"Now, are you absolutely sure he's this way, Pinkie?"
Pinkie jitters up and down rapidly, hammering her hooves against the hard ground as the group trots along it. She is unable to stop herself, for she is currently trapped in the machinations of a powerful spell known as a 'doozy'.
"I-I-I-I-I t-t-think soooo!" the party pony shivers, her teeth clattering against one another as she does. "Sssssuuuggggaaarrrccuuuubbbbe C-c-c-"
Fluttershy places a hoof upon her friend's back in a calming manner.
"There there," she coos. "We heard you earlier, Pinkie. Somethings happening at Sugarcube Corner. Just relax until your doozy is over."
"T-t-t-thank y-y-y-you F-f-f-flutters-s-"
Suddenly, the earth pony stops where she stands. Her shivers have all together ended, leaving her tired but no longer affected. She breathes a sigh of relief. "Phew."
Applejack raises an eyebrow.
"So... what does that mean then?"
"That the doozy is over," Pinkie replies between huffs. "We must have missed it..."
"But he might still be there."
Pinkie shakes her lowered head, not looking at her fellow earth pony.
"M-maybe? I don't know. Never had a Pinkie sense moment like that one before. It... i-it felt..."
The farmer takes a step back from the suddenly scared sounding mare.
"It felt...?" Applejack asks cautiously.
The saddened party pony lifts her head up, but refuses to meet Applejack's eyes.
"... I-It felt... dark, AJ," Pinkie reluctantly admits. "Really, really d-dark... and sad... it has to be Big Mac." In possibly the lowest, most painfully small voice Applejack had ever heard her friend use, she adds "S-something bad must have happened to him. Somepony's feelings must have been really badly h-hurt. It's the only thing I can think of..."
And that, right there, scared Applejack to her very apple core.
She knew Big Mac was hurting ponies.
She knew he was leaving mares heartbroken, politicians suicidal, and friendships tarnished, if not forever destroyed.
But this time... this time it had set off Pinkie's sense.
The pony of laughter and happiness had been blind to the happenings going on around town all day long.
Until now.
"..."
... But that doesn't matter to the farmer in this instant. In this moment in time, her friend's happiness is much more important. Applejack takes a step closer to the depressed pink pony, foreleg extended. "Oh Pinkie..."
Before she can give her a much needed hug though, Fluttershy gently flutters down to the ground and rejoins the group. This surprises both Applejack and Pinkie Pie; neither had noticed that she had left to scout ahead the very moment the doozy's effects had ended.
The pegasus folds her wings and gallops up to the two. "We need to hurry, girls," she says in a surprisingly commanding voice. "Something did happen at Sugarcube Corner. I-I only saw from the sky though... Come on!"
With an equally surprising burst of speed, Fluttershy takes to the air once more and heads towards the Cake's home. Pinkie and Applejack trade worried glances for only a second before they both gallop off after their friend.
It doesn't take long for the three of them to round the corner and behold the scene laid out before them.
Sugarcube Corner is closed; the sign plastered to the door is a clear indicator of this fact. Ponies are gathered here though; a rather large crowd of them, in fact. Many conversations can be heard from the open square, most blending into each other to form an incomprehensible mess. The chatter is loud and impossible to follow, but an overall sense of gloom and foreboding hangs heavily over the gathering.
Something has indeed happened.
"Closed?" Pinkie Pie asks over the noise. "T-that can't be right; it's not even noon yet! W-where are the little fillies and colts supposed to go to relax after school now?" she adds gloomily, eyes lowered to the ground.
"This is awful," Fluttershy comments at a volume she rarely uses. "There's so many ponies here... Whatever could have happened?"
Applejack glares ahead.
"We need to find out; we need to talk to somepony."
With a nod of their heads her two friends quickly agree. The mare then steps forward, foreleg raised, about to tap a random pony's shoulder... when Pinkie suddenly calls out "R-rarity?"
The two other ponies swirl their heads around, spotting their unicorn friend sitting on the ground just a short distance away. Her back is turned to them, her front facing towards the closed confectionery. She is still and unmoving, and ponies are making an effort to stay clear of her.
The three friends ignore this last detail as they approach their fourth.
"Rarity?" asks Fluttershy from the air, her wings beating a slow rhythm. "A-are you okay?"
There is no immediate response. Fluttershy is about to ask again, when Rarity's mouth opens slowly. She takes a deep breath.
"... I left my store to purchase a treat for Sweetie Belle today," the fashionista finally replies after a moment, though she still refused to face her friends. "She's been ever so helpful lately, you see, so I decided that I would surprise her after school today with a gift." She waves a hoof to the side, face still obscured. "I debated making something for her, like a scarf or a dress... but I decided I would appeal to her sweet tooth instead this time, to be different... I'm not very good in that department though, ha, so Sugarcube Corner was the obvious solution to my problem."
Silence.
"... And?" Applejack inquires nervously, her heart beating rapidly in her chest. 'Please don't say it. Please please please...'
"Well... then Big Macintosh appeared..."
Applejack's heart sinks.
"O-oh... a-and then, Rare?"
"..."
Rarity takes in a sharp breath of air.
"... And then, you ask...? Well..."
The unicorn finally turns around to meet her friends' eyes.
Pinkie Pie's face warps into a look of pure horror.
Fluttershy tries to hide a gasp with her hooves.
Applejack takes off her hat and hugs it close to her chest, her watery eyes now the size of saucers.
"Well," Rarity continues, her bloodied red face on full display. "Well then... 'things' happened, I'm afraid..."
The three mares are too shocked to reply.
"..." Rarity tilts her head to the side and looks at her petrified friends with a face full of just as much confusion as blood. "... Whatever is the matter, girls?"
"Y-y-y-you," Pinkie Pie sputters weakly. "Y-you've got a little something... here."
