get" or change it to "escape"

This is quite normal. It's called a "rite of passage". You are born a child & stay a child until you undergo the rite. Here in the USA, we don't have a formal rite, but do have several informal ones: Drinking, drug use, sex, & (outside of New York city), The Biggie -getting your Driver's License.

Based on the show, I'd say that the Pony equivalent is getting your Cutie Mark.

I really liked this, it shows how different a Changeling's mind and thought process is to that of a pony, how he's lived with all these concepts and rules and now, everything is wildly different, he's understandably nervous because this is a big thing, he's jittery, but you can understand and sympathize with his jitters. And Shining Armor, Shining, Shining, Shining, he shines in this, (pun absolutely intended) in that he's a father figure to Thorax as well as a friend, he's his boss, in a sense, but he's not just "do this, do that", he's letting him make his own decisions and trying to help him because he's gone through something similar and understands his fears. He's expertly written here, kudos. Yes, he distrusted Thorax at first, but never outright hated him because he himself never did anything to him, while he has every reason to hate Chrysalis after what she did to him AND his wife and he was projecting that onto Thorax. This kind of story is the shit I LOVE. Not grand adventures or laugh till you're in actual pain comedies, but just character pieces, characters talking naturally, discussing things, problems, fears, doubts, and reassurances. This kind of writing flows like a river, it's so natural, I can see the characters in my mind, hear the sound effects, see the little twitches and tics, it's, it's real great.

After coming back from what seems to be the final chapter of 'Dear small Pony book' (what with the link to this story and all)
I quite like the change of mood and pace.

Don't get me wrong, the other story was nice and lighthearted and fun and great.
But this one seems just as great.

LOOKIN FORWERD MATEY HAHAAAAA
BOOKS!

With the context of Dear Small Pony Book, I have to appreciate both how much Thorax has grown and how much further he still has to go. Glad I finally read this one.

8950250 Er, that wasn't the final chapter of the fic. It was the last chapter of that arc ^^;

8970066 I'm really glad you think so. If there was one challenge between the stories, it's that working backward to figure out what Thorax came from then getting him to this point, where he's learned a lot but still is a bit unsure, was tough to gauge properly.

8970354
Heh, I realised that a bit late...
:twilightsheepish:

Love me some good changeling fics. Well done!

I loved this story in showing Thorax inner turmoil of how he should approach pony society and Shining being a parental figure. Plus we never did see his Crystal Hoof disguise anymore.

This is excellent. Not only a touching look at Thorax, but also brilliant characterization for Shining Armor. It's great to see him be a parental figure, drawing on both his status as a father and as an older brother to share his wisdom. He comes across as a kind and just ruler. Well done.

Warmth floods my chest. Home. The Crystal Palace is my home too. My smile turned into a full, toothy grin that showed a mouth full of sharpened teeth along with the full length of my fangs.

Yet he didn’t flinch or recoil in fear. Shining simply drew back and fixed me with a wry look, then glanced over his shoulder for a split second before looking back at me.

To be fair, Shining is probably already used to Spike.

A dragon's diamond-crushing toothy grin is probably a lot worse than a changeling's...

I was drawn to this story by seeing the sequel appear on the feed, so I read this one first. Am I glad I did, for this was excellent.

D'aww he's so cute...

This was sweet. Good inner conflict.

I enjoyed this one, definitely a good read

You know I've always wanted to know how has he been doing these days especially after that episode And he looks like hes doing fine But he still has some doubts about his appearances which it's understandable but I'm glad that shining armor will support him no matter what happen that's cool of him This is a pretty good story

D'awwwwww, that's it, you go be a good Bug-Pone and enjoy being cared for! SO sweet how much they are looking after him.

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