This story is a sequel to The Autocorrect Spell
Forbidden to use magic unsupervised, Noonlight Bright continues with her studies in magical theory. However, Trixie soon arrives with a great idea - challenge Twilight Sparkle to a magic duel by mail.
Since it's on paper, Noonlight shouldn't get in trouble, and Trixie might finally best her eternal rival. What could possibly go wrong?
Many thanks to The Hat Man and Admiral Biscuit for pre-reading and valuable advice.
Special thanks to The Descendant for proof-reading, editing and support.
Thanks to Scathecraw for proofreading the first few chapters as I kept adding things.
This story wouldn't have been the same without you, guys. :)
Chapters (11)
Fffffffir.....
Oh, wait, can't say that.
The thing I like best about this is that I've never seen this concept before. It fits the world--could be an episode, even.
6413099 Thank you, Admiral :))
As I mentioned, the story wouldn't be what it is without your help :))
Hopefully this won't be the end to the saga :D
I have much to say about this story, but I'm beat after two hours of continuous reading and need to rest (Noonlight would approve)!
More to come in the morning!
6413241 Thank you :) Hope you enjoyed :)
And indeed, Trixie and Noonlight approve of sleep :D
Okay, back and rested!
After reading through The Autocorrect Spell, I immediately got into this. The premise is unique which is not an easy thing to manage after years of fanfiction. I like how things progressed, from a desire to test oneself, to escalating into a desperate gambit to remain hidden. The juxtaposition of wanting the magic mail duel to continue, even at the cost of discovery, kept things tense and interesting.
I'm not sure I got a full grasp of Noonlight's character, though. She seems to bounce between studious nerd, depressed introvert, to giddy troublemaker. I suppose having Trixie as a friend can rattle anypony, but I'm left wondering just what type of pony Noonlight is.
Speaking of Trixie, I do like how you handled her here. She's just as loud and in charge as ever, but with an undercurrent of fondness for Noonlight. I thought it weird how she would occasionally be all "motherly" towards Noonlight, but other than that, I believed the relationship the two had. Trixie is one of those characters where, even if she's doing the right thing, you get a sense that she's using the opportunity to hog the spotlight.
Writing wise, I think a few more passes are needed to really iron out the kinks. A few minor spelling mistakes, but plenty of punctuation errors that disrupt the flow of the sentences. It became frustrating to read in places where paying attention was crucial. I also think there was an overabundance of magibabble; my eyes started to glaze over some of the magical discussions towards the middle.
I also felt the ending to be abrupt. Things are solved and Noonlight's future is promising, but it's all summed up in about two paragraphs. I know we see almost everything through Noonlight's perspective, but I kinda wanted to know what happened to Trixie and how Noonlight's relationship with Twilight will change going forward. I actually applaud leaving certain details out (particularly involving Trixie during certain parts of the story), as it leaves the readers to fill the gaps themselves and want more. Perhaps a side-story involving Trixie during specific story events?
Overall, once I started, I couldn't stop until I was finished. The hook grabbed me and kept me on the ride. Thanks for an entertaining story!
6413773 Rest is always good :D
Well, I thought this might be a logical progression from the Autocorrect Spell :) For some reason I see Trixie as the Indiana Jones of MLP (although much different than Daring Doo). Also, Trixie did vanish for specific reasons now and again :) and her helping out Noon is no accident (although, she'd probably do that, Noon being more or less her only friend at this point :))
As for Noonlight's character, tried to make her confused (somewhere between shy and cocky, if that makes sense :)) ups and downs ups and downs :D
Curse that grammar! :P Will go through it again to try to weed things out.
6424553
Layers!? Are you calling Trixie and onion?
6424553 Thanks :) Glad you enjoyed :)
Originally this was supposed to be a 5 k short... then I got distracted. :( still have problems with short forms. At times have problems adding a bit too much info while skipping out certain details. Sigh
And, yes, love Trixie (although also love all characters with one exception). :)
6425466 Well, she does occasionally make people cry... :)
6426366
Hah, those foals had it coming.
The ending feels slightly crumpled.
But this is thought provoking, (I got new ideas from it!) well written, and deserves much more exposure than it apparently has.
More please! :)
6833398 :) Thank you. This remains one of the settings I have a soft spot for.
Have a few notes jotted down on the subject somewhere... O:)
Man that is a good story. I wonder what happens next.
"the vending"? Did you mean "the morning" or "the meeting" or something?
I enjoyed the story. All characters felt right and I got a few giggles
This was a refreshing read. No romance or anything. Just friends being friends and having fun. Although, Twilight totally cheated in the duel by declaring it a tie.