Destroying the fourth wall

by Henry Hatsworth

Part 3

When Thompson had regained consciousness, he was outside the bakery in sugarcube corner. He decided to waste no time in getting to the meat of the scenario he'd created and entered the bakery. When he did, he ducked as to avoid having his head taken off by a wave of magic created by Twilight. Obviously he'd arrived at a good moment.
"Right then, what's all this?" He asked the ponies nonchalantly.
"Thompson!" Twilight shouted in surprise."Can you believe it? According to this scroll, there are people watching us!"
"Yeah, I know." Thompson replied, still being incredibly nonchalant.
"Wait, what do you mean you know?" Twilight said, confused.
"I mean I've been holding on to this information for two years! Nothing surprises me anymore! In fact, the only thing I can think of that could surprise me is if a pair of boobs appeared out of nowhere and tried to kill us or something!" Thompson chuckled to himself at this thought, but stopped when he heard a shattering noise in the distance followed by a voice.
"I AM DAN. LEAVE NOW OR I WILL CRUSH YOU." It proclaimed.
"Huh, waddaya know? Turns out I can predict the future, eh? EH?" Thompson said, ridiculously exaggerating his words. As he did this, although nopony could hear it, Equestria was filled with the sound of the fourth wall crying out in pain. The source of this crying was our man.
"What the fuck's he doing? He's going to murder my fanfic! And don't be going saying to yourself 'why can't you just delete him hurrrr durrrrrrr?' Well, the answer is simple, HE'S BROKEN MY FLIPPING KEYBOARD. I CANNOT CONTROL HIM ANYMORE. JESUS CHRIST, I HATE THIS GUY." He shouted into his camera as he read what Thompson was doing."I need a drink, be back in a mo." He said as he got up and walked into his kitchen. Meanwhile, Thompson was still trying to be humorous with everypony.
"You get what I mean, right? I said about...giant....tits and then.....they...........Never mind." He said, realising the awkwardness of the situation.
"What are y'all talkin' about?" Asked Applejack, voicing the collective opinion of the group.
"Erm, nothing, erm." Thompson said nervously."uuuuu-Look! A huge distracting thing!" He shouted, pointing to some unimportant corner of the room. As the others stared at this corner, trying to find something of significance, a bright flash filled the room and when it cleared Thompson was back in the everfree forest.
"Right then, new situation time. Where to go now?" He asked himself.
"How about nowhere? Just get back to letting me control your life!" The man shouted at his computer screen, but it was to no avail. Thompson was out of his hands now.

Comments

[Keaton_FlutterDerp]

I
LOVE
IT.

[Kamylian]

This is the most tripped out, batshit insane fic I've ever read.

It's freakin' awesome

[datdamnface]

and I thought I was insane