"Have ya gone plumb insane?!"
My ears drooped as I overheard Applejack let into her little sister.
"But we only wanted ta help Candy earn her cutie mark!" a cringing Apple Bloom whined.
"An' where do ya reckon that says yer senses hafta pack up and fly out yer ears?!"
"I'm sorry, Applejack. We didn't mean no harm. We didn't know changelings can k-kill ponies."
"That's not even the dang point!" Applejack snapped. "Changelings are dangerous, period. Ya might as well have gone after some wanted outlaw."
I sighed and turned away, sweeping my gaze over the others. When I had led the Crusaders out of the forest, all hell -- or rather, Tartarus -- had already broken loose. Twilight and her friends had already arrived, and the Ponyville sheriff had not been far behind.
I couldn't find Scootaloo. Earlier, a pegasus mare had swooped down on the little orange filly, berated her, then picked an argument with Rainbow Dash. Now a sullen Rainbow hovered off to the side with her forelegs folded over her chest. Scootaloo and the mare were nowhere to be seen.
My heart skipped a beat as my eyes beheld Rarity. Near her was an elegant sofa she had somehow conjured apparently just to faint upon after hearing what the Crusaders had tried to do. Now she loomed over poor Sweetie Belle, who cast her gaze downward. Even Pinkie Pie was frowning at her. That had to feel bad.
I took a deep breath and trotted over, my ears already swiveling towards Rarity's voice. "... done some strange things in the past, but words truly fail me this time. Honestly, Sweetie Belle, what were you thinking? Were you thinking at all?"
"We just wanted to help," Sweetie said in a tiny voice.
"And how was risking your lives supposed to accomplish this?"
Sweetie's eyes shifted towards me for a moment. "We thought Candy could handle it. We thought she had fought them before."
"Regardless of what you believed, it seemed you didn't consider your promise to me."
Sweetie Belle's gaze snapped up. "I kept my promise! Really, I did!"
Pinkie narrowed her eyes. "Just barely! You found all sorts of clever ways to skirt around that Pinkie Promise, missy!" She looked thoughtful for a moment before smiling at Rarity. "I was kinda impressed, to be honest. I'm almost surprised she didn't earn a cutie mark from it!"
Rarity rolled her eyes at Pinkie. "To borrow a line from my sister: not helping."
"Rarity, I'm sorry!" Sweetie cried. "Scootaloo had kinda exaggerated things a bit, and we thought--"
"Yes, I know all about how Rainbow filled that filly's head with nonsense about fighting changelings, but that's beside--"
Rainbow Dash zipped over to us. "Hey! Don't go blaming me for this! I've had enough of ponies yelling at me today. I never said anything to Scoots about Candy fighting changelings."
Rarity frowned. "Fine. My apologies."
I started to back away.
Rarity suddenly whirled around and glared at me. "And where do you think you're going?"
I blinked. "Er, huh?"
She stepped up to me. "I am quite disappointed in you, Candy."
My ears drew back. "What?? Wait, how is this my fault?!"
"If anypony here knows what can go wrong when they withhold information, it would be you."
I stared, dumbfounded. "You're kidding, right?"
"You knew Sweetie Belle and her friends were up to something. Really, you should've been alerted as soon as it became clear that their intent was to hunt and capture some creature, regardless of whether you knew they were after a changeling specifically."
"Wait a minute!" I protested, though I couldn't help but cringe a bit. "I had no idea! I'm new here, remember? As in new to this world!"
"New to this world?" Sweetie Belle repeated in confusion. "What's she talking about?"
"All the more reason you should've asked for clarification when it was clear you didn't understand," said Rarity. "Now I know--"
"But, wait, I--!"
"Don't. Interrupt."
My mouth snapped shut, my eyes wide.
Rarity sighed. "As I was about to say ... I know you're new here, Candy, and I'm trying to be sympathetic to that." She glanced to the side. "And I suppose some good did come of this."
I heard Sweetie Belle gasp, and I followed both ponies' gazes. My breath caught in my throat as two nurse ponies held a stretcher between them, on which lay Strong Wing. He had been removed from the cocoon, though green goo still clung to his fur and dripped to the ground as he was carried to a waiting wagon.
Rarity's voice drew my attention again. "From what you've told me, things are similar enough across both worlds that you should've at least questioned more closely what the Crusaders were doing. Certainly you know by now we wouldn't have judged you for your lack of knowledge."
Only stubbornness drove further protest in my head as if answering some inherent need to be contrary. Admittedly, a reflex attitude of "who the hell does she think she is" fueled much of my remaining vitriol. Well, I had the answer to that: she was my fosterer. Or would be, if the bureaucracy would cooperate.
What I didn't want to admit was that she was an adult, and I was the stupid kid. I had said I wanted to know what it was like to be an ordinary teenager. Unfortunately, that meant they sometimes thought they had all the answers and did dumb things. I supposed I had finally achieved a goal of sorts, then. Yay for me.
I lowered my gaze. "I'm sorry, Rarity."
"I know you meant well," Rarity said in a gentler voice. "And I'm happy to see you making friends. Just don't be afraid to question what they're doing if you think it's at all suspicious or dangerous."
I raised my eyes enough to see Sweetie Belle giving me a look that was sympathetic, but intensely curious as well.
I heard hoof-falls behind me. "Um, sorry to bother you," came Fluttershy's soft voice. "But Twilight wanted to talk to Candy when she has a moment."
I flicked my gaze downward again and lowered my head slightly. "I guess that depends on Rarity."
