Here's my constructive criticism:

Put it through the design phase and have someone check it over for spelling.

While making a fic, you have to ask yourself, "Do we really need this?"

Think it over.

7476208 also i think about if y'all need this and in my head no out side my head hell yeah

I see potentional in the story, but you need to work on spelling and grammar.

Also question if he's a ghost why didn't he pass through the walls or let their weapons pass through him.

I think this was written in M3M3SP3AK

Moar!!!

7477552 YES!

MOAR!!!

7477088 i well he only looks like a ghost fox hes not actually a ghost

7477088 also if he was a ghist he wouldnt be able to take or hold Ragnarok

7479000 *ghost*

7479000
7478941
If that's the case you should describe that the fur that covers him seems ghostly white. Also some ghost have been known to pick up objects and or in some cases people.

But the story is yours do with as you will. Just don't make any one op please

7479570 sorry i forgot but i did say he had ghostly blue fur and i wont make no one op they have my characters are always different power levels

7480143
From one writer to another I was just pointing something out. This story is yours

a lot of spelling errors

I like the idea of the story but....... it's a mess. There are too many issues I have with this. Like misspelled words, improper grammar, etc. But I'm just some 13 year old. What do I know?

This story seem interesting, but I can't make any sense out of where it is trying to go. I read about a quarter of the way and I could not find what was happening. I am sorry, but you need a proof reader and editor to see what you have.

waaaaay to rushed.
p.s. find an editor

Okay there is fast paced and then there is this shit you NEED a slower pacing and there should be less trust between him and Celestia too. After all NOBODY trusts someone the first six seconds after meeting them and she had them locked in a fucking cage and at first in that scene your character is very serious implying that he WILL breakout if necessary and then he just becomes all buddy buddy I HATE that kind of character as NO ONE is that forgiving or friendly honestly this seemed like it was written by a 13 year old who has never studied English or proper grammar before.

he pur his hand in his sword I found that messed up line in the chapter hope you fix it also I think you should do another look into this chapter there are a lot more mistakes in there some really bad.You should get an editor or someone to check your grammar just saying also I noticed the chapter is kinda rushed you might wanna slow it down a bit. But other than that the chapter is ok

only read this chapter so far, but i think most will agree from what im reading in the comments, good story with a few problems (ie: way to fast paced/ editing)

wahahahahahahahha this is messed up, the protagonist is a blue quadruped ghost like fox compared to ponies which are anthro ponies!

question: WHY?!

More pathetic forgiveness and crap writing to boot, talk about a double whammy.

What! I didn't think anyone else would think of using Ragnarok as a name for a canine. (Pet or otherwise)

First sentence: "What are commas?"

SO MUCH CRINGE!!!! I'M DONE WITH THIS STORY!!!!

Have you considered getting an editor? I don't mean that as an insult -this sounds like a story I would enjoy if it were a bit more polished- but as it stands now it's a bit... rough, I guess would be a good way to describe it.

8932019
Same but i feel more the pacing was alittle too fast

Either needs to be stopped entirely or rewritten without all the garbage.

9183409
It'll take to long

Wait how big is this fox, I never heard of a fox killing a dear

9512504
From the sound of things' I'd say damn near human size. If I had to put something out there based off the picture and the deer scene I'd go with direwolf. That sound about right, boss?

"Um I'm a ghost fox"

Um... Not you.

So i know this has been heard a hundred times before but PLEASE get an editor? Alot of people will do so for no charge but i really would love to read this story post reworks. I love the concepts and themes but the amount of spelling and grammer errors along with the really fast pace just kills any imersion I can manage to get with the story. I really do feel like you could have a featured story with the help of an editor though! Yes it would take alot of time but the payoff would be fantastic. Until that happens though im afraid I cant read the story, however ill check in to see if youve taken any advice ocasionally!
P.S.) Please get an editor and change my mind im out of stories to read on this site

9183409
9183545

Чувак прав. Я хоть из России и английский знаю на привет-пока, но у меня есть переводчик для чтения, и могу с уверенностью сказать, что историю нужно переписать и доработать.

Slow down! Shit dude, you need a editor

10623717
I know right, lol