The Derpy Report

by Owlor

Fluttershy

THE DERPY REPORT

Part 4. Fluttershy

“Fluttershy, are you there?” Derpy shouted trough the door, dismayed when her knocks yielded no reply.

She tried knocking one last time, but it was becoming obvious that the shy pony simply wasn't there. She sat down and decided to wait around, just in case Fluttershy was only out temporarily. There was a rustle from the bushes, a common sound around the gentle Pegasus' house. There were always some animals nearby waiting for her or just hanging around.

Two young ponies walked by the house. They were part of the trendy set, the loose clique of young mares responsible for most of the gossip in Ponyville. Derpy had seen them around before and recognized them as Cherry Berry and Rainbowshine. She could hear them talking. One of them noticed Derpy and pointed her out for the other pony.

“Hey look, Fluttershy got a visitor,” Cherry Berry said. “I didn't know she actually had friends.”

“She does, haven't you seen the ponies she hangs out with?” Rainbowshine replied. “They're all pretty strange.”

“No, I haven't, but I'm not surprised,” Cherry Berry said. “She's pretty strange too. I mean, once, when I was just minding my own business, she started to harass me for no reason. Okay, maybe I was in the way or something, but still...”

“Fluttershy?” Rainbowshine interrupted and gave her friend a disbelieving look. “But she's always so shy!”

“I know right? Maybe she had been sampling one of Zecora's herbs or something,” Cherry Berry said with a shrug. “Or maybe it’s just that if you hang out with animals you become more like one...”

The two ponies continued along the road and Derpy was once again left alone.

---

Derpy looked trough the window of the house, thinking about the last words the pony had said. If that was true, it was hardly reflected in the decor, at least. Fluttershy's home was far from animalistic; it was simply, yet pleasantly furnished in a variety of earth tones.

Across the walls and ceiling, she had a rather smart system of nests and walkways for birds and small mammals. It was surprisingly clean, considering how many animals she took care of. If anything, it seemed she made animals more civilized rather than the other way around.

She stopped just shy of snooping and once again sat down in front of the door. She tried to settle on how long she was willing to wait. She didn’t want to miss Fluttershy, but at the same time, she was growing impatient.

After twenty minutes, another pony passed by the house. Derpy jolted up, but saw that this clearly wasn’t the pegasus she was hoping for. This pony had short cyan hair and a carefree demeanor. Derpy went up to her, glad to have somepony to talk to.

“Hello!”

“Hi?” the other pony said in an unsure voice. Derpy held the spoon up and she stared at it in confusion.

“Are you eating ice cream?” she asked and pointed at the spoon.

“Not yet,” Derpy replied. “I'm Derpy by the way, who are you?”

“I'm Lyra, uhm... nice to meet you.”

“I was just wondering about Fluttershy, what do you know about her?”

“Fluttershy?” Lyra pondered over the name for a bit. “She's the veterinarian, right? Good with animals, always taking in strays. To be honest, I think she cares more about animals than she does ponies.”

“Why do you think that is?” Derpy asked, genuinely puzzled. Lyra tried to gather her thoughts and form a reply.

“Well...” she said. “Animals don't judge you the way ponies do, they just want you to take care of them.” She paused for a moment, still struggling to explain herself. Derpy could hear the bushes rustling slightly in the background and a few birds chimed in with their high-pitched tweets. Finally, Lyra figured out how to phrase her ideas and she jumped out of her contemplative pose.

“It's like when I play my music, she realized. “Ponies stop judging me by how I look or what I say. The only thing that matters is if I can play a good melody.” Just picturing it made her eager to play and she couldn’t stop herself from humming a few bars quietly.

“Sounds nice!” Derpy said clearly impressed, prompting Lyra to blush a light shade of crimson.

“Was there anything else?” Lyra asked her politely.

“No, thank you! take care.”

---

Derpy was growing impatient waiting for Fluttershy. There just didn’t seem to be any point in waiting around. As she turned around to leave, she heard the rustling for the third time, and this time, the apparent perpetrator appeared. A small bunny hopped out of the bush and stared at her with quizzical eyes.

“Oh, hi Angel!” Derpy said. “Do you know where Fluttershy is?” Angel nodded.

“Can I talk to her?” Angel shook his head and made a strange gesture, as if he was playing charades. Derpy tried to play along.

“She's... tall?” Derpy guessed. Angel shook his head and tried again.

“Long... she has a long neck?” Another shake and repeated the gesture, this time with a little more clarity.

“Away, far away... she's far away? The rabbit nodded and continued.