"... Pinkie Pie, you just gestured to the entirety of my face."
The party pony numbly nods her head.
"Y-yeah..."
Rarity raises an eyebrow at this, her hoof slowly rising to her face in response. She gently touches her forehead with the white appendage, unintentionally turning it a bright crimson color at its tip. Her eyes grow large as she brings the dirtied thing before her field of vision, but they just as quickly dial back into a look of calm passiveness.
"Oh... I see..." she replies in a neutral voice, staring at the blood sticking to her coat.
The three other ponies hold their breath as Rarity continues to stare. The fashionista soon notices this though and waves the hoof passingly at them in reply.
"H-heh, oh do not worry about it, ladies," she says, a weak smile now etched to her face.
"... It isn't mine."
She then, in a very ladylike fashion, vomits all over the ground and promptly passes out.
_________________
Meanwhile, atop a mountain, where a dragon once resided, two winged ponies are sitting on their rumps, licking their wounds... quite literally, in fact, in the case of the pegasus. The tip of her blue wing is firmly glued to her mouth as she tries to correct her messy plumage. While she occupies her attention with the right wing, her friend runs her horn, and its magic, over the left as soothingly as she can.
"... Anything broken?" Rainbow Dash asks, not looking up from her preening.
"No... no you appear to be just fine," Twilight replies, releasing the cyan appendage from her magical grip. "There's some bruising, but that's about it. You're flight capable."
"Awesome," the pegasus comments as she releases her other wing from her mouth and allows it to naturally fold back. "... You?"
Twilight stretches out her wings, pulls a stray feather with a burst of rough magic, and folds it back in.
"I'm about the same, though my horn feels like it's about to fall off."
"Oh... I see... that's good to hear."
"Yeah..."
"... Yeah..."
The mountaintop is silent.
"... WellthanksgottagoBYE!"
Rainbow suddenly surges forward, past the still alicorn, and prepares to take off. She stretches her wings and jumps into the air...
POP
... only to then come crashing back down right away. "W-what the...?" she asks, cranking her head backwards in an attempt to see what it is that has hampered her escape.
She stares blankly at the cause of her sudden groundbound-ness.
For those who are not in the know; one typically finds it difficult, if not impossible, to fly upon appendages made out of non-aerodynamic citrous orbs.
Oranges even more so.
Twilight blows the steam off her horn with a quick puff of air. "I warned you I would do it, Dash."
"W-well, un-do it!" the now very fruity pony demands. "This really hurts, Twi..."
"..."
The princess' eye twitches.
"... You know what hurts, Dash?" Twilight asks in a dark tone as she approaches the weather pony. "Flying on tired wings hurts, Dash. Using magic on an empty stomach hurts too."
Rainbow Dash sinks lower and lower into the ground as the alicorn bares down on her.
Twilight's voice begins to rise. "Headbutting somepony at damn near mach one hurts as well! Ha! Who knew?!"
"T-twi..."
She is ignored as Twilight continues.
"Falling on a pile of rocks from about a mile's height also really bucking hurts! Haha! Duly noted!"
It might be her eyes playing tricks on her, but Rainbow Dash swore she saw sparks flying off of Twilight's mane as her anger reached a fevered pitch. She was not able to confirm it though as the alicorn brought her face within an inch of her own, engulfing her entire vision with the sight of two bloodshot, twitchy eyes.
"But you know what really, really hurts, Rainbow?"
"W-what?"
"..."
Twilight's entire form wilts.
"... What hurts is seeing you look so hurt, yet being too tired to know what to do about it."
Taken aback by the sudden tone shift, Rainbow can only stare silently as the princess allows her wings to go slack and for her legs to finally give out. Twilight stares off into space, ignoring Rainbow as well as everything else around her.
"... It hurts," she admits. "to be this supposedly brilliant mare; to have this brain seemingly capable of solving any, if not all, problems thrown its way... yet be too fluffing tired to utilize it." Twilight looks behind her, at her saddle bags laying on the ground.
"... The cure for poison joke is in those bags," she explains. "The bags I brought with me while chasing you... the same ones that kept slowing me down during said chase... that contain the cure Big Mac needs right now... that doesn't need to be here right now, but instead with Applejack... yet I was too stupid to remember that... all I could think of was 'Friend plus Sad equals Bad'.
"Elementary math, Rainbow... that's what I've been reduced to, and I can't even do that right!" Her head now lays on the ground in a heap. "It's a miracle I didn't end up impaling you..."
Rainbow blinks.
"Wha?"
Twilight waves her off.
"N-nothing. Nothing at all."
A moment of silence passes; neither pony willing to say anything to one another.
The silence eventually gets to Rainbow Dash. As awkwardly as possible, she tries to restart the conversation she still didn't want any real part in.
"... Sooo..." she begins. "Poison joke... is that whats up with Big Mac?"
"... Eeyup," Twilight answers simply, not moving from her heap and not trusting herself enough to properly articulate the situation to Dash.
"... I-I... I thought he was a bit... 'off' today," Rainbow continues, adding an awkward laugh to the end of it.
"He made you cry," Twilight bluntly states, not even bothering to turn it into a question.
"... Yeah..." Rainbow weakly admits, the sound of it like a nail to the chalkboard that was the alicorn's heart.
Though it starts off small, a flame ignites in Twilight's being. Slowly it grants her strength, though not much more then to give her the drive to sit up again.
"Talk," she demands. "Some small corner of my sense starved mind is telling me that talking is a good thing. I'm elected to believe it."
Rainbow looks away.
"B-but I don't want to, Twi. I really don't..." A scowl appears on her face. "W-why'd you think I was flying away so fast for, huh?!" she asks frustratingly.
