Chapter 24: Of Abductions, Deductions, Revisions and Divisions
Fluttershy crumpled her latest writing attempt into a ball and stacked it carefully on top of the growing pile of rejects. How do I break the news? I’ve never even really told her I like mares. She huffed in frustration. She’d better not make Rarity sad, or else I’ll... She had no idea what she would do, actually. Please like her, Mommy... For once just tell me you’re happy for me.
She laid her head down on the table, sighing quietly with misery.
A concerned voice came from the other side of the library. “Fluttershy? Are you okay?” Twilight had offered to help her with her letter, but she had declined, merely asking for a quill and a single scroll. And then another scroll. And then a lot more. Things had reached the point where Twilight could no longer hold back her curiosity. She walked over to the table to find out what the pegasus was up to, looked down at the last blank sheet and cringed. Time to make another run to Quills and Sofas. “What exactly are you writing, Fluttershy? Are you sure you don't want me to help?"
Fluttershy looked up and scrambled to cover the sheet she was working on, only to relax when she realized she hadn’t written anything on it yet. “Um, I’m trying to write a letter to my mom about...” She paused, realizing that Twilight was one of the ponies who didn’t yet know that she and Rarity were dating. Well, it’s only been one date so far, but that counts, right? “Sorry, I just... Okay...” She took a deep breath. You can do this Fluttershy! “Well, uhm... you see... me and Rarity — we're sort of... together?”
Twilight took it in stoically. “Wow, okay. When did that happen?”
“Um, yesterday.”
“That’s great! But...isn’t that a little sudden?”
Fluttershy’s eyes blazed. For a split second, she could hear her mother’s voice echoing Twilight’s words, and she snapped out a quick and vehement response. “Sudden? Sudden?! Let me tell you something, missy: I’ve been trying to figure out how to let Rarity know that I loved her for years, scrambling for a way to tell her that I needed to be with her, and that I wanted to throw her onto a bed and do things with her I didn’t even know the names for. There is nothing sudden about it!”
Twilight took a nervous step backwards, making placating motions with her hooves. “Calm down, Fluttershy! I didn’t mean to say it was a bad thing. I just meant I never even got the impression you two felt that way about each other, much less that you were dating.”
The pegasus was instantly contrite for her outburst. “Oh, Twilight, I’m so sorry! I’m just really worried about having to tell my mom about Rarity...”
Twilight sat down, looking over the blank sheet. “You don’t seem to have made much of a start here.”
Fluttershy waved a hoof at the impressive-looking pile of discarded missives. “I have plenty of starts. Nothing sounds right.”
Twilight uncrumpled the top note and looked it over.
Dear Mom,
Sorry I don’t write more.
I’m doing well, Angel Bunny says hi.
I hope you and Dad are well.Oh, remember how you keep asking if I am dating?
Well, I am now. But... you said I need to find a nice stallion.
I found a nice pony... does that count?
It was followed by scribbles and slashes.
The following few showed no more promise.
Dear Mom,
I am dating a mare. Please be nice.
Dear Mom,
I need you to not be you for once.
Dear Mom,
How would you feel about going on vacation this week?
How does Las Pegasus sound? My treat!
She picked up another that wasn’t even addressed to Fluttershy’s mother.
Dear Princess Celestia,
It’s me, Fluttershy. I was wondering if you could do me a favor.
One of your guardsponies, Sergeant Posey, could really use a vacation.
Could you arrange for her to have some time off at Neighagra Falls this week?Your loyal subject, Fluttershy
The one after that would have made Celestia laugh, Twilight was sure of it.
Dear Princess Celestia,
I've recently discovered that there's a fatigue-related illness spreading throughout Canterlot, which mostly targets pegasi. As a precaution I recommend that you give all pegasus guards a mandatory week of absence.
Your faithful student, Twilight Sparkle
The writing didn't remotely resemble her own elegant horn writing, or even Spike's handwriting; the mouthwriting of the letter was so shaky it looked like it had been authored during an earthquake. Twilight would have laughed herself, if the letter hadn't made it clear just how nervous Fluttershy was. "Do you want me to write the letter for you, Fluttershy? I'm sure I could make up something that will ensure you don't have to go visit."
Fluttershy slumped back onto the table. “It wouldn’t matter. Rarity would just want to go visit her in the hospital, or on the moon, or wherever we tried to hide her.”
"But your mother is Drill Sergeant Posey, right?" Twilight smiled widely. "Then why don't we make sure she's somewhere dirty? With lots of mud and muck! That would make Rarity want to avoid her, right?"
