So, Lyra Walks Into a Bar...
Berry Punch looked at the mare in front of her with a skeptical eye. “Another? Really?”
Bon Bon glared, throwing a small bag of bits on the bar. “I’ll tell you when I’ve had enough.”
Berry shrugged, and held up the bottle of wine. “The same, then?”
“Less talk, more wi––”
She got no further as the door to the Happy Cola (formerly, Pony Up) Saloon burst open and a very familiar unicorn waltzed in, stopping the moment she spied Bon Bon. “Oh no. What are you doing in here?”
Bon Bon blinked. “Drinking.” She stretched her hooves wide. “Spoiler alert.”
“Mmm, so I see. Dare I even ask why you’d need a drink? Last I saw you were ‘happily living happily ever after in real time’...” She dropped herself heavily on the barstool next to Bon Bon, a motioning her hoof towards Berry. “Applejack Daniels. On the rocks.” She paused. “Better make it a double.”
Berry coughed, staring at the bottle in her hooves, upside down and empty. “I have some bad news for both of you.”
“No more wine?” Bon Bon gasped.
Lyra blinked. “No whiskey?”
“You’re drinking on a Monday afternoon… and we get our deliveries Tuesday morning.” Berry shrugged. “I have cider…?”
The two mares stared at one another.
A grimace crossed Lyra’s face, followed by a flash of anger, and finally, resignation. “Oh, fine. The hardest you got.”
Bon Bon laughed. “Well, we agree on something for once.”
Berry rolled her eyes. “There’s only one style of it, ladies.”
“Don’t care! Gimme!” Berry sighed and dropped two ciders onto the bar. Not even a second after, Lyra snatched her mug up and drained it in a split second. “Another!”
Watching the green mare next to her drink faster than a member of the Apple family, Bon Bon picked up her mug and drained hers as well. It took longer, but it was all gone in a matter of seconds. “You heard the mare. Another.”
Berry blinked, surprised that someone could drain a mug as fast as her. With another sigh, she dropped another in front of both of them. “This time, drink it slow or I’ll make you both wait for tomorrow’s delivery.” Berry stomped off, leaving the two of them alone in the bar.
“Ugh, fine.”
They stared at their mugs. Bon Bon cleared her throat. “They say it does taste better if you go slow…”
Lyra laughed, although there was little humor in it. “Hun, it’s Monday, it’s about twelve thirty, and we’re both drinking. We’re not here for the taste.”
For several minutes, they drank in silence, listening to the bar’s ambiance and clinking of glass around the saloon. Somehow, it was louder than it should have been, given that there was only the two of them. Lyra cast a sidelong look at Bon Bon, and Bon Bon returned the glance.
Finally, Lyra couldn’t stand the silence. “Alright! Spill it! Why the heck are you here?”
Bon Bon grunted. “I have good news for you. We don’t have to pretend to be friends anymore.”
“Oh?” Lyra grinned. “Do tell.”
“Octavia and I… we’re done.” Bon Bon took a long sip of cider. “In fact, every mare bearing a music-related cutie mark can just go to Tartarus.”
Lyra’s jaw hit the bar stop. “You’re kidding, right?” She gasped. “ You two… You two were downright perfect together!”
“Perfect,” Bon Bon repeated darkly, staring at her mug of cider.
Lyra paused, taking a swig. “No, wait. I think I can guess.”
Bon Bon looked at her. “Oh?”
Lyra nodded solemnly. “Vinyl and I… Heh. Guess I ain’t even gotta say it, do i?”
This time Bon Bon’s jaw hit the stop. “Wait… You as well?”
Lyra nodded. “Yep. Just a few hours ago. Spent the day getting my stuff out of her place and getting off that lease. Paperwork, I found, is a good distraction for a breakup.” A small chuckle escaped her lips into her mug.
“My mother always told me...” Bon Bon leaned back. “Never date a musician. They’ll sing when they tell lies, but they’ll break your heart all the same.” She wrinkled her nose. “Of course, my father was a musician.”
This earned Bon Bon a glare. “Not all of us do that…”
Bon Bon shrugged. “Sorry.”
Lyra took another sip, this time chuckling into her mug, “Though, she certainly proved your point... Was totally outta the blue, too. Vinyl just up and said ‘It’s not working, babe, I found a classical classy one. See ya!’ And that was it.”
Coughing violently, Bon Bon sent cider all over the bar top. “She found a what now?”