"Because you were being stupid," Twilight says, but then waves a hoof. "Sorry sorry; too tired to filter myself. I think I know how Big Mac feels right now... what were we saying?"
Dash's look of anger weakens for a moment as she blinks.
"... That you thought I was being stupid?"
"Oh, right. Yeah... stupid. Friends talk, Dash," she explains tiredly. "I remember that much at least."
"But I don't want to!"
"Well too fluffing bad, filly!" Twilight retaliates, her tiredness now even more prevalent. "You aren't going anywhere; not unless you'd like to blow my already fragile mind by flying on those darn things! After the things I've seen dealing with Cheerilee's now literally enchanted garden this week? I wouldn't even question it if it happened!"
"But-"
"Talk."
"But I-"
"Talk."
"I don't-"
"Talk."
"Twilight!"
"Talk."
"Stop saying that!"
"Then talk to me."
"FINE!" Rainbow screams into the air, her hooves raised and waving. "Fine... freaking fine."
Twilight sits silently as Rainbow gathers her thoughts. Her eyes dart around, trying to think of a way to avoid this... but she eventually sighs loudly and finally loosens her lips.
"... I heard what he said to Pinkie Pie..."
Rainbow expected a reaction from Twilight, but the pony remains still and unmoving, so Dash continues.
"... I was sleeping on a cloud nearby when he went off on her; telling her she was insane, warning ponies about her... it was horrible...
"When he was done and left, I was given the choice to either chase after him or to talk to Pinkie Pie. I wanted to talk to Pinkie, to see if she was okay, b-but I got so angry at Big Mac. Instead of doing the smart thing, I chased after him and stopped him right outside the park.
"I went after him the moment I landed. 'What the hay did you do that for,' is what I screamed at him. I was about to threaten him into turning around and apologizing when... w-when he started talking to me...
"... I think he was trying to explain the poison joke thing to me when he first saw me, but me talking back to him angered him so much that he started yelling back. He said... well the usual stuff about me, I guess. You know, the stuff most ponies say about me behind my back? That I'm a showoff, or that I'm a lazy loudmouth... that stuff didn't faze me. It felt bad coming from Big Mac, who I thought was my friend, but that wasn't enough to really bother me..."
Twilight roles her hoof in a circle, urging her to continue. "But...?"
Rainbow cringes, looking away.
"... B-but... then he pointed something out to me that I hadn't noticed... about the kids around town... they used to follow me everywhere, right? Hay, I even had that fan club that Scoots set up!"
"Yes I remember," Twilight replies. "It disbanded during the Mare-Do-Well incident; the first and last time I attempted to solve a friendship problem while intoxicated." The princess shakes her head. "I think the only reason the girls went along with me on that one is because they still had some lingering fears about the state of my sanity left over from the Great Smarty Pants War of two-o-eleven... but I digress."
"Y-yeah, well," Rainbow continues. "The group stopped meeting because they were all into Mare-Do-Well. After everypony admitted to it being a hoax and I apologized for the way I was acting though... why didn't that group meet up again? Scoots still loves me, no doubt, but what about everypony else?"
"I'd assume it's because your image was tarnished in their eyes, thus lowering the appeal of the group," Twilight comments, relying on cold hard logic to make up for her mental slack. "It makes sense when you think about it."
"Then what about the flag carrying tryouts?"
"... What about them?"
Rainbow huffs.
"All the fillies and colts went crazy when I flew in there, and for three straight days I received nothing but praise and admiration as I helped them all out on their routines. Twilight; the children in this town love and look up to me... but then what happened to that fan club?"
Twilight's mind draws a blank. She tries not to contemplate whether or not this is due to the answer being not that obvious or another sign of her mind not working.
"... I dunno," she replies bluntly. "Maybe Scootaloo didn't have the time to set it up again or something like that?"
Rainbow shakes her head.
"Twi, no... Scootaloo tried setting it up again, but she didn't know why ponies didn't come. I didn't know either... but Big Mac did... cause he's the reason why."
"... What?"
Rainbow lowers herself to the ground, not feeling up to standing anymore and too crestfallen to find the energy to do so.
"T-that thing he does for Pinkie?" Rainbow says. "That thing where he warns ponies about her? He... h-he used the Mare-Do-Well crud as ammo to do the same with me. Twilight, he secretly ran a smear campaign against me... a-and it worked... the children around town look up to me... but their parents tell them to stay as far away as possible..."
Twilight is too stunned to reply...
"He... he what?!"
... though not for a lack of trying.
"I... I... what?!" Twilight stomps a hoof. "That makes no sense! Why would he do something like that?!"
"H-he felt obligated, because..." Rainbow tries to answer, but the words don't come easily to her. Once they do though, they are no easier to say. "B-because while kids looking up to Pinkie Pie might end up eating one too many cupcakes or do something that annoys their parents... kids looking up to me might get themselves k... k-k-killed..."
Whatever snappy response Twilight was about to say dies on her lips as she watches her strong and brave friend lower her head to the ground and begin to shake.
"I-I-I never r-really thought about it b-but..." the mare's eyes begin to water "T-t-that's sorta how I started out, Twi; I imitated the Wonderbolts that were in service when I was a filly and got awesome b-because of that." She looks away as tears begin to fall. "B-but there's a big difference between being a pegasus filly in Cloudsdale and being a pegasus filly in P-ponyville; we're trained way, way early in flight safety. We know how to correct ourselves during spin-outs and how to tuck and roll during crashes... Scootaloo doesn't know how to do that stuff though; n-none of the kids here do!
"Y-yet they still watch me up there, doing my tricks, seeing me all 'cool' and 'awesome'... w-what the hay have I been telling them? 'Hey kids! If this doesn't crack your skull right the buck open it'll look so flipping cool!' I-is that what I've been telling them, Twi? I-if it is, then I'm a t-terrible pony..."