Fluttershy’s eyes lit up for a moment, then she slumped again. “She’d just take it as a challenge to prove herself to me. I’m doomed, Twilight. I mean, I knew I’d eventually have to tell my mother about Rarity, but I figured that maybe the wedding invitation would be the most opportune time...”
Twilight laid a hoof on Fluttershy’s shoulder. “I think that might be a little late. Why don’t we just write to her and let her know what day you’ll be there, and ask her to meet you?”
Fluttershy raised her head from the table. “Maybe... I don’t have to tell her right now. Maybe I can just tell her...” She furrowed her brow, thinking hard. ”Yes. Take this down please, Twilight.”
Dear Mom,
I am coming to Canterlot tomorrow. I am dating somepony now,
and I want you and Dad to meet them. Can you please make time
around two in the afternoon?I love you both,
Shy-shy
Twilight giggled. “And I thought I was the only one saddled with a silly nickname... Oh, erm, sorry, Fluttershy.”
Fluttershy nodded however, smiling serenely. “I don’t mind, I know it’s a little foalish. I just need an envelope now, please.”
Twilight shook her head. “No, I’ll have Spike send it, and Princess Celestia will add it to her outbox to be forwarded to your mom. Goodness knows she has sent missives through me to the local government enough times; it’s only fair for me to be able to do the same, once in a while.”
Fluttershy hugged her friend suddenly, causing Twilight to squeak as the air abruptly left her lungs. “Thank you so much. I’m sorry I got upset earlier. It’s been a stressful few days...”
“N-no problem, Fluttershy. I’m just sorry I didn’t notice you were that stressed out before now. Of course, I was probably lost too deep in my own forest to pay attention to the trees around me...” Twilight stopped herself, realizing she had very nearly blurted out something she herself had sworn Pinkie to secrecy over. “Forget I mentioned that last part, Fluttershy.” She took a seat at another study table and sighed heavily. “I’ve been having a rough few days myself...”
“Are you having romantic troubles too?”
“No, no, I’m fine,” Twilight replied, with an unconvincing air of nonchalance, ”what makes you ask that?”
“Well, um, you don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to. But it kind of sounded like you didn’t notice how two of your friends felt about each other because you were too caught up in your own troubles... and, well, it’s hard to pay attention to anypony else when you have love on your mind.”
Twilight said nothing at first, but the need to talk to somepony about her problems was getting to her. She looked around nervously, as if somepony was going to pop up out of nowhere and overhear her. “Um... purely hypothetically, suppose you were dating somepony... Well, okay, you are dating somepony, of course, so let’s say you were dating somepony else. Hypothetically, remember. You love them, you love being with them, but you can’t seem to make them completely happy. What would you do?”
Fluttershy smiled warmly. This would really help take her mind off her own troubles with her mother, and she was grateful for it. “Well, first I would ask them what it was, exactly, that was making them unhappy.”
“But I already — erm, let’s say you already tried that. You’ve been trying really hard to work out what is causing this, but you can’t seem to pinpoint the real problem. It’s like you’re... treating the symptoms without really identifying the underlying sickness.”
“Oh my, are they sick?” Fluttershy sat up suddenly, her ears flattened in concern. ”Uhm... I mean, are you — or am I — Twilight, I’m sorry, but this is getting confusing. Is somepony sick?”
“No, Fluttershy, nopony is sick. But somepony is certainly unhappy, and she’s normally so full of life and joy! Seeing her so sad... it’s just killing me — I mean, you.” Twilight took her turn to slump down on the table, her face falling at the mere mention of a depressed Pinkie. “You feel like you’re out of options. You don’t know how to fix things, and you’re afraid that, if they aren’t fixed soon, you might lose her forever.”
Fluttershy nodded her head, thinking things over. “Well, have you tried talking with Pinkie about it?”
“Well, of course I—” Twilight’s pupils dilated and she began to hyperventilate. “Who said anything about Pinkie Pie?!”
“Oh, I’m sorry, it’s just, when you started talking about how happy she normally is, and how you’re worried that she isn’t smiling anymore, it was kind of obvious. Am I not supposed to know? I could just pretend to have no clue who you’re talking about, if it would make you feel better...”
Twilight’s mouth worked silently, her brain sending through at least one thousand dissenting sentences, none of which quite made it all the way to her vocal cords intact. Finally her brain just halted all activity for a few seconds, leaving her to jabber on by herself.
