Chapter Eight - Expectations and how to thoroughly destroy them
They stared at Snowy in silent shock as she finished her sandwich, though Walter was mildly more composed than Paradox.
As she took the last bite and swallowed it down, she turned again to the rooms occupants, and said "No seriously what? Your starring as if you just saw the princesses doing the Hopak, what gives?" The silence continued as Paradox attempted to do compose himself. "Have I got milk on my nose or something?" she scrunched up her snout as she tried to look at her nose.
her deep concentration was disturbed by a light snickering sound. Snowy looked up to see Paradox, with his face scrunched up, a hoof over his mouth, and trying his hardest not to laugh.
It went on for half a minute, till he managed to find to still his sniggers and look up, at the very unimpressed Snowy, who had her hooves crossed and her eyebrow raised.
"Is there something amusing about me?" she said coldly.
Paradox couldn't help it, it was too surreal. He burst out in what Snowy considered the weirdest laugh she had ever heard. it resembled it was halfway between a full-blown laugh and a fit of giggles, with no little amount of hyena thrown in for texture. He half-fell to the floor, his rump in the air, still laughing like a maniac.
Snowy was bewildered, no-one had laughed at her in years (at least, not for long at any rate) and yet here was this pegasus, laughing like she was some form of stand up comedian. She felt like she should be angry right about now, but it was eclipsed by her general confusion. 'Most ponies are generally intimidated by me, is it because he is ignorant, stupid, or just plain dense?' She thought. With most ponies she met, she could make them uncomfortable just by being in her presence for extended periods, she was proud of it, she could make the most uppity noblestallion shuffle his hooves uncomfortably and make some excuses not to be there, and even the most brazen cat-caller would fall to her cold demeanor and dry wit... with the exception of her colleges, but they were all odder than she was, so it didn't count. Yet this stallion, while initially nervous, had suddenly become brazened and carefree, it was baffling.
Snowy surfaced from her thoughts to find the stallion still laughing. 'Mind you,' she thought her expected irritation finally rising, 'If he doesn't stop laughing, I'm going to give him a reason to be intimidated.'
Luckily for Paradox, Walter Chose this time to interrupt his mirth due to the rather murderous look the mare was now giving his young charge.
"Paradox sir, it might be wise to stop, you appear to be offending your guest," he said diplomatically. A statement that Snowy thought was a major understatement.
Paradox managed to fall off his chair properly, before clambering back up, still overcome with silent giggles.
"Sorry..." He said, finally managing to put a lid on it, but still grinning. "Its just that you looked so adorable with your eyes crossed"
Snowy's eye twitched "Adorable!?" She exclaimed.
"Yeah" he said happily, before noticing her twitching eye and barely restrained grimace. "Are you ok? you look kind of off." he said with concern.
Snowy's internal monologue went something like this: 'Calm yourself Snowy, its not as if he is intending this, he is just an idiot-He called me adorable!-Just because somepony is stupid is no reason to destroy them-Nopony calls me adorable!-thats a lie, my father calls me adorable all the time, to most people its a compliment, its not like its an insult, like shorty or midg-Grrrr!-Ok, Ok! calm down its just an example. geez I can be such a baby sometimes-Hey!-Oh stop wining, but seriously think rationally about this for a minute-Isn't that what I'm for?-Then care to shut up and let me speak then?-...Al-right, fine, what is it?-He is currently my host, he has taken me in, treated my injuries, and most importantly has fed me-It was a Nice sandwich...-Exactly, not to mention that I don't like the way he said 'a real Pony' as if this is not only his first time seeing an equine, but until now he considered them fake, which is odd, considering he is one-So I pump him for info, then destroy him?-Not this again, no we don't destroy him, what is wrong with me-Hey! I'm not half as crazy as me-And what's that supposed to mean?-At least I'm not talking to myself-...Yes I am-...Dammit, walked into that one-Lets just talk to the guy and move on with my live, agreed?-Agreed.'