Rainbow Dash begins sniffing loudly, but this does not lessen the amount of tears leaving her face and splattering on the ground.
Twilight steps forward and places a foreleg around the athlete.
"Rainbow, I didn't know kids meant that much to you..."
Rainbow sniffs. "T-they didn't always, but as I keep getting closer to my dream, I'm starting to realize what kind of e-example I'm setting. I used to think being a Wonderbolt only meant flying fast, but it's also about inspiring ponies to be great themselves, r-right?"
The princess couldn't help but smile.
"That's absolutely right, Dash. You seem to understand that way better than even the Wonderbolts' current roster."
A sigh leaves Dash's lips. "Too little to late though; I've already p-poisoned all the colts and fillies in this town."
"Now that's absolute horseapples and you know it."
"But Twi-"
"What else did Big Mac say to you?"
"... What?"
"The Rainbow Dash I know is tougher to crack then this," Twilight argues. "Where's the Rainbow Dash who took completely and utterly failing a mock test before she wised up? Where's the Rainbow Dash who didn't quit the Wonderbolts until all her friends were put into serious life-threatening peril? Where's the Rainbow Dash who sold her friend into slavery for a book?"
Rainbow frowns.
"Twi, none of those sound like compliments."
"... Note to self; don't attempt enlightening speeches while being dead tired." Twilight looks Rainbow in the eyes. "Nonetheless; what else did Big Mac say to upset you? Tell me so that I can systematically point out the crap for what it is."
"Twilight..."
"Do it, Rainbow. Tell me."
"... H-he feels sorry for Scootaloo. He knows her parents aren't always around, so she's never been properly warned about me..."
"Horseapples," Twilight states. "She loves you like the sister she never had and you in turn do the same. You'd never let her get hurt because of your actions. Next."
"... He thinks my dream is 'the very definition of hypocritical'. I encourage ponies to be loyal to their friends, b-but when the day comes when I do become a Wonderbolt, I'm going to have to leave all you girls, and Ponyville, behind..."
"Horseapples the Second," Twilight says. "We would give you our blessing without a second thought, knowing full well that you will always be there for us in our darkest hours. Next."
"... I come from old money. My cloud mansion costs, like, a mill-"
Twilight slams her hoof down. "Stopping you right the buck there, Dash. Horseapples the Third; Big Mac, neigh, no-freaking-pony has the right to tell you or your family how to spend their money. Nopony. Did he try some version of the 'starving Zebras in Zebrica' line on you?"
"... He said the bits spent on my birthaversary alone could have fed Appleloosa for four winters..."
A loud groan emanates from Twilight's open mouth. She places a hoof over her face. "Celestia above... Dash, I was the one who helped you organize the finances for that thing. Do you remember what it was going to look like before Cheese Sandwich showed up?"
Rainbow pauses.
"... It was small, yet big enough for everypony to have a good time."
"Right," Twilight weakly smiles. "That's right; you wanted something that appealed to everypony in town, not just yourself, and you told me that bits weren't an issue to you. It was only because of your blessing that Cheese and Pinkie were able to expand it like they did. Expand, I might add, in a way that you had no control over.
"Yet you still paid for it all, Rainbow." Twilight adds. "It was big and expensive, yes, but you couldn't bear to reign in Pinkie's enthusiasm. She was sooo happy about that, remember? It was only because of you that she was able to express her love and happiness to the fullest in the medium she treasures so much; partying."
A hoof is firmly planted on Rainbow's slightly runny snout.
"You made that happen, Dash." Twilight goes on. "And only you could have done that; what if it were Rarity's birthaversary when Cheese Sandwich came to town? Would she be able to spend so many bits to see that the two of them were given every tool imaginable? Knowing her she would try, without a doubt, but then she'd be in debt up to her fake eyelashes for the rest of her life!
"What if it were Applejack's, or Fluttershy's, huh? Both of those girls would have had to break Pinkie's poor heart, then nopony would be happy!
"... But you paid for it all, Dash. Every last bit; whether it from whatever sort of allowance your family gives you or the ones you get for your weather duties it doesn't matter. Only somepony as loyal and caring to her friends as you could have done what you did. That's how children see you, Dash. That's how I see you; as somepony worth looking up to."
Rainbow is silent.
With a small hoof pump to herself, the sleep deprived alicorn mutters "Still got it" in a low voice then resumes watching the silent mare.
"... I still should have spent them on something more worthwhile for everypony..."
Twilight frowns.
"Sooo... from what I'm hearing here; you're disappointed in your financial decisions."
"I'm disappointed in all of my decisions, Twilight."
POP
With a burst of magic, an orange gemstone suddenly appears out of the aether. It is just as quickly thrust into Rainbow's hooves with the aid of Twilight's magic.
"Well then congratulations, Rainbow Dash," Twilight says, extinguishing her horn. "You are now the new Spike."
Rainbow is confused.
"... Wha?"
"Spike had this same exact problem at the Equestrian Games," explains the princess. "The very, same, problem... I'm going to tell you the same darn thing I told him; you keep saying you let everypony down, but I keep saying you didn't. You know who's the only pony disappointed in you is, Dash? You. And only you can make it right with you again. What would that take, Dash?"
"... I... I don't know..."
Twilight frowns once again, only to then immediately sigh. With another burst of magic, the gemstone cradled in Rainbow's forelegs disappears in a flash of purple light. A similarly colored object soon takes its place.
"Rainbow, listen." Twilight begins as she steps towards the mountain's edge. With one last burst of magic, Rainbow's orange warts disappear and her blue wings reappear. "I don't know what else I can do for you right now; my mind can't come up with a solution and I'm afraid I can't lend you an ear anymore... I need to get this cure to Big Mac as soon as possible. Every moment I linger here is another pony like you being hurt.
