Protocorn
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"dont sue me i have nothing to give you" from now on i will be useing that as my Disclaimer
Disclaimer
dont sue me i have nothing to give you
403807
I'm totally stealing that as well.
omg that was flippen hilarous i was warry to read this, BUT I REGRET NOTHING and go trollestia
Good to know that my work's appreciated.
Think i'll be adding a chapter today but expect these in three day intervals, I write it when it comes to me.
Hawt.
loved it so far but i skipped the real bad part hope you dont mind
409278
Thanx.
409874
Which was the real bad part? O.O You mean that part near the beginning?
411388 naughty part lol
(for those who still dont understand the clopper part)
412606
It's cool, that part wasn't essential to the story. Think I should put a warning around it?
Poor Twilight.
I think.
Not exactly sure what she was thinking.
Total story views: 69
Heh Heh. Also 4 good, 3 bad. 7 is good luck I hear. Now then for those who rate down: Please tell me why. Maybe you don't like the plot, maybe the main character seems like a gary stu, maybe it seems anti human (which it's not), maybe you just plain don't like it. I don't have telepathy so I don't know, what I do know is I can't improve if you don't tell me what I'm doing wrong. So please, I humbly request thine words of wisdom and hate oh dark ones.
Next up: I'm considering taking in other people's OCs and even SIs(Self Inserts). Just put them in the comments section on my page, tell me what you want for them, and I'll see what I can do. Also for the love of my ancestors please give me detail. I cannot really work without them, for example: grey shirt, caucasion, blue eyes, blonde hair, blue jeans, female. Cannot comply, scarring? Anything off about them, bad attitude or saint? I need detail to truely capture them. And maybe a bit of history, so I can empathize properly.
433533
... That was delayed on the organic end. Big time. Still not deleting it. Will be late with the update due to reality, studying hard for one to two days.
Unforseen delays have pushed back the chapter, gonna be a day or so later than I had planned. Sorry, if it's any consolation Pinkie threatened me with molestation if I didn't hurry up with the update.
Chapter is out and once I get Pinkie to agree that the timing is acceptable so that she'll put away the chains things should be back to normal. Please don't let her get me, have you seen what she's capable of?
I love this fic but i have several questions.
What exactly is Havoc's mental state, both affected and unaffected by the control, and why in the kings right mind would he want to take off the control?
Did Celestia offer to be his servant by offering to become a part of his harem?
Is havoc going to stage a coup and take over equestria and ruin it as badly as his homeworld?
How Insane is Celestia with her carnal desires?
Why is the king a midget?
Why force 400 mates on Havoc? His stamina does seem to be incredible, but by the time he finishes fertilizing all of them the first ones will have had foals and he'll have to start all over again. This fate seems awesome and yet exhausting and almost worse than death when you consider that the king will probably just keeping producing more offspring to be mated. It seems to be a sad role in existence you have forced him into.
Is Havoc insulting Celestia's cooking when he said it tastes better than anything he has eaten on his home world? it doesn't seem to mean all that much.
Finally are the ceilings that the corpses stick on smooth?
Don't need all the answers but some would be nice.
>>supbrony101
Aaaight, I'll try to answer all your questions to the best of my ability.
1. Havoc is terminally insane. Like if you touch him it might set off a reaction that would end in assault with intent to kill. He's pretty messed up from all the bad stuff that happened to him so that makes sense. The king doesn't intend to remove the control, he just doesn't want to lessen Havoc's effectiveness at murder by making him... Mostly sane. The spell triggers when he does somehing that goes against the master's desires like, in this case, eating children while they're still alive and screaming. It also mellows him out by dissipating some of the constant fear he feels. It's basically the reason he hasn't gone on a murderous rampage within minutes of just talking to somepony.
2. No. It doesn't work that way, it just means being a devoted mate and looking out for him and the rest of the herd. Sort of.
3. I think not. It would be incredibly difficult for him to f*** up this world as badly as his homeworld (there are things known as rape maggots there) and he'd have a lot of very skilled, very dangerous being to go through before he could even begin to imagine staging one. Though he will try, eventually. It's in his nature to conquer after all.
