Fluttershy made a mistake, one that is haunting Ponyville and killing ponies. She knows who is doing it. She knows how to stop them. She knows why. But is she strong enough? Or will she need the help of a certain rainbow maned friend?
This is my Halloween story, one that sparked when listening to this. Be warned, blood is present, though not much. Also much Flutterbat Badassery as well.
This takes place after Bats! but before Twilight's Kingdom, thus there is no Crystal Castle, but there is Twilight Alicorn.
The cover image is not mine. Used without permission. If the artist wants me to take it down, I will. Found here: Cover art
Chapters (2)
Wow
NEED MORE! MOAR!!!!!!!
um... if that's okay with you that is...
5206594 That depends on inspiration and reception. Mainly inspiration.
I read the description and it looks really good! I'll read it soon!
5206690 I welcome your feedback! Enjoy it!
Love this story!!!!!!!!!#
5207070 Glad to hear it! What do you like about it?
this is what i got out of that:
ending: fluttershy burned up. the end!
5266272 The ending was left ambiguous. What happens is what you want to happen.
I may come back to this and write a sequel with Rainbow Dash....
5266949
LOOKING FORWARD TO IT
i mean... if you want to
Wow
. This is really impressive. I'm sorry I didn't read it when it was first released, when it was relevant.
The narrative style of this story is kind of weird, but in a good way: It's a style I only rarely see, and very rarely see done well. It's called no exposition. Other than the first few paragraph or so, there's really no more introduction of anything else in the story—the antagonist, Flutterbat's alignment, Fluttershy's "pact" with the Bat, anything. I only run into story elements when I, well, run into them! And for a story like this that hinges on mystery and obfuscation of information, it's fitting.
Such a pity that I can only write stories linearly
. Your's is kinda U-shaped: introduce a conflict at the very beginning of the story, and don't reveal what it is until some 6,000 words down the road! I'm tensed up the entire time, waiting to see what happens next. Not sure if it was intentional or not, but it works.
Consider yourself followed, because I am very interested to see what you'll come up with next!
Oh. But I got just this one thing . . .
A little confused here. The stone slammed into Twilight? And then she [Tasty] comes out with a hole in her throat?
5311336
Thanks for your feedback! It's a great surprise to see such praise for a one-shot inspired by a music video!
And on your concern, what I was going for was that Rainbow threw a rock at Twi's throat, knowing that she was immortal and would survive the hit, aiming for Tasty who would be thrown backward and separated from Twilight.
5311460 Ah, I get it. You might want to clarify that then. As I read it, it just looked like a typo, and Rainbow was never aiming for Twilight. Immortality doesn't always mean invulnerability, y'know?
5311680
Yes, but I'm taking it as quick healing. Twilight was unconscious for a time while her body healed itself, while her spirit was guarded by the Element of Magic itself during that time.
I don't think you meant to say twilight there.
Well done! TIER 2.
http://www.fimfiction.net/blog/415809/tiered-bookshelves
5779906 Thanks for the fave! This now ties with my most popular story, Magical Mystery Cure, My take!
*rubs hands together* now to make it the most viewed story.