Meet Bill Cipher

by linksbro1

Tip of the Hat!

“Thank you for such a friendly greeting Princesses!” Bill exclaimed. “I tip my hat to you!” Bill reached up to the brim of his top hat, tipping it forward. But as it tilted off of his head (point?), everypony felt their weight shift. Everypony looked round to the source of this strange feeling.

As Bill’s hat tipped more, ponies began sliding across the ground, shouting in surprise. As Twilight looked back up to Bill as she held herself in place with her magic, she immediately connected the dots.

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING?” Twilight shouted. Bill turned to face her, an amused expression on his face(?).

“I’m tipping gravity!” He said simply. Nopony was amused with his actions, other than Pinkie, who had such a delicate relationship with the laws of physics that even the slightest change would drastically affect her. She laughed uncontrollably as she floated in random directions, bumping into trees, buildings, and shop stalls.

“Well… Stop doing that!” Twilight snarled. At the angry look across her visage, Bill chuckled.

“You should lighten up Sparkle! I thought that you’d be going loco by now, trying to study me for science!” Bill did however concede. Straightening his top hat, gravity returned to normal, causing everypony to stop sliding, and Pinkie fall from above, shrieking in glee.

Celestia and Luna shared a look. Confusion. Apprehension. Curiosity. Fear. Many more emotions were exchanged in the small glance, and both were thinking the same thing. This strange being was powerful, and obviously had little to no consideration for those around him.

“I will not ‘lighten up’.” Twilight stated firmly. This only caused Bill to laugh.

“It’s funny when you don’t understand something! You get so frustrated, it amuses me to no end how cute you are!” Bill retorted playfully.

With an exasperated ‘UUUGGGHH!’, Twilight turned and stomped off angrily.

“Awww, did I upset you? I’m sorry, I’m only trying to have some fun” Bill said with a mix of sincerity and teasing before turning to the sisters. “SO! This is awkward! Let’s just get the party started to avoid any further frustration and/or distrust!”

“YA! NO MORE FROWNIES! IT’S PARTY TIME!” Pinkie yelled gleefully, appearing suddenly between Celestia and Luna.

At Pinkie’s loud declaration, the ponies populating the square gave a cheer, and continued idly chatting amongst themselves as music emanated from speakers scattered around the general area.

“Ah well!” Bill sniffed “I guess this is the part where we go and be social, Princesses! I guess I’ll talk to you later after you both decide on whether or not I’m a threat to Equestria!” With that, Bill hovered off into the crowd.

“He’s… Rather odd.” Luna remarked. “Obviously has power, though I am unsure of his intentions.”

“Indeed” Celestia replied, “The most off putting thing is how bluntly he says things. ‘To avoid any further frustration and/or distrust’? ‘ I’ll talk to you later after you both decide on whether or not I’m a threat to Equestria’? It is possible he’s just here to have a good time…”

“But what does ‘a good time’ entail? We both know Discord’s idea of ‘a good time’.”

Celestia paused at her sister’s comment.

“For now, we observe, and do nothing that might cause him to think of us as enemies.”

---

Bill, hovering amongst the crowd, idly chatted with random ponies. Answering questions (“Yes! Zombies DO exist, but not in this universe. Such a shame…”), and other chatter (“Hey! Did you know that if you take an egg, some chocolate and 600,000 tons of poison joke, you can create a portal to easter land?”).

Between these brief exchanges, Bill was searching for six certain ponies. The same six ponies who had caught his attention years ago, and finally after years of waiting for the perfect opportunity, he was finally going to have some fun with them. As his eye scanned the crowd, he finally spotted Rainbow Dash filling a plastic cup with punch. Quickly zooming over, he waited for her to finish pouring.

“YYYEEELLO!” Bill exclaimed, startling Dash into nearly spilling her drink. Looking round, she sighs in exasperation when her eyes lay on Bill.

“Not. Cool.” Dash said through gritted teeth.

“I know! Usually for this time of year the temperature would be lower! What month is it?” Bill looked at his wrist. “Oh look at that! It’s October!”

Rainbow Dash looked at Bill’s wrist. He was not wearing a watch.

“The twelfth. To be exact” Dash turned back to the punch bowl. “Whaddya want?”

“I’m doing a socials!” Bill exclaimed with glee.

Rainbow Dash paused as she tried to process what Bill had said.

“You’re doing a…. what??”

“A socials! Apparently flesh bags interact with talking-ness at parties, so I decided to give it a try!”

Rainbow Dash didn’t know what to think. Was this thing mocking her… or just stupid?

“Uh, ya, you know, talking and stuff. That’s social, sure.” Dash prayed the talking triangle guy would just leave her alone. The guy freaked her out.

“Oh hey! If I know correctly- and I always do- you like pranks!” Bill circled to Dash’s front, so she was looking at him.

“What does that matter?” Dash tried to turn away again, only to have Bill stay directly in front of her as she turned.

“I thought you might be interested in one prank that I have lined up!” Bill looked at her expectantly.

Rainbow Dash considered her options. She could just tell the top hat wearing jerk to get lost, and hope for the best, or…

Curiosity got the better of her as she gazed at Bill. What had this guy come up with?

“Alright” She uttered, giving in. “What've you got?”

Author's Note:

Sometimes, you just gotta bite the bullet and spit it back out, assassinating a US president!

---

Dear god
I am so sorry for the wait. Between school, stress, losing my mind, and lack of motivation, not a lot of writing got done.

I am hoping to work on this more, and I am not planning to use ciphers as often due to not everyone knowing what to do with them.

Comments

[Spiritofchaos227]

UPDATE!~ Yay

[Krazy Stargazer]

Really cool story thus far. Although I thought Bill was omipowerfull in dreams only? I guess that would give him competition in Luna's line of work.