4. She does whatever the buck she wants to whomever she wants. Well almost anyway. If she wanted to be immersed in macaroni dinner while spooning three puppies and chewing on a goat she could have it. But mostly she just sticks to tamer fetishes. Like bondage. Also she technically broke consent laws when she mated with Havoc and Twilight alike, the legal age in my Equestria is nineteen.
5. Why midget alicorn? He's old, like really really really old. I'm going for the whole, ancient horse theme with him. Those things were smaller than modern ponies and had three toes you know. And this guy is older than unicorns as a species, younger than protocorns of course
, p.s. there it is.
6. That's part of why Havoc's so panicked. He doesn't want to suffer that fate in part because of what he saw back home. Also I figure it would take a few years for all that, alicorns take much longer to develop than ponies. He really is panicked. It's just that his former lifestyle has left him in a state of constant vigilance, show weakness and you get murdered and eaten. Not necessarily in that order.
7. He's not insulting, it's just that's pretty much all he can say without mentioning all the things he's literally taken a bite out of. Including ponies, and describing that would freak her out. He would compare it to palace fare but he wasn't really all there at the time, he was still tired see.
8. Well some of them. Others got stuck in cracks and rents made when Havoc went berzerk. Really really nasty in a fight that one. If you must, picture blood everywhere. Chunks of meat sprayed haphazardly and bits of beak and feather interspersed amongst the gore that coats the floor of the bloody cavern. Shards of bloody metal are scattered throughout the darkness, glinting wetly in the light from beyond. The corpses stick because the bones are all broken and they've been literally splattered against the surface. Its the same reason that those sticking flingy things get stuck to walls or ceiling and you have to stretch to reach them and its very annoying, especially when they get flattened against it. Curse you sticky green groper!
And I got them all, hopefully this satisfies you. If not point out the stuff that doesn't make sense and I will... try to figure out how to better put my mind on this computer.
Awesome.
What species of dragon is Spike the normal kind or the live forever kind?
494590
Mutant Draconis Immortalis. Normally they take a very long time to hatch under extreme conditions, by hatching him with magic Twilight basically ripped his DNA and wrote her signature in place of the lost chunks. You'll see how this affected him (besides altering his coloration) next chapter. I may have forgotten to say "Thank you for your loyal readership comrade Supbrony."
Gotta be my favourite fic on this site so far, loving it!!!
499204
Aaah, the wonderful metallic taste of pride. Your comment does my heart good and inspires me to write faster friend. Thank you for reading.
Still hoping for OCs. PM me if you want to include your OC in the story. Write out what you basically want for them, e.g. they get with Twilight or kick butt on an army, and I'll see what I can do. If you have nothing in mind for them I'll apply my mighty brain and figure it out. Make sure to be descriptive give details like coloration and size. I can't work with: male, white shirt, blue jeans pants, blue eyes. Just not gonna happen. I can but you might not like what you get. A little history on the OC would help me empathize properly, I use that as a term meaning get their head.Thank you.
several things:
The story is amazing so far and the species you create are amazing.
Your description of armor is very detailed and so complicated it must be effective.
Havoc's homeworld keeps getting scarier and he keeps getting more violent. keep it up, but give havoc a few silly moments from time to time. this chapter had fewer silly moments than usual i think.
Are the clubs with the obsidian in them based on the on weapons that the Mayans used?
I'm a little confused as to the size of creatures in your story. Would you be willing to describe how tall and long they are using a recognizable measuring system?
How old are princess Celestia and Luna compared to the majority of Alicorns.
That's about it keep up the good work.
525437
Added silliness? Definitely working on that. Hint, watch out for rainbows.
And yes, yes they are! My design however called for the wood to be warped into shape to maintain a tight grip through holes carefully chipped into two long blades rather than numerous small chunks being embedded into the wood.
