Twilight has always loved mysteries. Almost nothing could compare to the joy she feels when finding an answer to a question no pony knew. But now she's solved a mystery with an answer she doesn't want, and it's one she can never forget
Anon made a major impact on the lives of every friend he made in his time in Equestria, but he had to return home sometime. However, his friends weren't ready for him to leave just yet. Writing letters is supposed to be therapeutic...
When Rainbow Dash takes in a baby Pegasus left on her doorstep, she learns what it means to be a mother to a child with special needs when it's revealed that she is completely blind.
This is all right, but you've gone a little too long without introducing any new, important information. You have a character with a strong emotion, but not a story. If we're supposed to sympathize, we probably need to know whether the narrator deserves our sympathy. For a story, something else has to happen, and we ought to have an idea what by now.
Interesting...who is she engaged to? Who's writing this? I can't wait to find out!
This is all right, but you've gone a little too long without introducing any new, important information. You have a character with a strong emotion, but not a story. If we're supposed to sympathize, we probably need to know whether the narrator deserves our sympathy. For a story, something else has to happen, and we ought to have an idea what by now.
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Thanks for the advice. I almost made chapter 3 about something with a bit more substance to it, but I'll try to slide that into chapter 4. . .
the mystery deepens ?????who????
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Poor Stallion. . . Never knew what hit him
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who said it was a stallion?
5647208 Awe shoot. . .
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Good story.