“Some classical music mare. I dunno. Wouldn’t tell me her name. Or she did and I missed it. I was a touch angry and sad and busy packing.” She motioned for yet another mug. “I’m not drunk enough for this yet. Anyway, what’s wrong?” Lyra grinned. “Can’t handle the Apple family recipe?”
Bon Bon stared at Lyra, her eyes burning holes into the other mare’s skull. “This classical music mare… did her name start with an ‘oh’?”
“Mmm, actually… I think it did.” She turned to Bon Bon, “Why? Is that important?”
Bon Bon continued to stare at Lyra. “There’s one reason we’re friends at all, Lyra. What’s her name?”
Lyra’s eyes boggled. “Wait. Waitwaitwait. You… You mean to tell me… That our marefriends dumped us for each other…?” A few seconds passed before Lyra let loose a huge booming laugh. “Oh, okay, oh Celestia… That is too good!”
Bon Bon stared at her with an incredulous look. Then she punched Lyra in the shoulder.
“Hey! That hurt!”
“It’s not funny!” Bon Bon shouted, hitting Lyra again. “It’s not funny it’s not it’s not funny!”
“Okay! Okay!” Lyra leaned back, out of her range, “I’m sorry!”
Bon Bon paused, her hoof hanging in the air. Then she started to cry.
Lyra sighed. “Aw, jeez, hun. Don’t––”
“I loved her, do you understand?” Bon Bon sobbed. “I…” She leaned over and collapsed onto to the bar.
Lyra winced, then slowly placed a hoof on her shoulder. “There there. It’s okay.”
“No it’s not!”
Lyra shrugged. “These things happen, you know?” Bon Bon kept crying. Lyra sighed. “How about one more round?”
Eventually, Bon Bon stopped crying. She was too busy drinking.
”But we were in love, Lyra! We agreed we wanted to spend the rest of our lives together…”
Pausing for a moment, Lyra tilted her head, lost in thought. “Well… Thinking of it now, this was kinda to be expected.”
Bon Bon stopped crying, looking up at her, tears still in her eyes. “How do you figure.” It wasn’t a question.
Lyra shrugged, draining the last of her cider and motioning for more. “Well, Octy and Viny? I dunno, gal, they just feel… Right for each other.” Bon Bon said nothing, staring at her blankly. “What? Do I look like a shipping specialist? They just have that nature to them!”
“But we promised…”
Lyra scoffed. “Heh. ‘We’, ‘we’, ‘we’... I’ve known Octavia longer than you. When did she ever promise anything?”
Bon Bon opened her mouth, but no words came out. Her eyes glazed over. “I guess it was more me promising, and her… not disagreeing.”
“HA! Sounds like Octy to a bloody T! Stuck up little...” Lyra laughed again and raised her mug up in a mock salute. “May they ‘wub’ each other long time!”
Bon Bon scowled at her. “You know, for someone who just had a break up, you’re being awfully flip.”
Lyra matched her stare, smirk etched on her face. “Tell me I’m wrong, mare. Tell me I’m wrong.”
After a few moments of prolonged staring, Bon Bon sighed. “Another drink? Just one more.”
They had another drink. Bon Bon stared at Lyra.
“Flip is better than despondent. How are you so cheerful?”
A shrug. “Hey, the alcohol helps. Why do you think I came here after dealing with that paperwork? Gal’s gotta drown her sorrows somehow and plus… I’m not ready to face the issue of where the hell I’m going stay! I’m homeless now, haven’t you figured it out?”
Bon Bon could only blink at that. She had simply never realized that was the case for Lyra. “But… Where will you go…?”
“I dunno. Heard tell that yellow pegasus, takes care of animals, will take any pony in who needs help.”
Bon Bon wrinkled her nose. “Butterfly?”
Lyra shrugged, “Sure, sounds right.”
“But… Where after that?”
“Who knows. Maybe back home to my parents’ house. I dunno. I haven’t burned all of my bridges yet.” Lyra drained the last of her mug, then noticed Bon Bon staring at her with… pity? “Look, I’m not one for plans, I make things up on the fly.”
Bon Bon shrugged. “One more round?”
“Just ONE more. I’m broke, you know…”
They had another drink.
“You...” Bon Bon shuffled her hooves about. “You… You could… ”
Pausing mid-sip, Lyra looked at Bon Bon. “No no, what? I could what?”
Bon Bon shuffled about more and looked downward, almost like she was avoiding the gaze of Lyra. ”You shouldn’t have to stay with some poor pegasus you don’t even know. I’ve got a very empty apartment now, and a couch...“
“I didn’t catch that…” Lyra blinked. “Are you seriously offering me a place to crash?”
