Glossary of Terms
Author's Note: You may have noticed that I made up several words and concepts over the course of the story. I supplied definitions and explanations on fanfiction.net, but neglected to do so here. I thought I should rectify that. Each entry has a parenthetical amendment indicating where it's first used.
Definitions:
Anthropophile (anne-THROH-poh-fie-uhl) n. One who is fascinated by humans, the concept thereof, and/or the morphology thereof. (Chapter 9)
Celestmas (seh-LEST-muss) n. Celestia's birthday, celebrated on the tenth of Autumber (analogous to October on Earth.) Lunamas, more obscure but rapidly becoming less so, is on the seventeenth. (Chapter 7)
Euclopean (you-CLOPE-ee-an) adj. 1. Of or relating to Euclop, pioneering mathematician of the ancient Haylennic Republic. 2. Related to geometry in a flat plane. (Chapter 7)
Harvember (hahr-VEM-burr) n. Ninth month of the Equestrian calendar, marked by Summer Shutdown and the beginning of fall. Analogous to September. (Chapter 19)
Haylennic (hay-LEHN-ick) adj. Of or relating to ancient Grayce. (Chapter 12)
Hippocampic (hip-oh-CAMP-ick) adj. Of or relating to Hippocampes, the doubly legendary seapony known as the Father of Medicine. (Chapter 7)
Incitat (IN-sih-taht) n. Eighth month on the Equestrian calendar, analogous to August. Named for Incitatus, famed royal consort. (AC 2342-2407) (Chapter 5)
Marescovite (MAIR-scoh-vite) adj. Of or relating to the city of Marescow, located near Stalliongrad. n. A pony from Marescow. May or may not have a minigun named Sascha. (Chapter 7)
Mongoat (MOHN-goat) n. A member of the hordes of ancient Mongoatia, a region of scrubland and desert to the west of Equestria. adj. Of or relating to those hordes or that nation. (Chapter 9)
Multibanged (mull-tee-BAYNED) adj. 1. Of or possessing multiple exclamation points. 2. (Ankh-Morpork) Of or relating to a sign of mental instability. (Chapter 14)
Pegasine (PAY-guh-sign) adj. Of or relating to pegasi. (Chapter 2)
Ponnequin (POE-neh-kin) n. A pony-shaped mannequin. (Chapter 2)
Prancophilic (PRAIN-koh-fil-ick) adj. Admiring the language, culture, and/or ponies of Prance.
Ungula (uhn-GYOO-lah) n. The plane in which Equestria is located. At least one solar system in size. Noted for its total absence of humans, and relative scarcity of humanoids in general. (Chapter 7)
Inventions:
Cesium dragon: Mightiest of the little-known alkali metallic dragons. Famous among dracologists for its fire breath, which burns faster than the speed of entropy. Normally, this wouldn't even make sense, but dragonbreath, like dragons, is magical enough to make it work anyway. What this means is that the information of an object incinerated by cesium dragonbreath is preserved even though the object itself is not. Through the proper rituals of magiquantum entanglement, this can turn a cesium dragon into an instantaneous delivery system.
Note: Unlike many of their lesser cousins, most notably the sodium dragon, cesium dragons neither burst into flame nor explode when exposed to water. Please bear this in mind when attempting to slay one. (Chapter 8)
The Cloppler Effect: Identical to the Doppler Effect, the phenomenon where motion relative to the source of a sound makes that sound change in apparent frequency. (Chapter 14)
KLOP Radio: Radio Free Ponyville, home of DJ Pon3 and MC <3. (Chapter 14)
Muffylactery (MUH-phil-ack-tur-ee) n. A unique variant of magical prosthesis for the Equestrian pony (Equunculus filia) designed to replicate the flexible, spell-form magic of the unicorn subspecies in the others, who are normally limited to innate abilities. Similar in both functionality and design to the magic wands of several universes, these prostheses are generally composed of a core material with high thaumic capacitance encased in a magical semiconductor, usually a stable organic material such as wood. Each individual soul must be matched to a specific core/casing combination for optimal performance. Most such prostheses are modeled in the form of unicorn horns, but studies suggest that the shape of the casing can be as important as its composition, if not more so. Because of several commonly required core materials' exceeding rarity (sphinx hair), expense (stabilized rainbow), and/or inherent danger (cockatrice feather), they are more hypothetical applications of magic theory and curiosities of the rich than common items.
