He raced into the darkened corridor, his talons scraped across the marble floor as he came to a stop in front of the throne.
“Ma’am, our spy has returned.” He stated, out of breath. His wings heaved up and down with his furry chest.
“Good. What news has he gleaned?” Her voice is cold as she stared at him with her golden eyes narrowing. She sat; her silhouette was daunting as it cascaded over the floor.
“The rumors are true.” He collected his breath as he patted his ruffled feathers back into place on top of his head. “Rainbow Dash is broken. The Elements of Harmony are crippled.” He explained to her.
“Excellent. Alert Captain Graywing. Our time is nigh.” She smiled.
--
The little cyan filly looked up at Twilight Sparkle, questioning why only a few minutes ago she stood closer to the purple alicorn’s height. The five mares, one filly and one dragon stood in one of the large hallways of the Canterlot castle. Only a few moments ago a full-grown pegasus mare entered the room in which they stood before. She was now replaced with a pint-sized filly.
The large oak door opened and a weary Celestia appeared. Twilight knew she was exhausted from casting the age spell on Rainbow Dash. That kind of spell took a lot of energy to perform and it was lost on no one that Celestia needed rest. The sun goddess still smiled however.
“I can call my guard to get you a carriage to take you back to Ponyville.” She informed them.
“That’s awfully nice of ya Princess.” Applejack responded. Twilight had a thousand yard stare, emotions were swirling through her like a tornado of uncertainty. This look wasn’t unfamiliar to Celestia as she knew her student well. She nuzzled Twilight before she turned and walked down the hallway. Twilight listened as her mentor’s golden horseshoes clicked against the marble floor until they faded out of earshot.
“Mommy. Mommy. Mommy!” the filly tugged at Twilight’s legs and pulled her out of her internal struggle.
“What?” She turned to the small filly who looked up at her with her rose-colored eyes.
“Can we go home now?” She asked, whining a bit.
“I’m sure that we will be escorted home soon dear.” Rarity chimed in, noticing that Twilight’s mind wasn’t totally put together.
I’m basically a single mother now. How do I deal with this? Twilight’s mind was racing. What do I tell other ponies who ask? What will happen to the Elements of Harmony? Can I run the library, be a princess, and raise a foal on my own? How will I pay for this? Sure there’s the stipend Celestia gives me to live on and including the small wage of being a librarian I guess I could rework my budget allowance. What do I do about-
“Twilight!” Rarity’s voice intruded on her thoughts like a spear slicing through the air.
“Huh?” Twilight shook her head as she looked at her dumbfounded friends.
“You alright sugarcube?” Applejack asked, coming up and placing a hoof on her shoulder in concern.
“Oh…yeah…” Twilight muttered back, her mind still obviously unsettled.
“Spike,” Rarity turned to the dragon who still stood by her side. “Could you take Dash to see the balcony? I’m sure she’d love to see Canterlot from here.” She offered. Spike raised a scaly eyebrow in confusion, but Rarity just waved her head down the hall and he took the hint.
“C’mon Dash.” Spike led the filly down the hallway. All of the mares watched until the pair turned the corner and disappeared.
“Alright, what’s goin’ on in your head now?” Applejack turned and asked after she was sure they were gone.
“Yeah you’ve been acting all loco!” Pinkie Pie chirped causing Applejack to glare at her. Twilight sighed heavily and looked at her hooves in reservation of telling them her concern.
“I’m fine.” She put a fake smile on her face as she looked at them. All of her friend’s faces expressed the look of doubt Twilight was found out.
Twilight fell to her flank, “I don’t know what to do. This all happened so fast and I don’t think I’m ready to be a single mother!” Hot tears started to well in her eyes.
“You won’t be, silly!” Pinkie Pie giggled, bouncing up next to the distraught alicorn. “You got us to help!”
“I’ll have to agree with Pinkie Pie on this one dear.” Rarity nodded her head as she walks up to Twilight and nuzzled her empathetically.
“Yeah! We can be her aunties!” Pinkie Pie gasped with the excitement of the idea. Applejack dramatically rolled her eyes as Fluttershy smiled a bit.
“That makes me sound so old!” Rarity harped as Applejack threw her hoof to her face.
“But Pinkie Pie is right. We’d love to help you.” Fluttershy’s soft voice rose.
“Thanks you guys.” A smile grew on Twilight’s face, eternally grateful for her friends.
“And besides! I’ve always wanted to be an auntie!” Pinkie Pie giggled. “Though I did always think Fluttershy would foal first…” She tapped her hoof to her chin as Fluttershy just blushed a deep red.