“...in a city, Phillydelphia?” Angel nodded enthusiastically, then made a confounding gesture.

“Handing out flowers?” Derpy thought. Angel pressed a paw against his forehead in frustration. Suddenly, something hit her and she perked up.

“No, shopping!” she said. “Fluttershy is shopping in Phillydelphia?” The bunny nodded, glad to finally be back on track.

“Oh, will she be back today?” Derpy asked. Another nod.

“When, soon?” she asked hopefully. Angel shook his head and Derpy looked disappointed.

“Later this evening, huh?” A nod.

“Oh, I see. I'll come back later then.”

---

Derpy went to the town square, trying to find something to occupy her time. She was hoping to find one of the two other ponies she had yet to interview, Rainbow Dash, specifically. Rarity was probably busy in her boutique, but Rainbow Dash usually had some time to spare for her fans.

She made her way past the stands, eagerly looking at the items for sale. Not that she planned on buying anything, but she enjoyed window-shopping. Most salesponies offered vegetables, but a few of the smaller tents offered items that were a little less practical and a little more interesting.

An old wandering mare showed her a silver bracelet with charms. Most charms were unremarkable, little silver flowers or candy with no special properties. But in a small box off to the side she stored a few charms that each had a memory of a place stored in them.

She had a feather that represented Cloudsdale, a leaf that represented the Everfree forest and a crown lined with gold that represented Canterlot, among others. When the charms were shaken, some of the scents and sounds of the place in question would leak out.

“I made these to cure homesickness in ponies,” the elderly mare explained to Derpy. “But it didn't work as intended, it just make wayward ponies sad. They still buy them though, go figure...”

---

Derpy couldn’t find Rainbow Dash or Rarity, but she did see Big Macintosh struggling with a large cart filled with apples. Glad to see a familiar face, Derpy skipped towards him and held the spoon up like a microphone. Big Macintosh stared at the spoon confusedly, then made a questioning hum.

“Hi, Big Mac!” Derpy said. “Can I talk with you?”

“Eeyup,” Big Macintosh replied.

“You know Fluttershy, right?”

“Eeyup.”

“Do you think she cares more about animals than ponies?” Derpy asked earnestly and Big Mac thought about this for a bit.

“Nope.”

“Why?” Derpy asked. Answering this question apparently required more eloquence than Big Mac was comfortable with, so he just shrugged.

“Anything else you wanted to ask?” he said.

“Yes, I'm looking for Rainbow Dash. If you see her, can you tell her I want to talk to her?”

“Eeyup.”

This conversation gave Derpy an idea, if she couldn't talk to Fluttershy, she could at least talk to the ponies that knew her. ‘Apart from Twilight and the rest of her friends, who does Fluttershy know?’ Derpy asked herself. ‘Who should I talk to?’ Her thought process was rudely interrupted by the growling of her own stomach and she suddenly realized how hungry she was.

---

The bell over the door of Sugarcube Corner made a cheerful sound as Derpy went inside. he place was unusually un-busy today, with most of the customers outside enjoying the day and the Cakes having no big orders to complere in the nick of time or a giant but fragile cake to transport somewhere for some important party. If it was at all possible for a working family such as theirs, they were almost a bit bored. Mrs. Cake, who was cleaning an already clean counter for the umpteenth time, perked up immediately at the sight of a potential customer.

“Hello Derpy! What can I do for you today?”

“I needed to think for a bit, but I was too hungry. Do you have any muffins?”

“You're lucky today,” Mrs. Cake said with a smile. “We had a rather picky client earlier. She canceled her order because we couldn't get the frosting even on the first batch. If you don't mind strawberry muffins, you can get them for half the price!”

Derpy eagerly agreed and mrs. Cake gave her the leftover muffins in a box that matched their yummy light pink color.

“Wait, If you don't mind me asking,” Mrs Cake said as Derpy were about to leave the store. “You said you were thinking about something. Is something troubling you?”

“No, I'm fine, I wanted to talk to Fluttershy, but nopony has seen her today. Do you know anypony who knows her?”

Mrs. Cake paused and poked her chin with a forehoof, deep in thought. “You mean apart from Twilight and the other girls?” she asked.

“Yes.”

“Try Mr Greenhooves. He tends to her garden sometimes. Anything else, dear?”

Derpy picked the spoon up once again and put it under the chin of Mrs. Cake as tough it was a microphone. The baker chose to ignore it and said nothing apart from a quick quizzical “uhm?”

“How would you describe Fluttershy?” she asked, trying to sound as much as a reporter as she could muster.

