Daring Do is underway in another big tale! The legendary artifact is in her hooves, and her enemies are right on her tail!
But then everything changes. Things are wrong, but... in all the right ways?
What happens when an action hero finds a peaceful rest stop outside their story?
(Season 4, sometime after Daring Don't, Some innuendo humor)
Random Romance - December 2013, FluttershyXDaringDo
Cover art by the talented Novel-Idea using the resources below.
MLP Resource: Unfurled scroll
byZuTheSkunk
Resource: open book by dervonnebenaan
Through the looking glass
byJackOfMostTrades
Chapters (14)
Okay, so there are a few similarities I'm seeing between my story and yours. An entirely different delivery, though, and I've yet to discover the big theme that dominated mine.
I'm very interested to see where this is going.
I'll take this opportunity to point out that you write Discord waaaaaay better than me.
Humor and silliness are not my strong points.
3746443 To be fair, from other characterizations I've seen, I may write him too far into the 'Friendly' end of the spectrum. I think Discord is one of those hard to pin down characters simply because what little we see of the interactions tend to be Fluttershy putting her hoof down and Discord enjoying chaos (Or grudgingly undoing it).
In short,
when you write the Discord, the Discord writes about you.
...
No, wait, I screwed that quote up.
3746522
Actually, was referring to the chaos part, where things just happen all silly like. The personality is dependent upon headcanon, but the thing that really makes Discord Discord is the zany stuff that always happens in his presence.
And I have a lot of trouble with that.
Anyway, I finally finished this (in the midst of my busy work schedule
). All in all, it was a pretty great read. You definitely get points for originality in the form of Edward, and the final solution was anything but expected. I have a few nitpicks and more than one red flag, but compared to most of the stories I end up reading on this site this story gets high marks.
In comparison to my own, it was a longer road and turned in an entirely different direction. This one felt like an action adventure, while mine was a bit slower. Not to mention yours had a happy ending and mine was...bittersweet. But this is all good news! Our stories don't mirror one another, so it gives the voters more to think on for each of us. And that includes you: don't forget to vote!
I think I'll put this in my favorites list. I never add to that thing.
3750213
I... thank you!
As far as Discord, well, I think a steady diet of Looney Tunes when I was a child was a contributing factor.
I hope Edward's pun didn't cause too much agony.
As far as the nitpicks and red flags, please send me them in PM if you don't want to dump them publicly! The only way I'll improve is by patching my leaks.
(Do you think I should add 'Adventure' back to the categories? I took it out because it was only over the course of a few days. Hardly a grand adventure)
And yes, I was... surprised by how bittersweet the emotions seemed to be for this contest. I'm a hopeless romantic. I like happy endings and sweetness. Of course, that doesn't mean the journey doesn't hurt, but I think I have a harder time staying 'dark' or sad.
3778400 Hey, I appreciate the fact that you give me a reason for the thumbs down. Thanks!
OK... well, a definite thumbs up from me. Since you won the contest, I get the privilege of reviewing your story, so you'll be able to read it in a week or so.
3814518 I already quake in fear.
I appreciate your thumbs up, but your fellow reviewer seems like he may not enjoy this type of story too much.
Ah well, I should really focus on this month's story entry.
Yeah. Focus. How's that work again? 
Eh, it's not like the reader were following along this ride for a big boss fight at the end. I'm sure our heroes will get over this hurdle in another chapter or two.
4875760 Thanks for the feedback. The more I look at it the more blatant it becomes that I was trying to write an action movie with a soft chewy romance center.
At least it gives me a decent set-up for a sequel.
Huh. Is Fluttershy going to be split in two as well or just AK/Daring? Only one way to find out.
4983524
Ah, no, you fool, what are you doing?! My stories stink! Go read something a bit better written and more entertaining!
Daring, you're thinking about it wrong. If Fluttershy's an assassin and looks that harmless, she's very good. It's a better bet she's not one, though.
Good to see the plot- contrivance artifact of the week can't entirely railroad Discord. That would be pretty silly.
Little mistake here. Full of energy would be energized. Enervated means drained of energy.
It's little things like this that really help establish Daring as a character.
You know this has me really curious now. Daring didn't express any shock at all meeting Twilight, even though she's an alicorn. Does Daring already know about her world's Twilight or are alicorns just more common there (it is ficition)?
