Aspiring writer, self-proclaimed hardcore gamer, adept of human psychology. Does not consider excessive pride for a vice.
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Sunset Shimmer, once overbearing and rude, is living proof that people can change. When she finds out that the Dazzlings are being expelled from Canterlot High for their crimes, she will make an attempt to understand their past and salvage their future.
Even if she can help only one of them, she believes it's worth it.
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Hello and welcome to Expulsion!
I did not plan writing this, it sort of happened after watching Rainbow Rocks, learning why everyone loves Sonata Dusk so much, and reading Chasing Your Own Tail by devas. These three sources had me inspired, and I hope you'll find the outcome worthwhile. Inside you'll find my headcanon on sirens, properly reformed Sunset Shimmer, and of course the best (worst?) principal around.
Enjoy!
Sonata is pleased. Good to have you back, Prane.
fc09.deviantart.net/fs71/i/2014/274/6/4/sonata_dusk_loves_tacos_by_pixelkitties-d817uiq.png
This makes me think that Adagio and Aria went through the portal in some sort of attempt at suicide. It's a pretty morbid thought, and I'm not convinced it's the thought you were going for. Sometimes I worry about myself...
*of, not for
*for, not from, is usually how that phrase goes.
Pretty solid story.
this is actually a really good story,
I do really like the characterisation of sonata as someone who isn't smart but isn't dumb and her use of slight bits of humor as a sort of mask to hide her feelings comes across very believably the build up from sunsets talk with sonata actually made me tear up a little and the sense of sonata's conveying of sonata's lack of direction Is quite good plus the little attempts at humor during her explanation really conveyed the sense of someone who is barely holding together.
Celestia's characterisation is another thing that I like too the trying to keep a cheesy grin internalised made me chuckle, and the way she let sunset get her feelings out before revealing the truth seemed very believable of her character.
also mad colonel spitfire...pure gold.
and aside from a few easily overlooked grammatical errors nothing and a few little nit-picks of preference nothing really rubbed me the wrong way and came across as very believable
overall a great story that I personally give a solid 8/10.
Wait... did the other girls just up and kill themselves rather than live like humans?
5219542 Well unless starswirl sent them to the future as well as banishing them to earth, I'd say they were at least a couple thousand years old. There comes a point when you just get bored of living I guess. Sonata hasn't really done much living of her own over that time though, so she would still have a reason to try again for a good life.
That is a very nice and heartwarming story! Everyone deserves a second chance.
Great job!
I would love to read more of this story!
Good job!
wish this wasn't a one-shot, i would love to see more of this story
Oh man, this is a frigging beautiful one shot. I love your take on Sonata, you made her so very nicely three dimensional with that "I'm not smart, but I'm not stupid" bit.
I would love to see this idea expanded, it just... It just works so well in my mind. Sunset and Sonata as proper friends. I love it far too much, so fantastic work!
5219542
It all comes down to how the pony world and the human one are connected. Like 5219841 pointed out, the girls may as well be 1000+ years old and just want to quit. I don't think they did, though. They definitely went their separate ways after losing their siren powers - Adagio was too proud to admit defeat, Aria too grumpy to stay at school. Perhaps they're out there, either plotting, trying to fix their pendants, or trying to make the ends meet? The possibilities are, as usual, endless.
5219160
Thanks for the fixes. At least this time I've managed to avoid silly typos - success!
5218985
I aim to please, and it's good to "be back". Although technically I've never left, I found out that late autumn and winter are just better for reading and writing for some reason.
5221250 5220345
Also the worst, considering that I don't have the faintest idea where would I go with this story. Here's hoping to a random thought that'll come out of nowhere one day and turn itself into a proper sequel!
Aww, you guys are the best!
5221917
That's what I intended to show. A character can be unintelligent, ignorant, perhaps even silly, but still likable if not made into a featherbrain. Also, I think Sunset could use a friend of her own. She's hanging with the Humain 5, but they aren't quite equal in that relation. In the movie she's constantly on the side, sort of a "background friend" (who of course saved the day rocked the finale is the best pony human everything).
Thank you!
5222057 Sunset Shimmer IS now best character (apart from maybe Chrysalis), yes
EDIT: to clarify, your take on her is fricking great too, part of why she is now The Best.
Great story! I really love it!
5222019 Maybe it's because of the atmosphere.
5219510
Thanks for the feedback!
Writing Sonata was fun. From the very start I wanted to make her feel real, hence the lack of those one-dimensional tacos in the story. She's a character who is about to start a new chapter in life, with all that uncertainty surrounding her, and I'm glad that you've liked such characterization.
As for Principal Celestia, it is still unclear to me if we can treat her character as essentially Princess Celestia in human form (because the latter is 1000+ years old, something which doesn't work well on humans), so I've decided to highlight who she is regardless of the world, namely a teacher, a mentor for Sunset and others (with the slightest touch of trolling!).
Fun fact: the whole "Mad Colonel" thing on Spitfire was a last minute addition to the story.
All in all, thanks for dropping by, it's much appreciated!