"But, listen," she adds, facing her friend one last time. Twilight points a hoof at the object in Rainbow's grip. "Snuggle or talk to or do whatever it is you need to do with that to start feeling like yourself again and then meet us all in town as soon as you can. I don't know what's going on now, but there's two things I will always know for sure.
"One; we'll need your help in some form or another.
"And two; you'll be there for us when we need you.
"... Goodbye, Rainbow. See you soon."
Twilight Sparkle disappears in a flash of magic...
... only to then reappear three feet directly up. She corrects herself with her wings and instead decides to fly back home. "Easier to summon than to teleport, dummy" she mutters to herself as she slowly vanishes into the distance.
The mountaintop is quiet.
In the silence, Rainbow sets the object in her arms down onto the stone's cold surface. She stares at the fluffy thing.
Scootaloo, in turn, stares back.
"..."
"..."
"... Um... aren't you supposed to be in school right now, squirt?"
Scootaloo shrugs.
"Aren't you supposed to be at work?"
"... Heh... h-heh... y-you got me there, kiddo. Heh..."
The young filly is taken aback by her idol's response. Approaching her carefully, Scootaloo places one of her much smaller hooves over Rainbow's much bigger one.
"Rainbow Dash?" the orange pegasus asks. "What's wrong?"
Rainbow looks away.
"N-nothing's wrong, Scoots. Just... j-just grown-up stuff."
Scootaloo doesn't buy it.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
Dash shakes her head.
"N-nah, Scoots. I... I really don't... I don't want to seem lame..."
"But, Rainbow; I've been lame before," the tiny pony is quick to point out. "And you helped me out both times it happened!"
"But-"
"Please," Scootaloo quickly adds, her purple eyes large and pleading. "C-can't I return the favor for you? Just this once?"
Rainbow Dash makes the horrible mistake of looking into Scootaloo's eyes. She quickly turns away. "B-but..."
"Please?" Scootaloo asks once more with the true feeling only a child could drum up.
"B-but... but I don't... you'll just... I-I'm..."
After a hard fought uphill battle against the forces of willpower and need, need finally comes away victorious.
"... Ah fluff it, " Rainbow curses, finally relenting under the tiny filly's not so tiny heart. "C'mere, sis."
Scootloo happily accepts the embrace.
And there was much sisterly bonding and feels to be had.
Meanwhile, in Cheerilee's classroom...
With a loud spit, the green furred substitute teacher releases her mouth's grip on the piece of chalk and allows it to drop to the blackboard's tray. The pegasus admires her mouthwork briefly before quickly moving over to the most relevant portion of the notes. She had no time to waste; Cheerilee's classroom had fallen behind in the past week due to their teacher's botany caused vacation. Though the mare was still in town, somewhere, the fact of the matter was that her students minds were anywhere but here, where it truly mattered.
"Class," the red-headed mare pipes up from the board. "Who here can present to me the answer to our current problem?"
She is met with silence.
"... Anypony? Anypony at all?" she asks over her shoulder. With a sigh she turns aroud. "For goodness sake, children! You need to pay mor-"
Words die on the pony's lips as her eyes are drawn to the center of the classroom, where everypony else's eyes are also drawn.
An empty desk lies in the middle of the once packed classroom; all that remain of its former occupant were the stray orange feather here and there and a suspiciously star-shaped scorch mark in the chair itself.
"M-m-m-misses substitute?" asks Apple Bloom, her small foreleg raised nervously. "Ah think Scootaloo exploded..."
The teacher is silent.
"... Huh... third time in my career..."
With the shake of her head, she returns to her lecture plan.
"Now, students; we can't allow Miss Loo's life choice to spontaneously combust distract us on our quest to better prepare ourselves for standardized testing! Let us resume; who here has the answer to the problem? Miss Tiara? Mister Weight? M-... Miss Belle; please refrain from crying while in my classroom."
The teacher sighs.
"Honestly now; foals these days..."
Oh my goodness. Mac that was cruel. I mean cruel. By the end of this story I predict all the elements of harmony will be crying. AppleJack, Pinkie, Rainbow, and Rarity down Twilight and Fluttershy to go.
Okay...you just went epic here! Your writing is excellent for such a comedic piece.
Will happily wait for more.
You know I can guess what he said to Rarity, the usual stuff about her being stuck up we all think plus one big bombshell none of us could guess, but I've got no clue what he's gonna say to Twilight.
HOLY SHIT WHAT IF CELESTIA SHOWS UP TO TRY AND FIX THIS?!
Hoo, Big Mac hasn't just crossed some lines, he's just about hurtled past them! Don't think an "I'm sorry" or a Pinkie Party is going to save him when all is said and done.
Geez. One kid spontaneously combusts and the entire class panics. In my day, it took at least three students to phase us.
Also, I am thinking that's Big Mac's blood on Rarity's face. I wonder if she gored him with her horn. If so, then he has a gaping wound.
i am not sure how Mac is going to be able to live in Ponyville anymore, even with the cure and an explanation. .
I don't know what's worse, the substitute's casual dismissal of a student spontaneously vanishing or Twilight treating scootaloo like a stuffed toy she can shove into a mare's hooves. (I guess it fits though, given that Twilight thinks that levitating her friends around like rag dolls is a perfectly normal and reasonable thing to do)
He's already said what he thinks of Fluttershy. He likes her plot.
5032448
5032669 Fine then. We need him to talk to Twilight to top things off. Man I think though Mac has gone too far with Pinkie, Rainbow, and probably Rarity.
5032704 I disagree entirely.
Ignoring how bad everyone feels for them, he's kind of right. At the very least about Rainbow Dash. She admitted as much.
