- Member Since 26th Feb, 2012
- offline last seen Jan 22nd, 2019
Aegis Shield
Also known as "TtheWriter" on youtube, if you're into Dungeons and Dragons stuff. :3
Aegis Shield
Joined 26th Feb, 2012 ·
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An interesting start. I'm curious enough to see where this goes. You maintain your usual high standard.
One thing though, I believe that 'rapist' is the proper term for someone convicted of such a crime.
Hm...
...
Hm....
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Dark, but fascinating. Also, good to see you writing, Aegis! How've you been?
Huh. He could have just bashed his head against the wall until it was done. But I guess that takes a lot of effort and energy, and it'd kill the story too quickly. Well done
Who could that shadow mare be? Is she an OC or an actual canon character?
Ooh...creepy. I like it!
An air of mystery and/or dread always helps a story, I always say.
Man this is really interesting. The first chapter was good but this second one really sealed the deal for me. Nicely done.
this is...entruiging. Very much so.
Commence read.
Hm.
Reminded me of Pokemon.
Now he's done it. RIP Oil Base.
Well done, Oil Base. Now you'll die a hero!
Also I don't know if someone already pointed it out but isn't it "rapist" instead of "raper"?
This doesn't sound as minimum security prison, but a regular one. Especially with the supposed aggression of other inmates, no pencils and other 'dangerous' stuff, as well as type of inmates.
In normal min-sec there is no reason for crayons and napkins when you can have normal pen/pencils and notebooks. Same thing with the "Dead Mare Lore Book". Normal notebook, not scrap Frankenstein.
Real life min-sec:
cdn.theatlantic.com/static/infocus/animals050412/s_a26_20169340.jpg
6618080 Magic Talking Ponies.
Different Prison System.
You REALLY should revised that idea of "min-sec", because if it is as you intended, Equestria has more unforgiving jailing system than Russia. And they have gulags.
By Wikipedia:
Commence read.
Well, to late there.
Just some feedback/suggestions here
A ran a little water and splashed my face.
Shouldn't it be I ran a little water and splashed my face.
“Just go away. Maybe in five yearsI'll get out, get my sanity back and we can NOT chat then,”
You forgot a space between "years" and "I'll"
Besides that, this story is already amazing.
I'm reading this around midnight in my timezone in my near pitch black room (of course if it wasn't for my laptop screen creating some light) and this chapter literally sent some chills down my spine with that nightmare and the ending of the chapter.
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From what I understand "raper" is more commonly used in Europe.
6634398 Never mind, turns out it's correct. Just sounds weird. Also it's apparently a US derivative, never heard it here in Europe.
6634398
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The only time *I've* ever seen it was in "A Red Sun Also Rises" and in the First "Game of Thrones" book. Medeival and Steampunk Societies, which-- Let's face it, Equestria is "Anachronistic Steampunk" at best with all their magic and trains. XD
6635592 Fair enough.
Funniest thing, I've read about half of your stories, but never once did I check the author on this one until now.
6635362 Forgive me, I'm just an ignorant Yank.
Commence read.
When you forget to follow a story and then there is an update.
Interesting card logic.
Commence read.
Looks likea quick typo.
Them inception moments.
AAAAAAAAGH! How long will this torture last?! I love this story!
That coma thing was such a huge tease! The flickering white pinprick eyes sent chills down my spin. This chapter is way too good.
Very. Very. Good. This is the kind of thing so beautifully twisted it makes me cackle. I look forward to more, should it come.
this has some nice mental horror going for it!
I sure hope you will continue this one to its conclusion, I'm really hooked!
It’s such a shame that this never updated past the reveal. I really liked where it was heading. The fact that it is not marked canceled gives me hope it may update one day, at your leisure, though if it really is canceled could it please be marked as such?