Snowy was suddenly aware of a hand waving in front of her face, and the butler, who had yet to be named, saying, "...she seems to be having some sort of mental break-down sir, should I..."
"I'mfine!" she said quickly, brushing the hand away and giving her head a quick shake, "Just lost in thought."
"Are you sure? You were out for a full minute" Said Paradox, blissfully unaware of the internal conflict he had caused.
"Yes, yes fit as a fiddle" she said tersely, "and while your concern is appreciated, I would much rather we return to our previous conversation."
"Umm... Which one?" He said sheepishly, poking the tips of his fore-hooves together apologetically.
Snowy sighed heavily "The one where I inquired to my location, and where you proceeded to freak out," she dead-panned.
He had stopped playing with his hooves, only to start rubbing the back of his neck again, "Yeheh, sorry about that, its just that when I heard you were from Equestria, I kinda got exited."
"Kinda?" Snowy thought. Aloud she said "And why is that exactly? Ponies from Equestria are not uncommon, it has the largest Pony population on Equus, but judging from your reaction, you seem surprised that I come from there..." She paused for a moment "...Or is it more accurate to say that you are surprised to find out that Equestria exists at all?" She then turned to Walter, "And then there is the company you keep, no offence but I have never seen, nor heard of a creature like you on Equus, Mr...?"
"My Name is Walter, miss," He said, not liking this mare interrogative method.
"Snowy Bitterfrost, charmed." She said, before continuing with her deductions "Also this bed, it also seems rather long for an pony, meaning that this was most likely intended for a creature of a larger stature, it also looks pre-fabricated, meaning that this is most likely a standard size, which implies that ponies are not the dominate species," she gave a smug smirk for a moment at her powers of logic and deduction, before drooping at the logical conclusion.
She sighed again before looking at Paradox and Walter, saying, "Just give it too me strait, I'm not on Equus, Am I?"
The duo looked at each other before Paradox finally spoke up, "You are on the planet Earth, and... You are the first Pony I have ever met."
Snowy's reaction was quite tame given the circumstances, she calmly laid down, rolled onto her stomach, burred her head in her pillows, took a deeeep breath, and screamed into them as loud as she could.
Paradox and Walter recoiled at the volume, despite it being muffled by the pillows 'Quite the lungs on her for such a small creature' thought Walter.
Her scream eventually petered out into repeating the word "Dammit!" over and over, while slamming her hoof onto the bed, unfortunately making a light pomfing noise and not conveying her emotions at all.
When her shouting finally ceased, her hoof slumped down, and she sat there motionless, the only sound being her breathing.
"Are... are you ok?" said Paradox, in what could be considered the understatement of the century.
"Yeah... Peachy." Snowy's Voice was slow and deliberate, almost venomous.
"Sorry," said Paradox looking downcast.
Snowy slowly lifted herself off the mattress and into a prone position "Don't Apologize for things you had nothing to do with," her expression back to irritated deadpan, though slightly more irritated than before, "Its bad enough without somepony else apologizing for my own failures, it just adds insult to injury."
"Sorry." Paradox said again.
"And don't apologize for apologizing!" Snowy snapped "Its pathetic and painful to watch."
"Sor..." Paradox began
"We are not starting this gag," Snowy snapping again "Its overused."
"What?" Said Paradox, who was having trouble keeping up with the mare.
Snowy seemed to stop for a moment, before resting her head in one of her hooves. She gave a sigh before saying "You must excuse me, I seem to be having one of those days." She took some deep breaths, just like her therapist once taught her, and thought of a mountain stream.
'I am the stream, I am cool and gentle as I flow down the mountain. I am not calm, I am the calm, let the calm flow through me like the stream... that I also am... I have successfully confused myself and I am no longer angry. Thank-you therapy.'
She straitened up "Better now." she announced.
"Are you sure?" Said Paradox, concerned.
"Positive." She said.
There was yet again another uncomfortable silence, and Paradox fitted as he once again tried to think of what to say, or more importantly how to say it.
Snowy surprisingly helped in this regard, "You've got something on your mind, spit it out."