“Princess Sparkle?” A voice asked from behind them. All of the girls turned around to see a light orange pegasus stallion dressed in the traditional royal guard armor. He wore a familiar smile that Twilight recognized. “I’m here to escort you and your friends to a carriage.” He stated with a smile. Twilight felt her face grow hot with a blush.
“Oh, uh yeah.” Twilight stammered. Rarity raised an eyebrow noticing Twilight’s strange behavior. “Let me just go get Dashie…” Twilight backed away nervously before bolting down the hallway to find Rainbow Dash and left the rest of them stunned. Twilight turned down a hallway find Rainbow Dash and Spike on a balcony at the end. Rainbow Dash had her hooves on the ledge, looking down precariously at the city beneath her. Twilight slowed down and walked up to them calmly. “Ready to go home?”
“Yes!” Spike smiled, as he looked to Twilight relieved.
“No.” Rainbow Dash responded, not even looking at Twilight but still enamored by the bustling city below.
“Well we’re going home now.” Twilight stated matter-of-factually, she wasn’t going to play Dash’s little games. Twilight turned around as if she was going to leave without her. Spike hesitated before following Twilight’s lead. Twilight smiled, putting her plan into action as she started walking away slowly giving Rainbow Dash time to react. And, just as according to plan, she heard light hooves scampering after her.
“No Mommy!” Rainbow Dash ran after Twilight, her wings extended frantically.
“Well we’re leaving.” Twilight tried to hide her triumphant smile.
“No, I don’t wanna!” Rainbow Dash grabbed a hold of Twilight’s tail with her mouth in attempts to stop her; she didn’t even slow the alicorn down as she kept on marching down the hall. As Twilight turned the corner she sees her friends, all of them looking confused as they see the little rainbow-maned pegasus filly trying to put the brakes on the alicorn trudging towards them.
“She doesn’t want to go home now.” Twilight rolled her eyes, answering the unasked question. The stallion guard looked confused but nodded, Twilight tried to hide her blush.
“Follow me then.” He stated and led the group out of the castle to a waiting carriage. It was beautiful and white; something Celestia herself had probably rode in before. It was led by two pegasi Royal Guards, standing diligently at attention. Rarity let herself in first, taking the opportunity to pretend she was a princess herself.
Everyone else got in after her and once again, they took to the sky. Just like on the trip to Canterlot, Rainbow Dash raced to the window to see the world pass them by. Twilight kept her eye on the smaller pegasus for it was now entirely plausible for her to fall out of the window.
“I must say I do like getting the first class treatment.” Rarity remarked, admiring the regal-looking carriage, adorned with intricate (and a bit gaudy) carvings in the wood and the detailed (albeit tacky) upholstery on the benches.
“I prefer the train myself.” Applejack kept her eyes on the floor, not daring to look out the window. It was obvious to everyone that she was nervous about flying. Rainbow Dash had her small wings extended to let the air tickle her feathers and whip her messy mane. Fluttershy thought it was cute and she giggled.
Soon they all landed just outside of Ponyville with a jerk of the carriage. Applejack looked relieved to be back on the ground. Rainbow Dash bounced impatiently on her hooves, anxious to get out.
Twilight lit her horn to open the door for the anxious filly who jumped out of the carriage. The rest of them stepped out and Twilight thanked the pegasi guard before they take off back to Canterlot.
By now it was early afternoon in Ponyville and the town was bustling with activity. Twilight swallowed her nervousness as she looked around the town. Her anxiety didn’t go unnoticed by her friends.
“Twilight, you’ll be alright.” Fluttershy whispered, placing a comforting wing over the slightly shaking alicorn. Rainbow Dash flapped her tiny wings and hovered off the ground, obviously happy to have fresh air and reminding Fluttershy of a hummingbird.
“Thanks Fluttershy.” Twilight smiled gratefully to her friend. Suddenly, all of them heard Spike’s stomach growl. He grinned sheepishly and Applejack chuckled.
“Ah’m a bit hungry too. C’mon ya’ll I’m sure Granny has somethin’ cooked up for lunch. And Ah’m sure she won’t mind the company.” Applejack offered.
“We don’t want to intrude dear…” Rarity said politely.
“It ain’t a problem!” Applejack started walking towards the farm.
“Woohoo!” Pinkie Pie bounced as they started taking the most direct route to Sweet Apple Acres, right through the center of Ponyville.
