Although your new life might be as close to perfect as it could possibly get, doubts begin to surface in your mind as to why you have been treated so kindly. Why have you been accepted? Fed? Clothed? Housed? Why have any of these things occurred when you have done nothing to deserve them?

A certain Princess of the Sun provides the answer.

EDIT 11/21/2019: Now with an audio reading by StraightToThePointStudio! https://youtu.be/-K0XO7HUVNg

So... my name is Ciaphas Cain, and I am—or, at least, I was—a newly-minted Commissar fresh out of the Schola Progenium. By some horrid twist of fate, I got assigned to the Valhallan 18th and its infamous Commander, which has just been sent to a newly discovered backwater garden world to dispose of its oddly horse-like xeno population.

The next thing I know, I'm stranded on the planet in an alien body, the Xenos’ leader is in a coma for the foreseeable future, and her subjects—despite knowing full well that I was once a member of the same group of Imperials who’d struck her down—have shoved me onto her now-vacant throne for reasons having to do with the fact that my new body has wings and a horn. And I'm apparently a psyker now thanks to that horn, and a stupidly powerful one at that. Oh, and have I mentioned that these xenos expect me to somehow lead them to victory against the trigger-happy Inquisitor that seeks to wipe them off the face of the galaxy with nothing but my savviness, a cunning mind, a silver tongue, the resources of a race completely oblivious to the grim darkness of the far future, and the magical power of peace, joy, rainbows, and orbital friendship lasers? I don't think I had.

Brace yourselves; things somehow manage to get even wackier from there.

This is heavily inspired by Ciaphas Cain: Warmaster of Chaos, and as a result it does not take itself too seriously. If you want a grimdark brutalization fic in which the ponies get slammed with the horror of war, prepare to be disappointed.

Here's EAW's timeline btw

And here is an image of the map of EAW + Europe.

Late Victorian era Europe of 1888 is inserted into the EAW universe in their respective year of 774ALB (Just after Grover I fails his invasion of Sicameon). Also, none of the Europeans remain human. Discord blushes.

Grover I, or the soon-to-be, "The Blessed," rests his creaky bones as he receives news of the defeat against Sicameon. Grover II will remember that. He pays little mind to this advancement, after all, he expected as much considering he only sent a meagre force mostly comprised of levies and Acquilean sellswords in his so-called 'military expedition,' though, he regrets the unifying effect he inadvertently initiated on the Parishes.

Across the sea, Celestia, as always carefully schemes and manipulates the fates of her neighbours, namely, Severyana, of which royal family and attached royal court she had been patiently nudging into a hyperbolic pit of Tartarus every generation or so to orchestrate a succession crisis. She figured they would blow up in 22 years. Of course, she could just ditch the mind-numbingly slow subtlety and just kick the Tzar in the flank and turn the boyars into ash, but she doubted the proud burghers and peasants of Severyana would appreciate that one bit.

Meanwhile, in Europe.

The Brits wept at the loss of their source of tea.

The Russians purchased a noose upon realising there was nothing past the Ural mountains.

The French erupted in civil disobedience, protests, riots; political and regular violence epidemic, Paris was in ru- oh wait, sorry, France was completely normal.

The Germans drowned themselves in beer. To their wives, 'it was because they had turned into mythical lion-eagle hybrids'. But really, they always finding excuses to get plastered.

The Austro-Hungarians continued to be a tongue-twister, and the powderkeg they sat on turned into a RBMK reactor with Dyatlov in charge.

The Italians surrendered to their mirrors when they awoke.

The Swiss became dragons.

The Spanish pretended that they had lost alot.

The Nords ate glue & paste.

The Balkans became Balkan-ier.

And the Portuguese... Uh, they existed.

Written on a phone.

I don't check my work. (It drains my motivation)

About my writing style: Why yes, I enjoy the mass assault doctrine. How could you tell???

I'm creatively bankrupt and have been playing an unhealthy amount of Victoria III and Equestria at War, and after my 9th playthrough of genocidal Suntail and Funni black flag Russia, I had the brilliant idea of writing a fic with the premise of Victorian Europe tryna scramble up the continents of Equus, Griffonia and Zebrica during their kinda-Renaissance.

It is very niche, but this story is mostly for me. I had to make a part of my brain shut up and unfortunately, my lobotomist got arrested, so I gotta do this now.

Yay, I got featured.

The shitty title pic is mine.

What it says on the box. Pinkie Pie has a hearse (somehow). She drives it. Hijinks ensue. What kind of hijinks? You'll have to read to find out!
_{I don't own Hasbro or FiM}

This description is inspired by a thing Eldorado said years ago.

Was also my entry in the Go Steady in the Dark event on writeoff.me.

Pinkie Pie devises a new plan to drum up money for Sugarcube Corner and spread cheer to all of the ponies of Equestria.

It doesn't exactly turn out the way she hoped.

Pre-read by the amazing LadyCobraa.
Cover done by BlackStealth08.
Dramatic Youtube Reading by EnderBlaze.

Featured on 2/3/2014. Whoa. That's pretty tight.
Also 100% Approved by Twilight's Library!

You're all invited to the most unlikely wedding of all time. Who is getting married and how will the Mane Six handle the most surprising twist they've ever seen? Read to find out.

Proof Read By: FlutterDash7 & Frostfur
Edited By: MysteryMare
Cover Pic By: MysteryMare & FlutterDash7

Following another date together, Discord asks Fluttershy to talk dirty to him.

Perhaps he should've been clearer about it.

Rarity has an important question for her close friend, Twilight Sparkle.

Written for the Choices: Species Swap competition.

Pre-read, edited, and generally helped significantly by the awesome Gravelordnito.

Featured on 27/11/22, thank you! Thank you all!

Casketbase77 - Indisputably the best mood piece of this year’s batch of entries....This is neither a comfortable fic nor a feelgood fic.... Reflection is heavy on heartache, light on closure, and carried terrifically by Rarity's refusal to give up on a very troubled friend.

Edit: Now part of the Reflection-Verse Group

Edit: Now with an Audio Readthrough by Rainflicj3r

Everypony knows that Pinkie Pie throws the best parties.
Fewer ponies know about her 'special parties'.
Join Pinkie and her closest friends as they learn more about themselves and the world around them through the lens of intoxication.
Don't worry, Pinkie will make sure everypony is safe and comfortable. After all, what are friends for?

Credits to Sony-Shock for the cover.
Thanks to Arkadios, Frostworthy, Perfectly Insane, 6-D Pegasus, and tailsopony for pre-reading and formatting assistance.

Featured 8/20. Thanks everypony!

Rarity has a secret but is unsure if she should come out or not. She is a changeling. She had hoped to tell her friends after Cadence's wedding, but due to Chrysalis crashing the party she now fears what her friends will think of her once they know the truth.

Cover Image credit: https://derpibooru.org/tags/artist-colon-acharmingpony

Commissioned by: Tailsic

Rated T in case of mild language