Paradox started, before hurriedly saying, "Could I please ask you some questions"
Snowy raised an eyebrow. "What sort of questions?"
Paradox shifted uncomfortably. "Well, you know, about yourself, and about Equestria."
Snowy thought about this for a moment before shrugging, "sure why not," she said "But not all at once, no need to rush things, after all," she grimaced, "I'm not going anywhere anytime soon, and we might as well get better acquainted."
If Paradox was put off by Snowy's less than enthusiastic response, he didn't show it "Ok" He said, and with only a brief pause to compose himself, he asked his first question "What was that thing you did earlier?"
"...What?" Said Snowy, 'amazed' at the stallions eloquence in phrasing.
"You know, the Glowy thing you did." He said, in a way that even he thought was lame.
"Oh that" she said dismissively, "That was just my affinity recharging."
She was met with two blank stares, "As in magic affinity?" The stares continued. Snowy sighed "A magical affinity is the type of ability held by ponies, they are mostly elemental, and certain types are quite common among earth ponies and Pegasi, such as earth and wind respectively, however rarely unicorns get one too, and they become incredibly proficient in one area of magic, while making all others incredibly difficult, this can lead to ponies becoming powerful elemental mages such as cryomancers, Pyromancers and similar, or it can help them in their special talent like a musician with a sound affinity. However affinities come with a drawback and it is that it is not unlimited, unlike the 'arcane affinity' as scholars call it, which is natural to unicorns, which is one third mental focus, another physical exertion and one other a mana pool being constantly replenished by ambient magical energy, our magic reserves are finite and can only be recharged by certain actions, environments, materials or foodstuffs. For example somepony with a water will get replenished by drinking, swimming or even touching water, even being near a large body of water will help, as that means that they can draw the power strait from the source without relying on their own limited magic. However not all Affinities have this problem such as the pre-mentioned Earth and air, both of which are so abundant that you are rarely out of your element."
Paradox was hooked on every word, soaking in the information about magic (not that she minded the attention). when she had stopped her little lecture he asked another question "What affinity are you then?" Noticing that she hadn't mentioned it.
Snowy hesitated for a moment, before deciding that no harm could come from it, and stated "I have a chaos affinity."
Paradox started "Chaos? What, like Discord?!"
Snowy frowned. For somepony who had apparently never been to Equestria and never met another pony, he seemed particularly well informed. Aloud she said "Yes like discord, and no, I am not acquainted, in the employ or in any way associated with the self proclaimed lord of chaos, and I definitely do not, nor have I ever, worshipped him, despite what anyone in college may have told you." The speech was well rehearsed and one which she has used a lot.
"Oh" Said Paradox, Drooping slightly, he seemed disappointed. But he perked up quickly "but you can still do similar stuff that he can." his voice containing a buzz of excitement.
Snowy was getting confused again, this was not the usual reaction to somepony finding out that she had powers similar to one of the most dangerous beings in Equestria, Rather than the expected suspicion, fear and/or downright rudeness, this stallion was acting as if she knew sapphire shores or something.
"Well, yes I have similar powers to discord," she conceded, Paradox's response threw her for a loop.
"Can you show me?" he said.
Snowy mind froze. 'did he just ask me to show him my magic? Is he, another pony, an actual normal pony, actually expressing an interest in my talent?' The only ponies who ever expressed an interest, were her parents, anyone else either already knew or didn't care. Not that it mattered as she viewed most ponies she met as simpletons who were not worth it anyway, but to find one who was actually interested was mildly jarring, if not slightly refreshing. But unfortunately...
"Can't," she said. Seeing the obvious question, she adds quickly "At least not now, My mana reserves are too low, and its rather exhausting to go over limit." She didn't wan't to mention that she was completely powerless when drained, no-one knew that, her 100% affinity was her closet guarded secret and would continue to be a secret as long as she lived, otherwise... She never liked to be weak, so her biggest weakness will be something she holds to her grave.
"Oh, ok" said Paradox, deciding to leave that for later and move on to his next question "So how does Chaos Affinity charge anyway?"