I take it because he now has a "real" body his powers transfer over right?

[Dirty Bit]

I feel your pain brother, only replace school with job.

I love Bill Cipher's hat trick Funny enough, I thought of his second appearance with Dipper when I noticed this updated.

[linksbro1]

5472004
That's the idea!
Later in the story, there will be some serious showing off of his powers.

[Krazy Stargazer]

5472033 Still their are some concerns I have. To me a demon is powerful but only at the expence of another. Where as a God is always powerful.

So I kind of cringe when I see the Alacorns and Discord so disturbed by him when in my mind their on the top of the food chain. Plus if they underestameted him it would make Bill's true power all the more impactfull

Those are just my two cents though

[Bones_]

Illuminati Dorito! I haven't read it yet but Illuminati Dorito!

[Bones_]

wait crossover?

[linksbro1]

5472244
shsshshshuuushhshhhh
images6.fanpop.com/image/photos/32700000/Stop-talking-Brain-thinking-Shush-doctor-who-32780997-245-154.gif

[Kobitsu]

Only one complaint: You should make the chapters longer

[Avenging-Hobbits]

31.media.tumblr.com/4bc0e3d622fb76c1def2b3c0fba603d5/tumblr_n3zrgsZjQB1twifbio1_400.gif

i.imgur.com/uu9pmDP.gif

[Avenging-Hobbits]

Also, I noticed that the party is taking place on October 12th....

that's my brother's birthday. What are the chances of that.

[linksbro1]

5472919
YA! WHAT ARE THE CHANCES? I CERTAINLY DIDN'T LOOK INTO THE INFINITE UNKNOWN AND PULL OUT A RANDOM FUTURE READER'S BROTHER'S BIRTHDAY
THAT WOULD JUST BE SILLY!

And I'm also DEFINITELY not possessing this guy right now

[Aku]

U'Q GCJAVUPW EOI

[JGameCartoonFan]

I made an account just to say... I LOVE YOUR STORY.

[Heartland]

Is the story dead?

[gamerboy111]

5472750
YOU COMMENTED ON MY STORY TOO!!! :O

[linksbro1]

6126735
No
I'm actually hoping on bringing in a co-writer soon so we can get the story really rolling

[Heartland]

6157775 Good, cud this story is one of the best I've read so far

[Lionblaze103]

6157775 I wouldn't mind co-writing for this story. It'll be really interesting to watch it play out.

[cultpony]

6214479 I watch Gravity falls regularly, or, as regularly as the show produces new episodes.

I was making the point that you don't make deals with a demon, it never ends good.

[Lionblaze103]

6214858 Yeah, I'm thinking about making my own crossover where Discord makes a deal with Bill, but with the twist that Bill takes over his body. Bill Cipher in Discord's body, that would not turn out well for anyone.

[Cracked Egg]

This story is dead, isn't it?

[linksbro1]

6233901
nooo it's not.
I'm having many changes in my life, which is delaying it considerably, and I'm sorry.
if you want to know what's up, check out this blog:
Something Kind of Serious...

[mrkillwolf666]

more plz

[sniper 1232]

6271532 portal ended
Chell got out and GLaD0S saw her error

[awesomesauce2345]

I like it

[ConfettiColored]

MOAR

[Radioactive Dragon]

6697974 sir if you want MOAR you need to spell it like MORE GOD DAMMIT GIVE ME MORE!

[ConfettiColored]

6714414 MORE?

[Radioactive Dragon]

6714872 no spell it like i am starting now: GOD DAMMIT I WANT MORE NOW NOW NOW NOW

[ConfettiColored]

6716109 No! I do what I want! Just start writing... Please?

[Radioactive Dragon]

6716140 then you dont want more ITS LOGIC!

[linksbro1]

6716140
6716193
Don't worry you two, the story isn't dead.

Just... college happened

[Radioactive Dragon]

6716439 i was teenager like you untill i took a collage to the knee

[linksbro1]

6716902
WELL WELL WELL
LOOK WHAT WE'VE GOT HERE! A NEW SACRIFICE FOR OUR LORD CIPHER! HOPE YOU LIKE HAVING YOUR FACE MELTED BY LIQUID IRON! (jk I luvs you )

[Delta238]

6717642 I like Bill Cypher because he honors his deals.

[ConfettiColored]

6716193 Logic? What's that? It sounds boring...

[Radioactive Dragon]

6717642 ..... even if you tried to give me to your lord or what ever im pretty sure he cant beat a void god

[linksbro1]

6719842
Bill is literally all powerful and was able to vaporize a being that could control the events of time and space paradox free... in less than a second.

[Radioactive Dragon]

6720998 well he can atleast not beat death the creator of all the most powerfull being ever

[ButtonMash]

6721051 Bill Cypher does as he wants. That's all you need to know.

[linksbro1]

6727403
49.media.tumblr.com/a9b68fb8abe055973af177859ec1eedc/tumblr_mvwow7NUj61qk0z6co1_500.gif

[PotatoManato]

*1 year later*

rip - this story "i cri"

[verypeeved]

5472244 yeeeeaaah that's dumb

[linksbro1]

6837980
Not dead. Just some things going on in my life, and college too. I've tried writing a few times, but have always been extremely dissatisfied with how the chapter was shaping and turning out. I've restarted chapter 6 about 3 or 4 times.

[PotatoManato]

6840870

Alright, understandable. The same things happening with my story.

The only thing is, though, things like that can start with "Hiatus" and then "Cancellation".

[yomon7]

help me I cant stop reading them and I cant stop laughing because of it

[RainbowRat]

Please write more I rilly like this

[RainbowRat]

Please continue *pleading face*

[RainbowRat]

Please please please please update