Onto size... Royal guards in my head are four times the size of the average mare. the average mare is three and a half feet tall or 3'6" at the top of her head when she stands comfortably. Correct me if the symbols are misplaced. I use mares for the average height because they look to outnumber males by a five to one ratio, that or females are just more likely to join crowds. Anyways, three feet six inches tall and four feet long give or take an inch, I use from chest to rear for length. The proportions are a little more realistic with heads being chest sized rather than almost as big as the body. Average stallions are about four feet tall and five feet long, while the enormous Royal Guard are typiclly about five feet six inches in height and about six feet in length. Celestia on the other hand is six feet and seven inches tall and seven feet and five inches in length. Big girl. Havoc is a full three feet and four inches taller, which makes him nine foot eleven. A giant of a horse. His length is eleven feet and two inches. Onto horn length, I figure Celestia's horn is about six and a half feet long. It seems to be very similar to show proportions anyway. Her horn looked like it was a long as she was so with a little adjustment I get a more believable but still close length. Havoc has a horn that is fully nine feet long, which is why he usually has to duck to enter buildings. Twilight has an average size horn that is seven inches long. The typical female pegasus has wings that are three feet long and two broad which gives her a seven foot wingspan, counting the body between them. Alicorns and pegacorns have greater wingspans as do gryphons and none can match dragons proportionately. A pegacorn is also bigger than regular ponies, typically around five feet and eight inches in height while six feet long. The wing size for such a pegacorn would be six feet long and four broad, as opposed to Celestia's own eight foot long five foot broad wings. Horn length for said pegacorn would be four feet long. The average alicorn is six feet in height and six feet and eight inches long with a wingspan of eighteen feet, once more counting the body between them. Horn length for the typical alicorn is five feet. Alicorn horns are long and thin, also harder than typical pony horns. Hard enough to be use as a very lethal weapon. Gryphons average royal guard sized females and males are typically seven feet tall and eight long. Wingspan for said female would be fifteen feet, due to six and a half foot long wings that are also four feet broad. Dragon wingspans are typically twice their length to support that huge body, magic and the very heat they produce allows them to fly. Get the picture?
The father is twenty two thousand, eight hundred and seventy six. Celestia is nine thousand and fifty seven years old. Luna is eight hundred years younger than she. The original forty are on average nineteen thousand but over half don't remember when they were born as they were orphans. That's right, it took him over ten thousand years to make them, and little brother was one thousand years old when he got thrown out, four thousand, three hundred and fifty two now. I half randomize the smaller numbers. This adequate enough for you? Cause the king has a little under six hundred daughters overall. He would have more but it takes a long time for alicorns to grow up and he usually isn't in the mood.
Thank you for asking questions my friend. They help us all.
Frozen gasoline! I forgot to publish?!
Although being an alicorn did provide some funny material, TURN HIM BACK INO A HUMAN!!!!
580370
Erm, what? I'm sorry but I don't know how to respond to that. Not without spilling spoilers everywhere anyway. Would you be so kind as to explain the reasoning behind this demand/request, good sir/madam?
I haven't finished the chapter yet, but here is a few things.
Your version of pinkie pie is almost as scary as cupcakes pinkie pie.
Havoc's freak out at the rainbows was hilarious and definitely added the silliness i asked for.
I'll finish tomorrow.
So Apparently Tomorrow meant 2 days from now.
To start off the comments I want to say that You have done an awesome job with this chapter.
The battle against the wolves was really cool.
I feel bad for Rainbow Dash, Having Physical relations with anypony/anything with corrosive in the name sounds unpleasant.
Since Celestia and Luna are the highborn does that mean that they are stronger than other individual alicorns minus their father? How powerful are the first forty and their children? Magic power in thaums would be awesome.
What is the extent of Thrash's magical powers.
Is Havoc going to attain a grudge against everyone?
How is scorch feeding?
Are zebragus rare? Do zebracorns exist?
3000 hours is a huge sentence for community service, is the service parties?
Since corrosive is part dragon does that mean he will outlive rainbow dash? if so would he take his own life like in Romeo and Juliet?
Why did you make spike have angst? Also the slavery, he is more of an indentured servant in my opinion.
Are Alicorns truly immortal or are they just immune to disease and the effects of the ages but can die from injuries?
Are the wolves overall shaped like diamond dogs or like actual canines?
Keep up the good work with the story.
please.
597936
Alright, let's do this.
1. They were given the title because of their magical might and various achievements, so yeah they are seriously strong. Strong enough to kick the individual butts of any of the forty or their siblings. As for comparative might? Well the Father being the strongest has incredible might, his raw power tops off at approximately 211,500 thaums per second. Might not sound much higher than Havoc's even 200,000 but when you look at the others it becomes clear. Celestia has around 100,000 thaums and Luna is close at 87,000, well she will be when she fully matures. The forty average at 68,000-70,000. They are mightier by far than their children who are between 50,000 and 60,000. Which kicks the collective crap out of the average unicorn who creates from 200 to 1,000 thaums per second. Twilight is of course far beyond the rabble.