Rarity touched her hoof under my muzzle and gently lifted my head. "Go see what Twilight wants. I've said my piece. Just please try to use your head a little more."
I struggled against the lingering instinct that only I knew what was good for me. In the perfect, rational world, Rarity made absolute sense; I should have thought things through. I didn't have the fear of secrets being revealed to fall back on as an excuse. Despite the fact that a purpose had been served -- finding the real Strong Wing -- that had been little more than a happy accident.
So I wanted to believe at the time.
I gave Rarity a small and somewhat forced smile before turning away.
"I'm sure she's not that upset with you," Fluttershy said.
"I think she is," I said in a low voice.
"Well, um, maybe, but it won't last long. She really does care for you."
Would my own mother have reacted any differently? I wanted to think that she would have called me out on my shit just as effectively, which made me feel worse for screwing up.
"I know she does," I said in a quavering voice. I lifted my head. Twilight stood near the wagon as the nurses loaded Strong Wing inside. "I just have a lot to learn, that's all."
Fluttershy smiled. "Maybe the books Twilight gave you can help with that."
Unfortunately, some things I couldn't learn from a book. Like maturity.
The nurses climbed into the wagon. The two stallions hitched to it immediately set out, breaking into a full gallop when they reached the road back into Ponyville. Sunlight glinted from the pendant as Twilight turned towards us, and I struggled not to avert my eyes.
"The nurses said they believe Strong Wing will recover," said Twilight.
"Oh, thank goodness," Fluttershy said with a relieved sigh.
"He was drained quite a bit, but he's no worse off than Nurse Redheart was when she was found." Twilight turned to me. "Candy, you might be wondering how we got here so fast."
"Yeah, I was, but I can guess," I said. "The pendant, right?"
Twilight approached me. "It happened while I was performing the experiment I told you about yesterday. It fired a burst of magical energy towards the White Tail Woods. When I remembered you telling me that you and the Crusaders would be here this morning, I gathered my friends and we headed right over."
"So the pendant was responsible for what I saw?" I asked in a tense voice.
"So you did see something!" Twilight cried, and for just a moment, I resented her excitement. "What was it?"
In a halting voice, I described the apparition of Michelle.
"Oh, no," Fluttershy said in a hushed voice. "Candy, I-I'm so sorry you had to see her again like that."
"But it wasn't her!" I snapped. Fluttershy drew her ears back. I sighed and lowered my voice. "Sorry. It was just another stupid image that Starswirl's avatar used." I looked at Twilight. "Wasn't it?"
Twilight hesitated. "Well ... that's one theory, of course."
My heart raced, "B-but that had to be it. She even spoke archaic Equestrian, like you told me about in your dream. What else could it be?"
Twilight did not respond at first, and my blood ran cold.
"Twilight?" Fluttershy prompted softly. "Is something wrong?"
"No, it's fine," Twilight said, but her quavering voice said differently. She looked at me and sighed. "Candy, I'm not sure how to put this. I'm not completely sure myself what it means."
I simply stared, not trusting my voice.
"I only had a few moments to study that burst of magic," said Twilight. "But the pattern was very different from what I had sensed from Starswirl's avatar."
I swallowed hard, my tight throat clicking.
"It's possible there's a second entity in the pendant."
Fluttershy's pupils shrank to points.
"I-it's not her," I croaked.
"I'm not saying it is," Twilight said.
"It can't be her!"
"It probably isn't, but I won't know until I study the pendant more to--"
"My friend is dead!"
"I know," Twilight said in a very soft voice.
"Y-you said yourself, not even Starswirl could figure out how to do something like that!"
Twilight placed a hoof on my shoulder. "Candy, calm down, please. You're jumping to conclusions."
Fluttershy trembled. "B-but what if Cherry r-really is ...!"
I clenched my teeth to suppress the impulse to scream at her. I took a few deep breaths. Fine, I was a teenager again. That didn't mean I had to act like an angst machine or lash out at ponies who were trying to help. "I-I'm sorry, Twilight. I just ... I just want to put this all behind me, and all it wants to do is pull me in again."
"Candy, I really debated whether to tell you this," said Twilight.
I quelled the impulse to demand why she insisted on torturing me with this knowledge. "S-so what does this mean? Is there some sort of ... o-of avatar of Cherry in there?"
Twilight gave Fluttershy and I a perplexed look. "Cherry?"
"We came up with that name for my friend," I said. "Closest word in Equestrian that reminded me enough of her so I could give her a name."
Twilight smiled. "It sounds nice. But, yes, that's one explanation."
"So now what?" I demanded. "Is this thing going to keep torturing me like this?"
Fluttershy gave me a confused look. "But didn't she help you?"
"Yes, she did, I'm not denying that," I said in more of a curt voice than I had intended. "But seeing her constantly makes it harder for me to get over her passing."
"I believe the only reason she was able to appear to you is because of the energy I infused into the pendant," said Twilight in a contrite voice. "I had no idea this was going to happen. I'm not going to do it again without your consent."
I doubted I could make any sort of responsible decision. If it were up to me, I would have the pendant destroyed outright, if that were even possible. Maybe I should've done that from the beginning, or at least tried.
"What I'm more concerned about right now is the changeling," said Twilight. "My brother had swept the White Tail Woods just the day before. It took powerful illusion magic to conceal that camp."
I trembled. "But that changeling ... the one that killed Cherry ... was supposed to be good at magic, right?"