Throwing a Jumanji crossover in would normally be a bit distracting but this fic handled it pretty well.
... Of course it's a gryphon, that explains why they were guarding the artifact... though given how it works I would have expected them to be handing it out to passers-by.
Huh, you'd think gryphon guards would be easier than a giant maze (if less useful). Maybe living things are just harder?
Well, that's an interesting question. She has been eating real food. So was she converting that to 'words and magic' or converting bits of herself to flesh and blood? If the latter, she just needs to eat enough.
Good crack pairing. Definitely not one I would have thought of and the action/weird magic stuff managed to make it more interesting than it would have been if it was just romance, I think.
I found this looking for crack Fluttershy pairings but I got a decent action/adventure tale as well. Now if only I could find Fluttershy/Nightmare Moon. Don't judge me...I was mostly inspired by a couple fics where Fluttershy basically lectures Nightmare Moon into giving up on eternal night. (mostly No Need for Rainbows, A Minor Variation, and the second half of Random Elements, the sequel Coincidences Can Happen). Sadly, no such crack fics seem to exist.
4987966 I am pleasantly surprised I didn't horrify you or destroy your faith in your fellow author. I didn't... try to make it a crack ship, but I guess it is somewhat forced, isn't it? Ah well, random romance is random... I really need to get back into contributing to the contests.
I'm glad you (seem to have) enjoyed it!
...Nightmare moon and Fluttershy, huh? ....Depends on if Nightmare Moon is the 'nightmare possessing Luna' or the 'evil Luna' I suppose. Hm. I shall ponder this.
...Probably after at least ONE of these Trixie fics I'm trying to write.
4989034
I'd call this... Good but not great. There's nothing really wrong with it, despite what you might say, it just doesn't have that spark that would make it a stand out piece. You do a good Discord, you sold the fairly random pairing enough that it didn't feel random, just slightly rushed, you had an interesting villain and magic puzzle set-up. It's a thumbs up but not favorite piece, I think.
Wow, if you do take me up on my off-hand comment that would be a pleasant surprise on my part. (I suspect evil Luna would be easier but that's just a suspicion, whatever works).
4989705 I appreciate the honesty. And.. well, this was as you say, not something I'd consider too standout. It was.. good, but I feel like it could be better. Much bettter. Then again, if I didn't feel that way, writing would be so much easier.
You can has review!
6810033 No! NOOOOOOOOO!
Good to see you again, although I am sad the group is defunct. Then again, my writing speed at the moment is 'glacial' so...
You got Rarity'd, that's what happened.
If you find it within yourself to write a sequel, then "double dare" or "double Daring" needs to make its way in. Possibly as a chapter title.
I did kind of wonder why the author didn't decide to go by whatever A.K. stands for. But I guess the narration of that last experiment wouldn't have worked.
Speaking of, if Daring was composed of everything Yearling wrote about her, I have to wonder: did fanfiction have any effect? And can Yearling keep affecting her? The latter, at least, can be tested: she just has to write that Daring gets a strange taste in her mouth for a moment.
One more thing: I think you may have missed an opportunity for Rarity to say, "Daring, darling!" (I'm pretty sure she hasn't said it in the show either.)
Oh my god, it's gonna be Jumanji, isn't it?
Yeah, it's Jumanji.
Yeah, I didn't even need the confirmation. Though it's still nice to get it. As for the game, itself?
An elephant gun...against a rabbit⁉ If the hunter were to actually hit him, there'd be so little left over, how could she even tell? Also, I never thought about it--why would I?--but I'm not really surprised Fluttershy can negate so many of the dangers in the game. Plus, Daring actually enjoyed the game. Should've seen that coming, but I didn't think about it. Finally, it's pretty funny that Angel managed to pull a Bugs Bunny, and turn the tables on the hunter.
All in all, this chapter definitely earned a thumbs-up.
Fluttershy, no! Don't fall for an extra-dimensional copy! Or whatever this Daring is. I'm actually leaning more towards a golem-type thing, like the griffons in the temple. But either way, it can only end in heartbreak.
I meant to put this in last chapter's comment, but forgot to before I hit the post button. And now it's too late. Poor Flutters.
Discorded Fluttershy? I did not see that coming. But I liked it. Nice twist.
Dang, book money. Daring Do's cashed in enough off writing to have a personal hayfrying machine at home.
yay