2. Thrash is rather skilled naturally. In direct terms he makes 12,000 thaums per second so even if he doesn't specializein it he can probably do it. He can form a cloak of shadow, bend light around himself, freeze and thaw stuff, alter a less powerful beings resistance to cold, create sophisticated illusions, pinpoint pressure points with a thought, make small shields to soften his impacts or at least protect individual parts, utilise magic to mess with gravity on a localised scale (generally to allow him to climb smooth surfaces or walk on ceilings), he can even do a little mind bending. By that I mean he can do things like convince his foes to kill their own grandmother's by reaching into their minds and doing a little reconfiguration. a very useful skill in a place where there are bears three stories tall.
3. Havoc hates everything on some level, but no. However he really doesn't like his situation nor does he like being seriously injured or tricked.
4. Scorch feeds by reaching into his prey's minds and drawing select emotions into himself. He channels the raw emotion from an organ fused into his brain into his equivalent of a stomach where a complex series of organs converts the emotion into energy, some of which is in turn utilized to generate the materials his body requires to sustain itself. The rest is gained from breathing and, if low on energy, drinking.
5. Zebragus are not particularly common but I wouldn't quite call them rare. The originals, and some new ones, hail from a hybridization of zebra and pegasus. And yes there are a few zebracorns, if you refer to hybrids of zebra and alicorn. If I had gone further in depth in Sandislan you would have seen them. There are also unzebra, hybrids of unicorn and zebra, as well as hybrids of earth pony and zebra. Most of them are unfortunately sterile however.
6. The service is not parties, not directly. She can organize them if they are important to the community. Mainly she has to help immigrants, provide aid to new conquests, and clean up trash. And yes that is a lot of time, would you allow any less for sexually assaulting the princess that moves the moon?
7. He might outlive her, and he probably would kill himself. Or, if he's still alive, just ask Havoc to do it. Havoc loves killing so having someone ask him to kill them would make his day.
8. I made him angst so that I would have something better than "blinded by thoughts of Rarity" for originality. Indentured servant works too. Though I'm pretty sure you've seen the way he's treated, not all the time but often enough. Then again few notice how violent those ponies are.
9. On the subject of immortality, they may as well be. They are immune to poison and illness, they regenerate rapidly and can do so for injuries of otherwise fatal caliber, they stop aging in their prime, they have vast magic to prevent death if regeneration fails, they are far stonger than their bodies indicate, they have a great resistance to heat and cold (not as great as a dragon's of course), and they are very difficult to injure. A single battle between even two determined alicorns can last for months or even years without end. In my opinion gods can die but its rather hard to kill them.
10. Actual canines. Ever seen wolves or huskies? Kinda like that only with thumbs. D-dogs have longer and more muscular arms, they also have much thinner fur or none at all. D-dogs have differently shaped snouts and ears that are more sensitive to vibration, as you have seen they also have tails like clubs. D-dogs don't need as much oxygen as regular canines and can handle methane and carbon dioxide build up with ease. And most D-dogs lack irises, they also prefer the darkness and weaker light of their torches as opposed to the light of Terra's sun. D-dogs are not built for cold.
Hope these explanations satisfy you my friend. Unfortunately I hardly got anything done last Tuesday due to watching over an ill friend of mine
. Will try to pick up the pace today and tommorow.
This chapter was awesome if a little disturbing.
My favorite parts of this chapter were thrash's dirty thoughts and when havoc woke up from the terrifying nightmare.
Have you mentioned Corrosive dash's cutie mark? If he has one what is it of?
I'm a little confused as to what was going on with Chrysalis in this chapter. Was the real Chrysalis playing an active part in havoc's nightmare? When he went into his mindscape was that some for of telepathy or communication and they were all conversing, if so how did he miss their other conversation? could you pretty please explain what was happening involving Chrysalis in this chapter?
Is Havoc's stallionhood really the source of his power because that would kind of funny but sad for him?
Does Havoc dream the future?
are the CMC all grown up?
Luna said that she tried to stop the nightmare. Does this mean That she was watching the nightmare or just aware that he was having it?
