An Exceptional Discovery On The Nature Of Pony Names

by L Pondera

Discovery

He ran like he had never run before, the changelings attempting to scoop him up while simultanuously trying to knock him out. He wasn't going to get far, but far enough he hoped.

"Is that all you've got? I can't outrun a foal, how are you guys this bad?!" He mocked with the last of his breath as he slowed down.

He panted hard as he slowed from a trot to a walk, to a crawl. The changelings surrounded him, still cautious in case he tried something, they inched closer and closer.

"Careful, he might zap you." One warned the others.

"Alter want's this one alive, so don't kill him." Another reminded the others.

He layed there trying to catch his breath, feeling both defeated and victorious. It was an odd sensation, one that led to him being a bit content.

"Geiger!" Scribe shouted as she approached, letting Spyglass take a few pot shots.

"I said go away! You stubborn mare." Geiger cried as his lungs burned with a thousand fires. "I don't want any cookies!"

"Hold on, we'll get you out of there." Scribe shouted as she dodged series of spells fired at her, all but one that is.

It struck dead center in the chest, knocking her over and sending Spyglass sprawling to the ground, her rifle landing with a loud crunch noise like glass being stepped on.

"Too many heroes." The first changeling laughed. "Get rid of them!" He ordered the others.

"Not today!" Geiger coughed.

He reached deep down, for what he knew to be the last time. The echo of a massive explosion sounding off in the distance, reminding him of Vera's battle.

"I'm sorry Vera... Thank you for everything you've given me; For the feelings I now have that let me understand. For the purpose which drives me forward. For the courage to do what I'm about to do. And for the joy that lets me do this, with a smile. My life was lived just to live until that day. Now, I die having truly lived, even if it was just for a moment in time." He shut his eyes and focused the very last of his life into one final spell.

Scribe righted herself and looked at the glowing ball of light that was Geiger, her jaw dropping like that of the changelings. She reached a hoof out for him, she wanted to save him, that's all she wanted right now.

His case file was a small one, no prior crimes or infractions of any kind, save for misuse of a chemistry set in school. She reached out to the pony who had no surviving family, who had no spouse and no friends. She reached out to a scientist who made a single mistake one day. One he claimed he had good reasons for.

She reached out for a pony she once knew, a scientist who made a single mistake. He took a job refining loco weed in Zebrawa. Half zebra, half earth pony, all scientist. He was just trying to make some money so he could get on with his life. It all ended that day in Zebrawa, when the Painter showed up. Using magic that was cast with a flash from his eyes, a magic beam rifle and his bare hooves. The Painter layed waste to the entire operation, all by himself no less. On that day, the pony she loved died in a burning inferno.

Spyglass grabbed Scribe and pulled her down to the ground. She was protecting the only pony she had ever cared about. Her family was a bunch of dirt poor scrappers stuck in Zebra Territory, doing a job that barely payed for food, let alone travel back to Equestria. They all had a sunken soulless way about them, so did she until she met Scribe. They trained for a special narcotics enforcement task force, created in an effort to end the trade of loco weed. If only they had just waited, the Painter would've taken care of it for them.

Then they wouldn't of been in the crossfire, and she wouldn't of gotten her flank beat. The whole time, he smiled, tears streamed down his cheeks as he smiled, the fire and chaos reflected in his mirror shades. Her own face, contorted with fear as she fought to break free of his grip. Her squadmates lay strewn about, injured, as if they were of no consequence at all.

Spyglass held tight to the only pony she'd ever love, protecting her like she failed to do for her squad. Just as Scribe reached out to save a scientist she had failed to save.

In a blinding flash, Geiger released his aura in a solid wall of charged magic, the force of it knocked away the changelings with the same shooting star blast he had used earlier. And then, he collapsed into a heap in the center of a blackened dent his spell had left behind.

Vera stood over a crumpled clone of herself, bug juice leaking everywhere from the creature before her. She was certainly tired now, but she always had enough strength to see it through. She held in her hooves the gem, freshly pried from the necklace. She craddled it inbetween her forehooves.

Such a familiar artifact, not unlike the ones her family kept. They belonged to the most prolific pony in all her home land's history. The Great Black, Lord Caelestis Niger, Lord Black Sky himself. Her and her cousin's ancestor and reason for coming to Equestria. The land he was said to have disappeared in.

"He was very good with botany and minerology you know. He made gems like these to power the Titans. This was meant to protect his neglected children and spouses, not some foolish creature." She eyed Alter as his life slipped away.