"M-m-m-misses substitute?" asks Apple Bloom, her small foreleg raised nervously. "Ah think Scootaloo exploded..."
The teacher is silent.
"... Huh... third time in my career..."
5032704
I think the topping off the story will be the confrontation between Applejack and Big Mac.
Also, Discord went too far by teleporting Mac into Sugarcube Corner.
I can't help but feel that this became a lot, lot less comedy, especially now that blood has been shed.
5032669
Considering this is post season four I'm surprised the author didn't have Mac didn't tear Fluttershy a new one for talking AJ into giving up the orchard to create a breeding ground for a bunch of apple-locust bats that would eventually expand and eat the family out of business. The last time a swarm of them were in town, they caused a famine.
: Pests that have nearly starved the town to death in the past need food too after all.
: Well let's see you feed them some of your damn apples that your working your ass off to grow and yet still have a farm that's in danger of foreclosure every winter!
5032770
Well poison joke does make you miserable ya know. Mac doesn't say these things cause he cares and doesn't want to hurt anypony. Also we must consider sometimes something terrible seems true about someone but really ins't and that just because something WAS true doesn't mean it still is. Mac warning filles and foals off from Rainbow was the wrong choice clearly, he could have appealed to her to IMPROVE her behavior. He's not OC or even a bad guy for making the wrong call in this case.
Umm I am the only one concerned that the substitute teacher had 2 students previously spontaneously explode in class?
5032859 Who's blood though is the question. Also we need Mac to tell Twilight what he thinks of her, before this ends.
Truth hurts but it also heals. It's amazing what hindsight can hide from you when you think about it.
I'm trying to come up with an idea of how I would react to seeing one of my freinds explode in a ball of light...
Hmm...
Anywho! Keep up the good work mister/missus author
I need help figuring out why I like the thought of Scootaloo exploding.
I'm calling.... Applejack is adopted.
5032770
Because going around behind peoples backs and telling them to have their children avoid a person like that persons a common pedophile.
Yeah that sounds like a great idea , that he might have stretched the truth about things. Apparently Big Mac is one of those with some bad opinions that prefers people being shunned rather then know, and when it finally comes to it Rainbow is bad enough that she'd rather practically kill herself then bring it up ever again because he likely put it as cruel as he could with how he's been.
How is this going to have ANY sort of happy ending that isn't dues ex machina? And isn't dark?
Wow, good chapter. And holey smoses, all the blood.
Now to see what he has to say to Applejack, or Twilight. dun dun dun.
Man, god forbid Celestia visited town.
5032859
Hmmm, yes, Discord teleporting Big Mac into Sugarcube corner WAS pretty cruel wasn't it?
Just one question though...
... when did I ever say Discord knew about the poison joke?
... Think I'll just leave that there and be on my way
5032552 Three? You yougins go Crazey over the smallest things. In my day it took five kids combusting and a presidential assassination to get us to care. And that's only in elementary!
Fistpumping for days.
5032897 Because CHICKEN GO BOOM
:| *slow clap* XD You magnificent bastard. This entire chapter was a work-up to that line, wasn't it?
Does ..... does this mean Scoots is now an alicorn in this fic? D:
5032908
*Cracks knuckles* Challenge Accepted.
Huh. The Rainbow Dash reveal was... kind of disappointing, actually. "You're thoughtless and a dangerously bad influence on children" wasn't quite the character assassination I was hoping for.
Oh well. Here's looking forward to Rarity's story!
At least they can find Mac more easily now. All they have to do is follow the blood trail!
5032704
Well, of course he's gone too far. That's the whole idea.
5032809
You don't understand people if that's what you think. Look at Rainbow Dash. The girls wouldn't have bothered with Mare Do Well if Rainbow Dash would LISTEN TO WORDS. Rainbow Dash is the kind of person who deceives herself to inflate her self-confidence and ego into a sense of being always right.
She can barely sit still for important lectures, you think she's gonna sit there when they're trying to make her admit something she refuses to even let herself realize? She's running from herself constantly.
Everything Big Mac's said has been true to as far as he knows the facts. He's right, foals who try to imitate Rainbow Dash are probably going to end up dead. It's amazing SHE isn't dead yet. He was also right about her money. What's she doing with it? She lives in a million bit mansion, she spent loads of money on Pinkie for her own birthday. She -should- feel bad about that, especially considering there's folks out there starving and dying and working themselves to the bone and she has no actual use for that much cash. She has a job as the weather manager, surely that doesn't pay pennies. Plus she's off to become a Wonderbolt, that's big league pay since it's apparently the highest national sports team. She is actually pretty thick when it comes to this sort of thing, which is probably why she didn't get Generosity.
Also, warning ponies about Pinkie actually lets them have a chance to get their guards up, which means they're more able to tolerate her than if she just came out of nowhere and they had no idea what to expect. If anything, he's probably saved her a lot of heart break and having her nose broken.
No doubt whatever he said to Rarity was the damned truth. Probably something to do with leading Spike on or being a pedophile if she's NOT leading him on, the fact she's actually a country girl and not some high-society prima donna like she wishes she was.
Truth hurts. No one likes to hear the things they deny to themselves. The things they force themselves to forget about. The things they REFUSE to admit no matter what. But guess what? That doesn't stop it from being true. Sometimes it's time to stop running from it, take your licks, and get over yourself.
And the girls do need to get over themselves. They're all crazy in their own ways.
Big Mac is the victim here. He can't stop himself from saying what he thinks. Is he going to be blamed for his private thoughts and observations? Can any of you hold him accountable for what goes on in his head, when no doubt you think the same or worse about your friends and family and people around you but never say it? How can anyone put Big Mac in the fire for this when he's the same as any of us? He's been mistreated for something he can't help and wishes he could stop, and he's being shat on in the comments. Unless Ponyville comes to the realization that he's right and they all have some inner demons to conquer in order to finally own up to their personal faults, Big Mac is going to be ostracized and berated for the rest of his life. Probably stop buying his apples too, which will hurt his family. It's lunacy.