Twilight hesitates as she walks, watching Rainbow Dash buzz by her and fly by Pinkie Pie as the two led the pack to the apple farm. She hangs back as they walk through town, Twilight noticed with hypersensitivity all of the whispers and stares from the citizens. Her ears drooped a bit, knowing it’s about her friend. Of course, Rainbow Dash herself was oblivious to the background banter, she just giggled with Pinkie Pie as they approached the farm.
Applejack rushed ahead and opened the front door once they get to the farmhouse. Immediately Twilight was greeted with the wonderful smells of a home cooked meal wafting through the air and tickling her nose.
“You’re home!” Granny Smith’s voice called out from the kitchen.
“Heya Granny, be sure to set the table for a few more.” Applejack responds, walking into the kitchen where Granny Smith was cooking, along with the help of Applebloom, Big Macintosh and Sweetie Belle who had stayed the night. Rainbow Dash followed Applejack into the kitchen, also drawn by the tantalizing smells.
The familiar filly caught the eye of the Apple family. Twilight followed her, preparing for a long explanation of why one of their friends was now a pint-sized filly. Instead she saw Applebloom’s eyes brighten.
“She’s so cute!” Applebloom smiled brightly at Rainbow Dash. The filly didn’t respond and instead hovered in the air over Granny Smith’s shoulder, smelling the wonderful scent of garden vegetable soup the old mare was making.
“Shoo!” Granny Smith waved her wooden spoon at the pesky pegasus. Rainbow Dash set her hooves on the floor and walks back to Twilight. “Soup’s on!” Granny called out, even though they were no more than five feet away from her. Big Macintosh carried over a few bowls on his back for Granny Smith to pour soup and he walked back to the large table, set for eleven.
“Thank you so much for all of this.” Twilight said gratefully as she took a seat, she pulled another one out with her magic for Rainbow Dash who climbed up and sat impatiently.
“It’s no problem dearie! After everything you all have been through, why it’s the least I could do.” Granny Smith smiled as she filled the last of the bowls. Everyone else took their seats and started eating. Rainbow Dash, of course, threw her face into the bowl. Getting hot soup all over herself.
“Hot!” She yelled as she pulled her face out of the bowl. Tears well in her eyes as Twilight levitated a napkin over to her to wipe her face.
“Let it cool.” Twilight warned. Rarity tried to hide her smirk with a sip of the soup.
After lunch Twilight said her goodbyes and took Rainbow Dash home. Spike followed behind, patting his full stomach happily. The sun was starting to set as they entered the tree house.
“Alright bed time.” Twilight said, completely exhausted from the day. All she can think of is her warm inviting bed. She smiled to herself, wanting so badly to be in the cozy embrace of her blanket and pillow.
“No.” Rainbow Dash stated as she looks at Twilight with fiery defiance and Twilight frowned.
“Uhhhh…” Spike saw Twilight’s nerves starting to fray and decided to intervene before Twilight looses her temper. He looked around and finds Twilight’s saddlebags sitting by the front door. He scampered to them and rummages to pull out Rainbow Dash’s faded yellow blanket, the old one that Fluttershy had dropped off two weeks ago. “Dash,” he got the filly’s attention. “Look what I have.” He waved the blanket and Rainbow Dash immediately raced towards it, almost knocking him over in an attempt to get it in her hooves. He pulled it away from her at the last second, keeping it out of her reach.
“Gimme it!” Rainbow Dash snapped as she flew frantically around the small dragon in attempt to get the blanket between her teeth.
“You’ll get it when you go to bed.” Spike said. Rainbow Dash looked confused a bit, glancing between Spike and Twilight. She pouted before racing upstairs to go to bed.
Twilight looked to her assistant, a look of eternal gratitude on her face. “Thanks Spike.” She smiled. Spike smirked triumphantly before they all headed upstairs to get ready for bed.
They had no idea they were being watched.
hey tofu, im about to read this, but any chance we can cross link my alternate sequel and your sequel. so your fans get my chapters and my fans get yours.. i mean, have you seen the likes raising rainbow got in the first few days?
good job, I look forward to seeing where this goes.
Although, I do have to ask, it seemed like you were going a long way to make everything present tense: asks instead of asked, etc...
May I ask why? it seems like a pain in the flank. It was also a little distracting to read. (might just be me on that one.)
Also you missed one.
Unless that was on purpose?
Yes the official sequel is out! And you cover is adorable! Can't wait to see Scootaloo's reaction!
moar.
I agree with twidash all the present tense is disorienting, but I'm lookig forwardto seeing where this goes
There are now to sequels to falling backwards. That is amazing
Oh my god it's so CUTE!