"Yes, but it supposedly entered the transport circle with Chrysalis after the summit. I had checked that circle myself before dispelling it. It had definitely taken two beings beyond the bounds of Equestria, and Rainbow and the Wonderbolts had seen Chrysalis and another changeling enter." She frowned. "Unless the second changeling went with Chrysalis instead somehow. That might explain why the vision referred to the changeling specifically as, um, Cherry's killer."
"Twilight?" Fluttershy said in a tentative voice. "From what Candy said, it sounded like the changeling was trying to lead them somewhere."
Twilight sighed. "Yes, I know."
"So how did Sweetie Belle find the camp if even Shining Armor couldn't?" I demanded.
Fluttershy gasped. "Unless S-Sweetie Belle is really a--!"
I held up a hoof. "No, Fluttershy, it's okay. The Crusaders had come up with code words to check for that sort of thing." Which, in retrospect, I had to admit was damn clever.
"And I scanned each of the Crusaders and Candy earlier," said Twilight. "None of them are changelings."
I gave her a surprised look. "You did? I didn't even notice."
Twilight smiled. "I've enhanced the spell. Now it gives me purely magical rather than visual feedback, so I can cast it without anypony seeing it."
As much as I wanted to deny the most important problem of all, Fluttershy had already broached the topic. "What about what Fluttershy said, that it was leading me somewhere? What exactly was it trying to do?"
I didn't really expect a definite answer, as much as my mind screamed for one. Twilight had little more than I did: a bunch of possibilities, none of which were very pleasant to contemplate.
"I don't know, Candy, I'm sorry," Twilight said. "Little about this makes sense. For now, I think we should get back to Ponyville. That's the safest place right now."
I sighed as I glanced at the White Tail Woods. I had hoped to escape the constant fear that had felt like a riptide trying to drown me no matter how hard I had fought against it. So the first attempt on my life hadn't been enough for that horrible thing? As much as I wanted to blame the pendant for bringing me here, the incident in the alley wouldn't have happened if I had not been set up. I had not wanted to think too hard on it for fear of my screwed-up head using it to fuel renewed resentment over winding up in Equestria, but I wasn't stupid. Who better to set me up than a creature who could make itself look exactly like me?
Why couldn't it just leave me alone? I wasn't even wearing the pendant anymore! Unless this was some sort of revenge for crossing Queen Chrysalis.
I headed back to Ponyville with the others. I tried to console myself with the fact that this time I didn't have to simply wallow in my emotions like I had before. This time I could call on somepony for help.
Though at that moment, it made me feel no less scared.
"Um, Candy?" said a contrite little country drawl behind me as the boutique came within sight. "Ya got a minute?"
I suppressed a sigh and turned around. All three Crusaders were together again, though Scootaloo looked particularly glum. Behind her hovered Rainbow Dash, a stern look on her face, her forelegs crossed. "What is it, girls?"
Apple Bloom glanced at the others before she stepped up to me. "I jus' wanna say I'm sorry fer the trouble we caused ya."
Sweetie Belle stepped next to her friend. "I'm sorry, too, Candy. I didn't realize it would get out of hoof like this."
"Um ... I, uh ..." Scootaloo mumbled, averting her eyes, her ears drooping.
"Go on," Rainbow said, thrusting a hoof forward. "Tell her!"
Scootaloo blushed and stepped forward. "Um ... C-Candy? I, uh, I'm sorry for telling the others you fought changelings when I never actually heard you did."
"We only wanted ta help ya get yer cutie mark, honest!" Apple Bloom said. "I mean, yeah, we kinda hoped we would, too, but we really wanted it ta be 'bout you."
Sweetie Belle gave me a forlorn look. "And I didn't want to see the fostering get messed up. We thought maybe if you had a cutie mark, it would help. And, um ... I was kinda looking forward to having another sister."
Dammit, no children of any world should be so cute, and my heart lurched at Sweetie's words. Why was I such a softie around them? Maybe I felt more affinity for their little circle than I wanted to believe. I still struggled with the idea that I could be so easily accepted.
"It's okay," I said in a quavering voice. "I kinda messed up myself, too."
"Candy, can I ask you something?" Sweetie Belle said.
I knew that was coming. "Sure."
"What was that stuff you said about a new world? Are you from a lot further away than Manehattan?"
I caught movement out of the corner of my eye as Rarity approached. Had she heard Sweetie's question? At my inquisitive look, she nodded. "Go ahead and tell them, if you wish."
I gave her a grateful smile and turned back to Sweetie Belle. "Well, yeah, you could say that. I'm not from Equestria. Or this planet. Before I showed up in Sweet Apple Acres that day, I wasn't even a pony."
All three Crusaders' mouths dropped open, and their pupils shrank. "Wow, really?" Scootaloo said in a hushed voice that sounded more curious than anything else.
"Yeah, really. It's kind of a long story how I got here, but let's just say this little trip wasn't exactly planned."
"Is that why yer sixteen an' ya don't have no cutie mark?" Apple Bloom asked.
"Maybe. I don't know. I'm still learning how this place works. Maybe it means I'll never get one."
"But that's just not fair!" Scootaloo cried. "Why turn you into a pony and not let you get a cutie mark?"
I smiled faintly. "I appreciate your concern, Scootaloo, but--"
"Now we really do gotta help ya!" Apple Bloom cried.
My smile faded. "Girls, please ..."
Scootaloo grinned and fluttered her wings. "Yeah, we should go back to the clubhouse right now and figure out something else for her to do!"