Fluttershy pushed her lightly with a hoof. “Twilight?”
No response.
The perplexed pegasus pondered the poleaxed purple pony. Finally, Fluttershy had an inspired idea: she wet the tip of a hoof and gently inserted it into Twilight’s ear.
The reaction was immediate. Twilight squealed, half in delight and half in annoyance. “Gah! Pinkie, I told you not to put your tongue in there—”
Fluttershy stifled a giggle with a hoof.
Twilight looked around for her pink tormenter-slash-lover, but could somehow only spot a very red-faced Fluttershy. The unicorn’s former elation came crashing down like a poorly worded metaphor. “You’re not Pinkie.”
Fluttershy solemnly shook her head.
Twilight sighed heavily. “I suppose it’s too late to deny that it’s her I’ve been talking about this whole time, isn’t it?”
“Well, you could,” Fluttershy pointed out politely, ”but it wouldn’t be very easy for me to believe you now. I could try believing really, really hard, if you want me to...”
Twilight grumbled in annoyance. “I really am lousy with secrets. I can’t even keep my own...”
Fluttershy gently steered the conversation back onto its original course. “So, you’re afraid Pinkie is unhappy?”
Twilight shook her head violently. “No, I know she’s unhappy. When we first got together she had so much fun, enjoying every moment we played together, but now... now it’s like she’s merely going through the motions for me.”
The pegasus looked mildly confused. “You play games? Have you tried... making love?” Fluttershy’s face flushed crimson again, but she found it was somehow easier to talk about this subject now. “Because it’s wonderful! So very wonderful!”
Twilight blushed heavily, too. “Um, that’s... kind of what we do. But we do it in costume, with illusions to set the scene.”
Fluttershy considered this for a moment, her eyes lighting up. “Oh, that sounds like fun!”
The unicorn smiled brightly for a moment. “It is!” Then her face fell. “Or it was.”
The sea was her domain. All that she surveyed, she held in her sway. Ships to plunder, fish to catch - everything was hers for the taking. She gazed upon her favorite prize: the last survivor of a ship her crew had sunk into the briny deep. She was the captain's mare now, and none of the crew would dare argue that.
"Pinkamena," she called out to the mare, "come join the Captain in her quarters."
The peasant mare looked up from her accustomed place at the ship's aft deck. She nodded silently.
Once inside, the captain began to disrobe. Her mare, however, merely waited for instructions. The captain looked at her with concern. "What troubles ye, lass?"
Her mare said nothing. She was so cold, so stiff...
The mighty pirate-captain strode over to her and kissed her gingerly, hoping for some sign of passion in her face.
The kiss was returned, but it was wooden and uninterested.
"Have I given offense, lass? Is there aught I can do to make it up to ye?"
The mare simply shook her head.
Twilight smacked a hoof down on the table. “I just want to see her happy again. I miss the time when we weren’t worried about being a couple. We just got together; no stress, no strings attached. We were doing just fine!”
Then she let her head fall back onto the familiar wooden surface, because, try as you might, you can only lie to yourself for so long. “We weren’t fine. It was cheap and unsatisfying; every time we parted ways I wanted to beg her to stay. But I don’t know how to break it down in order to fix it! She tried dating me, she tried spending time with me... but now, whenever we... m-make love... I can’t see her there with me anymore. It’s like... like I’m alone.”
Fluttershy sniffled loudly. She realized Twilight expected some kind of reply from her now, but she could offer nothing. “I’m sorry, Twilight... I wish I could do or say something to make it better for you. It sounds like you two really do love each other, but you don’t seem to really know how to show it...”
Twilight waved a hoof dismissively. “I know, I know, but it felt good to get it out of my system, at least. I’ve been so afraid to ask Pinkie about it. Her idea of fixing things is breaking up then immediately asking me out again.”
Her friend looked at her curiously, unsure if she was serious. “So... how do you fix things, normally speaking?”
“I just told you,” Twilight said brusquely, ”I don’t know how to fix things with Pinkie.”
“No, I mean... if it were something else. Oh! I’m sorry, I’m afraid I’m not very good at this... Um, I was just hoping that if I got you to think, then maybe you could find the answer on your own? You always seem to have one for us, whenever we need it the most...”
Twilight groaned. “You don’t think I’ve tried? The book that mentioned the whole ‘friendship with benefits’ thing doesn’t say anything about what you should do if you want to go and turn that into a real relationship! And every other book on romantic advice I’ve read assumes I’m on the other end of the spectrum! Pinkie and I basically started at the finish line... at home base. The problem is that I don’t know how to back up from there and find where we went wrong.”