"You'll always be our queen..." He breathed as his form returned to normal.

"I'm sorry. I did warn you once, power corrupts what it cannot destroy, which is why no one should have so much of it. I'm not perfect you know, far from it." She softly told Alter.

She crushed the gem between her hooves, it's magical power vanishing in a vapor, the fragments landing unceremoniously on the ground.

"Mistress." Alter sighed with his last breath.

She felt a stabbing pang of sorrow for Alter, he only wanted to protect the hive, forever. Too bad, he hadn't relised that mortality was a vital part of life.

She looked over her shoulder at the flash of light that was Geiger's last stand. She felt her heart drop, yet, she had already accepted his fate the moment she saw his graying mane. Today wasn't a good day, sorry Ice Pony... She rushed over, already working through her grief.

Scribe looked at the pathetic form that had once been a proud pony, and she howled. Her tears weren't solely for Geiger, but for her former love. It took another scientist dying before her before she could cry them. It was now Spyglass' turn to console Scribe. She held on as tightly as she could, knowing full well, there was nothing they could do.

Vera landed nearby, looking down into the divot Geiger rested in. His face still bore a smile on it, one that had a curious effect on her. She could feel the peace he felt, see the determination in his lifeless dull half-lidded eyes as it stained them forever. She could taste the bittersweet air of acceptence. Had if not been his last expression, she would've enjoyed it. As it was, it gave her some closure to know it was his choice, and his alone.

"Let it all out, that's a girl. He finally found his answers, and finished his quest." Vera spoke to Scribe as she surveyed the area.

It was full of scattered bushes and a few narrow trunked trees. Not far from the canal that seperated Equestria from Zebra Territories. Temptingly close, but, still so far. It was a nice spot, as good as any. She reached into her saddle bags and pulled out a folding shovel.

"I promised you a quiet grave, somewhere. Rest in that blissful peace Doctor, you've earned it." She offered to his remains.

She then began to bury him, no need to check vitals when you knew death on a personal and professional basis. She could hear no heartbeat and sense no life, she saw that spell with her own eyes, there was no doubt.

"How curious, although a bit disappointing." Mr. Pewter said from his lawn chair.

He lowered his binoculors and clicked his tongue. What an end for the scientist. The Treasury didn't need the money, it was just the principle of the matter. He hated having to be the bad guy. If he didn't though, the Treasury would be broke and the government would be rediculed for being soft. So, he was cold and logical, to the point of actual ice in his words.

Windago's kiss, that was his special ability. How he got it, he prefered not to say. He only wanted to do his job, keep his country financially secure and respected. Had he known this is what Magic Geiger had discovered, he would've been forced to hand it over to higher powers, where it would have ended up being used for something dangerous. It might even have fallen to Twilight of Starlight Glimmer to fiddle with, and judging by the end result, they would've died like Geiger had.

"Good show sir, you have done it. If I had to say, I'd wager you would've made it well out of Equestria. Damn shame you didn't." He checked his watch.

"Miss Ripple!" He shouted to his secretary, hiding under her umbrella.

"Yes sir?" She responded with a shiver.

"Take this down. On the debt of one Mr. Magic Geiger... Payed in Full." He scowled as he checked his watch again.

"Back to work then."

As the last stone was placed over the mound of dirt, Vera breathed a sigh of relief. Scribe stood there, her face puffy from tears. Vera had already spoken her peace, and had much more important things to attend to, she had a date at the castle of the two sisters. She gave Scribe and Spyglass a nod before she took off flying.

"I suck..." Scribe broke the silence.

"Don't say that." Spyglass snapped. "If I hadn't lost my cool..." She trailed off.

"I guess we suck." Scribe said with a faint trace of a smile.

"Then let's suck together, back where we belong." Spyglass suggested.

"Equestria was a bad idea... Let's... Let's go home then." She struggled.

"So long as you're around, it won't be boring." Spyglass offered, blushing a little.

"Let's do it then." She nodded to Spyglass. "Goodbye Doctor." She added as she walked off towards Zebrawa's general direction.

Spyglass jammed the barrel of her magic rifle into the dirt next to Geiger's grave, she wouldn't need it anymore. That and, it was quite broken, much like her desire for revenge and fear. She gave his grave a salute and chased off after the only thing she had left in this world, Scribe.

Stop looking for a happy ending, this isn't an Equestrian story, it's a Matavitan story, there are no happy ending there. Only the satisfactory, the acceptable and the bittersweet. For, the moment he learned of it, he was doomed by it's power. Arcanian Science is a very closely guarded art of magic for this very reason. Such power has a price, and should never be wielded by those unprepared. It doesn't just cost the very vitality of the caster, but the moral judgement of it's user. As The Painter used it to his ends, so too did Vera and Geiger.

