You seem to have javascript disabled, or your browser is failing to execute it properly. Much of Fimfiction's functionality requires javascript so we suggest you turn it on!

Nothing like a hot bath

Source

With help from Sorin, Spitfire finds time to relax after a long hard few weeks

Chapters (1)

Comments ( 2 )

Viewing 1 - 50 of 2
- Newest First
- Oldest First

The Main Man

The Main Man #1 · Dec 4th, 2013 · · ·

I hope you don't mind a little constructive criticism. I noticed a lot of run on sentences, as well as many places where commas were needed and a few misspellings. There was another part where two words were combined, somewhat, but I got what you meant:

Spitfire pulled the book that was under her wing and placed it inferno of her, she then grabbed her cup and took a sip of the hot liquids, the honey coated her sore throat and the warmth soothed her.

should be:

Spitfire pulled the book that was under her wing and placed it in front of her. She then grabbed her cup and took a sip of the hot liquids, the honey coating her sore throat and the warmth soothing her.

Or something like that. Semicolons might be better there. It's more your preference, really.

CyanShadows

CyanShadows #2 · Dec 5th, 2013 · · ·

eh... Im sorta sucking when it comes to writing. see, my school Never taught us spelling and writeing also..my english isent that great. So thank you so much for the help