Fluttershy put a hoof on Twilight’s shoulder. “You need to stop overthinking things, Twilight. If that’s all right. Just let go. You’ll find a way to do what’s right. I have faith in you.”
Twilight’s lip quivered. “L-let go?”
Fluttershy would have elaborated on that statement further, but the door opened at that very moment, and before she knew it the pegasus was covered by a pale blue magical aura and dragged off with barely enough time to squeak out, “Um... I guess I’m going somewhere else now?”
“What?!” Twilight ran out the door after Fluttershy, but froze shortly after setting hoof out the door. Wait. Is that... Rarity? If it was, she had obviously seen better days: the usually pristine pony appeared to be covered in a very sticky substance, her muzzle was smeared with something that Twilight hoped was melted chocolate, there was a towel literally stuck to her coat, and a futile comb was inextricably embedded in the enormous mess that had once been her finely-coiffed mane.
Rarity continued to telekinetically carry Fluttershy away from the library, making sounds that were half cries of sorrow and half shrieks of utter madness.
Fluttershy shrugged helplessly. “I don’t know what’s going on, but it looks like Rarity needs me right now. Really, really badly. So, um... bye, Twilight! Good luck!”
Twilight nodded sadly. “Goodbye...”
Fluttershy looked back in concern at her half-mad fillyfriend. “Rarity, are you okay?”
Rarity, however, was anything but. She trotted quickly away from the library, heading towards some unknown destination. After several moments of being carried around, Fluttershy finally concluded that her fillyfriend was simply too distraught to produce coherent speech. “It’s going to be all right, Rarity! I’m here for you...”
After an abrupt halt the aura pulled her into a crushing embrace. The smell of cupcake batter assaulted her nose while nonsensical, sobbing wails filled her ears. “Um... there there?”
Before she had a chance to pat Rarity’s back or otherwise comfort her, Fluttershy was lifted up by the aura and whisked off once more. She decided to just let the magic carry her along, hoping that, at some point, Rarity would perhaps calm down enough to explain what had happened. Soon enough, the ponynapped pegasus could spot the spa in the distance. Of course, she runs there whenever she gets so much as a pimple. And this... this is a fashion emergency...
Rarity’s magic roughly shoved the front door open, and Fluttershy nearly got a nasty crack on the head as she was yanked through the entrance, forcing her to quickly tuck her head down into her chest just to pass through a hair's width under the doorway.
Rarity approached the counter and babbled incoherently. Lotus only stared at the soiled fashionista, trying to make out some semblance of language. She shrugged helplessly. Then Fluttershy found herself being levitated over to the counter, instead. She smiled sheepishly. “Um... hi, Lotus. I think Rarity is having a teensy-weensy little mental breakdown right now. Do you have an opening for... um, nowish? She looks like she really needs a full treatment session to help her recover from... whatever happened.”
Lotus nodded quickly. “Aloe! Prepare the mineral bath! Miss Rarity is having a crisis!”
Aloe poked her head into the room. “Another one?!”
“This one is serious! Break out the heavy-duty shampoo, the one we use on the heifers.”
Rarity blubbered gratefully. Fluttershy gravitated back to her, and was immediately pulled into another hug.
Fluttershy ran her hooves through Rarity’s matted mane soothingly. “Shhh. It’s going to be okay now.”
Twilight watched in bemusement as Fluttershy was lovingly abducted by Rarity’s magical aura. As unusual as that sight was, it still wasn’t enough to distract her for long. Those two would work out whatever was amiss themselves. Twilight’s own conundrum remained the same: what to do about Pinkie Pie.
If only I could approach this mess logically! Every time I try to think about her, my brain just seems to seize up and melt into pudding. She walked back into the library and closed the door behind her. Still need to replace that lock...
Books have failed me; there seems to be no existing solution— She looked around suddenly. Solution...? Twilight considered how she normally arrived at solutions for mathematical or logical problems. Chalkboard! Need chalk, loads of chalk... Okay!
Twilight began sketching crude drawings of herself and Pinkie. Under Pinkie’s sketch she wrote: ‘Current status: unhappy.’
So, we have to change that. To do so, we must determine the underlying cause.
She pondered for a moment. Pinkius Piecus’ normal modus operandi is best described as ‘exceedingly happy’. Known causes for a change in that demeanor, based on field observations, are thus far: A. being abandoned by friends, and B. Discord.
