Drago, the God Killer, and Universe jumper, comes to an Equestria where an old god will give him something he has not had in a long time. A challenge. (Not a hate fic).
4993582 Thank you for your input, also the reason I let people google is because, I'm not so good at writing descriptions for stuff. I'm much better at writing action scenes.
One thing i might say though, it that the way drago talked with everyone, it was kinda cheating out of the conversation. Try to make the conversations and events last a little longer.
Hmm. Interesting.
You're overusing commas. A good percentage of these don't need to be here at all.
I shouldn't have to Google stuff to read your story. Never assume everyone plays all the same games you do, and try to actually describe stuff.
It's always gotta be a katana with you fanboys, doesn't it? What's wrong with a European broadsword?
You appear to be missing at least one word, maybe more...
beeline - A very direct or quick path or trip.
From bee + line, due to the belief that a bee returns to its hive in a straight course.
I could keep going, but I'd be here all day...
4993582 Thank you for your input, also the reason I let people google is because, I'm not so good at writing descriptions for stuff. I'm much better at writing action scenes.
4993777 Also, he does have a European broadsword, I never said he didn't.
I really hope Drago wins!
4993795 You'll just have to wait and see.
Oh, by the way as a note for people, Drago my sound OP, but don't worry, he can die.
One thing i might say though, it that the way drago talked with everyone, it was kinda cheating out of the conversation. Try to make the conversations and events last a little longer.
4993806 Thanks, I'll try, but I won't promise anything. I think I shine in the action sequences.
4993853 Oh yeah, don't worry his entire arsenal will be revealed.
4993889 Trying to make most of the weapons a surprise, don't want to show exactly what he's capable of yet do I?
4993944 Don't worry I got it.
4993959
I have to agree with 4993972 on this one. Between the dislike/like ratio and the comments, you obviously don't have it.
I thought by Drago you ment the chapter master of the grey knights, Man equstria just dodged a bolter round.