Sweetie Belle face-hoofed. "Um, Scootaloo? Our punishments, remember?"
Scootaloo's grin faded. "Oh, yeah, right."
I turned to Sweetie Belle. "Punishments?"
"We're all grounded for two weeks," Sweetie explained.
"Can't we appeal?" Scootaloo said.
Apple Bloom frowned. "Applejack said I either get grounded now or miss goin' ta the rodeo. I ain't missin' that! 'Specially since I was gonna invite y'all to go along with me."
Sweetie Belle trotted up to me. "I actually don't mind being grounded. It'll give me a chance to get to you know you better."
I tilted my head. "Really? After learning I'm an alien?"
Sweetie smiled. "Sure! You can tell me about your world, and I can tell you about Equestria."
Scootaloo suddenly rushed towards me. "Oh! In your world, do you have, like, giant claws or antennae that shoot lightning bolts?"
I blinked. "What?? No, I--"
"Or mebbe legs that end in suckers instead of hooves so ya can climb up walls!" piped Apple Bloom. "What 'bout those?"
"Um, no, I was nothing like--"
"Oo, I know!" Sweetie Belle cried. "Maybe she has lots of tentacles that can hold a dozen objects so she can do lots of things at once!"
Apple Bloom smiled. "She'd find her cutie mark in no time if she could do that!"
I face-hoofed. "Girls ..."
"Or she uses them to beat up a dozen bad guys at once while she fights crime!" Scootaloo cried.
"Ohmygosh, that would be sooo cool!" Rainbow Dash suddenly chimed in. "Just like the character that Daring Do teamed up with when Ahuizotl stole the priceless sapphire that turned out to be the power core of the alien's ship that she needed to ... um ... er ..."
Both Rarity and I had narrowed our eyes at Rainbow.
Rainbow smiled faintly and rubbed her mane. "Heh. Sorry."
I sighed and stepped towards the three fillies. "Listen to me, please. I was actually pretty ordinary back on my own world. And as for this one, well ..." I slowly smiled. "I really appreciate what you tried to do for me. But, honestly? Getting a cutie mark is just not a big priority for me right now. I've kinda got a lot of other things to worry about first." I lifted a hoof and glanced at it, smirking. "Like, you know, being a pony?"
Had anything I said made any sort of sense? Would they reject me and repudiate my membership in their little club? What did it say about me that I actually worried that I'd be excluded from a societal circle comprised of little kids who had more ambition than they had sense?
The Crusaders exchanged glances, and I could only guess as to the meaning of their thoughtful looks. I had known them for only a few days, but already I sensed it could mean anything from simple puzzlement to wild scheming. My tail twitched when my mind gravitated more towards the latter.
Apple Bloom and Scootaloo finally turned to Sweetie Belle, smiling. As if receiving some sort of unspoken message from her friends, she nodded once and turned to me. A smile graced her muzzle as well as she said, "Maybe we can help you with that, too. Being a pony, that is."
Scootaloo nodded. "Yeah, I mean, how hard can that be, right? We do it every day."
Apple Bloom grinned and waved a hoof. "Bein' a pony is as easy as fallin' off a log, trust me. You'll learn it it no time with our help!"
I couldn't help it. I burst out giggling. The Crusaders laughed as well.
And don't think I didn't notice that "too" you tacked on to your first statement, Sweetie Belle, you sneak. Getting them to stop scheming to help me earn my cutie mark likely had about as much chance of happening as asking the sun not to rise in ... that is ... as convincing Princess Celestia not to raise the sun the next morning.
Perhaps Rarity had noticed as well, as she gave me a sympathetic look.
"Scoots, we better get going," Rainbow Dash said. "I promised your parents you wouldn't be gone long." She rolled her eyes. "I'd rather not be yelled at again."
"I better head back to the farm," said Apple Bloom. "Seeya in two weeks, Crusaders!"
I smiled when her gaze included me as well. Was that a silly thing to be happy about?
Rarity stepped over to me as Apple Bloom and Scootaloo headed off. "I'm sorry if I seemed a bit harsh with you earlier, Candy."
I let my gaze linger on the departing fillies for another moment before turning to Rarity. "No, it's fine. You were right, I should've been thinking a little more clearly." I paused. "Does this mean I get punished, too?"
Rarity smiled. "Perhaps not, but I just may work you a little harder in the boutique for the next two weeks."
"Don't worry, Candy," said Sweetie Belle. "I'll be right there for moral support, just like in the forest earlier."
Rarity eyed her. "You mean you'll be working right alongside her."
Sweetie blinked. "I did? Um ... yeah, I guess I did."
I smiled at her. "You can help me with my magic."
"I was wondering why you were only learning that now. Is that because you came from another world?"
"Yeah. It's completely new to me. My world doesn't actually have any magic."
Sweetie gasped, but then narrowed her eyes. "Okay, now you're just having fun with me."
I giggled. "No, seriously. I'll see if I can explain it to you later."
"Well, anyway, I'm glad you're here. I really hope that mean old Spoiled Rich doesn't ruin it."
"Enough about that," said Rarity. "I don't want either of you worrying about it. Now, let's head home. It's not even afternoon and it already feels like it's been a trying day."
After my experience in the White Tail Woods, the idea of calling someplace "home" appealed to me far more than ever before. Since arriving in Equestria, I had needed a place I could feel safe, emotionally as well as physically. The castle had served the latter but not so much the former. I needed the former much more desperately than I had wanted to admit.