She patiently ticked those options off, eliminating them. But now there is new data, which introduces a whole new variable. She drew an x- and y-axis between the two blob-like chalk ponies on the board, and charted out the known data points between them. Yes. Her unhappiness appears to be directly proportional to her proximity to... me. Ergo...
“Just let go. You’ll find a way to do what’s right.” Fluttershy’s words replayed in Twilight’s mind, but she ignored them.
There has to be something else. We can still be happy together, can’t we?
“...let go...”
“No! I don’t want to! I can... well, I don’t know what I can do, but I’ll find some way...”
“...find a way to do what’s right...”
“But... it’s not right! She’ll be miserable without...”
Twilight froze; her eyes darted around the room, before her gaze landed back on the chalkboard.
Current status: unhappy.
“She’s miserable with me.”
She slumped down onto her rump. “I-I’m the problem? I can’t fix us... because I’m the one that is making her sad.”
She stared at the chalkboard for a long time, trying to think of something, anything that wasn’t...
“Letting her go...”
The words tasted like ashes in her mouth. Her heart railed against the idea, but her mind coldly refused to pay it any heed.
She began to weep gently.
It’s not fair! I just want to love her, and be loved back. Why is this so hard?!
She glared around the room at the countless shelves of books. “Useless, every single one of you! Romance, psychology, philosophy - none of you have the answer!
"W-why don’t you,” she sobbed heavily, “have the answer?”
The books offered no response. Her heart continued to plead with her to find some other solution, but her mind kept insisting that she had to accept the truth. She was only making it worse by letting it drag on needlessly. Pinkie had been right. They had started out all wrong, but after a false start like that there seemed to be no simple way to just begin anew. The error was buried too deep in the equation. There was only one choice now...
Twilight picked up the eraser and, slowly and methodically, removed all trace of her own image from the chalkboard.
Aloe put a little more pressure into the motion of the scrubbing brush. “Fluttershy, I assure you, there is no trace of dough left on her body.”
Rarity, however, continued to lie completely catatonic inside the cocoon of suds that covered her from water level all the way to the very tip of her horn.
Fluttershy hummed happily as she applied shampoo to Rarity’s mane for the fourth time. “Um... I’m pretty sure its all gone now, Rarity. You should be fine... Please say something?”
There was no response from the fashionista.
Fluttershy looked helplessly at Aloe. “Are you sure you got everything?”
Aloe patiently listed the places she had cleaned, once again. “Yes, Miss Fluttershy. I cleared the ears, nose, horn, coat, mane and tail. Every spot on her body has been thoroughly cleansed and recleansed multiple times now. A particle of dirt wouldn’t dare to so much as look at her at this point in time.”
Think Fluttershy, think! She had a nasty shock... How do I bring her out of this? “Okay, I need you to finish rinsing her. Then I’m going to try something.”
They carefully rinsed Rarity down and dried her off, then laid her down on a soft towel. “Okay, Aloe, you might want to look away.”
With that, she took Rarity’s face into her hooves and kissed her fillyfriend thoroughly.
At first Aloe did as instructed, but eventually she became curious about what could possibly be going— Oh. Oh my... She stared, slack-jawed, as she found herself witnessing a very impressive display of lung capacity at work. H-how did she learn to do that with her tongue? Unable to tear her gaze away, she watched, wishing she had a notepad on hoof. Also, was it getting hot in the room, or was that just her?
Eventually, Rarity’s eyes began showing signs of life, and she enthusiastically returned the lengthy, passionate kiss. When they finally broke away from each other she smiled languidly. “Fluttershy, darling, I had the most horrid dream! I was... filthy.” She shuddered at the mere thought. ”Every part of me was covered in something horrible. It felt like I would never be clean again!”
Fluttershy breathed a sigh of relief and smiled. “Well, you’re fine, so you can stop thinking about it now.”
Rarity looked around the room. “Why are we at the spa? Last I remember, I was baking things together with Pinkie—”
Thinking on her hooves, Fluttershy interrupted Rarity before she could suffer a relapse. “Yes! And you were very, very tired afterwards, so I took you to the spa to unwind. Isn’t that right, Aloe?”
Aloe was blushing furiously. “Yes, Miss Fluttershy. Miss Rarity was... tired.”
Rarity looked curiously at the embarrassed earth pony. “Aloe? Are you all right, darling? You seem a bit red in the face; is the steam getting to you?”