5032908 Again, putting aside how you feel bad for them, he's right. Her stunts and bragging could inspire the children who look up to her to try stuff that could get them hurt, paralyzed, or worse. It doesn't matter in canon because, you know, magical cartoon world.
It's the lesser of two evils. The safety of those children is far more important than any pain Rainbow Dash might feel if she ever learns of it. And it's not like he was going around telling lies about her.
5032973
Eh, can't win them all I guess. I felt that attacking something Rainbow loves, showing off, and making reference to her canon character growth was the best route to go for Big Mac's rant. I thought it would be realistic, as it DOES take a lot to really bother Dash.
I could have gone a few decimals darker, sure, but then I would have had to put the dark tag on this thing. Plus, I'm not sure I could have given Mac something too outrageously dark and still make him in character.
I need him to keep being himself for the future talks with you-know-which-two-ponies to work the way I want them to work
Besides; this way I was able to start adding FEELS to the story. to balance out the dark. What better way to do that then with some good old Scootalove?
5032986
Try not to frustrate yourself too much. I could count on my fingers and toes the number of people I've seen on FIMFIC who take things at more than face value's presentation, and can make considerations without their subjective and emotional bias poisoning every aspect. In the end they all end up defending their personal feelings on the subject because they don't know how to defend a logical point with objective and subjective supporting factors, rather than making the subjective factor the actual point.
5032983
5032986
You both really get it.
5033056
Thank you for the oh so subtle insult.
5033082
You've seen me about. If I was going to insult you, it'd be a big production. If it's not, then it's not intended as an insult but rather just a byproduct of the fact I always come off as abrasive due to stream of consciousness posting. In the end, it was not my intention to offend you, and if you still choose to remain offended I divest myself of all responsibility for how you handle that. Simply know that I did not choose to insult you or demean you in any way.
5033106
Of course.
5032986
The problem is though the difference, there is a difference between telling people to have their children avoid her at all costs to educating them that some things just aren't possible for them, as it is they've chosen one where they can't even form a fanclub because they don't want them to do anything with her.
It's not a difference of avoiding doing their stunts, which would be the proper thing, they are telling them entirely to avoid her 100% like a leper and have nothing to do with her at all.
I mean you still had kids fanclubs for Evel Knievel in real life and all.
5032960
Yes... the answer is yes...
...
... Which of your questions am I answering, you ask? Well you can decide that for yourself
Woah...Big Mac is the world's biggest asshole. I mean...shit...well, he's going to get what he deserves soon enough.
5033113
Because impressionable children don't listen when told "Hey don't do this." What did any of us do when our folks told us not to do something that amazed or wowed us?
We went and did it! Or tried to and got caught, but point is we tried it anyway. By warning them to limit contact with Dash, the hero-worship thing has a harder time catching hold of them which means less chance they'll go throw themselves off a balcony trying to do crazy Dash aerial-stunts. I'd have broken fewer bones as a kid if someone had stepped in like Mac does to warn my folks to keep me away from things we didn't realize were dangerous yet
5033055
Oh, no, it was fine, and certainly didn't need to be darker. It just lacked the sense of irony that had come from Big Mac's rants so far. It was really surprising and amusing to hear Pinkie being told that her demeanor and recklessness can be so obnoxious that she's a bad influence on kids. And Caramel being told that he's such a loser that other ponies want to hang out with him so they can feel better about themselves was hilarious. And then of course there's Fluttershy, who got a bit of sexual harassment and then was left alone.
Instead Rainbow just got "You're a bad pony and here's all the reasons why". It works, but it's not comedy. That's what I meant.
5033143
And? That doesn't sound like logical thinking because kids will do stupid things anyways to prove themselves to friends or just because they want to.
I've seen kids break bones because they just wanted to, thought they could do something, the only way to protect some kids if they want to be stupid is to put em in a bubble and even then I'm certain they'll figure out a way.
At the time it just seems like spite for most of Rainbow Dash's things, like the money. If you have wealth it is yours to give and take for example, but apparently to him you don't deserve a thing, now give it up. I don't like you and think everyone should be protected, so you'll never know why people are avoiding you.
Maybe she says that because she's tired, or maybe it's a typo, who knows Pointing it out anyway
Given Rarity's state and the early closing of Sugarcube Corner........I'm thinking Big Mac seriously injured himself so he wouldn't start talking there.
Though now I'm starting to wonder if Discord wasn't behind this all along as a way of creating some social chaos while the encroaching Everfree magic serves as excellent cover/camoflauge.
5033173
No one's stated Big Mac is trying to keep children from ever harming themselves. That wasn't part of this story or discussion. The issue is that the hero-worship they had of Dash during the Mare Do Well incident was so hyped up that the likelihood of foals getting themselves hurt, maimed, or killed trying to emulate their utterly reckless and nearly suicidal hero was too high to be safe.
You're also making unnatural assumptions on Mac's reasoning. "Apparently to him you don't deserve a thing, now give it up"... Was that even implied by extrapolation? No.
But when you're living in a million dollar house that you didn't earn, sitting on a dragon's hoard of cash you don't deserve, then yeah - you could probably do some good with it instead of spending it on leisure and japery. When you have a job that should give you all you need and you just... have too much cash sitting about. I mean, are there no charities around? No orphans? The starving and poor and needy who can't get help because everyone's too poor or miserly to assist? Turning a blind eye to that sort of person so you don't have to open your obscenely bulging purse is a bit on the bad karma side. Can you blame someone who works hard for everything he has and appreciates it all the more for the blood, sweat, and tears to feel that way? Have you earned things with your sweat, your dedication, violence and pleading? Then just watched some rich prat walk by with more and better because his parents offloaded a lot of cash onto him?