I hadn't dared to allow myself to feel safe since Michelle died. Maybe the changeling's mental block had never been complete. Maybe I always had a feeling I was in some sort of danger and didn't want it to affect anyone else. Yet I couldn't let my fear of bringing danger to others paralyze me further.
I had to trust that others knew what they were doing when I didn't.
I really don't want to know what the CMC have planned... Aw what the heck, I'm looking forward to this!
Close enough
Honestly Candy didn't deserve a talk like that. She doesn't know the CMC. YOU RARITY DO AND LET THIS HAPPEN!
7123721 Agreed.
And if I were to look after kid I don't really know, in a place supposedly safe, I too would have choose the "wait and see" politic when choosing whether or not I should stop things.
7123721 I think the elements, and Ponyville in general, have gotten so used to the crazy that is they forget other beings don't see the CMC brand of crazy coming till there hit with it.
That being said they need to sit her down and explain some thing to her. Everfree forest, weekly disasters, Twilight going necrotic.. you know. things any Ponyville resident should watch out for.
7123765 something that should have been done earlier. especially if they were suspicious of them.
I don't think anything could stop the Crusaders from scheming...
7123868 Oh really? Hey Pinkie, ready the Tower of Delight!!!!
7123721 That's a horrible excuse.
She was suspicious as hell of what they were doing but never decided to put her foot down and ask for answers until it was too late. They were clearly skirting promises and withholding information.
That's on her.
7124012 she didn't know them. However the mane six do and Especially Rarity. So the blame lies with them as much as the CMC then Candy.
What would a cutie mark in skirting a Pinkie Promise look like?
7124050 It doesn't matter if its the CMC. You could substitute them with three random children from Iowa and it wouldn't mean anything.
They were doing something that were setting off warning flags in her own head and she did not put her foot down and demand what they were doing despite the increasing feelings of suspicion.
She was the closest thing to an adult and basic common sense and responsibility should've kicked in. Some of the blame lies on her for being basically passive until things got of hand.
7124119 she did try as a reasonable person could. Rarity in the others however DO KNOW THE CMC AND THEIR ANTICS. THey have to hold themselves responsible as well.
7124186 No. No she didn't. She practically let herself be steamrolled into it easier than Fluttershy.
You can yell this as much as you want but its not going to change the fact that Candy did not speak up and put her foot down when red flags went up in her head and allowed it to go on farther than it should have been.
7124074
A balloon from Pinkies cutie mark with a skirt.
7124243 Again she doesn't know how bad the CMC can get. And notice she did try but the CMC very quickly brushed it off and not even allow her to finish.
Again the mane 6 know the CMC and should have laid down the law better.
7124276
Which. does. not. matter.
You see suspicious behaviour in children. Put her foot down and demand the information.
She's. 16.
The girls are like 8-10. Twelve at most.
Which does not change Candy's inability to speak up and law down the law herself when she clearly knew she should've.
You can try and deflect the blame away from Candy as much as you want and you're doing it really hard but her passiveness is on her head and allowed the situation to get farther than it should have.
7124334 Yeah a 16 year old who has gone through a lot of crap in her life and especially recently. And also new to a world she has only been in for what a week at most.
The Sisters and Rainbow should have stressed that a bit more and note they were suspious of the CMC and did nothing either. So what is Candy supposed to do in that situation. Everypony told her Whitetail was safe. She had no idea what the CMC wanted to do till they got in it and it seemed that the mane 6 weren't to concern ofver the adventure. Candy is the last to take any blame in this incident. First being the CMC then second Rarity, Applejack, and Rainbow Dash.
7124383
And this means she can't tell 3 little girls "no"?Or ask "What are you girls looking for in the woods?". Keep on trying to deflect.
All of this irrelevant and once against trying to deflect blame. This has nothing to do with Candy's inability to speak up and put a stop to red flag behaviors.
Doesn't matter whether or not she's first or last. She was part of the problem because of her inaction.
Candy was one of the people who fucked up in this situation. Not the only one but she did. End of story.
7124402 she did try and had to chase them a couple of times.
Honestly, you know the CMC. What chances did she actually have in containing them?
7124417 It doesn't help that Candy seems to be an extreme pushover. She barely attempted to defend herself, and since she seems to have as much authority in her demeanor as Fluttershy, the CMC will probably always ignore her, as they tend to live in their own little world.
I am with you that Rarity should not have been as angry with her, since Rarity herself had asked Sweetie Bell many times to verify the CMC wasn't up to no good. Even went as far as to explain to Candy how the Pinkie Promise works. Really, all the adults pretty much told Candy she shouldn't have anything to worry about. And who expects 8-10 year old girls to put your life in mortal danger?
7124402
>implying the C.M.C. would have listened
>implying the surreptitious little shits would have given her an honest, straightforward, totally unambiguous answer
>implying you’re not deflecting blame from their guardians’ criminally negligent failure to inform Candy of the exact extent of the C.M.C.’s suicidal lack of foresight, penchant for deception, and preternatural ability to be in precisely the wrong place at the wrong time
The only thing Candy had to go on was that the club of foals known as the Cutie Mark Crusaders were being secretive, and the only sign that it was anything other than trying to surprise her with something was once they were so far into the Whitetail Woods that the only way to inform their guardians of what they were up to would have involved abandoning them — ’cause it aint like those morons would have obeyed any order to take her back to town to tattle on them, now, is it?
How often do kids get into the kind of trouble that the C.M.C. routinely does? Who the hell expects children to go hunting after a bunch of shape shifting emotional vampires that — contrary to the horse shit they spouted to get out of trouble — they knew were dangerous. (They were at the wedding, remember?)