“Well, she doesn't like to bring too much attention to herself, and if you do pay attention to her, she really wants you to like her,” Mrs. Cake replied. “To be fair, it's hard not to.” she added with a laugh.

“Interesting!” Derpy said, shining like a lit candle. Then she noticed the time and jerked up into the air in a gravity-defying way. “Gotta go, thanks and g’bye!”

Derpy was out of the store with a crash, but still hearing the soft but still cheerful jingle of the bell. Mrs. Cake let the smile on her muzzle linger as the pegasus left her shop. It completely drooped though when her gaze fell onto the clean counter and the empty establishment.

---

Outside, Derpy noticed something zip by her and round the corner. One of her eyes instinctively trailed the blur while the other remained focused on the road. When she followed to see who it was, she found herself face to face with Angel, who looked thoroughly guilty.

“Oh, hello Angel, what are you doing here?” Derpy asked. The bunny didn’t say anything, but his eyes spoke volumes.

‘I was just making sure you didn't spread any of those rumors you heard about my Fluttershy’, they seemed to say.

“Maybe you're kinda lonely because Fluttershy is gone?” Derpy guessed, unable to read Angels mind.

‘No, I was FOLLOWING you, you dumb blonde! To protect Fluttershy's honor from your nosy questions.’

“You can be with me if you want to,” Derpy offered. “Here, hop on up!” She lowered her head.

‘I am the worst spy ever! And Derpy is the worst target of espionage ever!’ Angel lamented to himself, but hopped on anyway.

---

Derpy found Mr Greenhooves tending to his own garden, as he hummed to himself while watering his plants. The furrows had gone from simply being moist to the point where they started to overflow with water. Derpy went up to him and held the box up in front of his face.

“I have muffins,” she announced to him. “You want one?”

Mr Greenhooves turned his head around, surprised but delighted by her offering.

“Don't mind if I do!” he said and grabbed the one with the most frosting. He devoured it with a content expression.

“Thanks for the snack, I needed that. Now, can I assist you with anything?”

“Yes, you know Fluttershy, right?” Derpy asked. Angel looked disapprovingly at Greenhooves from the top of Derpy’s head, but he didn’t seem to notice.

“Yes, I water her petunias. Not as often nowadays though, she's really picky about her flowers, y'know?”

“No, I don't. I thought Fluttershy was shy.” Derpy said, noticeably confused. Greenhooves laughed.

“You'd think so ,wouldn't you?” he said, looking amused. “But she's not shy about letting you know when you've screwed up, lemme tell you! Do you have any more questions?”

“No, it’s fine, thanks!” Derpy said and started flying back towards town.

---

Derpy really thought that talking to Greenhooves would help her, but all it did was make her more confused. Everypony seemed to have a different idea about Fluttershy's personality, and the notions simply didn't match up. She looked for somepony that could help her sort this out.

As she made her way around town, she passed by Ponyville's library. Spike was standing outside the door when Derpy walked by and he greeted her.

“Oh, hello again, Derpy,” Spike said. “Did you forget something?”

“No I just had a question.”

“Sure! What is it?”

“Can a pony be two things at once? I mean, like, both shy and assertive?” Derpy asked. Spike thought hard about this for a while, nearly biting his tounge.

“I don't know,” he finaly said. “I mean, Rainbow Dash's a fast athlete, but also lazy. Applejack's honest about what she thinks, but hides her feelings. And Twilight...” He looked around and certified that Twilight was still on the next room and dropped his voice to a nigh inaudible tone.

“She's supposed to be all about knowledge and stuff, but she judges things so quickly,” he said, then tried to gather his thoughts for the conclusion of his musings. “It’s like, you can't be just one thing all the time, you're going to have some flaws, things that go against your better nature. Uhm... did that answer your question?”

“I think so, but what about Rarity?”

“Rarity...” Spike trailed off into his daydreams with Rarity and various sugary homes. Derpy passed a hoof in front of his eyes to see if he would react, but Spike was wistfully gazing into the horizon, prompting the pegasus to shrug and trot away.

Spike was rudely awoken from his romantic daydreams by a rustle from a nearby bush. Frowning, he went up to it in order to check what it was that was making so much noise. As he approached the bush, he noticed that somepony was staring back at him.

“What are YOU doing here?” he asked.

Comments

[TrollestiaSubject]

this is the other way around
media.moddb.com/cache/images/groups/1/6/5666/thumb_620x2000/Teacher_Derpy.jpg
jeje, no really, nice story

[Maera Fey]

I wish I was a better active user of English language. If I was, maybe then I would be able to find the words which would express how greatly I love the part about being two things at once. It's just perfect!