Aloe turned her face away, trying to hide her expression. “I’m... I’m fine!”
Rarity’s expression turned pensive. “Are you sure? I believe I, for one, am fully recovered now. Pinkie can be a bit draining, but I have never had her tire me to the point of passing out before... I feel most embarrassed to have apparently collapsed from the exhaustion, but now that I see how the humidity and heat are affecting you, my dear, I wonder if the ovens might perhaps have played a part in my little episode. I would hate to see the same happen to you!”
Aloe looked askance at Fluttershy, who nodded imperceptibly. “Perhaps, yes, I do feel a bit... heated. I should be okay as soon as we leave this room. Come, let us continue to the mud baths; it will be nice and cool in there.”
Fluttershy shook her head. “Aloe, I think that maybe we should skip—”
Rarity smiled. “That does sound wonderful right now.”
Her fillyfriend looked at her incredulously. “But—”
Rarity stood up. “Come, darling! A little mud never hurt anypony.”
They both lay back in the mud, letting the coolness of it ease every little ache on their bodies. Nothing was said for some time as they simply soaked in pampered bliss.
Finally, Rarity broached a question that had been weighing on her mind. “How did the letter-writing go, darling?”
Fluttershy flinched. “Um... fine. I-I didn’t know what exactly to write, so I only asked if she could make time to see me around lunch.”
Rarity lifted one of the cucumber slices from her eyes and smiled encouragingly. “Don’t worry, my love. I understand it must be very difficult to discuss some things in writing. It’s best if we just explain things to them face-to-face. I’d rather meet your parents before any false impressions or preconceptions have a chance to form; mere text can only convey so much, after all.”
Her fillyfriend did not respond immediately. “How were things with Pinkie Pie?”
The fashionista frowned. “Not as well as they could be. She’s having some relationship issues with—” She stopped just before blurting the name, remembering her promise. “—somepony...”
Fluttershy tittered into her hoof. “It’s okay, Rarity. Twilight told me.”
“Oh, thank Celestia! Yes, they seem like such a cute couple, but they are having trouble figuring out what, exactly, their relationship is. Pinkie feels too distanced from Twilight when they make love due to all that roleplay they apparently do. It makes her feel like she’s not really there with Twilight at all.”
Fluttershy looked up in confusion. “But... that’s exactly what Twilight said! She felt like Pinkie was just going along with everything to make her happy. She said the last time they played together it was like Pinkie wasn’t even there!”
The fashionista smiled grimly. “Really now. Well, that just won’t do! However, I did tell Pinkie to go and talk things over with Twilight. I’m sure they will work it all out together.”
Fluttershy seemed significantly less certain. “Twilight seemed really upset... I was trying to tell her to calm down and think things through, since that’s what she does best, but then I had to, um, go...”
Rarity raised an eyebrow. “Oh? Pressing engagements elsewhere?”
The pegasus shook her head. “No. Well, yes, actually. You needed me.”
“Yes, about that, how did you know to meet me here? Did Pinkie Pie—”
“Twilight hates me!” cried a pitiful voice from inside a nearby bucket.
Pausing, they both turned slowly to stare at the offending object, only to recoil in unison as Pinkie sprang forth from it without warning and dived muzzle-first into the mud bath, spraying a deluge of mud all over the place. She wrapped her forelimbs around Rarity in a crushing embrace and promptly began crying her eyes out.
How did she.... never mind, she’s Pinkie Pie. “Pinkie! What happened?”
Pinkie wailed into Rarity’s mane. “I don’t know! She came up to my room saying she had to do what was right and that she needed to just let go and then she broke up with me but she didn’t come back right away to ask me out again!”
Rarity murmured soothing inanities to her friend. Oh, my poor Pinkie Pie. We’ll fix this, you’ll see. “There there, Pinkie. We’ll get her back.”
Pinkie sniffled. “Y-you promise?”
“Cross my heart, darling. I don’t know how just yet, but we shall find a way.”
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Yay update.
Commence Read!
Now saddened by how Pinkie is feeling. Twilight needs a stern talking to.
And now wondering about Aloe, such a voyeur.
t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSK6B-MTHXiM7OUq7fTnFHwvXjMCFfQv5c3adZfdTZElnsMT6rOk_D-ymneaw
Also silly Twi misunderstanding everything
Woah, that was faster than last time.