Ditzy Doo's muffylactery is self-made. The casing is composed of Zendikar hedron stone, noted for its high magic capacitance. The core's composition is unknown, as is who taught her how to make the device. (Chapter 1)
Postal abbreviations: CA - Califoalnia, CS - Cantershire, NY - New Yoke (Chapter 19)
Ramen feedbag: An application of one-use spell seals, in which a specific spell is coded to be cast upon the seal's destruction. In this case, the seal acts as a separating partition between two chambers of a disposable plastic nosebag. One side contains instant oats and dried seasonings, while the other holds water. Pulling the strap on the top of the container not only allows it the be slipped over the muzzle for a hand-free meal, but breaks the seal, mixing the wet and dry components and casting a weak heat generation spell. The end result is something resembling oatmeal. Cheap, easy, and very popular amongst college students. (Chapter 5)
Speedy Service: (5436-5509) The daughter of a restauranteur, she discovered her talent for communication at a young age and revolutionized the magical discipline of telepathy. Her work continues to be the foundation of most modern communication spells, including the silent tactical network of the Royal Mageguard. Sadly, vague and spotty records from the time have resulted in an ongoing debate amongst historians as to which of as many as five different unicorns was really Speedy Service. (Chapter 13)
Temporal omnipresence: The ability to perceive time from an objective, nonlinear perspective, a.k.a. being in two times at the same place. Or different places. Or more than two times. (Chapter 16)
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Funny. I just finished rereading this story yesterday before you added this. Certainly helps a bit.
690831 Omigosh. Does... does this count as fanart?
I won't be so crass as to say that it'd look better in the actual planeswalker frame. You know, other than by saying that.
704407 Really? Could you explain it to me? I've just been taking dictation. I really do need to give Miss Pie coauthor credit...
742393 Now there's a scary thought. Pinkie, Lady of Secrets. Or, if you like Cupcakes, Pinkie, Pony Vivisectionist
778128 808898
All I'm going to say to both of you is: Keep reading.
1804649
If by "Derpy" you mean the scourge of Town Hall seen in "The Last Roundup," She Who Knows Not What Went Wrong is easily and solidly red, combining the destructive and comedic aspects of mountain mana seen in goblin tribes across the Multiverse. The affinity for lightning doesn't hurt either.
In fact, one card I've made very nicely demonstrates this:
Derpmolish 2R
Tribal Sorcery — Pegasus
As an additional cost to cast Derpmolish, tap an untapped Pegasus you control.
Destroy target artifact or land.
The road to ruin is paved with good intentions.
1811223 Oh. Oh. My bad.
U is shorthand for the blue mana symbol, since B represents the black one and L indicated land cards. Sorry for the confusion.
1809635 Hey thanks for the answers and sorry for the spam. I read this fic in oh 3 days and I loved it. Also be noted that I use derpy and ditzy interchangebly so both are the same. When i mean derpy i ment the main character in this story. In other news I thoroughly enjoyed this fic and will read the "supposed" sequel (thougha fair warning is in order... I tend to be disapointed with sequels.
1823984 Given that that was the intended tune, well done.
A shame you didn't record it. If the Internet has taught us anything, it's that if something is worth doing, it's worth doing badly but passionately.
1876878 No need to apologize. It's flattering more than anything. I hope you enjoy the sequels.
1959118 Thank ya kindly
2191115 That's embarasing. For someone who is a fan of the Un.sets not noticing that they have silver borders =S shit
2188644
If your playgroup is okay with made-up cards and you mention who came up with them, go ahead! Just bear in mind that, while I tried to balance them as best I could, these cards haven't been playtested at all.
2245556
Yeah, single colored red. It's really hella good in the standard playstyle. Stuff like Hellrider, Stromkirk Noble, Ash Zealot, Zealous Conscripts, and burn. also Boros Reckoner. He's fun. Ive placed first in one fnm and third at the most recent running my build. I could note you a decklist if you're interested. And my EDH deck is Glissa the Traitor, with Infect creatures! Also, Aurelia-Eldrazis.
Sorry for taking up valuable comment space with MTG speak.
2192334
I've actually got an entire Pony deck i made in Magic Set Editor, an application with which to create your own cards. albeit, you have to print them on paper, then throw the cutout in front of a real card in sleeves, it's pretty fun.
2192163
Hey, now, don't get beat up over it! Everypony derps up here and there. Too many sets obviously make it hard to remember, especially if you dont use them as much.
2245556
Yeah, single colored red. It's really hella good in the standard playstyle. Stuff like Hellrider, Stromkirk Noble, Ash Zealot, Zealous Conscripts, and burn. also Boros Reckoner. He's fun. Ive placed first in one fnm and third at the most recent running my build. I could note you a decklist if you're interested. And my EDH deck is Glissa the Traitor, with Infect creatures! Also, Aurelia-Eldrazis.
Sorry for taking up valuable comment space with MTG speak.
