• Member Since 21st Feb, 2012
  • offline last seen Jun 19th, 2012

Zystral


E

A hasty summons from her parents ushers Twilight home, bringing with her the entire group. Everything about the situation already seems strange - her parents don't usually write, they never send magic letters, and the tone of the letter is dark and sombre. Arriving in Canterlot, not much seems out of place until her parents mention the reason she has been brought back. A reason she had forgotten for a while, and one that would strike her harder than any sword: the passing of her distant brother.

Staggershocked by the news of his death, Twilight struggles to escape the pit of sadness she digs for herself as she reminisces on fond memories, both of the past, and in the case of the present - a lack of. It slowly dawns upon her that he was indeed her brother - a fact she had long since forgotten. However, as she falls even deeper into despair at the loss of someone so close yet so far, a light shines out from the darkest of corners. A light blue and cold, yet sharp and brilliant.



It's been quite the while since I last stretched my eloquence muscles... I really enjoy narrative-based prose like this. So much fun to write and direct, as if the words were clay before your very hands. If anybody is wondering, yes, I have gone through a similar scenario. While not as close as a sibling, it was still enough to shake me to my core. I tried to recall my own emotions and experiences as much as I could for Twilight. I hope you enjoy my insight.


Standard copyright stuff; MLP:FiM, characters and settings all (C) Hasbro and Lauren Faust, original characters (C) me, cover image from:

Chapters (4)
Comments ( 4 )

348476
Thanks a million for your comments.
Yeah, I know it's dialogue heavy, but I think that dialogue-drivens story is the way to go. Rather than saying "then they did this then they did that then they did that again", using the characters themselves to give more of an insight into various aspects that would normally go undefined is an exploration I really enjoy.

Formatting isn't my strong point, but I think the oddities come from the fact that being a traditionalist, British writer, I was taught that all opening dialogue should begin on a new line. I've seen that convention broken, but it bothers me greatly. As for paragraph breaks, I don't even know myself...

But I'm glad you enjoyed it! I'll see what I can do about forthcoming chapters in regards to shape, visualization, and prose:dialogue ratios. Thanks again!

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