This is the prequel to my first story, Saving Private Bloom. This one is told by Twilight, as she and her squad set out to risk their lives to save one pony. From the terrible battle of Omaha Beach, to the tragic battle of Ramelle, with loses on the way, Twilight has to take risk after risk for the pony she never knew. Saving Private Bloom: The Captain's Logs.
(full cast)
Twilight Sparkle- Captain John Miller Doctor Whooves- Mike Horvach Spike- Richard Rieben
Fluttershy- Timothy E. Upham Apple Jack- Stanley Mellish Rainbow Dash- Daniel Jackson
Rarity- Irwin Wade Scootaloo- Adrian Caparzo Braeburn- Sergeant Hill
Pinkie Pie- Steamboat Willie Hoity Toity- Captain Fred Hamill Vinyl Scratch- Lt. Col. Anderson
Soarin- Lieutenant Dewindt Snails- Private Michealson Photo Finish- Dagwood Dusseldorf
Lyra- Lieutenant Briggs Spitfire- Private Doyle Octivia- Private Deforest
Cherilee- Joe Snips- friend of Michaelson
If anyone wants the password to view the chapters I haven't published, message me.
I understand what you're doing, but that doesn't make it less stupid
"magic is illegal in warfare"
46369
46369 ik wut ur doing with that username, Gandalf, but that doesnt mean u spelt it right.
46386
If you want to earn respect from people you can take criticism like a pony and better yourself or you can resort to stupid name calling, i'm was proud of my stories, but when they got bad reviews I didn't start blaming other people, I listened to them and fixed the problems, or started from scratch. I can't force you to grow up, but it'll happen eventually, by my hand or not.
And dude, read the book, it's Mithrandir, Gray Pilgrim, whatever you want to call it, however you want to spell it, that's what it is.
47016 I read all the books, Lord of the Rings is one of my favorite series. And you just caught me in a bad mood, dude, and kinda made it worse. So sorry
To be fair dude, I was in a bad mood when I read this, and I didn't even really go in depth into any criticism, at least we can be reasonable now, there is hope for the internet! The story as a whole definitely works, there were just a couple things along the way that stood out, like the magic thing ^^, also, I think on the beaches "an explosion happened and arms and legs went flying" like three times. The problem with writing longer stories is that you have to make sure you don't repeat the same sentences (this is why the thesaurus function on Word is my savior). Overall it's a pretty good crossover with a great movie, those things just stood out.
48011 well, the first chapter is kinda dumb that way, but my other two aren't that bad, and i don't repeat much. But, be honest, did I really repeat those?Because ponies don't even have arms
I was just generalizing,
grenade went off, blowing off the legs of a couple of ponies and sending them soaring through the air.
An explosion went off that sent a hoof or two rocketing into the air, and we heard screams of pain
besides that, the magic comment, and beach misspelled a couple times, it seems solid enough, the names are pretty clever, I think, Africolt, and such
48155 Well, what should I do about the magic thing? Because I fixed the beach thing, and i need those descriptions in my story.
Man this was intense and real. Awesome job.
Personally, the movie could of been better.
50300 Thanks, dude! Anything I can improve on> I enjoy feedback
50311 No, not really. Naturally great.
51230
You know, one time my family and I were watching this movie together, and my little sister noticed the water was blood red, and she asked my dad: "Dad, when did the blood clear out of the water?"
My Dad replied: "I hope it never did."
She replied: "Why's that?"
He replied: "So that way no one would forget what happened on that God-forsaken Beach.
Getting back to the story, that was marvelous, I would vote it six stars If I could.
52257 them Pozis, killin' our Jews
52840
Wait, what?
54514 Germane Pozi troops replace German Nazis in the story
54690
Ok, I realized that, but your reply had nothing to do with my original post.
..Atleast he was brave enough to post a fan-fiction. Its harder than you think >_<
58411 who? what?
58412 I just find it somewhat funny that a lot of people who post hateful comments tend to be readers, and not writers (Me included on the reader department) and so they have no idea how annoying it is to come up with a good plot line and write on with it. But, sometimes they even give the best comments, too. Depends on the person.
/rant
58420 um... i dont understand the purpose of ur comment
58427
/rant
Please, for the love of God, change the ending. Don't let Pinkie kill Twilight then be killed by Fluttershy, I wouldn't be able to take it. Also, why mention the Elements of Harmony if apparently Twilight is the only one who knows about them?
66243 Did you read my original Saving Private Bloom? Because you're about 2 weeks too late with that request.
it seemed so graphic.
so far its true to the events of the movie,
i cant believe y9ou made scootoloo the vin desiel character, sigh although it does suit her a bit.
ok this si very accurate to the movie i congradualte you.
so far so good with the chapters , way to be true to the movie.
why the hell did you make pinbkie the badgiuy why for the love of god.
406426 I thought Scootaloo being Adrian Caparzo was accurate because Caparzo is big and strong, but also the caring type of person who remembers to think about others. Like Rainbow Dash, but I wanted her to last a bit longer since she's so awesome
And Pinkie is the main Germane pony because there had to be a mane cast pony on the other team so there's some sort of major character on that side. And since Pinkie is incredibly insane (she's so awesome), I felt it suited for a Germane.
No offence to Germans, I actually like them.
WWII was just run by crazy Germans, that's all.
still cant believe you killed twilight oh well its just a story
HA! LOST HIS DAMN BROWNING IN THE CHANNLE! i would have been pissed, browning automatic rifle is my fav.
jesus. i wouldnt want to meet aj like this on a bad day. o.0
scootaloo,,EVERY BUCKING TIME MAN I SWEAR!!
SHITS GETTIN REAL
RIP.
rarity
66243 i swear to celestia, if you just spoiled this for us....
563383 ^^;;
Excellent recreation. I was heart broken when Lyra died the way she did and this fic helped me to find why AppleJack (Stanley Mellish) cried in, I didn't know he was Jewish. This makes me even pity AJ more, knowing that her people suffered under so much evil and tyranny.
Man the little added details is awesome.
RIP Scoot.
This is the first time I am sad over Rarity's death. I knew it was coming, but the emotion put into it still made me shed tears.
I enjoyed this tremendously. I will now be moving on to the next fic.
This is really good and it feels like I'm watching the actual movie. I should've read this sooner.
Also R.I.P. Scootaloo.
This is really sad. R.I.P. Rarity.
Why is Pinkie wearing an American 29th Ranger Division uniform when shes in the 2nd S.S Battalion?
R.I.P. Rarity, you were one of the best. You're also my favorite pony ðŸ˜.