Snowy shrugged "Any number of ways, really the most prominent being spontaneous acts of chaos," she said "but I've always found that too messy and unreliable, so I always use chocolate Milk."
Paradox gave a snort, which caused Snowy to raise an eyebrow "Whats so funny about Chocolate Milk?"
Paradox waved his hoof "Oh nothing much, just a funny thought. But seriously, you can generate power through Chocolate milk?"
"Basically anything sugar or coco based," She said, "But I just use chocolate milk because it is conveniently has both along with calcium."
"So when you were generating power before, you were using the chocolate milk?" Paradox said, which Snowy nodded "But if you have already recharged, why are you still low?"
Snowy sighed, "It takes more than one carton to get me up to full strength" she said "Besides I spent a great deal of that power regenerating my injur... That reminds me." She looks down at her bandages, before grabbing the one of the ends in her golden aura "These were starting to rub anyway" and before either could stop her, with one swift movement, she unravelled the bandages, exposing her wound... perfectly pristine white fur, with no sign that anything that had ever been there. She did a few stretches to get the kinks out of her back, the other two occupants of the room once again in befuddlement.
Seeing the look she was being given she said "My affinity gives me unnaturally high regenerative powers to rapidly overcome almost any injury." She stated matter-of-factly.
"Cool," Said Paradox enthusiastically. he thought for a moment "Next question?" he said
"Shoot." Snowy replied.
"What does your cutie mark mean?" Asked Paradox, looking at the large eight pronged Snowflake emblazoned on her flank.
Snowy didn't look impressed "Ok first up, my eyes are over here," Paradox realizing what he was doing looked away embarrassed, "and Second, that's kinda a personal question, I mean how would you like it if I asked what your Cutie Mark... meant..." She slowly petered off as she noticed that his flank was very much bereft of any mark.
Now it was Snowy's turn to shuffle uncomfortably as Paradox's embarrassment increased.
"Uhhh, anyway... Next question?" Snowy said, eager to get away from this rather awkward faux pas, which Paradox was all to happy to oblige.
"Whats it like living in Equestria?" paradox Asked.
Snowy Scoffed "I'd save that one for later if I were you, I haven't got nothing to compare it to."
Paradox was not deterred "Canterlot, then."
"Now that's slightly more reasonable," Snowy Said, before considering the question, before saying "Its an aesthetically pleasing city, every part an architectural marvel, that is thoroughly spoiled by its general population, a bigger collection of idiots, bigots, mareanisers, gossips, and self entitled pricks you will never meet, and that's just the nobility."
"Oh" Said Paradox, he wasn't expecting an answer like that. A thought struck him, "But you are from Canterlot..."
"I advise you not to continue that line of thought," Said Snowy Casting a venomous glare.
Walter, Despite the thinly veiled threat, he could help but internally chuckle at both his charges lack of tact, and the young Unicorn's touchiness.
"Anyway," said Paradox, "Next question, have you ever met Princess Celestia or Luna?"
"Well I yet to meet Luna, though I have seen her from time to time," She said, "As for Celestia, yeah I met her, but so then did Pretty much everyone who went to her school." Yes, Celestia always took the time to get to know every student that passed through those doors... especially troubled students.
"You went to Celestia's school for gifted Unicorns!" Paradox exclaimed, once again demonstrating his ability to get exited at the weirdest things, "Does that mean that you would know twilight sparkle!"
Snowy couldn't help but chuckle "Nope, she was way after my time, I was already in high-school by the time she enrolled there" Paradox seemed slightly disappointed, Snowy sensing this said "Though I did go with her brother, if that's any consolation."
He perked up at that "You knew Shining Armor?"
"Well, 'knew' is kinda a strong word" She said slowly "We never talked, and in my opinion, he was kind of thick."
Paradox looked curious, "Really? How so?"
Snowy Sniggered "How oblivious he was that one of his best friends had a major crush on him," She gave an uncharacteristic giggle "it took Cadence almost the whole of high-school to work up the nerves to confess, took the poor idiot completely by surprise."