1657968 I have my groove back now yes.
Twilight, why aren't you looking harder? Maybe she isn't unhappy with you, maybe she's unhappy with the roleplaying and a perceived lack of true intimacy? Guh, Twi is trying so hard to accommodate Pinkie, when Pinkie now wants less frills and more intimacy, but neither is properly stating their position. Yay assumptions and miscommunications.
Damn it Twilight!
Sergeant Posey
The plot thickens.
1658004
She's only trying to do what's best for Pinkie...
Twilight... You... IDIOT!
Even if I didn't know Pinkie's perspective, I am quite certain I would realise that the roleplay was the problem...
1657983
'How Steel Resolve got his groove back'...
Twilight's conclusion is very... Twilight-ish. Poor Twilight and Pinkie. Miscommunication and misunderstanding are really hitting them hard.
twilight... you complete and utter dumb....
rarity freak out is best freak out
Hard to believe how long this story has become. This chapter was a step in the right direction and it's good to see the story truly opening up to let the secondary couples get almost equal limelight to the central arc.
The entire part with Rarity reduced to gibbering madness was priceless, especially Fluttershy's calm reaction to the whole thing. I wouldn't have minded any entire chapter just of that.
And you know, it seems like despite all the roleplaying, Twilight hasn't really gained any...experience.
pinkie.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/thumb/mlfw3168.png
Twilight, dear...one of your variables has a variable missing from its calculation
math fail
Glad to see this updated. None of my favorites were updating so I was getting a bit nervous that none of them would continue. Sorry if that sounds a bit selfish.
1658488 That's okay, I have a lot of stories I love to see update too.
1657983
Let's hope it stays in place.
Sooooo Pinkie is unhappy that they aren't making love as themselves
but she's the one who suggests roleplaying in the first place
so why doesn't she just
oh I don't know
Stop?
I guess you could say
*puts on shades*
this is the end of Twinkie
Too soon?
Yes! My current fave is update!! Drinks all around! Who wants rum? I've got red wine in my rum and vodka in my blood...
The things I write when I'm sober...
I'm a complete psycho sometimes. 
Silly Twilight...
fc09.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2011/184/3/1/facehoof_by_x_sprockette_x-d3kwiqf.png
And please! Let's have "parents scene" already! I cant wait! PLEESEEE!
1657963 SO much better than a stupid "First" post. Thank you. (And no, I am not being sarcastic.)
1658844 It wouldn't work if he was anyone else. How he says is what makes it so great.
When are we gonna meet Fluttershy's parents?
i daaaawed throughout this whole chapter.
TWILIGHT NOOO!!!!
can't wait for the next one ! lol and feature box again ? gratz
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Yep twilight over thought again
she just needs to stop thinking for a little bit it seems to get her in trouble. 
Looking forward to the next update 
The visions of a levitated Fluttershy sheepishly speaking to the spa ponies! The visons! dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/lolface_Celestia.png
1658000 I once had a miscommunication with a girl who I was trying to get a date with.
... She ended up breaking up with me before our first date for this other chick.
Can't say I wasn't peeved, but I just sighed, and said: "You'll get me pics, right?" She laughed, and said she'd get me one.
Her girlfriend was pretty damn fine.
Rarity approached the counter and babbled incoherently. Lotus only stared at the soiled fashionista, trying to make out some semblance of language. She shrugged helplessly. Then Fluttershy found herself being levitated over to the counter, instead. She smiled sheepishly. “Um... hi Lotus. I think Rarity is having a teensy-weensy little mental breakdown right now. Do you have an opening for... um, nowish? She looks like she really needs a full treatment session to help her recover from... whatever happened.”
That...for some reason that's hilarious, mostly because I imagine her bathed in a magical aura, but hanging, like...well, exactly like this
http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m8yoae9vgG1rqg01ho1_500.png
And...I'm not sure where I'm going with this post except 'well played' Steel Resolve
1658008
Get Shining Armor to come along and order sergeant to not blow up.
1658413
*smacks with bricks*
1657983 why...
why is twilight so dense
Well, Written, Sir. Have a squee.
Ohmigod, this is getting SOOO complicated for the Six.
in.
Please update soon. And throw more
Oh Twi, you really need to learn to think outside the chimney. Flutters didn't mean it that way.
perplexed pegasus pondered the poleaxed purple pony, bravo dear on the alliteration. I do love a nicely turned phrase. Also
Pinkie. Time for Rarity and Fluttershy to the rescue, hopefully before the fiasco with Fluttershy's mother.