I apologize if any of my questions are ever too critical or criticizing but i am merely curious.
I look forward to the next chapter.
613266
Thank you! The intent was for it to be disturbing. I generally don't think rape is funny.
1. Have not and not sure. I'll ask the creator soon.
2. She was playing an active role in the nightmare. She jumped into his mind through Scorch and decided to make sure that her kind didn't earn the ire of the big predator that kicks butt on dragons. As for the mindscape, she basically used his mind as a medium foor communications. She generated an environment and pulled Havoc in. They all manifested themselves as either the way they currently appeared or the way they should have appeared. The mindscape mimicked realworld rules so the pair were able to converse in secret. Yeah Chrysalis can be confusing but she's got a master plan in the works and what she's doing is relevant.
3. Well it's not necessarily the reproductive organ. Its everything associated with being a male. The aggression, the strength, the size, the testosterone that surges through his veins with every heartbeat. Without all that he's reduced to an easily intimidated little mare. Not being a sexist here, just saying. As far as I know males are expected to be tougher than females, among other things.
4. He does not see the future in his dreams, not accurately anyway. He may see potential futures but those are coincidences. Generally he just has dreams that are unpleasant in the extreme.
5. The CMC are teenaged. They found their purpose in life and have set about pursueing their careers of choice.
6. She was in his mind, observing and actively trying to alter it. She and Chrysalis both worked to combat it, they used differing methods of course but the result was the same. Chrysalis made herself known and directly targetted him after she tried subtly altering his mental patterns. Luna was more distant and kept influencing elements present in the dream in an attempt to keep him from going on a rampage upon waking.
I hope my answers are satisfactory.
i need more, please give me more soon. please
does this mean this fic is starting again, i hope so!
..... is this a side story or is it relevent to the main plot.....plz bring back the main plot i liked it.
885434
Meh, not particularly relevant but it is related. Just something that popped up during my recent phase of depression... and stuff.
885377>>885434
Hay yeah it's coming back! If I work diligently I should be able to get the next one out and in by tomorrow or the day after. Been busting my brain and staying up for far too long to get myself in gear. Thanks by the way, you guys have no idea what you do for me.
885481
sweet i needed a new havoc fix
This was awesome even if it isn't super related to the story. I'm glad to the hear that the story is starting back up. Sorry to here about a phase of depression and i wish you the best in the future.
Quick question, have you by any chance been aquainted with a manga/anime called Hellsing because the the man in black reminds me of a character from it with a somewhat similar outfit and the ability to survive barrages of bullets?
886234
Actually yes. Didn't notice that until you mentioned it. He has very little in common with the venerable Alucard truth be told. I actually had more of a western theme in mind for him, ever hear of an animation on youtube called Backwater Gospel? That's where I got the birds. I did add variety, violence, and a menacing hint of something cruel to those birds. Well, wish I could stay but I haven't slept in, probably, over fifteen hours. Imma go... Gonna go sleep now, enjoy the... I forgot the word just now. Meh, be happy dude/dudette.
613266
. When I woke up the next morning I didn't have enough focus to remember it and I doubt I'd have had the time.
It's been far too long since I answered this. Messed up part is, everyday I would remember but I was always too tired to do so
In the creator's own words:
his cutie mark is a green lightning bolt on the shield and behind the shield are 2 flaming swords: it represents protection
I hope I am forgiven, and if not I totally get it.
yay
so he no longer has the limiter on his horn and he can be as cruel as he wants? and has two brains fighting for dominance? shit just got real...
To start off this was a good chapter. there was a lot of stuff going on and silly things were happening all over the place.
It's good to know that the CMC's talent for destroying ruining and overall messing things up has grown as they age.
1. In the far off future do Havoc's other personalities split off of the original body and if they do which is the one that visited 17-year old Havoc? Are their fates similar to the one we saw or do they have better/worse fates?
2. Do the elements of harmony live very long lives?
3. What are lifespans like in your story and how can magic affect them?
4. How can magic affect the physical form and abilities of beings? How can it affect physical prowess and anatomy, it it always permanent and can it be permanent? mostly asking because of the paladins, Spot Star, and the arcanidine.
5. Is it possible for havoc to die, both in the present and the future?
6. How have the dick headed slug armed people of Havoc's homeworld not been driven to extinction by the other aggressive crazy people and creatures of the world?
