A Heart-to-Heart on Hearth's Warming Eve

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Starlight Glimmer is still getting used to having friends in her life that like her on thir own, but when an old friend from the past comes back into her life, how will she react?

Sunburst is about to find out first hoof how...

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deadpansnarker

deadpansnarker #1 · Dec 7th, 2015 · 3 · ·

he could see the small traces of ears forming in her eyes

You may want to edit that part... It sounds like a bad mutation.
Like what Bill put poor old Preston Northwest through...

Griffin Productions

Griffin Productions #2 · Dec 7th, 2015 · · ·

6706125 Oh god, thanks for pointing that out to me XD

Outa-here

Outa-here #3 · Dec 7th, 2015 · 1 · ·

The snow came down in slow, lulling sheets around Sugarcube Corner

To be clear, snow never falls in sheets. Also, why would it be flowing around Sugarcube Corner and not on it along with the area surrounding that bakery? Also, how can snow be "lulling"? Does Equestrian Snow have the ability to sing lullabyes?

These are just a couple of examples of your baffling descriptions of persons, places and things. I'm pointing them out to you simply because you may wish to rethink the way you describe things.

"The first of the gently falling snow, shifting gracefully on each turn of the soft breeze that moved it, hued all it touched in shades of glistening white". (If it's a night scene you can describe how the snow "gleamed softly in the light of the brightly sparkling stars that hung in the black, velvet sheet of a calm and gentle midnight sky" or some other such description which can be both poetic and descriptively accurate at the same time.

Griffin Productions

Griffin Productions #4 · Dec 7th, 2015 · · ·

6706643 Well I never claimed to be a wordsmith Thanks for your input.

Garnet Shield

Garnet Shield #5 · Dec 7th, 2015 · 1 · ·

Despite the few grammar errors. I enjoyed it. Well done

Outa-here

Outa-here #6 · Dec 7th, 2015 · · ·

6706661

You're welcome. Now...

Well I never claimed to be a wordsmith

As a writer wouldn't that be something you'd be working to develop and perfect? Personally, I'd like to see you become the very best writer you can be.

Griffin Productions

Griffin Productions #7 · Dec 7th, 2015 · · ·

6708316 As would I, and yes, that's what writers do haha I should've said I am not a MASTER wordsmith XP

But trying to keep pacing is hard with ADD always bugging you. That's why I try to write only short stories..

Not an excuse, just an explanation. A challenge worth overcoming.

Outa-here

Outa-here #8 · Dec 7th, 2015 · 1 · ·

6708362

Well, if it's any consolation, perhaps I can encourage you by telling you that I've always struggled and had to deal with dyslexia (I touch type, my fingers aren't dyslexic), ADD, ADHD, various learning disabilities which are so bizarre they've never been able to label them and Aspergers. I never let those things stand in my way since, whenever I decided to do a thing I just threw myself totally into it and went for it.

I still think I've managed to do pretty well, though.

Real_SilentPony