2192334
I've actually got an entire Pony deck i made in Magic Set Editor, an application with which to create your own cards. albeit, you have to print them on paper, then throw the cutout in front of a real card in sleeves, it's pretty fun.
2192163
Hey, now, don't get beat up over it! Everypony derps up here and there. Too many sets obviously make it hard to remember, especially if you dont use them as much.
2247288 My playgroup doesn't hold much truck with that "Standard" nonsense. Also, I lack the aggressive mindset needed to succeed with mono-red decks. Though I do have one, actually: I forgot about my Goblins deck earlier. Fun with Krenko and Warbreak Trumpeter (has Morph XXR and "When Warbreak Trumpeter is turned face-up, put X 1/1 red Goblin creature tokens onto the battlefield.").
How knowledgeable of Magic: The Gathering would one have to be to enjoy this story? It's peaked my interest but I don't know much beyond how tho play the game.
2400753
I tried to keep the story accessible to those unacquainted with the overarching Magic storylines. I think you'll be able to enjoy it. If you have any questions, leave a comment or send me a PM.
Alright, I'm properly awake now, and ready to give a proper comment.
This story had such promise. It had *SUCH* promise. It was brilliantly written, had an excellent plot, great characterization, a beautiful and sympathetic take on Ditzy's life, real struggles for the character, it was great.
And then in comes Pinkie. And then you killed it. You just fucking killed it.
You turned everything that was your Ditzy into an absolute joke. You took her life, her struggles, everything she's worked for, and just beat them to death with a pink, balloon themed claw hammer. Everything she's done means almost exactly nothing. Why?
Because Pinkie did just about everything Ditzy did with absolutely zero effort, because LOL SHE'S A PLANESWALKER TOO LOLOLOL. You've Mary Sue'd Pinkie so hard in this, she's all but turned into a red and black alicorn named Thunder Blaze or something equally as horrid.
It turns into something a ten year old high on sugar and /b/ wrote. "OH AND THEN ALL THE BALLOONS TURNED INTO TROLLFACES AND THEN THE FUNNY PONY SAID YOUTUBE AND THEN PINKIE WAS A PLANESWALKER BECAUSE SHE KNOWS *ALLLLLL* THE MEMES AND THEN SHE TURNED INTO AN AWESOME DRAGON WING PONY AND STARTED KICKING EVERYONE'S BUTTS AND WAS AWESOME AND THEN THERE WERE MORE MEMES AND LOOOOOLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!11111ONEONEELEVEN"
This story's drowning in a lake, and Pinkie's the one who pushed it in. Every time it tries to come up for air, that there's a little bit of hope, she bashes it over the head with a shovel with a trollface painted on it and screams "YOU MAD BRO?!?!?!1"
This has turned into an utter train wreck, and I have to say, I'm disappointed both in the story and in you. I've got no idea what you were attempting with all that. Were you just hoping to substitute random references for meaningful dialogue? Did you just get writer's block and substitute copy/pasting random 4chan threads into it for trying to get around it?
Whatever the reason, you've cheated your character out of her story. Ditzy's story has taken a back seat to Pinkie being LOLOL SO RANDOM 20% COOLER THAN EVERYPONY ELSE!!11. Every time Ditzy starts making proper headway, getting her own story back on track, Pinkie pops in and ruins it.
It's a damn shame, really. This was turning out to be so good...
2411389
I do rather agree. All of the Pinkie Pie shenanigans hindered my enjoyment of the story.
Overall though, I would still give this story a thumbs up, because while it was frustrating at times, I enjoyed more than I hated. Also, Dinky is best filly.
2418685 I agree. It really was quite a good story, I just couldn't finish it because every time something serious was happening, it was just PINKIE OUT OF *FUCKING NOWHERE* WITH MEMES! It still got a thumbs up from me, just from what it could have been.
2418764
The laughter elemental was literally made of memes. What were you expecting from the Bearer?
That said, you seem to be conflating memes and references...
Eh, we've already discussed this.
2419790 Exactly my point. We've discussed it, and politely agreed to disagree. I was simply discussing my views with someone else, as we did our discussion in PM.
2483782 But then you can counter the couneter that countered your counterspell.... WHY DO YOU WANT TO TAKE AWAY THE FUN PART OF THE GAME!!
2484952 Cause the game only lets a certain number of counter spells in the stack before it says enough with the objections and the spell is countered.
There are a bunch of other ways to get around counter spells though.
2485012 Not if you play Psychatog XD
2481999
One of the more subtle card references in the story, but yes, Dinky is asking for the SoBaM. Good catch!
