• Member Since 14th Jul, 2013
  • offline last seen Jun 8th, 2014

The Warner Brothers


Comments ( 5 )

Well, I know someone would eventually write something like this. We all knew Fluttershy's psyche was a bit weak and that she might have done something along these lines. What intrigues me is how? Does she do it out of spite? Out of the fact that her and Rainbow's relationship may never work out because of society's iron punch?

I guess I'll never know until I read more. You've got me entangled. Keep it up.

~Literary Luna

ends a tad abruptly but is definitely worth a fav and a follow.
if i might make one suggestion however try not to use every day words like pissed, you might try scowled or glared just as an example. have fun writing hope to see more soon. :pinkiesmile:

okay, I have to tell you this one juicy little tidbit:

Not to be mean or anything, but the overall format of this story sucks. Again, I'm not being mean, but it does. Just hear (well... read, really) me out...

!. you should never start a paragraph with the "~" symbol. You should always use the "Tab" key.

2. there should be new paragraphs whenever you even slightly change the topic.


I have some time, so if you want I could edit this story for you. I am a very fine editor, and help out anyone who truly needs it. And, to tell the truth... you kinda do.

Please get back to me via PM.

From,
Your friendly neighborhood RTPOA

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