Intro
Rarity,
I regret to inform you that I want to cancel that order, you see, I had to cancel the photo shoot due to the models all refusing to wear vintage fashion like I had wanted and my bosses frowned upon this... So I now have to move on with the current fashion that is 'in'... I know that we are very close contacts and I was really hoping of getting us both out of this mess, but sadly I have to try another approach... I hope you are able to find work soon, again I truly am sorry about canceling the order...
-Your Companion in fashion,
Glittershot
Great, her last chance was just thrown out of the window... Now she would have to find yet ANOTHER way to earn the bits to keep the bills paid. This was the WORST. POSSIBLE. THING. She had a pile of bills that needed to be paid and that wasn't counting the ones that she already paid... At that moment Sweetie Belle had came into her office.
"Sis? Is everything alright?" She asked.
Rarity sighed, remembering that Sweetie Belle had been helping her organizing what little money they had in order to try to keep the place they called home, she almost wanted to lie to her... but no, she had to know the truth.
"No dear... The client I had was forced to cancel her order and photo shoot... so now I have no work..." replied the seamstress.
Sweetie Belle had understood that if they didn't get the money soon, they would have to sell all that they had in order to pay all of their debts and file bankruptcy; then they would live out on they streets. Seeing her sister like this was saddening, Rarity wanted to have every pony admire all of her passion-filled work and hard-earn fame... But now she was too "out-of-date" for any modeling mare to want to even be seen in anything that she made. All the bills had to be paid in two days to make it worst... Sweetie Belle knew that they would be packing the few things they couldn't live without and sell the rest and find either new work or live on the streets... which would mean that Sweetie Belle would go to a foster home if the latter came to be since their parents had passed away due to a illness earlier in past few years.
"Should I start packing our bags?" Asked the little crusader.
Rarity looked at Sweetie Bell with some regret.
"That... would be best dearie..." Answered Rarity.
She didn't want to give up... but there was no possible way for them to come up with the money to save their home in time... so she had to face the music and try to look for a place that would take them in while she found a new job... She figured that her friends might know of some things that could work... But she had to find work so that she and Sweetie Belle could stay together... After all... they were the only family either of them had...
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Applejack had gotten a letter from Rarity and was very excited. She had developed a crush for the unicorn over the years and was starting to have daydreams about her while working on the fields... which sure enough, led to a very annoyed Big Mac and Applebloom... but they secertly knew that AJ had a cruch on Rarity so they tolerated her daydreaming as much as they could. Applejack opened the letter quicker than a scootaloo on her scooter and started reading. After she read the letter her heart stopped and she started to cry while the letter drifted to the ground. Applebloom walked up onto the porch with her older sister and saw the letter and read it... Applebloom was shocked then looked at her sister and tried to comfort her... This wasn't going to be a easy time for either Rarity or Applejack at all...
To my most honest companion Applejack,
I am indeed very sorrowful to inform you that tomarrow I am filing bankruptcy and moving out... I am selling all of my and Sweetie Belle's posscessions to pay off our bills as well as sell our home... we have no other option... I write to you hoping that you may have some idea of a place that i can stay at or find work... But I must find something soon for fear that I may lose my darling little sister and move to Manehattan or somewhere else to find more work...... Please let me know at your earlist convience...
-Your Friend,
Rarity
Then Applebloom came up with a idea...
"Wait... Sis! I got it! Why don't you offer Rarity and Sweetie belle to live with us and help with the farm?" she offered.
When Applejack heard this, she jolted up and turned to her sister.
"That's a heck of a idea Applebloom! Y'a right! I'd best get over to Rarity's to ask her!" The mare dashed off to get over to Carousel Boutique as fast as she could. If Rarity said yes then Applejack might finally get to admit her feelings for the beautiful mare... She just hoped that she wasn't too late...
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The last of their things went onto the loading stuck. It was all going to different ponies who bought various items for themselves... Rarity was sad that it had to come to this. She and Sweetie Belle had each one sack of belongings that they couldn't be without... various trinkets and pictures as well as some snacks in case they weren't able to purchase food with what few funds they had... Then Rarity saw a Orange mare running towards them... wearing a leather hat and her blonde mane flowing behind her. Applejack... she must've received her letter... how come she always got her letters and read them so quickly? She sent it only hours ago... Applejack stopped in front of Rarity and was catching her breath.
"Rarity... I... got... your... letter... whew... and I t'was wonderin' if you... would like to stay with me and my folks... we could use any kind of assitance... with yer' magic and such: housework, sewing, levitating the apples off dem' trees... What do ya say? We would love do have ya'll both stay... Sweetie Belle could room with Applebloom and you and me could share a room if you'd like... I mean we could clean up the guest room if you'd want but-"
At that moment she was cut off by a tight hug by the unicorn sisters.
"OOH, Applejack! Yes! We would love that very much! You don't know how much this means to us! Thank you! But please don't worry about cleaning! We won't be a bother! Again THANK YOU!" Rarity shouted with glee. Applejack, her savior! There couldn't be a nicer mare in all of Equestria!
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The story has an interesting concept, but the story seems a bit rushed. You need to put a bit more description in it, seriously you wrote off Rarity's and Sweetie Belle's parents in like one sentence. The last paragraph was the worse, you didn't even make a new paragraph when Rarity replied to Applejack. Also you tend to forget to space your paragraphs. If you're not going to space your paragraphs, then at least indent the new paragraph so we know someone else is talking.
Is your story bad? No, I rather like it, and it's okay considering it's your first fanfiction. The first chapter needs a bit of cleaning up and you need to pace yourself more, but I'm rather interested in where this is going.
I like it! I agree with Mattricole a bit, but those are only improvements!
Also, isn't her name supposed to be Sweetie BELLE, not Sweetie Bell?
Liking it so far!
2623892
Thank you! I will work on that when I work on the next chapter tonight! thank you for the critizism!
P.S.- PLEASE DON'T TAKE THAT AS SARCASM!!!
Sounds interesting, added to my Read It Later pile (even though it's large enough as-is). And hoping it'll address in a believable way just HOW Rarity falls out of want in the fashion world, short of in the summary.
Even if it is rushed with the intro/prologue to the true story, supposedly.
Sorry to waste comment space, but... I just wanted to say that I do have hopes for this, even if Rarijack isn't a top pairing of mine, but I still enjoy it, as with most ships with being flexible pretty much.
And the concept does seem unique at least. 
2623931
... I do believe you are correct... I shall fix it at once!
Allow me to add that it does seem rushed. The concept is interesting, I most definately want to know more about how Rarity came to her fall.
The old saw about show, don't tell? When we are simply told that aj has a crush, rather than shown, it lessens the impact.
So this is not me just criticising a story I did like, you did a good job with AJ's 'voice', and I do in fact want to see where you take this next. Good luck!
2627175
Maybe a few flashbacks about how Applejack first meet Rarity, learned she had a sister Applebloom's age, maybe the first time she noticed how beautiful she is when she's not paying attention to herself, things like that could show Applejack's crush without just laying it out in the open.
Slow things down a bit. Like others mentioned, give us more detail about their parents death; when, how, it could be a plot twist revealing bits and pieces now and then.
You used scene breaks well, so kudos to that. Oh, and thank you for mentioning why Sweetie Belle lives with Rarity instead of just saying she does. Apparently most writers (including the show's) presume sisters always live together.
That's all I got for now.