Paradox couldn't help finding that amusing, and laughed with Snowy.
"So anyway, have you got anymore questions? I think one more is all I can take for now" She said, being questioned really took it out of a mare.
Paradox suddenly looked nervous again, "Well, there is one more thing I would like to know..." He said hesitantly.
Snowy didn't like the sound of this.
"I couldn't help but notice that I'm rather tall compared to you..." he continued.
'Oh don't you dare.' Snowy thought, glaring.
"So I was wondering..."
'Here it comes.' She thought gritting her teeth.
"... Am I some sort of giant?"
'I knew it!-Wait what?' Snowy did a mental double take.
...
"... Excuse me could you repeat that?" Said Snowy.
"Am I some sort of Giant Pony" Said Paradox pensively.
'He's Joking.'
In the silence Paradox continued, "I mean there is rather significant size difference between us..."
'He can't be serious.'
"So I was worried that I was abnormally large..." He stated, and his anxiety only increased in Snowy's silence.
'And yet he is serious.'
"...Its true isn't it? I am some sort of freakishly large pony!" he said in a panicky tones.
Snowy Finally caught up with the present, and noticed a panicking Paradox and said hurriedly, "What? No! your not large! well actually you are kind of taller than normal... But not by much!"
This stopped his little panic attack but he still looked pensive, and there was the unheard question in the air.
Snowy sighed, "Your not giant," she said, "I'm just... Short," The last word said through gritted teeth.
"...Oh." Said Paradox, "...Sorry."
"Didn't I already tell you not to apologize for things you had nothing to do with," Said Snowy irritably.
"No, I mean't sorry for bringing it up, its clearly an uncomfortable subject, and it was tactless of me," He apologized sincerely.
Snowy stared incredulously. "...Thanks." She said slowly.
Silence reigned, though it was not awkward, just the silence where nothing needed to be said.
Eventually Paradox said "So since you will be staying here for a while, and you seem to have recovered from your injuries, would you like to be shown around the house?"
Snowy's eyebrow raised, "So your fine with a complete stranger staying in your home?"
Paradox shrugged, "Your a pony just like me, so I don't see why not."
Snowy looked at Paradox, the strange stallion who was apparently all the only one of his kind. 'What's your game Mister Millar' she thought 'I've got my eye on you.' Aloud she said "Sure, why not?" and hopped out of bed.
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Paradox is pretty dense.
take your time with the story. You can definitely see paradox's social skills in action.
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That's the problem, he never developed any social skills, the only company he has ever had was his parents, Walter, and a younger sister. He has never had any social contact outside his direct family, and possibly a few online interactions, he's dense because he doesn't know how to read people, especially ponies, so Snowy is a complete Enigma to him.
5573238
that was more sarcastic than serious
5573248 Sorry, I guess I just like to explain myself
5573264
lol, it's ok. sarcasm doesn't come over text well either
5573267 That's for sure, I tend to stick a trollestia emoticon in my comments when I'm not being serious.
this guy is socially deprived it's not so much him being dense as to just not knowing what to do or how to respawn to others.
this story's abit of a enigma never read anything even remotely close to this. i'm really enjoying this, i mean i absolutely love it.
you have earned yourself a nose boop i492.photobucket.com/albums/rr289/axlthehedgehog_2008/responses/tumblr_m2gfw2gtbw1r6i662o1_r1_500_by_scarlett_novel-d7b3svf.png
stayclassy
5676627
*Gets booped*
fimfiction-static.net/images/story_images/24284.png
But seriously, thanks!
I'm glad you like my story, and I'm ecstatic that you find my story unique.
I was planning to waste the rest of my evening Playing Sims 3, but because of this, I think I'll get some more work on the next chapter!
I am the definition of classy...
derpicdn.net/img/2013/3/11/268212/full.png
5676976 classy derpy?.....i492.photobucket.com/albums/rr289/axlthehedgehog_2008/responses/5d2593adb12e52ff8b63f09699e6c753.png
stayclassy