Put on your Robe(s) and/or Wizard Hat(s)

by Fiddlove Enfemme

Chapter Five: Settling In

Green immediately walked up to the confused unicorn and offered his hand for a handshake. "How do you do? My name is Green. These are my friends."

"Uh, what? What even? Who-?" Twilight sputtered.

Not taking no for an answer, Green snatched up Twilight's left foreleg and shook it with a firm grip. Turning to his two friends who remained outside, he introduced them. "This is Yellow. He can be a little dim sometimes, but he's a great guy to know!"

Yellow meekly held up his hand and said "Hi."

"And this cheerful guy is Blue. He's good with numbers.

Blue gestured respectfully, saying "Salutations, Alicorn."

"And the fellow who rudely stepped passed you is-"

"Let me guess," Twilight interjected, "Is he named Red or something?"

"That's right! How did you know?" Green said in surprise.

"Educated guess, I guess..." Twilight trailed off.

"Nothing anyone with two braincells to rub together couldn't figure out. An oversimplified system, really. The visible spectrum only offers so much variety." Blue babbled.

"It's over, Equestria's finished!" Flash Sentry exclaimed.

"Why would that be, anonymous Royal Guard?" Green asked.

"See? That's how they get you! Worm their way into your head, make you think they're harmless! I know the truth! You'll be the doom of Equestria if you stay here any longer!" he shouted.

"This horse has blown a gasket!" Yellow shouted in response.

Flash took one look at Yellow, and was frightened into a run. "You'll never take me alive again!" he yelled as he ran off into the wilderness.

"What's his problem?" Twilight asked.

"No idea." said Green as he shook his head.

---

After all the luggage had been packed away, and the last of the Castle Canterlot staff sent home safe, the four wizards prepared for their first day of ruling the land of magical ponies. Blue had reasoned that the quartet should acquaint themselves with the local populace. Namely, Twilight's circle of friends within Ponyville. This consisted of several ponies, chief among them being Rarity, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, and Fluttershy. All the rest are background characters who will never be named or relevant other than to die for no reason other than creation of tension.

"Alright gang, time to roll out!" said Yellow cheerfully.

"Is that from Scooby Doo or the Autobots?" asked Red

Blue once again pushed a pair of nonexistent glasses up his nose as he snidely remarked "Technically, it's a combination of the two phrases from both media sources. Simply put, from both."

"Hey Blue, got any more jerkass remarks hidden under those nonexistent glasses? Cause I'd love to see you come up with a worse one." Red barked.

Green simply shook his head "Rude, the both of you should be ashamed of your argument."

"Well, Green Goblin, what do you suggest we do? Dig a hole and jump in?" Red complained.

"We need to focus here. The integrity of the realm is depending on us!" Green said in a heroic voice as he raised his fist.

"We're starting with Rarity, right?" asked Red as he took out a list of names.

"Nah, Rainbow Dash is a safer bet. Clothes and wizards do not go along well, as you should know!" Blue chided.

"I want a challenge! After dealing with the clothes, the others will be a cakewalk!" Red declared.

"I want to go meet Pinkie Pie. Just so you know, my opinion matters too, guys." Yellow squawked.

"Then the vote is settled. We go visit Fluttershy first." Blue concluded.

A collective "What?" rose up from the other three wizards.

"Fluttershy offers the best solution to the argument. Nobody is satisfied, and therefore we should begin with her."

"Yeah, well what about this Applejack character?" asked Green.

"We probably met her during the caravan stop at the Apple's farm." Blue informed.

"Then let's get it over with!" shouted Red as he led the way towards the edge of town where the hermitic yellow pegasus dwelled.

Somehow, the four wizards managed to get to Fluttershy's house without killing anyone, but a few houses looked in need of repair (and some didn't exist anymore, but let's overlook that for now). Tentatively, Blue tread the steps toward the front door, thinking that a sneaky entrance would be important. Preparing to breach the door, he took up position on one side of the front door. Red followed suit on the other side. Blue performed a series of hand movements, including a circle, some kind of wave or zigzag effect, and finally a fist smacking into a palm.

Blue, confused, stepped away from the side of the door in shock, "I have no idea what that means. You are following none of the established motions or signals from the various-"

"On it." Yellow said to Red as he cut off Blue's spiel.

Yellow ran up to the door, counted to three as Red braced against the wall, and kicked in the door. "Breaching, breaching!" he shouted, bursting into the building. "On the ground, now! All of you!" he yelled at several animals that were currently visiting Fluttershy's house. "Move, move, secure that doorway!" he told Red as he pointed at a door to an adjacent room. Charging over to the dining table, he flipped the table onto its side, disregarding the tea set ready and waiting. <CRASH!> The teapot shattered into a million pieces as it hit the floor, spilling hot tea, which was then followed by several cups, spoons, the milk ewer, and the sugar dish. Taking cover behind the overturned table, he sprinted to the aforementioned doorway, then burst through it as well, disregarding the shouts of Blue and Green.

Inside the next room, one rather angry looking rabbit was sitting in the middle of a large bed. It took one look at the two wizards that stormed the room, and then leaped off the bed, running for a large mouse hole in the wall. "Stop that hare!" shouted Red. Yellow leaped in front of the rabbit, blocking its path. Seeing the wizard, it turned 180 degrees and ran under the bed. "We have you surrounded, come out with your paws up!" yelled Red, as he and Yellow positioned themselves on opposite sides of the bed. Just as he'd predicted, the rabbit raced out from under the bed on the side they had left exposed. It dashed for the door.