Can't wait for the next update darling, ciao
I AM DONE.
I READ EVERYTHING UP UNTIL NOW
AND IT'S ONLY BEEN 6 OR 7 HOURS!
1660358
Hey welcome to the party! There's still plenty of cookies and punch!
Ooooooooooh boy... of course you HAD to do that.
I figured Twilight would take that from Fluttershy's words, but I certainly didn't expect her to not even give Pinkie a chance to say something. 
I honestly hope they come to the rescue... before things get more out of hoof. And that soon, this story maybe picks up a bit, since 20-some chapters in (if don't count interludes and/or Prologue) and only DAYS have passed. Not that it's wrong, but have been focusing several chapters over one day at times and not sure if plan on skipping ahead in time soon, if covering any weddings in Mane 6 among themselves ships you've done in this story, like you seemed to imply from Rarity and Fluttershy hinting at with other ponies or moments in the story. If this story is going to be a long one even, not that I claim to know where it's all going or have even read the whole story... read most of it, at some point, aside from a few of the beginning chapters, even though was out of order and such (not sure why 
). Well, here's hoping that TwiPie gets saved! Likely will, but never can know. dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/shrug_Twilight_Sparkle.png
Other points I liked: when Aloe watched Rarity and Fluttershy kissing (Is it wrong that I almost expected something perverted to come out of that moment?
Probably cause of my own fic based off someone else's (with permission) that may have something like this, if I feel it'd be worth it or make sense, even. Though won't focus on RariShy or even has it as a couple, basing off original). Maybe the brief roleplaying scene like one of the ones when Pinkie mentioned it last chapter. And I think when Fluttershy gave Twilight a pony version of wet willie. dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Fluttershy_lolface.png
Nitpick: Don't really know Posey, other than she's a G1(?) pony and lot of people (at least in stories have read here, in some minor reference or longer one) write her as Fluttershy's mom, for some reason. Not that that's bad thing, but I'm not entirely too familiar with any MLP except the current one. Assuming that's the same one here, not that I recall what she exactly looks like until you write chapter with them meeting Shy's parents.
1658643
Well, if you recall from the previous chapter, Pinkie acknowledged that Twilight tried to IGNORE the problem entirely, even if she sees it's been going on for some time presumably. Though not sure how long their relationship has been going on, if the Interlude where they were together and then broke up and got back together for real was taking place before the story began or just beginning. So anyway, she just continued to do the roleplaying without acknowledging it as the issue, cause their relationship sorta grew dependent on it, I guess.
1659024
I'm not the author, but if had to guess: Probably in the next arc, at this rate. Assuming this day ends in following chapter or two revolving around main couple.
1659779
She was ABOUT to explain, but Twilight just seemed to think that after she left, based off two words of their whole convo, she thought Pinkie didn't like HER anymore and not the fact that they were roleplaying all the time when making love to each other.
Well, she's not really used to being romantically involved with other ponies, only has in this story in her library books talking about casual sex and stuff that they've already done, supposedly. And Fluttershy kinda got interrupted by her distressed marefriend Rarity, after things got worse apparently at Sugarcube Corner after she got COVERED in batter.
1660646
Physical descriptions will be given when we meet them.
1660814
Just was saying I guess, cause was how I felt. Since I don't think described them or their names (maybe Shy's dad) in the flashback last chapter, not that thought about that or am impatient. 
Do hope things pick up for the couple (not just in moving events forward little faster, as noted in my review), since they've just gotten together and already had quite a few struggles. 
Yes, I'm aware and expected as much.
So much YESS, but so much Twinkie disappointment. When is there gonna be completeness for Twinkie! I want a twilights parents meet pinkie pie scene! I can tell it is gonna happen in two to three chapters.
1660646 Mhm, mhm, now I have a question for you. Say I was really, really stupid and couldn't, or didn't, read the wall of text. Care to shorten it?
1661400
Assuming you're joking around (cause only MY review was wall of text, not reply to you), but if not: When the author feels like it, probably in next arc of three or so chapters after this current one.
1658276
*Buy some apples!*
1659938
That's no squee! THIS is a squee!
1661429 Oh... Sorry, I do that a lot.
1661435
I AM NOT A HAPPY PONY. My squees are filled with rage youaregoingtolovemeness Therefore :
1658000
I'd expect it. The two of them are even more opposed than a Twijack pairing. Twi goes with structured thought patterns, Pinkie just does whatever feels right. They should have greater communication problems than any other possible pair in the group.