Wonders
By Dancing With Discord
Dear Wonderbolts
Dear Wonderbolts
Hello my name is Scootaloo; I am an orange Pegasus with a magenta mane and purple eyes. I am here to tell you about my life. I was born in Manehatten, I was raised in a small orphanage in Canterlot after the Manehatten orphanage got full. I was dropped off where I spent over five years wishing of parents. One day I got my wish, I finally was adopted by two lovely ponies, one named Ruby the other Gem, and both were exceptionally well mannered and polite. However when I got to their house Gem my adoptive father stopped me, and said these words exactly. "Alright, now that you know where we live, here are our rules, you are to go to school, come back home do your homework, eat dinner, and sleep, that's it," It wasn't that easy though. I came home at 3:50 and Gem ran up to me, he questioned me. Where was I? Why did I come home so late, did I get in trouble? All those questions were asked by my adoptive father. When I struggled to tell him that I was put in detention he hit me. He then proceeded to put me on his lap and told me. "You hit your face on a door got it?" he asked scaring me.
Me well, I simply nodded I had a hard time speaking to this stallion. He was so kind to me one moment, and then he got worse and worse. His hits got harder and harder. He scared me, my adoptive mother however, made him look like bucking marry pony, she forced me to do the dishes every night no matter how late, or how early, she would call me sometimes. "Scootaloo get in here!" she would call. Every time I walk down she hands me a scrub brush. I even do the cooking 364 days a year, they forget my birthday, and sometimes they even just called me "you." After two years of abuse I finally built up the courage to run away. A few times I was caught by Ruby and Gem. One day, I wasn't caught by them I just kept running and running.
Finally after a week of non-stop running I finally felt my legs give out at the doorstep of a Canterlot house. A young stallion took me inside and nursed me back to health. As soon as I felt my vocal cords work again he asked me some questions. "What's your name, Why are you all alone, what happened to you?" he gave me no time to answer. Finally I got time to answer. "M...My name is Scootaloo, I ran away from my adoptive abusive parents, and I ran non-stop," I told the stallion.
He nodded. "Well, my name is Jet Set, and this is Upper Crust," the stallion introduced. The mare offered shelter for the night. I quickly agreed. Later that night, I woke up in the middle of the night I overhead the stallion and mare arguing. "Look, I don't care that filly needs to stay for a while let's just let her stay a week," Upper Crust demanded.
The stallion shook his head in disagreement. "No, we are not having some random foal stay with us!" he raised his voice.
He was hushed by Upper Crust. "Shh you don't want to wake up Scootaloo do you?" she hissed.
Jet Set laughed. "Now that you mention it yes!" he said ignoring his wife Upper Crust hushing him.
"Look, let's just let her sleep the night, then we'll have a talk, alright?" she asked.
Jet Set nodded in doubtful agreement. "Fine," he groaned.
My heart was broken. I felt it snap. I thought I found a family that actually loved me though I didn't. So that night as soon as I got into my bedroom I climbed out the window and kept running. It was a long and tradable journey. I was later stopped by a sharp pain in my hooves something felt off about them. Some-pony walked up and asked "What's wrong little?" was the butter yellow Pegasus' words. I got up and fell over again I rolled on my side to my shook my front hoof was bleeding. "O...Oh my," the Pegasus picked me up and placed me on her couch. "You relax, I'll be right back," she left the room. This was when I met up with some unwanted ponies. "Well, there you are," a recognizable voice called out.
"Oh, you must be this poor filly's parents, I'll let you take care of her," the Pegasus smiled.
Ruby used her magic and levitated me off the couch and onto her shoulder she acted nice. When we were on the train back to Manehatten on came the on slot. "What were you doing, you know should feel lucky we don't throw you off this train!" he snapped.
I muttered to myself in anger. "What's stopping you?" I muttered.
I was shocked with his response "you're right," he lifted me off the ground and tossed me off the moving train. I tumbled to the ground. I was lucky to just have sprung my ankle. I was scared around this new town of Ponyville.
Sincerely, Scootaloo
A month later.
Spitfire sat at her desk. She glanced at Soarin. "How many more?" she asked.
He looked around the piles of letters. "Well looks like just one, by a filly named Scootaloo," Soarin told Spitfire who hastily grabbed the letter to get it over with. She looked over the letter; she felt a tear form in the corner of her eye. "This poor filly wins," Spitfire declared.
Soarin nodded. "This was from Ponyville," he looked at Spitfire who was silently sniffing she wiped a few tears away from her eyes. She opened her eyes. "Let's for her sake deliver the letter by hand,” Spitfire sniffed.
