Dashing through the Rainbow

by somedude

Chapter 1

Dashing through the Rainbow

By:Somedude

AN: "Understand the fact that i'm Dutch and this is my first story ever."
"Please rate fair." :)

I live my life just like you,i breath just like you, still i feel im different from anybody else.

Hi im Jake Talon, im 15 years old, i live a boring life with boring parents in a simple school with only one fiend but thats not all im a brony to.
I see myself as a normal/aggressive guy but i still think im diffrent from the average teen.
For examlpe: I try stuff and dont care what others think about it. (My Little Pony FIM) And im not affraid to hit somebody even when they are in a large group. (Thats also a bad habit of me i got my ass kicked cuz of that.)

"Well heres my story."

DAY 1
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Another boring day at school standing against the wall with my bud, Carl. We were standing in the hallway and Carl had to pee.
Of course just then a group of morons stopped by to make fun of me, i was a short tempered boy but i also
was a pretty good fighter cuz i practised kickboxing, i use it to work off steam.

Moron: "Wazup pony boy umad???"
Jake: "shut up you stupid IQ-less punk"
Moron: "watcha gona do fagot call you're pony friends?"

I was on the edge of kicking his ass, when suddenly i heard carl's voice.
Carl:"Leave him alone you idiot, if you don't go he will kick youre ass!!!"
Carl knew i was a good fighter well.... i think he knows evrything about me, and hes a brony to

Moron:"Well well so you're a good fighter A?" He stared at me in dissbelive"

Moron again:"Why dont you PROVE IT"

With the last two words his fist hedded straight for my nose i doged it and held my pose (my kickboxing pose)
i hitt him right in his face and again and again and again and yes AGAIN,
until he passed out.

Everybody ran away in fear except Carl of course.
Carl:"I just hope they don't tell the teachers what happend. Becuz it will probaly end up with that moron playing the victim
and you getting the badguy roll"
I nodded, "well yea but not like i care anymore,bisides my life is already a piece of shit."

Carl:"Well yea but you can still get into more trouble, sooo.""I nodded slowly"

After i nodded, there was a ringing sound.
"THE BELL OOOH FUCK WERE LATE AGAIN!" I said" "C'mon run faster!"
Carl:"I cant!" After finaly reaching the class we were tired out.

The stupid-est of all was that this was the most annoying old hardest fucking teacher of all.
"Mr. Vulture sorry were late!" I said
The old man: "YOU ARE 10 MIN TO LATE!!!"
We:"Yea were realy sorry"
The old man:"10 MINUTES TO LATE IS 10 HOURES DETENTION!" He said

We:"WHAAAAT?!?!"
Me:"No im not gona do that. Im leaving this fucking class i'm done here!"
The old man:"COME BACK HERE YOU!!!

"Make me, i said calmly". then i ran off

DAY 2
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I arrived at school only to see almost all off te students looking at me like i was a sheep.
I simply ignored all off them. It must be because of yesterday.
I needed some time alone so i walked out of the canteen into a hallway next to an open classroom i leaned back and thought of how deep i was in trouble.

Than IT happend, i saw a bue familiar blur in the hal way straight ahead, it was chaced by a group off students.
It was comming closer, at this point i recognized it.

Me:"R-R-Rainbow Dash?!?!"

I was always good at fast thinking, so i opened the door and as she was getting close I yelled:"GET IN DASHIE!!!"
She quikly flew in the room. As she did i quikly closed the door and blocked it with a chair.

SAFE.

Comments

[CrypticMetaphor]

writing format is...odd, butt the story itself cdn.styleforum.net/f/f4/f4360c66_most-impressive-darth-vader.jpeg

[Silver Wrench]

You could benefit from someone else proof reading your material (Like I should be talking), but other than that not bad.

[somedude]

579991 Its very hard for me to write this, seeing im Dutch, and this is my first story.

I try hard. :)

[Faint Abril Darkness]

580172 and you are doing okay. But, you do need somebody to edit/revise. Would you accept my offer of help?

[somedude]

580285 I duno man I personally wanted my own made story thanks for the offer dow

[somedude]

580285 i cant thank you enough
thanks

[Gaz1997]

not bad ill watch +!

[Cat Eye]

y is there a big gap after SAFE

[greyyy]

580472 if I had the money, I would pay you to have me revise yours

[Dieter N.]

580472 If you need a Proofreader, I'd gladly help.

[PieisGood4U]

Ok hope i wont sound too harsh.

Spelling here on first chapter is fairly horrible. Is it possible for you to write a new chapter with correct spelling and put up?
some where simply awful. "B(l)ue familiar, F(r)iend" they are in need of a change

otherwise this seems nice

[Ghostwind Assasinshy]

i good but theres too much space in the end but who care next chapter please

[Peppermint N Swirl]

I can't stop laughing, top tier story 10/10