Gilda was a pretty interesting character, never was exactly a villain. She was just mean but has the potential to be redeemed. It'll be funny to see fluttershy's reaction to seeing her again.
For a first fic it's a great start, good imagery, an understanding of the characters and interesting to read. This story has potential, I'm not sure how long this will be but it will be cool to see how things will progress.
Could be a lot worse my friend, not a bad start at all. I would suggest separating the paragraphs into smaller ones though, it can be annoying to go through a wall of text no matter how good the writing is.
I'm glad you enjoy the first chapter. Its good to see that I won't have to wait like months before I get replies lol. I'll get the next chapter up as soon as possible.
I realized this after some editing and looking at other people's stories. Its just kinda hard to think of when to break off into the next paragraph. I'll work on it as the story goes along and thanks for the feedback.
hope this is gildashy
2704141
hehe, thats exactly what this is. A Gildashy fic. This couple caught my interest and here it is. I hope you enjoy it.
2704141 Yes gildashy the best shipping ever with twixie, rainbowjack, sparity, octiscratch, and scootabloom.
Gilda was a pretty interesting character, never was exactly a villain. She was just mean but has the potential to be redeemed. It'll be funny to see fluttershy's reaction to seeing her again.
For a first fic it's a great start, good imagery, an understanding of the characters and interesting to read. This story has potential, I'm not sure how long this will be but it will be cool to see how things will progress.
Could be a lot worse my friend, not a bad start at all. I would suggest separating the paragraphs into smaller ones though, it can be annoying to go through a wall of text no matter how good the writing is.
Keep at it!
2705553
I'm glad you enjoy the first chapter. Its good to see that I won't have to wait like months before I get replies lol. I'll get the next chapter up as soon as possible.
2707041
I realized this after some editing and looking at other people's stories. Its just kinda hard to think of when to break off into the next paragraph. I'll work on it as the story goes along and thanks for the feedback.
2707112
A good way to do it is to do it by dialogue. One person talks and that's either the beginning or the of a paragraph.
Just go with what feels natural I guess, anyway experience will help.