5222307
Thanks, I'm glad to hear that you've enjoyed it!
Fruit Bats like my story, yay!
5223786
You're probably right. Now I suddenly wish for an early - and long - winter.
5220229
They sure do! Such a redemption chain can work wonders. Perhaps in time, Sonata will find Aria and Adagio and reform them?
5222062
Ah, so you're also a fan of Chryssi? It seems that our preferences are alike, then! You can find her in Cheersalis if you're interested, while Sunset stars in Dune Goddess; that's pony Sunset from before her fall, mind you (also, blatant self promotion FTW!).
If not, here's a consolation in form of a Sunset/Chrysalis/NMM mash-up (I simply adore this picture!):
fc02.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2014/128/9/b/commission__unlikely_combination_by_heilos-d7hlg4d.png
5226627 You and me both.
HiveLordLusa pretty much took the words out my mouth. Great job!
Love this cute little story. You know this could have potential for more. Don't know if you actually planned more of it but I will still hope.
Sonata is a cute character.
5227142
Thanks a lot, I'm happy to hear you've liked it!
5231782
It was planned and written as a one-shot. Sorry! Maybe someday I'll be in a mood to write more Sunset/Sonata and I'll build from the events of this story.
This story is beautiful!
I hope you can consider making a sequel to this story. I wanna see what happens next in the story!
Worked down to this one today on my Read Later list, and I like it a lot. I'll join the others in saying that I thought Celestia's characterization was really well done. Quite an unexpected treat.
And then the overall story premise is heartwarming and lines up well with my own headcanon. It could almost be a prelude to one I've been working on for the last week or so with a setting several months after this. =)
5252854
That's great! Let me know once you've published your fic, I'd love to read it!
As for Celestia, I have to confess that there wasn't any big science behind her lines. I just imagined her as a moralizing mentor/headteacher combo, and what would such individual do in her situation. I'm glad you people liked that.
5257727 Will do. Using artist terms, I just need to pen in a few remaining sketched parts of chapters 2 and 3, so hoping within the week. Lucky to have a couple of established folks here helping with editing tips and proofreading (who I'll be sure to credit in the author notes, heh).
Very nicely done
5262372
Thank you, it's much appreciated!
D'aaaaaaawwwwwww, I'm getting a case of the fuzzys.
Nice work.
Have you ever considered submitting this story to Equestria Daily? You can find out how to do so here.
5257911 Where did you get the icon for your avatar?
5301346 Ah, I made it. At risk of self-promotion, the full pic is at Inner Beauty.
5234172
You! Person! Sorry for not replying to your kind comment for so long, but I had a good reason. You see, you've asked for a sequel, and if you read through my comments responding to other people asking for the same thing you probably noticed that I wasn't going to make one. Still, you guys broke me, and your comment was the final push I needed to continue. In other words, all should hail you because inadvertently, you made the sequel possible!
5282192
For possibly more fuzzies, consult the above link!
5301402
That's a pretty pretty Sunset! Also, I really like your Messenger art. I'd love to read the full story for that one.
5308103
FTFY. ;)
But we'll see, I might some day.
Edit, Speaking of writing, and regarding your earlier question, the fic is published now and I should be adding the 3rd chapter in a day or two. Just check my profile for the link if you haven't seen it yet.
5308112
How did I miss that.
Adding to Read Later list!
ITS GENIUS! HIGH PRAISE! HIGH PRAISE INDEED!
5322611
I'm glad you like it.
Also, welcome to FiMFiction!
>>Prane
Hay, this may be the first time a creator of online art has ever replied to me, awesome...
wait a second...
it knows that I only started this account yesterday? Witchcraft!
5323977
You'll find the community here rather welcoming. Just join some groups, comment on threads and, if you so desire, write a story of your own!
Protip: if you hover the cursor over the user's name bar to the left you'll see some useful info, including how long they've been on the site. Sorry, no witchcraft in here!
5324820
Well I took Pranes advice, I have been commenting on various stories, and while I havnt joined any groups, I have written the first chapter of my first story, and will get to publishing it once I het my younger brother to read it and give me feedback.
Thank you prane for your advice and kindness.
Note: It is done, the first chapter of my first fiction has been published. HAZAH!
Have a ribbon:
i.imgur.com/j8cG26r.png
5383293
Yay! I love that new design!
Also, for what it's worth, thank you and the staff of Twilight's Library for your hard work.
5385997
You are quite welcome. Enjoy your ribbon
s6.postimg.org/dd47s96ap/Pirate_Approved.jpg
5552656
Yarr! Thank ye for yer appreciation here 'n at this tale's sequel!
I love your celestia, the way you presented her thoughts as she talked to sunset gave it this lovely sort of warmth that I think
matches well with how a Principal Celestial would be like.
Sunsets as determined as she was in RR to guide her friends.
A nice read. I'm off to the sequel!
There's a proper tag for principal Celestia now.
8566324
Fixed now - and it its sequel - thanks for letting me know!
8566335
Sure thing!
Love it!
8620218
I'm happy to hear that you enjoyed it, thanks for reading! :)