1821649
Because you can only activate planeswalker abilities when you could cast a sorcery. There would never be a legal target for a loyalty ability counterspell. It would have to be along the lines of, "Counter the next spell an opponent casts unless that opponent (blah)." You certainly couldn't do countercountercounterspell shenanigans.
2567825 Oi! That's not true!! *Says a White Planeswalker.*
3497073Which reminds me of casting Magic Missile at The Darkness.
I read this over 12 hours and I started at 3PM.
WHY MUST YOUR STORY BE SO GOOD AS TO RUIN MY SLEEP CYCLE?!
This was a very entertaining story, and a bit disturbing as well; it seems you have had several ideas that I've had myself, such as Ditzy Doo being able to travel through parallel universes and her cutie mark representing that (although in my head the bubbles represent wormhole event horizons and her eyes allow her to see non-Euclidean folds in space-time along the axes of the curled dimensions predicted by String Theory).
It was... odd, reading something that I could have easily produced myself, right down to the cheesy pop culture references, ridiculous puns, and insane amounts of meta. META EVERYWHERE. Delicious. It also made me feel a bit bad that I don't know as much about the MTG lore as I could, despite being a fan of it since the 90s.
Still love a green/white deck, even if I suck at the game. 
My only real complaint is how quickly Twilight just kinda tossed off the nasty stuff towards the end. Oh, sure, I know she didn't fully, but still, it seems she's dealing with the complete and total inversion of her personality. And it was; she represents magic, but in Equestria, friendship is magic, so she should basically represent friendship. Which she kinda does, as in many episodes she's often the calm, rational, mediating figure, with notable exceptions. And here she's just going to basically murder innocents and wipe out the entire plane of existence just to win, just because she can... even if she was insane at the time, afterwards she should be a complete and total wreck.
Ah, well. Still good, definitely a favorite, even if it does get a bit too random at times. Several points I was struggling to figure out how the scene change made any kind of sense; you might want to tone it back a bit and work on describing the scenes more so as to avoid confusing the reader.
8.5/10
This story has been reviewed by: The Equestrian Critics Society
Story Title: Elementals of Harmony
Author: FanOfMostEverything
Reviewed by: Shahrazad
First and foremost, Elementals of Harmony is a Magic: the Gathering crossover. From this crossover it gets a world shattering problem and some cool battle scenes. Plus, the star is none other than Ditzy Doo. Ditzy is trying to save the world from things only she can see with her special eyes. The rest of the story follows a simple formula that tends to eschew drama for action.
It isn’t a perfect story, but it gets more things right than wrong. If you’re a fan of Magic, and you’ve spent considerable time in your life consuming various pieces of media, (books, movies, games) go ahead and read this one. The references will probably keep you laughing and the action sequences are fulfilling. Just don’t worry too much about any particular lines that seem out of place, it’s probably a meta-fiction reference you just don’t get.
Full Review
Score: 7.5/10
4010033
But does it have protection from wordy?
4014293
Nope. The card is an enhanced Laccolith Rig. The version you wrote prevents the damage that would be dealt to the enchanted creature. Important difference.
Just finished rereading this, and I noticed a lot more typos than I did the first time. I forgot to note of where they were, but they were mostly in the early-to-middling chapters.
And with the benefit of hindsight (or is it foresight?), I find myself wondering: is the threat Twilight alluded to Phyrexian in origin?
4044107
The vague, ominous threat was actually supposed to be Discord. I'll add something to the description clarifying the time period.
And yeah, I need to go back and edit this at some point.
Still, I'm very flattered that this was worth a reread when you were bored.
4412372 Oh, I have no problem with mono-color decks. (In the comment you replied to, two of the non-EDH decks I listed were mono-color, and I've since created a mono-blue control deck and a Flamekin/Cinder deck that has only Mountains despite technically being red/black.) But I was asking for more detail from the person I replied to, because, the way I read it, it sounded like they were claiming to play mono-red exclusively, which boggles my mind.
I made you an al8um cont8ning your cards.
It's right here. Unfortun8tely, I don't have any card art, so that's missing. But everything else is th8re.
~Vriska Serket
4017694 A) Nope.
2) Ok8y. It still reads rather str8ngely, though. Also, I didn't know you replied until I got a reply from chapter 14, and even then I only found out a8out it 8ecause I decided to go 8ack and look at the comment directly instead of just clicking on the >>name thing. So 88sically, just in c8se you or anyone else who happens to read this comment didn't already know this, replying to a comment on a story is not gu8ranteed to notify the replyee unless your comment is on the s8me chapter as the one you're replying to.