To what end does this leave us, what moral has been imparted? There is no lesson you "should" take from this, only the one you "do" take. Whatever that might be.

Comments

[Starlight Nova]

What's the death tag for?

[L Pondera]

8931753
The End

[tkepner]

The story was good, the execution. . . not so much. The lame transitions between scenes. (Seriously, when was the last time you saw a movie or TV show that flashed a "Meanwhile...." on the screen between scenes separated by geography? There's a reason for that! It's because they are TERRIBLE!) And unlike the movies, you can start a scene by stating where the character is or having the character say something that explains it. Even just putting a LINE between the scenes is sufficient for modern readers.

And there's a reason why every chapter in edit mode has a secondary area after it listed "AUTHOR NOTES." You should really learn to use it.

[L Pondera]

8932290
The point of them is that there is no point. Yeah, they pull you back, yeah they are distracting and do nothing for the story. That's the pointlessness of them. I shoved that random tag there for a reason. The one shot went nuclear when the moderator who first reviewed it felt it wasn't MLP: FIM enough, and I don't blame them. It was my first publication. So, out of nothing but the first chapter, which ended with Geiger sending the report, I had to do all of this.

Yeah, I should've taken it more serious, but I felt the needless urge to give it the confusing transitions set by an incompetent narrator, me. It's out of the blue game breaking moments to remind you, it's just a game. With all the fics out there pandering and taking themselves so damn seriously, or just being written to see how long they go, I sat down and let this evolve itself. Naturally, it's messy in places, and I knew it would be.

So that is why I made dumb transitions for cheap laughs, not laziness, maybe to cover up bad writting, but mostly that other stuff. Thus, rant for a rant, I address your intense desire to call me an awful author, an idiot and generally bad at life. If you were trying to be a critique, it's best not be insulting at every possible turn. Someone would be more willing to hear you out that way.

I wrote this to share some head canon, and for myself. Everything I write, is for me. If someone else enjoys it, good, if not, have a nice time somewhere else. I have my disappointments, who doesn't with their first child? But it's too late to abort, and no use trying to change it. It was written poorly as a joke is some places, yet the end is so out of character for what could pass as a shit post. Let the shrugging commence, intensify, then die.

- Love
The Awful Terrible Moronic Author L.P

[tkepner]

8932608
Rants have their place.

The problem is that the story started out serious. If you had started with the "incompetent narrator" as you termed it, or "comedic intent", then it wouldn't have been such a shock to run into those things five chapters into what seemed like a serious story (with spots of humor).

For your first story, the story itself was well written. Removing the "narrator" interruptions would not impact the story itself beyond making it flow better.

I suppose I interpret random differently than you. To me, random doesn't mean the author's writing is random and distracting, but that the events written are not necessarily in any given order, that the scenes are not necessarily going to follow one another in logical manner, or that the following scene might not necessarily follow the action sequence or subjects of the previous scene.

And not MLP:FIM enough? Really? What a twit that critic was. The only requirements for a story on FIMFiction are that you must be one Equestria or involve a character from the series in the first chapter. Your first chapter certainly meets the requirement of being on Equestria!

[L Pondera]

8932878
I suppose I should've added a comedy tag, but that isn't entirely the case. As for removing the narrator, while it would be a simple matter, I don't feel like it. Sorry, but it's some absurdity I have, a flavor I add to my stories on occasion. Like a fourth wall break from the show. I know you don't like how it interrupts, and I am most certain others will feel the same, but it's sadly going to stay.

I have been writing short stories since I was ten, and I've always found a spot to accommodate an absurdity of some sort. Only with my most serious writting do I avoid it. For this story, I feel now, having completed it, like it could be far more serious.

But, I also feel like the current flow in some way matches Geiger's developement. How it's a bit silly at the start, then get's crossed with a mixture as he goes about getting his flank kicked, maybe the narrator plays into being knocked silly or having tapped into such magic. I feel the story grows with Geiger, though it never fully matures, just like he didn't.

Or it's all complete crap. As it says in the end, what you take from it is what matters. If you've learned I'm stubborn and make bad choices, you certainly wouldn't be wrong, just not entirely right.

In any event, thanks for reading it, you called me on my BS and pointless attempt to humor the reader. And you didn't down vote, so that's also appreciated. Have a good time, and live the dream, whatever that might be.