Can we really blame him for that thought and observation? The Apples seem quite generous, despite that they only seem to just get by. Meanwhile, if we go based on Big Mac's observations, Rainbow Dash is hardly generous at all. The argument "It's hers she can do what she wants with it" doesn't actually mean anything, it's just a way to shut down people who point out that doing something good with your excess is far more preferable than simply hoarding it and making out like Scrooge McDuck.
5033167
Ah. Well, er... okay. Here's the deal... not a BIG spoiler, but not something I want somepony casually reading if they glance by... While we ARE going to still see quite a few more comedic speeches along the way, we're now entering the rocky territory. Next chapter WILL contain what I consider to be the harshest, most unfair rant in the story. It was originally going to be shown in it's entirety. but I have since decided against it. One thing is for sure though; it's not something I'm going to make light of easily... and it's still nowhere near as sad as the ones I have planned for Applejack... and Cheerilee.
The story will NOT be receiving dark and sad tags, as I truly believe I will be able to end this fic on that increasingly difficult to obtain high-note... but the real challenge will be keeping it's comedic nature. Wish me luck
Whelp, this is a VERY interesting read... and after reading up to the current chapter, (Eight) I think it's safe to say Big Mac deserves an orange spiral mask. He seems to be able to break people faster than Tobi.
5033238
Ugh the mare do well incident, that was just one poorly written episode in general and I wish I could ignore it, but at the same time while they followed her around not once did those kids actually try and perform the stunts she did.
Also as for "It's hers and she can do what she wants with it" as a shutdown technique..I mean yeah, it's pretty much the end all of it. Could she do more with it? Most likely, but Big Mac was trying to guilt her over things she had purchased with things she could have, but she doesn't have to. Doing it out of guilt or otherwise isn't generosity it's just become an obligation.
Also it's hard to believe Equestria even has tons of orphans around or tons of poor, which is mostly headcanon but we haven't seen much in the way for many to be in that manner. Also all that seems pretty emotionally manipulative rather then logical, rich prat really? Some families will be richer then others due to various things and while envy is a natural response thinking like that is rather toxic.
5033195
Totally because she's tired, I assure you
5033295
All these assumptions... for one, that was a fine episode. Anyone familiar with dealing with obstinate persons of the sort who lie to themselves consistently in order to keep up a facade (mostly for themselves) understand that people like Rainbow Dash need to be /shown/ what they're doing wrong because they will damn near fight to prevent the words reaching their brain. Or literally fight, as a bloody nose once showed me before I could get through to a friend who is a good deal like our chromatic speedster.
Of COURSE they didn't try it on the screen. It is a show for little girls. You think they're going to show more than the CMC doing their should-be-deadly stunts? Or the fact that anyone attempting these things should be getting hurt? The show has rules to follow and a theme to stick to. We don't deal with cartoon physics much here. We deal with extrapolation and world-building, that is what we do. Expanding upon the canon and then through plausibility's graces do we flesh out how things should have happened with all those limiters off and a dose of realism that conforms to basic and situational laws of the continuity. No points for that.
It's not an end all. Big Mac was not trying to guilt her with anything. HE IS CURSED TO SPEAK WHAT HE THINKS INSIDE OF HIS HEAD AND NEVER TELL ANYONE. That is the whole point of this story! You -literally- just made it up in your head that he was /trying/ to guilt anyone at all. He has no brain-mouth filter. How many things have you thought about your friends and family that you'd just wish you could curl up and die if they ever found out you thought about it? Uncomfortable sexual thoughts? How much you hate something they do? How they seem like assholes when they could be better? No point in denying it, it's simple human nature. We're all the same, and many will deny it. They're lying to themselves and you. No points
Who said tons of orphans? Just because there's not a thousand orphans sitting in Ponyville doesn't mean the ones who -are- there don't deserve some charitable aid. "Sorry kid, no food today. That rich lady down the road doesn't care that there's only three of you. When there's a hundred she'll start donating." No poor? We've seen the rich and wealthy elite, if there is a rich elite class, there is a poor class - and it is many times larger by all financially-focused societal models No points.
Yes, they will be richer than others due to various things. And they could do good with the money passed down through the family instead of buy themselves a load of pointless crap. There was a time in my life I had more money than I knew what to do with, and then there's now, when I eat a bit of bread every other day to make sure my family has enough to not complain about hunger and make sure the bills stay paid. I know what it's like on both sides of the coin, because I've lived and I am experienced.
Is she obligated to do this? No. She's gone this long without helping out the downtrodden, no need to start now, eh? But do keep in mind that Big Mac was not attacking her. He was not trying to guilt her as you said, which is an invention of your own. He made an observation in his head, a valid observation from his point of view, and one that even Dash could see was actually more than a bit true. That she COULD have done more for others instead of being so focused on herself. He made this observation in private, and never would have told her willingly. But now he has no choice. No points.
In the end, Big Mac remains the victim. He is not trying to hurt ponies, he is being forced to say what he thinks and has observed. You may not agree, but it's not up to you, and it's not up to me. This is what's going on and that's the end of it.
5033396
I know he's cursed by it, I did not mean to imply as I know it is (Because I lost myself emotionally you see ), but still as for the first you are making an assumption about rainbow dash throughout that episode considering they not once talked to her at all over it.
I don't however agree he is fully a victim in this, while being forced to say everything is indeed a curse, the thoughts are his own and if you really think so lowly of everyone that is on you, but I suppose I've rambled enough on things, I'll concede on the monetary value as I've never had that much to spend but I still don't believe people should be obligated to do good or bad with it, it's on the onus of the owner to do what they will.