• Published 22nd Jun 2012
  • 457 Views, 5 Comments

Sketching out a life - ThatOneWierdKid



A misunderstood smalltown pony leaves his home to forge his own life

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A new place in life

"well, I finally did it." Sketch thought to himself as he boarded the Friendship Express to Ponyville. "I finally escaped my old life. Time to move on and start anew."

The ride to Ponyville was generally uneventful, exept for a minor malfunction with the snack trolly, causing Sketch to be covered with assorted nuts and candies. Heartfelt apologies were made, but Sketch didn't care, he was one of those types who were quick with a joke and slow to anger. The only thing he thought was, "Well this is a GREAT way to start out my journey to acceptance." Other than that, you can say it went quite smoothly.

When Sketch got off the train, he was taken aback at how welcoming the town felt. Almost everyone he passed gave him a smile or a nod, something nopony gave him back in his old town. He was just passing a large building desighned to look like someone piled a ton of cakes on each other called "sugercube corner" when all of a sudden;

"ohmygoshohmygoshohmygosh!" he heard "Are you new here? I've never seen you in Ponyville so you must be new!" An energetic pink pony burst almost out of nowhere stopping directly in front of Sketch.

"Umm, yes. I am new here. I was just passing through town and was wondering-." he paused." Wait, how did you know I was new?"

"Because I know everypony in Ponyville, and since I've never seen you before, I knew you were new!" She explained. "I'm Pinkie Pie, and I just know we're gonna be great friends! Whats you're name?"

"Uh, Sketch. Pad. Sketch Pad, and did you say friends?"

"well DUH! don't you have any friends?" She inquiered

"Hmm. well, not counting my brother, no."

"GASP! NO FRIENDS?!?" She said with a horrified expression, "well we need to change that RIGHT NOW! I'm throwing an emergency party for you, Sketchy!"

Sketch was surprized at this. "a-a party? When?"

"Right now, silly! I'm going to go send out invitations, you go Sugercube corner, and hurry! You don't want to be late for your own party!"

Needless to say, almost all of the guests had arrived as soon as possible. There was no way anypony would miss out on a Pinkie party.

"So you're the new guy in town." a Golden-brown stallion said as he walked up to Sketch. "Name's Caramel. I'm a member of the proud Apple family."

"Nice to meet you Caramel. I'm Sketch, and I probably wont be staying long. I'm just passing through trying to find a job."

"well thats a shame," he looked genuinelly disapointed. "So a job, eh? well what is it you do?" He asked politely.

"I do just as the name implies. I'm a sketch artist."

"You're an artist?" a third pony broke into the conversation.

"Uh, yeah!" Sketch replied with confidence "I'm sorry, who are you again?"

"Sorry, names Noteworthy." He apologized, "Anyway, the reason I interrupted is because I heard Pastel, our resident artist here, was looking for a partner to collaberate with!"

"Well that sounds like something to check out! Thanks Blues!" Caramel exclaimed exitedly.

"No problemo, you two. Anyway, I should be getting home now. I've got a preformance in the morning and I'm gonna need my sleep."

"'Kay, see ya!" Caramel called out, just loud enough to be heard over a commotion involving a certain purple mare about how she'd had too many drinks.

"so, Pastel," Sketch asked. "Whats she like?"

"Oh, she's a great mare," Caramel began. "Heck! Even I'd be after her if I weren't already in a perfect relationship!"

"Oh yeah, with who?" Sketch asked.

"Twilight Sparkle. Smartest mare you've ever seen. Also, the Element of Magic! Talk about awesome!"

"Well good for you. Can you tell me where Pastel lives?"

"In one of the two apartments above her studio. I'm sure she would let you stay in the other if you got the job!" He replied cheerfully. "Anyway, if you're gonna stay here, we'll have to hang out! I still haven't introduced you to the Doctor or Thunderlane!"

"Well thanks for all the help, Caramel, and I would love to spend some more time with you and your friends." Sketch told him as he turned to walk out the door.

Finding the studio was not hard at all. It was a large, warehouse shaped building neat the west side of town, With a large mural painted on the wall of Celestia surrounded by adoring subjects.

"Um, Hello?" he called upon entering. "Is this the Ponyville studio? I heard there was a job opening here."

"Yes, hello, just a moment!" A voice called down from the stairs leading up to the apartments. "I'm so sorry, if I had known somepony would show up today, I would have organized more- WOAH!"

A light orange earth pony with a light brown mane suddenly began tubling down the stairway.

"Well," She said while getting up, "THAT was embarrasing!"

Sketch was stunned. Standing in front of him was the most beautiful mare he had ever seen, and she was actually acknowleging him!

"N-n-no, don't worry about it! Frankly, I do something just as clumsy almost everyday!"

"Heh, so, you're here for the job? Whats your name? Specialty?" She asked

"Sketch Pad. And I do just as the name implies."

"Okay, so you're a sketch artist, Thats great! I'm a painter, but my skill with a pencil is uh, below professional."

"No problem. I broght some of my work to showcase, if that makes any difference."

Sketch hands Pastel a worn book, filled with the drawings he's done over the years.

"Uh-huh, uh-huh. I think you will be a welcome addition to this studio. If you want it, there's an empty apartment next door to mine."

"Perfect!" Sketch replied instantly, "Because apperantly, I just moved here!"

"Great!" Pastel replied with equal enthusiasm, "When can you start?"

"Tommorow, as soon as I unpack. And Pastel, I have a feeling this is the start of a beautiful partnership."

Comments ( 2 )

Thanks guys, if this were under normal circumstances and no one payed any attention to me, I probably would have written the rest half- heartedly. I'll make sure not to disappoint!:pinkiehappy:

Well you did ask for constructed criticism, So here goes:
Chapter 1:
I feel this is being far too rush,You could have easily devoted a chapter about his normal life on the farm, How his father treats him on a day to day basis and how the town treats him instead ust telling us, It could have also allowed for some character buildup and Give us a rough Idea what type of character he is.

This also caused the emotional scene to be less impactful, We didnt feel sad he had to leave him much because all your saying is that HE matters to him the most but we dont see much of a reason why ( This also shows that a scene with the town would have easily solved this issue as we dont know what you mean by he is outcasted by them)

I do like the set up of this story but I really think you need to slow down the pace of this story and allow for character building and give us a general history and feeling to the story.

4/10
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Chapter 2:
Again, The same issue seems to be happening here, The scenes seems to come and go out of nowhere and go in an instant.
A good example of this is the Pinkie Pie Introduction and Party, The introduction last for about 7 Lines and then just 2 more lines they are at the party,You could have given time to let him explore the town ,This would have allowed you to give a General feels of the story and allow the character to have some kind of emotion

The party scene is obviously just to get him to know where a job was (BTW, Why would he just walk away from his own party?) plus, He really should be a bit more socially akward as you said in one of the lines that he had no friends and being shund by the community would cause a Littlebit of a problem.

I also dont like how you just flat out made it who the character he will fall for be, It just makes it a tad bit duller for the all round story as you know how it general story will end.

6/10

(BTw, I want to know that I do NOT HATE this story, I just wan to point out where you could improve and maybe for a future story, I am no writer in any strech of the imagination and probably never will be but I just wanted to give you my honest opinion and Didn't mean to offend you if I did)

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