~Vriska Serket
Wonderful story, start to finish. I would say I "hope to see more" in this universe except for the fact that you've already written more, in large quantities, so you beat me to the punch.
The pony-themed magic cards at the end of each chapter were cute too (the ones in your blog posts are interesting, but a few important cards to complement the events of a chapter are infinitely cooler than a whole bunch to represent an episode that's not fresh in the reader's mind).
I have to agree that Pinkie did a lot of damage to this story. I think I can explain why in the form of this clip from Who Framed Roger Rabbit?
"You mean to tell me that you could've taken your hand outta that cuff at ANY TIME?"
"No, not at any time! Only when it was funny!"
Pinkie has her amazing powers because they are funny. If they are useful, they stop being funny. If they are not funny, then there's no point in her being Pinkie Pie. Making Pinkie Pie a Planeswalker who casts spells and helps save the day is a hopelessly doomed effort, all it does is undermine everything else that tries to be serious. Your story can have important moments, and it can have fourth-wall-breakers, but it can't have the same character doing both.
Plus, SHE'S the nexus of black mana? The color identity in this fic made no sense at all, beyond Rainbow Dash being red. Fluttershy, miss "Every Single Thing I Do Is About Nature", is not white, she is green. Niceness is not white alone. Kindness for no other purpose than kindness is pretty green. Applejack, with her love of the truth and her strong familial bonds, is the white one. Twilight Sparkle is clearly the bluest blue mana ever to leave two Islands untapped, and making her "none/all of the above" forces you to push other colors out of place. Generosity isn't blue and Rarity isn't blue -- Rarity is black. Her greatest strength is generosity, but her greatest failing is also avarice; she is the one who most blatantly helps other people because helping them creates a situation she wants to have (not having to see tacky things), which is one of the few ways Black heroes work. So that forces you to push Laughter into black, which made no sense and you seemed to realize it, given how quickly you dispatched it. Pinkie Pie should be the "none of the above" character, in a way that removes her from dramatic action. The other 5 may be attuned to the five colors of mana, and Pinkie Pie runs on megabucks, ghost rock, meeples and sheep.
And why is Ditzy monoblue? She's nothing like her other fandom portrayals which is, okay, not binding -- but she never does anything ditzy OR derpy. Even her inability to guide the birds back is explained off as something that doesn't really reflect her character. She is essentially a completely original character with Ditzy's name. She's very contemplative and very intelligent and very calculating which is exactly what this story didn't need. Why isn't Ditzy Izzet? It fits her fandom character better -- at least the "not sure if she's an idiot or a genius" interpretation, AND it fits your narration better. Your narration isn't from a blue mage, your narration goes off on tangents and bizarre threads and weird logic and fits perfectly for an R/U speaker.
5863819
I take it you never read the Invasion block novels. I didn't make up Commodore Guff. He was basically the Pinkie Pie of the Nine Titans, and he literally rewrote history to give Dominaria a fighting chance against Old Phyrexia. Besides, Pinkie herself has important moments as early as the series premiere. Or do you consider using a musical number to disrupt a spell of incapacitating fear unimportant?
As for the color associations, I'm afraid you're laboring under a misapprehension. The mana wasn't aggregating based on the Bearers, but on their Elements as abstract concepts. I admit that I had to twist a few of them to fit the five color model, but Honesty is an inherent part of green, especially its opposition to blue and black, while Kindness is similarly inherent to white. And if the Element of Magic isn't "all of the above," I don't know what is.
And Ditzy? The entire point of this story was to present an alternate character interpretation of her. This story was started back during the summer of 2011 on fanfiction.net, during the gap between Seasons 1 and 2, back before Derpy became a running gag. Also, the narration usually isn't her.
5890607
I just know Phyresis when I see it.
5896950
I can promise you that this story is glistening-oil-free.
5932016 Oh how about their lamentations as i savage summon the sire of insanity right after they get a revelation.
An interesting read, even with my severe lack of knowledge on most of the source material (I blame a lack of people I can play against...the bane of my existence when it comes to cardgames)
5977098
I'm glad you enjoyed it, and I hope I was able to explain the more card game-intensive parts clearly. (And there's always Magic Online.)
5977111
I only have the season 8 deck that gave me back in the day, even with an eternally free account.
6389233 that would normally be ok except no one uses it but you.
6530731
What? Would you rather Ditzy be able to bounce crap each turn for +1? Or +2? Or maybe bouncing two permanents each turn? Or maybe do Show and Tell?
Well, that was scary for a while; was afraid you were going to go all the way to The Immortal Game levels there for a bit, but I managed to read it all and I feel like a better person for having done so.
Thanks for writing this.
6602200
You're welcome. I'm glad you enjoyed it.