"I've got it now!" said Yellow as he charged up a spiked boulder flinging spell, and aimed it at the retreating rabbit. Blue and Green had almost reached the doorway, when with a <PHOOMPH-CLACK! not unlike a foam dart launching air compression weapon, the boulder crashed through the doorway. Green had somehow managed to dodge out of the way, but Blue was rolled over into a wizard-shaped pancake.

"Yellow! You killed Blue," screamed Green in disbelief as he clambered to his feet, "We've got to Res him!"

Red punched Yellow in the face and chided, "Damnit Yellow! How could you have missed the rabbit? HE WAS FIVE BLOODY FEET IN FRONT OF YOU!"

"It's not MY fault that Blue got in the way of the boulder!" Yellow declared, "Hurry, let's go after the rabbit!"

"But what about Blue?" asked Green.

"No time, that rabbits getting away!" shouted Red.

"Guys, it's a rabbit! What does it have to do with anything?" Green asked - but the other two had already chased the rabbit into the forest. Frustrated, discouraged, and defeated, Green sat down on one of the chairs next to the overturned table and tea set. Half heartedly, he picked up the teapot, and went to make some tea.

---

Now, you could probably guess that Fluttershy wasn't home for the "Wizard War on Rabbits", as the quartet would call it afterward. She was, in fact, out getting groceries. But, as Angel Bunny was being pursued by the Yellow and Red wizards, Fluttershy was walking home along her forest trail.

But something was amiss.

All of a sudden, she stopped, cold. The chatter of animals that could normally be heard near her home was absent, no birds chirping, no mice scurrying, beavers chewing, bears scavenging, rabbits, weasels, otters, or even butterflies. All was deathly quiet.

Her instincts screamed at her to run and hide, to find where the animals had gone and console them, to change her name and move to a new town and avoid all contact with her previous friends. But no, the training of Iron Will asserted itself, and she...well...asserted herself. Head held high, she bravely trotted up to her house. But suddenly, the assertiveness of her assertive training asserted itself no longer, and she let out a decidedly unassertive squeak. For the scene that beheld her was frightful indeed.

Her door had been broken in, and still hung askew from a single hinge while it swung menacingly. Just inside and to the right, a large and oddly familiar blood covered boulder had come to a rest embedded in her wall. All across the floor there were chunks of wood, plaster, and broken china. A green robed figure was sitting in one of her dining chairs while sipping from the only surviving tea cup, next to her overturned dining table and tea set. Worst of all, a dead thing in a blue robe was lying, crushed to death by a large round object.

Fluttershy took in all this madness, at first not believing what she saw thinking it was a hallucination. But even after repeatedly rubbing her eyes, pinching herself (without fingers, I might add), tapping her hooves together three times then saying "There's no place like home, There's no place like home, There's no place like home.", she realised it was not a hallucination.

She let out what could be described as the quietest scream to ever occur.

As if a spell had been broken, the green robed figure looked up from its tea, did a double take, spat out the mouthful it had just sipped, and stood. It walked, slowly, menacingly, and raised two mismatched appendages over its round head. Alarmingly, the ends of the limbs flipped around and attached to its back, leaving two smaller arms. Near paralysed, Fluttershy slowly backed away from the thing. The menacingly menacing figure menacingly walked towards her, an aura of menace around it.

"Sorry about the mess. Are you Fluttershy?" a voice asked apologetically.

"Y-yes." she said, barely registering on the scale of sound.

"Would you speak a little louder, sweetie? I couldn't hear that."

"Y-yes, I am Fluttershy" she said, almost within hearing range.

"Gonna have to be louder than that."

"I am Fluttershy, yes." she said in the barest whisper.

"Louder. Louder, louder louder! Speak at the same volume I am speaking at." the voice said at a volume slightly higher than the conversational tone between friends.

"Yes, I am Fluttershy!" she said, finally at a volume close to normal.

"Alright, can you keep that tone at a constant, or will we have to go through this every time we talk?"

"No..." she said, slightly quieter.

"You've got to say a little more than 'No', Fluttershy."

"We won't have to do this again, no." she said, becoming more confident.

"Glad that's settled. I'm Green." The creature, from whom Fluttershy had ascertained the voice was coming from, stepped forward. It lifted one of its limbs, and held it out towards her. She shied away, not sure of the implications. The creature, Green, grabbed up one of her front hooves, and firmly shook it. "Sorry about the mess. Two of my friends, Red and Yellow, went crazy chasing after a rabbit, or hare, or bunny, or something like it. Accidentally killed my other friend, Blue here on the ground. Which reminds me," he removed one of the items from his back, a large bough with leaves growing on it, "I've got to revive him. Excuse me."

Green stepped away from Fluttershy, dusting his staff of plaster, and a globule phased into existence near his head, then gravitated towards his staff. It glowed a smooth green, occasionally letting a piece of green vegetation fall from it. Another globule formed, this one crackling with electrical energy. Thrusting the staff into the air, the two globules coalesced. A beam of light came down from above, through a hole in Fluttershy's roof that had been made during the kerfuffle earlier, striking the ground. A fully clothed blue wizard erupted from the ground, wielding the basic staff and blunt sword.

"What took you so long, Green?"

Author's Note:

Magick! Get!

Also, here's a nice, heft chapter for you.