7124515 Bingo. It seems that at least Rainbow got a slight talking too by scoots parents. Rarity was over the line going after Candy who did try a few times to get the girls to stop or maybe even explain what they were doing.
7124515
It does not matter whether or not they would have listened to her.
It is called personal responsibility and you guys are to trying to skirt it away from Candy.
She is a 16 year old girl. She is older than the girls. She is basically the authority figure there. It does not matter if they girls would have or would not have listened the fact is that she did not try to enforce the authority and thus that is where her fault lies in this situation.
She basically went "What are you girls doing?" and when they basically went "don't worry bout" and she let it go. That is irresponsible as hell. Especially considering the whole Changeling thing and the green goo.
If she had actually asserted her authority once in the situation prior to any of that and the girls still refused to listen, then she would have been absolved of all fault. But she did not. Candy has some blame in the situation.
I have to wonder, what if Twilight, Rarity, AJ, and Rainbow had followed the trail and caught a Changeling that was hoping to catch three fillies and not four pissed off mares???? I can just see the Changeling whimpering as they loom above it, especially when they figure out if had bad intentions towards their little sisters. Nice to see Scootaloo has parents who care about her, can we see more of them later on???
7123721 I agree. Rarity dumping just as much blame on Candy is stretching it quite a bit. Candy tried, but she was told the woods were safe, the adult ponies approoved the trip, and for all she knew they were going to play a game in the forest and the net was for a goal.
7123765 Bunny stampedes, mirror clones, plunder vines, Giant Centaur attacks, Bug Bears, manticores, hydras, Pinkie Sense. The list goes on and on.
7124074 an angry Pinkie emoticon???
hmmmmm, is that a thing? I think I've noticed something, but for the sake of spoilers in the comments section I won't mention what it is. Looking forward to the next chapter
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Writing for Scootaloo's family is hard because I am trying to stick to canon as close as possible. Honestly, I wish the writers of FiM would stop leaving it up in the air and give us some idea what her family life is like. At the same time, the whole "Scootadopt" genre is fairly popular. I tried to write the scene such that if it does become canon that she's fostered/adopted/whatever, I only need to tweak the scene to make it work.
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I had a feeling that this scene would produce some debate. All of you present valid points. Let me see if I can describe where I was coming from when writing this scene.
One of the things I am really trying to avoid here with Rachel/Candy is making her a Mary Sue. Mary Sue-ism is not just about having amazing powers, or being the Seventh Element, or having everypony instantly like her and lavish praise on her, or so on. It can be more subtle, such as "give me all the sympathy, I've had a hard life". So I felt that there comes a time where she needs to start to move past that and start shouldering responsibility and not just rely on that sympathy to carry her forward. I even tried to temper Rarity's reaction a bit later in the chapter when she apologizes for being a bit harsh with Candy, not to mention not really giving her any sort of real punishment (being worked harder in the boutique doesn't really qualify as she always enjoys that). So I wanted this to be a sort of growth experience for her.
I also wanted to highlight the fact that Rarity is taking her responsibility towards Candy seriously, that she's not going to get special treatment. Despite everything that's happened to her, Candy is only 16, and she has some growing up to do. Perhaps Rarity is being a bit more strict with her than is warranted, but then again, she hasn't had to deal with a moody teenager before. So in way, they're both learning from this experience.
And, yes, Candy is being a bit of a pushover. She's still trying to figure out when and where to assert herself. This experience will help with that (and she started to learn a bit when she flat out tells the CMC that getting her cutie mark is not a high priority for her. If the CMC doesn't listen ... well, she can only do so much).
I know not everyone will necessarily agree with this approach. This is more to explain where I was coming from on this. I really appreciate all the candid feedback on this chapter.
Wonderful chapter, very slice of life-y. Great characterizations.
I can relate to both sides here since I've tried being in Candy's position but also from experience know exactly what Rarity is feeling (and I could read her parts in her voice). Phase one: being extremely worried. Phase two: being intensely relieved. Phase three: being angry at the culprits for putting you through that emotional roller-coaster and getting themselves in danger because you love them. Phase four:
regretting your harsh words, even if it's just a little, and internally reducing their 'sentence' that you initially wanted to dish out.
Not ominous. Not ominous at all. Good thing she's kept a low profile. Oh, wait.
7125260 I for one find this perfect.
7125260 I get your reasoning, makes sense. I can just see Rarity, AJ, and Rainbow ready to pull out their manes when the CMC are teenagers and they have to be given, "THE TALK".
7125260 But Rarity isn't punishing Candy 'too harshly' she is punishing Candy for doing what Rarity EXPLICITLY ASKED HER TO DO. Rarity encouraged Candy to spend time with the CMC, promsied that the CMC wouldn't do something dangerous due to a quasimagical oath they took and PROMISED whitetail woods would be safe due to guard sweeps of the area. She encouraged Candy to go with them and asked only that she keep them safe if they did something dangerous.
So the CMC did something dangerous and Candy Immediately chased them down and got them to safety. What the Actual Fuck did Rarity want from her? To NOT trust Rarity's promises that it would be safe? To NOT immediately get the CMC out of danger like a responsible adult? To NOT rescue the cocooned Guardpony? All Candy did was follow Rarity's encouragement and SAVE THE CMC, and yet she is being punished for it.