Bon Bon shrugged.
Lyra paused, staring back at her cider. “I thought we were only pretending to be friends.”
Bon Bon shrugged again. “No mare should be homeless because they’ve been cheated on.”
Lyra let loose what was becoming a trademark laugh. “You know… I always did think you were a nice mare.”
Bon Bon blinked, then started giggling. “Are you serious?”
“Hmm?”
Shaking her head, Bon Bon played with her mane. “I’m a… I’m not the most pleasant mare, Lyra. Ask anyone I’ve ever dated.” Bon Bon blinked. “Or employed. Or who criticized my food.”
“Pfft. So what? No one’s perfect. I mean, look at me! Have you seen the way I sit on a bench?”
“Yeaaahh…” Bon Bon looked at Lyra sideways. “What… why do you do that?”
“Hmm? Oh, I dunno. It’s actually really comfortable. Though… I wish those kids would stop with the ‘human’ thing.” She shook her head. “It’s rather annoying.”
“What’s a human?”
Lyra waved her hoof, “Who knows, who cares, who do you have to rut to get some service in this bucking bar?”
Berry walked over and without any words, dropped two more mugs on the counter. “On the house. Then get out.”
Looking around the empty bar, Bon Bon arched an eyebrow. “This is a bar, lady.”
Lyra burst out laughing. “She’s got you there, Berry!”
“Yeah yeah yeah. Just drink up and all. That was your last call.”
Bon Bon stared at the wall, squinting. “When did it become two in the morning?”
Lyra whispered loudly, “It’s a conspiracy of soberists.”
Berry groaned. “Just drink already. I wanna get drunk.”
Lyra grinned, staring right at Berry Punch. “Oh, I think I’m gonna savor this one…” And with that Lyra brought the mug to her lips and took a long, slow pull complete with an intentionally loud slurping noise. Lyra bumped her elbow into Bon Bon’s, indicating for her to follow suit. Bon Bon tried, then found herself spitting up cider on the bar, she was laughing too hard.
Then she realized it wasn’t on the bar. It was all over Berry’s face.
“You are both weirdos.” Her stare could turn a unicorn to stone. She turned and walked to the bar door, opening it wide and pointing. “Out.”
They stumbled down the path, laughing like maniacs.
“The look on her face!” Bon Bon giggled. “Oh my goodness, the look on her face!”
“The cider on her face,” Lyra corrected, “was what framed the look.”
“I’ve never done anything like that before!” Bon Bon grinned widely, “I’ve never been this drunk before!”
Lyra was giggling like a school filly. “I know! Ain’t it great! Like my old man use’ta say! Drink for fun! Not for sorrow! Drink for today- there is no tomorrow!”
“Hey.” Bon Bon’s eyes fluttered up and down. “Hey. Hey. That rhymes.”
“Hehe, it does, doesn’t it?” Lyra paused, looking at Bon Bon with a drunkenly critical look. “Y’know… I think, Bon Bon, that this is the start of a beauuuuutiful fri––”
Bon Bon kissed her. Lyra’s eyes went wide. After a moment, Lyra kissed back.
There was not a whisper on the street, not a word. Just the soft sound of lips meeting lips. Finally, they stared at one another, and Bon Bon looked down, blushing.
“I can’t believe this. Not again,” she muttered.
“What?”
Bon Bon mumbled, “Falling for a musician again… my father was right, I never learned.”
Lyra rubbed the back of her neck. “Well… technically, you know…”
“What?”
Lyra muttered something.
Bon Bon leaned closer. “Couldn’t hear you.”
“I’m technically… not a musician… I can’t play any instruments at all.”
Bon Bon gawked. “But… your cutie mark! Your membership in the guild! Your––”
“I’m a lyricist.”
Silence.
“What.”
“Yeah. Uh. I write the songs, but, not the notes. I can’t play an instrument to save my life.”
Bon Bon blinked. Then she laughed.
Lyra laughed.
They kissed again.
And never looked back.
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... and said, "Ow."
4055222
heh.
4055235 read the name of the chapter and then my comment.
4055248
...i would think it was obvious...
4055256 anyways, good story I liked it.
Well, this was a fun little ride^^ Cant really decide who was the best character in this^^ Berry, Bon Bon, Lyra... they were all pretty good^^
Great job^^
For a guy with a (admittedly awesome) gimmick name you write a damn good little story. Followed, faved and upvoted.
Hm, I do like well-written fics that make Lyra something a little more unique than the typical fandom interpretation.
So I like this one.
Nicely done! Cute story
You're a big fanboi of SS&E, aren't you?
