Story is written weirdly in my opinion, will not lie, but it's still a good story, just a little hard for me to read, though noticed a few grammatical errors, mainly with quotation marks
*reads chapter 2* "The awkwardness is strong with this one..." Also you have alot of minor grammar mistakes, like putting an end quote (") at the end of dialogue or not putting any at all when it is ( I think) needed. Also I find it fine they are shouting for all caps but don't put triple exclamation points (!!!) all the time. When they are yelling and asking a question at the same time just put one of each (ex:What?!) That's all I have so far, otherwise nice story!
This chapter had me cracking up and I'm happy they meet all the main six.I hope that they both make herds. I can't wait to see what happens between them all next and what happens to them all next.
I know how life works now..... If you wake up in a strange world surrounded by Anthro pony people just start staring (and on occasion touching) their boobs and guess their size........ My life.
I noticed that you have not given credit to the artist shepherd0821 on Deviant Art. Be sure to link stuff out, his artwork is amazing.
And since I'm here, I may give your story a try.
Great story so far please continue it PLEASE !!!!
2872424 8 sure no problem
2872991 thanks for the info I'll correct that soon
Story is written weirdly in my opinion, will not lie, but it's still a good story, just a little hard for me to read, though noticed a few grammatical errors, mainly with quotation marks
I like the story, fix a couple grammar mistkaes here and their and youll be fine!
Update please !!!!!!
*reads chapter 2*
"The awkwardness is strong with this one..."
Also you have alot of minor grammar mistakes, like putting an end quote (") at the end of dialogue or not putting any at all when it is ( I think) needed. Also I find it fine they are shouting for all caps but don't put triple exclamation points (!!!) all the time. When they are yelling and asking a question at the same time just put one of each (ex:What?!) That's all I have so far, otherwise nice story!
This chapter had me cracking up and I'm happy they meet all the main six.I hope that they both make herds. I can't wait to see what happens between them all next and what happens to them all next.
More realistic reaction to being stuck in a new world than most stories I've read where that happened and I'm talking more than just MLP stories
I know how life works now..... If you wake up in a strange world surrounded by Anthro pony people just start staring (and on occasion touching) their boobs and guess their size........
My life.