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I am also curious as to the thought prosess behind this choice of tense. it makes things somewhat disjointed, each parragraph reading like an outline of events rather then a flowing narrative. Still, I enjoyed the first so I will definatly be watching to see where this goes.
OMG so cute. Nice way to start off a sequel
What do you think of the unofficial sequel?
I can't help but wonder about the conversation between Twilight and Rainbow when she's older about her accident... No doubt she'll notice pictures of her older self or overhear a comment about it at some point.
ah if only we could relive the exubarance and innocence of youth. I almost missed this story until i saw it on the front page.
This is a fun story, but it's riddled with mistakes common among inexperienced writers.
Your biggest problem is with what is called "tense", which is whether the events takes place in the past, present, or future. You need to either tell the story like you're recalling something that already happened, or tell it like you're describing it scene-by-scene as it happens. Your constant switching between the two (sometimes even within the same sentence!) is incredibly distracting.
"Looses" should be "loses".
4456294 Older sister who died in a flying accident.
Close enough when you think about it. After all the Rainbow Dash they all knew and loved died in that accident and was replaced by the filly that stands before them now.
4458013
Still... I'd imagine somepony, like Diamond Tiara, would spill the beans. She'll find out the truth eventually, and that would be an interesting conversation.
4458151 Can't be more awkward then the conversation Kenai had with Koda in Brother Bear about how he's actualy a human and was the guy who killed his mom.
You know you have watched to much ASDF when you read the first chapters title and think of this.img4.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20131210041500/slushinvaders/images/9/9e/And_Suddenly,_Pineapples!.jpg
4458013 not exactly. in our world that would be the case. in equestria there is a bit more to it. likely rainbow dash IS still in there, but those memories are dormant. these are beigns of magic after all, could well be their minds and obdies follow a few different rules.
The thing I'm wondering about is Dash's house.
this story makes me sad
Why must this tale be so sa.....
I was not about to say sad I was about to say....um....sapphire!
This story is so sapphire.....it means...... Cool and....neat?
Nope...I am not laying at all.
P.S. The first story was cool to.
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It'll be their summer home. They can use the cloud-walking spell on Spike and head up for a week or so.
Still got tensing issues that make it a bit of an awkward read.
Also lots of wrong word usage.
e.g.
Try entranced, or enchanted, or enraptured, or enamored.
Please don't take offense, but I suggest going out and getting a decent English dictionary and a thesaurus. I know there are a few good online dictionaries but an ink and paper edition will serve you well and is a good investment. Online is great for finding words you already know, or at least think you know, but nothing beats opening a dictionary to a random page and finding a new word.
Hmmm... I REALLY like this. Momma Twily and filly Dash, I really like.
i know it isn exactly the same but when rainbow found that the soup was hot it reminded me of somthing from my childhood.
Anyone else find the cover picture... mildly disturbing?
Because to me, it looks like Dash is one of these:
myhealthypassion.files.wordpress.com/2010/02/troll-doll.jpg
Rimdow dash and cuteie mark crusaders please please please that wold make this twenty precent cooler like this comment if you agree sorry for errors
Why does it keep switching the tense? Present and past?
Its the start to a really good Series. :-)
What's the main difference between this official sequel and the other? I'm interested in both but not if they're just gonna cover the same ground.
Also, seconding those who are pointing out the tense issues, they are quite distracting.
4458151 I wouldn't worry about her I'd worry about scootaloo or the cmc in general. Basically any young filly/colt/spike that knew her as a adult.
why would Twi not go to her parents for advice before leaving canterlot, also the tense being in the presnt is really distracting, I would suggest telling the story in past tense, it's how it's done 99% of the time.
4467460 eh ive seen some pretty weird stories and im not so comfortable with it anymore...
i lost my longer comment, so i just say, i hope this wasn´t Flash Sentry, and i hope she doesn´t start a romance out of nowhere.
I like it if the romance is slow paced, or at least not rushed like " look there Flash Sentry, now i go and marry him.".
I know, i know.... but i didn´t knew how to say it otherwise right now.
I prefer it if i get a real reason why they like each other, or if i can see how it happens.
However i hope this story right now is about Rainbow, and Twilight only for a while, i mean mother, and child bonding time.
6015728 It was most likely Flash Sentry. If there is some romance, you have no control over it. It's not your story.
~Dashie14~
Wait... Whaaaaaaat?
Sounds about right!
I SWEAR IF THERE IS ANY MORE SIGNS OF FLASHLIGHT THEN I WILL BE CRUSHED >:(
I do not like Flashlight ok....
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One of what?