An alternative to HiE stories. Midnight, a 14th century knight's steed and veteran of numerous battles during the hundred years war, faces her demise during one such engagement only to find that fate has other plans in store; including a chance to start anew in another world. But can a mare who knows nothing but conflict adapt to a land ruled by peaceful pastel-coloured ponies, or will it prove too much?
Warning: contains brief scenes of descriptive violence; especially in earlier chapters. Not enough to warrant an M rating, I think, but hopefully the mods will let me know if I'm wrong.
(Cross-posted from my Fanfiction.net account)
Chapters (9)
I love it, give me more.
>ass destruction
oh god no, get those gay dogs away from me
This is honestly refreshing. I always wanted to see someone try making a fic where a non-human creature from our world landed in theirs but I could never pull that off myself.
Holy shit.....
I have no words.
I don't know what to say.
Just brilliant... that is all i can think of.
Murphy?
This story his quite amazing, truly a shame it has not been noticed.
Still no words other than brilliant, but with the additition of epic.
Sorcery seen and understood to be only a mere tool to use. A tool can can be used for good or evil, all depending on the user of the tool.
I am still very excited and want to devour more of this BRILLIANT story of literature gold
Niiice~ very nice~ Can't wait for more!
Oh no...
I'm sure she will survive...
Right?
right?
So she is stable...
Oh, that's a load off my shoulders. She's fine, recovering nicely.
I just would like to know what Death was thinking at the moment.
So Death is going to the beach and Midnight is good enough to be released from the hospital.
I need more of this awesome high inducing glorious story!
It has been absolutely enthralling read so far. I do hope to more. Especially to how Midnight herself gets adjusted to a more somewhat peaceful or lackadaisical environment. The only known species closest to her are Saddle Arabians based on their build. Even then she is technically magicless. Though for obvious reasons she would be still affected by culture shock regardless.
I think she should have said "Fear not my lord; I shalt not squander this chance. Thank you... and farewell." Thee is the vulgar form, isn't it? 'You' would be more appropriate for someone you respected.
Awesome story idea. I considered something similar, putting Maximus from Tangled in Equestria. If ever there was an equine version of a noble knight sans peur et sans reproach, it's him. Possible romance with princess Luna maybe?
*raise a finger*
It has been proven repeatedly that the world of Equestria does not follow our Celestial Mechanic.
I hope nothing too bad will happen with the whole Zecora incident.
I can foresee troublesome circumstances.
Either she dismiss Pinkie and those who listened to her based on her adversion of Pink socceress, or she might be a bit too aggressive toward Zecora.
You used "clearer heads prevail" a lot here. I hope it will be something you will use when Zecora comes.
What we see Zecora does on the show is more along the line of magical alchemist.
Alright, the rest of the chapter may be great, but I want to point out that while the crafting of the atmosphere is great... You don't paint an accurate depiction of the Battle of Crecy . As a historian or someone who has read up on the Battle of Crecy, my suspension of disbelief was broken quite a bit. Most people probably wouldn't care, but this is basically what a medieval historian or someone more historically inclined would say.
First error. Prince Edward the Third. Really? He was at that time, KING Edward the Third. For one if he was already Edward the Third that meant he'd already be King not Prince. Also, Edward III was definitely KING by the time of the battle.
Two, the arrangement of the army is... inaccurate. I"m not going to debate with whether the longbowmen were in front of the infantry or on the wings. I will say that infantry is a problematic term and a better phrase would have been to say "men at arms" or just knights, because the English main lines were made up of knights.
The biggest concern I have is you say there were cavalry on the flanks of Edward III's army and you describe a cavalry charge by the English that met the french. Here's the problem, it's well known that he ordered all his knights to dismount and fight on foot so they could better rip the French cavalry apart. In fact, the whole English cavalry charge you described with Midnight? That never happened. Crecy was a battle that proved the supremacy of English men at arms/longbow over the French mounted knight. The French charged up into the English men at arms and died in scores as longbows ripped them apart and the English men at arms hacked those who fell off or were knocked off by the bows.
Fact of the matter is, Crecy is not a good choice for Midnight's last battle. The lack of horses on the English side meant well... she and the events that brought her to Equestria never actually existed. You can say this is fiction and you could do whatever you want and yes, people would side with you, but I would reply that in this case, you're heading up against historical reality.
A better battle to use would be the Battle of Poiters, an equally famous battle in which it was Prince Edward (the Black Prince, not Edward III) that commanded and there was English cavalry involved. To the point that the English cavalry turned the tide of the battle in the English favor.
What I can say is that the story certainly sets up Midnight's character and her entry into Equestria well. It's just a pity that as of now, there's no way this would have ever happened.
