Adding to the read later list because you got my interest.

5579044
Thank you so much. Please enjoy yourself and do mind the extensive descriptions in the early chapters. They can sometimes be a little doozy-rific.

Holy shit, Photo Finish is Fate................

5580268
Not quite... there is a third character in that memory orb scene.

5580836 Well, its not Sparkle.......who's the other..........

Oh you and your special mentions~

I really liked this chapter. It did not provide too much information in terms of how Fate came to be, but there is enough to at least make inferences and connect back to what we already know about her. Fun fact for anyone who doesn't know: Powder Rouge is the one who made Fluttershy ~dapper~. Take a look.

This could mean that either Powder Rouge is who Fate used to be, or she was the first test-types of the project that would result in Fate. If the former, I will have to redo my drawing of her.

Her internal musings are cryptic. I'm not 100% sure about what they mean, but they add to her character nonetheless. There is a sense that her endgame in all this isn't as upstanding as we'd like to think. More on this farther down.

[Personal Comment]
The memory orb gave me slight pause. What are the chances that the one our characters come across has insight relevant to Fate, amongst all the other many experimental sciences going on during war-time Equestria? It seems plausible with reader speculation: Jimmy found the orb while scavenging around some Ministry facilities and held onto it for a long time until finding the means through Galena to view what it held. By that point he had already met Fate. Him finding it after the fact, though, would be far too convenient.

Still, I'm willing to keep going with the flow. Little Pip came across a whole slew of orbs in her run with pivotal information as to the history of the war and the major players that lived through it. It stands to reason that there is an enormous number of orbs out in the wasteland to be found and viewed by up-and-coming story protagonists, allowing authors to provide all manner of plot-heavy details.
[/Personal Comment]

Moving right along,

If The Big Lebowski was made in Equestria, you think it was based around the lives of these guys? It really ties the room together, indeed.

"Don’t you worry, he’ll get over it. Just don’t expect many of us to be too friendly for a while. I know you saved us from a worse fate" - Mysterious Ghoulified Bovine

A nod to the symbolism behind Fate's name? An omen of her ultimate goal? When I say I don't know, I'm not lying, unlike our spec-ops cyborg friend.

TypoBlam.exe

"I totally trust you, Chaffy, but there’s some crazy, freaking tech in here that I’m sure those ‘friends’ of your’s would love to get their hooves on."

"Yours" is the only possessive word that does not require an apostrophe. English is funny that way. Comes up again with Raze:
“You tink it’s just luyk your’s, but you’re wrong.

"She smirked as she repelled down the building. There was nothing greater in the world than planned impetuousness." Rappelled is the word you're thinking of here. Apparently it's one of the essential skills of a climber, and one of the more dangerous aspects of the sport. Literally the first paragraph of the first google result restated in verbatum.

"Inching her way down the i-beam towards the chain, she prayed." I've never seen an i-beam, mostly because having a piece of metal quantum entangled with a metal bar and held suspended with it is beyond our current scope of technology. I have however seen I-beams, which are far simpler to create and are great for building... buildings. Yes I am aware this whole thing is convoluted but I felt it apt, as opposed to simply saying "The I needs to be capitalized".

5581440
Desrium's got this. He goes over it a bit in his big comment. Thank you so much for reading, though! There's still more to find out about WTF Photo Finish is doing with Twilight.

5581563
Your sharp eye never ceases to amaze.

I could imagine a conversation:
"Galena, where'd you get this recollector and orb?"
"Oh, you know. Jimmy gave it to me."
"Jimmy?" (Looks around.) "Where the heck did he get it?"

Really though, Fate's past is only a little piece of this story. Her arc is just one that I really enjoy and sympathize with. Next chapter is all big, general plot points that'll land like water balloons filled with paint exploding in a white room.

Well, Lebowski references are a MLP:FiM tradition! Just like Dr. Who references are a Fallout one. Also, the Fate/fate catch: nice, breh, and this one was actually on purpose!

Time for some quick editing...

Your book has been advertised on the new facebook group page: https://www.facebook.com/groups/foebooks/ :)