Yay for a more violent next chapter.
901753
Thank you for the enthusiasm!
1 Yah they do. And they do it spectacularly too. The one that happened to visit seventeen year old Havoc was actually a much older variant of the dominant personality, he does have a very good reason for being that way. Since its not a spoiler I can easily tell you that Hybrid and Child get off scot free while the other two, not so much.
2 Their lives are extended by the old and powerful magic of the elements but without outside assistance they would die after about two and a half thousand years and probably start to go mad during the five hundreds. Normal ponies have long potential lives but their minds aren't built to handle the vast amount of time alicorns have available to them.
3 Depends really. Ponies have long lives but in the wild they would be prey so they developed a rapid breeding cycle. Don't need many males to knock up a herd of females.
But, for example, a Lupus Empire wolf might have eighty years and he'd be lucky. Then again, they are more violent and their culture is highly militant which results in a shorter life expectancy.
A zebra thing from Jungu' this has a maximum of a hundred and twenty years but they don't have organised warfare, which would reduce it much further. You might say, "But isn't that a primeval jungle full of terrible monsters and diseases?" You would be right. But they are used to it, they have adapted, evolved, they know it and they live it. They don't breed very quickly but they do take time to care for their young and teach them how to survive in their rough world, which is why that male from before was so affected.
Circumstances and genetics influence the length of one's life considerably. As for the whole magic thing? Well... Er... Lets just say that with enough magic, you can either live forever or turn into a mote of dust within less than a second. All depends on how you use it mate. Like magical contamination, it depends on the intent of the spell it comes from or whatever the source does as well as one's genes. A pony might gain an extra five centuries to a millenium from a botched calcification spell because stone takes longer to wear down than flesh does, or he might die a slow and painful death within a few hours as opposed to seconds. Then again if he or she just kept getting rejuvenations or extra doses of energy to fuel their life force they could keep going without suffering the painful process that is being turned to stone yet surviving. You get me?
4 Ah yes, the affects of magic on one's abilities and physical properties. A fine subject if I do say so myself. Once more, it depends on how you use it. If it is something that I will say is subtle but may be blatantly obvious, like a new horn or tougher skin, then you do it once and it’s that way until something else changes it. But if you wanted to put a shield on something permanently then you'd best attach something to maintain it, otherwise it'll fade as soon as its charge runs out.
Another example: A pony wants to be stronger, he has nice muscle definition but wants to impress the ladies with incredible feats of strength without having to grow enormous bulging muscles that might look unsightly. So he gets some mage to put a strength enhancing spell on him and make it permanent. He can either choose to get regular supplements to recharge the spell, or he can buy some sort of item to tote around or get an implant that will either keep the spell charged on its own or draw energy from some other source. This source may well be the stallion's own body, pony souls generate a nice and very smooth charge indefinitely until they get old or die.
Physical forms... mmm, magic can have damning effects or be a blessing in the right mind. I'll use the paladins for this one. Now as you probably know, Paladins are some sadistic little ponies. You don't expect that stuff from worshippers of the seemingly nice mistress of the sun but part of the reason they are that way is so that she can stay the kind and beautiful solar princess she looks like. The glowing in the eyes is a side effect of one of those permanent spells I mentioned. The magic basically gives them ten more years of life and makes them better killers. The glow is the result of the combat aspect of the magic activating inside them to make them faster, stronger, more blood hungry, and increase their thought speed and keep their minds clear.
5 Yes and yes. Well, he won’t die in the present because that would go directly against his realities flow but he could die in the future. If you want I can tell you how one would go about killing him, not like it’s a big secret or anything.
6 They survived by hiding in tunnels underground and generally staying out of sight. The slug arms gave them amazing climbing abilities. But they went extinct when Havoc’s people entered their territory, can’t breed when the last few are all neutered now can they?
899431
Pretty much and sort of. Thing is, they don't really need brains to function.
So confused with all these side stories, can we just continue with havoc wreaking shit? :D
936149 I agree with you. While these side-stories are awesome, we want to read about Havoc and his conquest.
Aiight. Working on it.
937273
Thank chu!
You Shalt be rewarded
images3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20110823072035/callofduty/images/e/ed/R16066_MLP_Applejack_Spooky.gif Oops
But now...