Bf1 isn't even out yet and it already has a crossover
Damn French...
Just kidding please don't kill me
7577259 This isn't BF1 crossover...This is set several hundred years before then.
Most cavalry charges during the first world war are suicidal in nature.
7577209 The more you know.
Though, it is hard to feel offended when oh so many people butchered historical events.
Propagandas, Media, Entertainment Industry, Stories written in the setting of certain time periods...
So much so that we expect such a thing.
That said, this is still the author's story. And it depend on if the author wants to change it or not.
And or if it is important to the story or not.
At first I thought that Midnight was handling all this really well but then I remembered that the main reasoning she has for all this is witchcraft.
I wonder if she'll try to burn Twilight at the stake when she sees her using magic?
so why dose it say its on hiatus a day after being up loaded i mean thats kinda quick to run out of ideas, unless you were writing that and had nothing eales pland.
grate story by the way cant wait for more
7577364 He also left out the tank battalions and SR71 Blackbirds!
Sheesh, youz guys gotsta learn yer history!
Horses in Equestria?!
What sort of fool thought that was a good idea?!
Hippos in Equestria CLEARLY makes more sense! Also, Flavo and Marita want a cameo...
img2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20130808214551/animaniacs/images/7/7d/Flavoandmarita.png
Hehe. Ass destruction.
7577259 I hate to be the guy to correct you but this isn't a Bf1 crossover, it isn't even a crossover at all.
a thorough bred horse irl is that akward friend who thinks they live in silent hill
7577452 This is probably why:
7577209 People, please don't downvote the post I replied to just because you think the story works just as it is right now. The post raises a valid point and provides constructive criticism for the author to further improve their writing. Vren55 was even kind enough to provide a valid alternative for the battle in which Midnight meets her end, and which would only require small changes to the chapter. If anything, the post should be upvoted because it's rare to see such posts.
More.
7577947 Wow, thanks. I'm surprised my post even got that much attention.
I can kinda see where the downvotes were comign from because I was sounding a bit salty, but I hope if the author is reading this, he's aware taht I tried to be balanced and point out that this is a great opening scene, just marred by historical reality.
...
Welp if you weren't good with battle accuracy, at least you made up in spades with horse armor accuracy! Damn you made me feel the impact of Midnight's charge against the manticore.
It's so good! I can NOT wait for more!
7577690 I knew I forgot my meds
7577999 well...
Historical reality means jackshit when considering the multiverse in the calculation.
I'm not trying to be annoying but all i'm saying that the battle likely went differently in some other verse and we're not talking about our own verse here...
Sorry if i offend you in anyway since that is not my intention...
I'm just offering my view on this subject...
i rather like this story so have a like and fav
though i wonder why it is on a hiatus? life getting in the way i guess?
7578239 If going that route though, it'd probably be better just to leave out the names of the battle and go with the good old unreliable narrator calling it 'the latest skirmish in this long campaign' or something along those lines.
I guess that's not technically unreliable narrator, but you get my point.
7578306 Its because this is a mega-post of 8 chapters in 1 day from a story that was on fanfiction. May be awhile before we get more updates.
7578349 yeah, but details can be changed to fit the theme you want. They're not set in stone afterall when stories and the verses they are glimpses of, are shown
Anyway i'll start sleeping now. Over 1am and got school from 9am to 3pm, ugh...
7578367 ah. thanks for the info
Damn French!
Oui Oui back to Lyon you pompous wretches!
Thanks for the fries though
7577087
I think this story is set early enough to predate that shift. So there would be no connotations of respect or familiarity, just the simple distinction of plural and singular.
7577305 Don't worry..
edb.utexas.edu/faculty/salinas/students/student_sites/Fall2007/Allison_Katie/images/I_Hate_Them_Too.jpg
you missed a great chance for comedic misunderstandings in that last bit there.
media.gamerevolution.com/images/misc/image/monty-python-flesh-wound.jpg
Immediately posted eight chapters, then subsequently put it on hiatus.
Yeah, not gonna bother reading that until it's being updated.
This intro reminded me of the poem "The Charge of the Light Brigade", specifically the ending:
Cannon to right of them,
Cannon to left of them,
Cannon behind them
Volleyed and thundered;
Stormed at with shot and shell,
While horse and hero fell.
They that had fought so well
Came through the jaws of Death,
Back from the mouth of hell,
All that was left of them,
Left of six hundred.
VI
When can their glory fade?
O the wild charge they made!
All the world wondered.
Honour the charge they made!
Honour the Light Brigade,
Noble six hundred!
Ugh, now we need to wait.
First story here and you're on the front page! Congrats, can't wait for more. Especially can't wait to see Big Mac's reaction to the muscle-bound mare.
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