This whole chapter would have been fine, even including Rarity's anger at Candy if instead of Candy folding and blaming herself, like a traumatized and emotionally fragile young mare, that Fluttershy stood up for her and scolded Rarity for lashing out and venting her worries and frustation on Candy for just doing the best she could. It would have ended up with Rarity coming to the realization that taking care of Candy won't be like it is with Sweetie and she will have to step up and grow as a pony to be a good parent, and It would have had Candy coming to the realization that even though there will be arguments, fights, and all round rough patches that Rarity and Fluttershy genuinely care about her.
Instead we got Rarity shouting down a traumatized and vulnerable young mare for being so 'irresponsible' as to listen to Rarity's advice.
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Its like you guys and not actually reading whats being said.
Rarity is scolding her because Candy saw suspicious behavior and barely questioned it. She recognized the girls were withholding information and didn't demand anything.
When red flags went up after seeing the green goo she asked once and this happened:
She basically got cut off and did not press the issue.
She was a passive observer until things got out of hand. She didn't assert herself. That's her part of the blame.
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This part of your comment indeed highlights an oversight on my part. Candy did act responsibly once she realized the danger they were in, and this should have been highlighted by Rarity (or some other pony) in the story. I'm always reluctant to do major rewrites of chapters I have already posted, but the next chapter is still in draft form, and I believe I can revisit this point.
Part of the challenge for me as the writer is trying to make the transition with Candy from someone who is traumatized and vulnerable to someone who is more confident and assertive without it appearing like it happens overnight, as well as what role the other ponies should play. This is why I appreciate candid comments like this one. Thank you for that.
7125495 Rarity is really epitomizing 'pot calling kettle black' if she is pulling out the dangers of withholding information. Candy was suspicious of the CMC and their plans in whitetail woods so she went and asked Rarity. Rarity, instead of explaining that the CMC are a trio of 'rambunctious' fillies that do things like creating mind control poisons and wander into monster filled forests and DO EXCEPTIONALLY DANGEROUS THINGS ALL THE TIME she just waved it away and said their promise to Pinkie was enough and to not worry. Rarity deliberatly decided to not only refrain from explaining the danger of the CMC but instead assuaged her concerns. Rarity's words clearly contributed to Candy just going along because she knew Rarity wanted Candy to go along.
If Candy only knew that the CMC were 'some fillies' that got into 'some trouble' then their wanting their activity a surprise in what was promised, by Rarity, to be a safe and totally non-dangerous forest then there wouldn't be a need to force the issue, because at most it would have been something mildly dangerous like rock climbing or tree climbing or some bullshit. She was kept uniformed of the CMC and their risk because... reasons. Rarity explicitly promised that the CMC wouldn't do something dangerous due to their Pinkie promise so why would Candy force them to explain their plot before entering the 'totally safe' woods?
But nope, Rarity decided that Candy didn't 'need to know' that the CMC were incredibly reckless and dangerous. But bad on Candy for not saying she was an alien, which was clearly directly relevant to playing in the 'totally safe' woods with some 'rambunctious' fillies.
7125507 To be honest, while I do think that Rarity (and the other adults by extension) made mistakes, the scene did not feel too wrong to me.
I doubt that the detail of how the scene in the wood unfolded were told by the kids, Rarity cannot know that Candy did try to be responsible. But she should've at least aknowledged that ultimately, Candy is the one who said "There is a problem, this is not safe, let's get out of here.". She may have realised it too late, but she did in the end. I can understand Rarity scolding Candy under the circumstance (I do not approve, but I understand) and I liked that she choose to make an appology later.
Just, why didn't she just said, "Thank you for getting them out of there."?
7125507 Neato, the chapter as a whole was fine if not for that one part so I'm glad.
Also it would be rather easy to 'run back' Rarity's reaction without doing a rewrite. Fluttershy could pull Rarity to the side and quietly ask if Rarity was sure she was doing the right thing in regards to Candy. It would make a bit of sense that Fluttershy might not butt in and seem like she was undermining Rarity's parenting and instead have a private conversation later. It would give Rarity and Fluttershy a chance to calmly hash out their thoughts once the heat of the moment is gone and decide how to proceed from there. At least I think it would be a smooth transition of paths while still staying in character, but I'm just throwing out thoughts because we are already here talking.
I do look forward to what happens next regardless.
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Yes. The girls didn't tell Candy about the CMCs antics.
Yes the CMC fucked up.
But none of that changes the fact that she did not speak the fuck up.
I've ridden the trains up here on New Jersey and New York hundreds of times before and I know their safe but if I see someone that is clearly showing signs of suspicious behavior and they just happen to leave behind a package and I see it and I don't speak up are you saying some of the blame doesn't lie with me if it turns out horrible?
She has a voice. She needed to use it. Can you imagine if the/a changeling had actually been there? Red flags were going up in her head yet she did not listen to it until they were in too deep.
There is a point where being a passive person goes to far and can lead to getting people getting hurt or worse. She waited too long. Allowed herself to be strung along to far. Did not assert herself when she felt there were things going wrong.
7125556 My point isn't that 'she doesn't speak up to red flags' my point is that 'Those aren't red flags'. Context is important. If a sketchy dude on a subway leaves a bag while glancing around nervously then you need to do run, but if a little girl in her excitement leaves behind her bag then you just need to catch up to her and give it back.
By withholding information on the CMC and how dangerous they are what you and the Mane 6 might see as 'red flags' come of to Candy as 'kids playing'. To Candy they aren't keeping secrets because they are doing something dangerous, they are doing it because they are 8 and wanna have a cool surprise for their new super awesome friend. The promises of Rarity and other created the perspective that Candy viewed the CMC and that perspective was 'makes messes' not 'suicidally reckless'.