Soarin tilted his head. "Can I ask why?" he asked.
Spitfire sighed. "It's personal," she said.
Spitfire and Soarin landed on the ground. Of course Rainbow Dash was attracted to that. Scootaloo followed her. "Hello, I am looking for a filly named Scootaloo," she called out. Scootaloo's eyes widened.
"Here!" she yelled flapping her weak wings to get her off the ground.
"C'mon, take these notes," she said.
Scootaloo cocked her head. "Notes, I thought there was only one note," Scootaloo said as she took the first one. It said. "Congratulations you win" it read. Scootaloo took the other one.
This one read something more personal. "Dear Scootaloo, I wish the best of luck with your new mother, Spitfire," Scootaloo slowly looked up at her. Spitfire ruffled her mane. "Yep, that's right, I'm your mother now," Spitfire slowed her pace down. "Look let me explain. You see when I was about your age, I was an orphan too, I had abusive parents, I even had ideas of killing myself, but that was before I given flying another try around Canterlot I was noticed by Celestia and was hired. So I know how you feel," Spitfire looked at all the shocked faces. She chucked. "And, I am also moving here," she called out.
You have my upmost interest.
My heart exploded.
This touched my heart... it takes alot to do that so I congratulate you!!! Keep up the beautiful work!! And yes tears were shed this day...
Look at the ad I tring to make this not happen
Needs some clean up and slow down the flow just a tad [reading felt rushed especially towards the end (unless this was meant more as a prologue)]
Otherwise: the concept is cute and would follow this idea
Not the first time I've seen that Spits was Scoots mother (and probably won't be the last) but this was definitely unique. Rather depressing life poor Scootaloo has.
This story has a lot of potential. Scootaloo's story seems very well thought out and tugs at my heart. But at the same time. The story seemed very rushed. Especially the ending where spitfire adopts scoots. If this story is going to have more chapters I think that that should have waited for a little while. Just seemed so sudden. There was no time for spitfire to get to know scoots and vise versa. I feel that scootaloo would be very apprehensive about joining another family because of past experiences laid out by her in her letter to the wonderbolts. Also there is no timeframe for when this story is taking place. Had she just gotten to ponyville? Or has she been there for several months or longer? Is RD her unofficial sister now or has that not happened yet? Or does that not happen in this universe? How much will be canon? Would love to see this story re-written and lengthened with a lot more details. It has a lot of potential.
I thought is was great quick but great
Huh. Well. That was certainly disappointing. I saw that this was a sad Scootaloo story with a slice of life tag and expected something adorably sad that makes you clench your heart. Instead I just got bored hammering words into my eyes that somewhat resembled a story.
This was waaaaaaaaaaaaay too short. You explained nearly nothing, only giving us a blanket "she's doing X because Y" reason, and dump a container of sad on it and say "HERE IS MY STORY!"
I could give you a more in-depth review, but I'm not really sure if it's worth it.
(That is a self-centered way to invite someone to prove that it is.)
2932637 bakecooklove.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/bcl-img_3022.jpg
Why do I imagine Scootaloo smiling as she writes this? Like "My life isn't too bad."
Scootabuse is Scootalove, don't forget that. I look forward to how Spitfire handles a kid like , and the ups and downs Scootaloo goes through learning to trust Spitfire. Remember the last two time she thought she found a loving family? It's not going to be easy for her.
Her letter was well written but like others said, the ending goes far too fast. I wanna make a certain Rainbow Dash joke but...
2933195 I don't get it. Is there a reference I don't understand? Haha.
2932621 This was a prologue
So what did everyone think of me slipping a nice side to Upper Crest?
2935120 What?
that was so sad i cant believe this made me cry
Isn't it Upper Crust?
2936106 Oops. I'll fix that real quick.
Spitfire as a mother just doesn't...... feel right.
Even if it was with another foal, Spitfire just doesn't seem ready or have what it takes to be a mother, especially how she treats the other Wonderbolts.
At the end it seemed rushed.
However i can´t wait to see Spitfire being Scoot´s mom. I always enjoy new Concepts
2935259 I don't really believe. Sorry.
The ending was a bit rushed, but so far so good.
2935122
The feels. This is starting beautifully.
Ok... that happened a bit too fast.
This should have been a lot longer.
It could easy be fleshed out to maybe two or three chapters.
One chapter for the letter
One for the reaction
One for the adoption
Wow... that was rushed. I was really liking it, but you really jumped the gun towards the end there
that happened fast