Nice story, btw. Bon Bon will never learn.
Well that was cute :)
4057075
what gave it away.
This was pretty good.
Am I correct in assuming Einhander helped with this project?
4057593
Hmmm, je ne sais quoi.
I loved it, this is now my favorite lyraXBonBon fic I have read so far.
One complain though:
I'm not sure why Bon Bon's father would be against her dating a musician if he was a musician himself.
Anyway, I liked Berry's personality a lot,
Good story,
~Leonzilla
4059552
ha! go figure, yeah?
should be fixed in but a moment.
4060099
the father simply said she never learned.
Bon Bon was simply applying that to that particular lesson.
4060292 hmm. Okay I'll buy it; but the way it was said it looked like the two sentences were related even if that wasn't your intention originally.
~Leonzilla
Pretty cool, though one thing tripped me up...
She can't play the Lyre? *blinks* Lol.
Anywho, woot!
Loved it!
that right there was a stupidly enjoyable read. upvote fav and welcome to the now 6 fics i make it a point to reread every month.
This was sweet, but I don't see it ending well. Bonds forged in booze don't always last long out of it.
Still, as the saying went, there is no tomorrow. With the story ended, the lovers' fate could be anything, and so is everything and nothing. Unless someone continues this, they are forever suspended in a perfect, apple-scented moment of love and intoxication.
In any case, thank you for a most enjoyable story.
4060292 why not, "I never learn," rather than "I never learned."
That's a good one. A play on her name and a little twist for the end.
4072182
i, personally, have been considering on making this into something more...
it does have that potential, yeah?
4076569 THIS, good sir, has earned yet ANOTHER like and fave.
This was nice, and really funny. I've always been a sucker for Lyrabon. If you were to - hypothetically, of course - turn this into a longer story, I'd definitely stick around for the ride.
i.somethingawful.com/news/2006/01/30-pratfall.jpg
I enjoyed this a lot.
Why were they angry at each other to begin with?
How could a bar run out of liquor, which is a shelf-stable commodity?
How can Lyra drain an entire mug of carbonated cider that quickly? It's actually pretty impressive.
When will we see the username "kiltsandcollapses" appear?
4107658
we quite enjoyed that addition.
4158873
and i'm glad you enjoyed it. thank you!
4164666
meh. wasn't the focus, really.
Have you guys realized what an absolute coup it is to have a story with 208 upvotes and all of one downvote? That's deeply weird.
And awesome.
Daaawww! Thanks for an awesome, sweet little story =)
i14.photobucket.com/albums/a331/brittmcgee/MLP%20Minecraft/TLSOA_zps2aa17c49.png
4541268
wow... dude, thank you.
4547362
)
No problem! It's a good story. I like that it's not a typical LyraBon/TaviScratch story, especially with how Lyra and Bon Bon aren't just one-dimensional characters. (Seriously, if I see another "Lyra is obsessed with hands/humans" fic, I'll puke.
Anywho, it's a nice, simple one-shot. It tells the story and then it ends before it can overstay its welcome. Can't really complain about that.
And adorably fun. Bravo.
4826067
it was certainly a blast to write, that's for sure!
why is there only 1 fic from you
Nicely done story here. The proper level of drunkenness came across perfectly, and you did a great job capturing the two characters, as well as the beleaguered barkeep. Perfect for a quick, fun read!
5077195
certainly what we went for, chief
thanks!
Mildly irritating (but I guess near-inevitable) "human" reference aside, I really liked this. Nice interplay between the principals, goes along at a cracking pace and actually has an OctaScratch background that doesn't make me want to tear my eyes out. Also, fun.
5670757
human reference? mind explaining?
5681724 Purely personal prejudice on my part! This bit:
I'm not terribly fond of this particular bit of Lyra fanon, that's all. No comment intended on the quality of the writing, just that I didn't particularly like that line.
Man, I totally forgot the lyricist pun at the end.
Well, that happened.
awesome, hilarious and heart warm can't wait to see more from you
I always admire Lyra's optimism. It fills me with determination
. I do have this slight urge for Tavi and Lyra, but VInyl is still most preffered 
. And I expected the candymaker to pass out. She's been there for two hours or so I presume. I guess passing out in the streets was one way to do it 
Can't remember where I learned this line "Makes so much sense it rhymes!"
. And finally, there's just a lot of punatics here 
. But the last oe was really neat. Might want to update your story to comedy. 
PS: Usually more talkative, but I'm using a different laptop atm. Kinda makes me unease ;P
I approve :V