Until Candy saw the changeling goo and heard their explicit declaration to hunt changelings she had no reason to think they were doing something any more dangerous than trying to make a rope swing into a river or climbing tall trees. Especially with the explicit promises of the CMC and Rarity that they wouldn't be doing anything dangerous. What reason would Candy have to think they were all lying?
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Which I think you did perfectly well here. And yes, Rarity is the adult. And no, Rarity isn't perfect. That, to me, is actually one of the main appeals of your story - the characters have flaws and make mistakes and can be annoying. They feel real. At first Candy thinks she's being treated unfair after all. Then she veers over into insecure teenager and accepts whats being presented to her.
Next time she might not. She will have grown then.
Tweak the coming chapters if you feel the need, but don't do rewrites where they aren't necessary.
You know, I'm not entirely with the comments complaining about Rarity, but at the same time, Candy did actually ask Twilight if the White Tail Woods were dangerous, and was told no. And told that the Everfree was dangerous, and that she shouldn't go in there. And so she acted on the information given.
Rarity is aware that her sister occasionally does insanely dangerous things. She's aware that Candy is new. She should also have remembered to inform Candy about it. Complaining that Candy didn't pull them out when she realized they were doing dangerous things wouldn't be entirely unfair, except that was what she did do.
On the other hand, cutting her off without letting her explain was the more unforgivable thing in my opinion.
Kinda seeing the point that a lot of people are making comments about how Rarity acted on both her good and bad and it pains me to say this, but I gotta say that at the current moment she reacted normally. Really hate Rarity (she is worst pony for many many reasons), but all the things people talked about that she should have seen like that Candy was uninformed about the level that the CMC go to, the fact that Twilight told them that Whitetail Woods was safe, and that in fact Candy did perfectly fulfill her promise and got them out as soon as she realized the danger are all things that anyone would realize after a long time of cool down; not immediately. Everyone was acting all stressed out in the moment. No one who is ever in change of children or teens ever immediately listens to them when something dangerous happens that is caused by their idiocy. Now once time has passed it will be very obvious to all involved that maybe they should have thought through this all in terms to Candy. It is very probable that they would realize that Candy had done the best in her situation and apologize to her. Also Rainbowdash does need to be apologized to also. People keep forgetting that the characters aren't acting like the reader should see it because they don't have our detachment from the events. They are flawed and acting like we would in the exact situation.
I wonder when she'll make the connection that she really was set up at the very beginning and the changeling was the one who ratted those thugs out to the cops with her form?
If the pendant captures emotion, I wonder if it's an imprint? Some sort of recording device that plays back in your dreams. So the dream she had was one of Michelle's memories of thinking about Rachel. Or something like that. Grasping the peculiar minds of magic artefacts is never cut-and-dry.
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Personally, I think my big problem with Rarity's reaction was the statement that Candy didn't ask for help when she didn't understand something and that specifically because of that there was at least some amount of blame on her.
But that's not true at all.
She did, in fact, ask Twilight if they were taking her to a safe place. She told multiple ponies that she had no idea what the Crusaders had planned. She did everything a reasonable person would do in her situation.
Your explanation for why the characters are acting the way they are makes sense, and I can absolutely understand them reacting emotionally in the moment, but that really doesn't do anything to change my view as an outside observer that the result wasn't at all justified.
I do hope Rachel won't get into the habit of letting Rarity run her life too much. Now, don't get me wrong, it's perfectly adequate and sensible in terms of how many real parent-child relationships work, but I don't think it would be too conductive to the story itself. Protagonists without initiative and a degree of independence just don't make for very good reading. It's more frustrating than entertaining after a point. It would be nice if you kept an eye on that.
Honestly I think my biggest gripe about this whole thing was the way it was presented. Making Rarity a flawed character and having her put too much blame on Candy is fine. Making Candy a flawed character and having her allow herself to be steamrolled by the CMC's extremely excitable personalities is fine. But it felt like the author was biased toward Rarity. It felt like the author was saying, "Rarity was completely right, Candy was completely wrong, end of story." Now, revisiting this issue a bit later is fantastic. But in the here and now, the feel of this chapter bugs me at the end. Rarity's scolding of Candy needed to have a little moral ambiguity, to invoke the idea that either could be right. Everything else about this chapter was fantastic.
I think my biggest gripe with this so far is the fact that Candy is so insistent that the pendant is the cause for all her problems when it is very much apparen that although the pendant was indeed the deciding factor in everything that happened, the entirety of her situation leading up to her being sent to Equestria was entirely orchestrated by the changeling with the scar on its face. At this point I'm not even entirely sure if it works for Chrysalis or if it's following her orders just enough to keep up a ruse of working for her.
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Rachel did specifically ask both Fluttershy and Twilight--with copious mentions of the CMC liberally sprinkled throughout those discussions, so YES, RARITY, SHE ALREADY HAD DONE AS YOU INSTRUCTED BEFORE GOING OUT THERE--so what's your glitch, you stupid white unicorn indigo maned bitch?
If your fellow Bearers didn't pick up on the danger signals, what do you expect the newbie alien to know about their shit?
Damn this story makes me want to strangle all teenagers.
If I were in her position I would be suffering meat withdrawal.
"need . . . . steak . . . . don't care if I get sick, need steak now!"
XD
7170964 Why?