Starlight Glimmer was a specail unicorn. As in, she had special needs that made her easily angered an often picked on as a filly.
Then, after one of her bad days at school, she end up at a cave outside of her town that offers her to make the world in the way she wants it, where everypony is happy and isn't picked on. All they have to do, is give up there cutie marks and smile all the time no matter what.
Doesn't that. Sound fun?
Part of this story idea came from Dr. Wolfs theory's he had on the clip preview at commacon.
Chapters (1)
They have a convention about commas? Damn, I want tickets.
Hey dude, I have to say this story is amazing, except for one thing.
The grammar. It needs work badly.
Other than that it's actually good. Good details, adjectives and the like.
Could use some other things here and there, but other than that it's great.
If you'd like some help with it, I'd be glad to help you.
Are we not gonna talk about how the story's in there twice?
So good it makes you wanna read it twice!
¿Is a Spacail Unicorn like a Special Unicorn? I recommend free help from 1 of the proof-reading groups. The editors make suggestions, but the final form of the story is up to you.
5710766 by all means, it's the one thing that holds me back
Jokes aside, you have an okay story concept, but it's ruined by a few things.
1) The grammar is atrocious. You constantly use the wrong tenses and inflections, and it makes the story hard to take seriously.
This is unintentionally hilarious for people familiar with the notorious parody fanfic Doom: Repercussions of Evil.
2) You somehow managed to paste two copies of the story. You should probably fix that. Like, now.
I'm pretty sure you didn't mean to have that, either. This line, and everything after it, should be deleted.
3) I know you were trying to make Starlight into a brutal dictator near the end, and it kind of worked. But it would have worked better had she not killed anyone. It just seems silly to have someone executed for simply saying "Wait, what?".
4) Isn't it a bit early to be writing fics about this character? I mean, you run the risk of having every detail of this story be contradicted by the Season 5 premiere. Plus, people who aren't up to date on spoilers will be thinking that you made some sort of OC.
5710873 Well, do you want some help with it? I'm more than willing to.
5710874 I agree with all you say, I thought the same for the execution part as well.
This was an awesome story!
There was way too many mistakes though. I am more than happy to edit for you, if you need any pegasistance 
and also, I wrote a story called equality, back when there was only one trailer.
But her name is Equality in my Fic lol
5711057
5710766
5710858
5710886
5711057
If anyone wants to pre-read, here you go:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1VrJgltEMjpW73wGgYq9uy0TzhptXsKYSKY7Azr6x9UU/mobilebasic
Starlight glimmer, sunset shimmer
I wonder....
Completed? How could this be completed?
I sense a pony version of Stalin on the rise here.
Also, how did Cat go from being an earth pony to a unicorn?
I noticed a few typos such as:
But still great story
Knighty added tag for Starlight Glimmer, you may add it now.