Twilight Sparkle and Rarity meet up at a cafe for tea. Everything seems to be going well, until Rarity asks a rather alarming question.

Inspired by, though not very similar to, GaPJaxie's Would it matter if I was?

Reading by Illya Leonov, Scribbler and Keyframe

Siblings are weird.

Twilight, Applejack and Rarity talk about how weird theirs are.

Proofread by Pearple Prose.

Once upon a time, (if the term even applies) two young ladies, (if that adjective even applies) decided to visit a magical land of Equestria, selected seemingly at random from about a million.

• One of the two is a time traveler deprived of her time machine, the other is an eldritch abomination out of her element.
• One would prefer the world of pastel-colored ponies to stay as it is, and can’t help but alter it. The other one is anxious to see how it can change, and can’t help but maintain it.
• Both believe that this is not their story. But while they disturb the delicate world of ponies, they don’t even notice ponies doing the same to them.
• Sandwiches are involved somehow.

There are many things this story is and some things it isn’t.

It’s not a fix fic, no matter what some of the characters think. It’s written in multiple first person narration, which happened for a pointlessly clever reason, that will eventually become quite obvious. It’s not a crossover, it just comes with an unhealthy amount of backstory. It could be a rational-fic, but since idealistic philosophy is typically not seen as very rational, it’s only a philoso-fic instead. It’s quite meta, in the original definition of metafiction: fiction concerned with fiction as a concept. In any case, it’s either a small monument to overthinking things – I’m trying to reexamine many fanon ideas here – or a digital paperweight, I’m not sure which. It’s quite a bit more subtle than it could be, and everyone talks way too much when they should be having glorious adventures.
I know how it starts, I know how it ends, and most of what happens in between. Readers say it’s a slow burner, but we’ll get there eventually.

Acknowledgements

With special thanks to my editors, Thainen, Shrink Laureate, and MitchH.
Further special thanks to ScarletWeather and Themaskedferret for valuable input.
The artist who made the cover image stubbornly wishes to remain uncredited, but thanks to her anyway.

It's been a rough day for Twilight Sparkle. She was awoken in the middle of the night to save the town, had a chance to study an alien artifact ripped out from under her, and is now stuck with Applejack, Fluttershy, and her arch-nemesis Queen Chrysalis in some alien fighting tournament with a bunch of... things she doesn't even want to try and start describing without a cup of coffee and some asprin!

Indeed, Twilight and her friends have been summoned to join the latest Smash Brothers tournament! And as they explore the mysterious 'Smashworld' and meet new, colorful characters, they will be pitted head to head against new friends and enemies as well as each other! Can their friendships survive being forced to fight one another? Why are all the other 'smashers' so on edge? And what's with the bizarre being that purports to be the creator of this world, "the Master Hand?"

Only one thing is for sure. It's going to be a doozy.

IRS Scammers. We all hate them, and in Equestria, it's no different. Once technology advanced to the point of phones and computers, scamming came with it.

Unfortunately, not everypony is as gullible as some other nasty people would like.

Find this story and more in a print copy! Just click these words here!

Featured on EQD 11/26/18!

This story is a sequel to Why No One Messes With Celestia

In the wake of Celestia's return to Equus, the ponies have worked tirelessly to prepare for the arrival of the Ascended. Defenses have been set up, weapons prepared, allies warned, but most important of all in the minds of both Diarchs, a cure for the Indoctrination has been pursued.

The Ascended, or the Reapers as they are known to the rest of the galaxy, are not amused. They attack in force, unwilling to stand by and let this small, barely space-worthy race of unascended quadrupeds neutralize their most effective weapon in their march towards galactic cleansing.

Now they too shall learn to fear the dark, and the Princess who controls it.

Derpy Hooves. Loveable goofball, caring mother, dedicated mailpony.

Of course, few ponies know what she really does for a living.

Now available in Czech translation!

This story is a sequel to The King Who Would Be Man

Commission for SoundLogic. I've finally decided I know enough about the plot of where this is going that I can start posting it, though posts will go to my Patreon a month before appearing here, in future.

Set in Next of Kin to Chaos, post-Deja Q in Star Trek TNG, fourth season MLP. Twilight's ascended to become an alicorn, but none of her friends have. Discord once promised Celestia he wouldn't do anything to change that status. But when you're billions of years old, the idea of the first friend you believe you ever had dying within a century is unbearable. And Discord doesn't always keep his promises.

Tags will change as more gets written.

Parcel Post, the long-missing mailpony who delivered Discord's ticket to the Gala, staggers into work to explain where he's been. Spoilers for "Make New Friends But Keep Discord", but not serious ones.

Twilight Sparkle is having a stressful day. She has agreed to organize Rarity's surprise birthday party, but all her friends seem troubled one way or another: Applejack is overworked, Rainbow is fretting, Pinkie is acting even weirder than usual, and Fluttershy finds herself distracted by thoughts on a certain somepony.

On top of it all, Cadence sends Twilight a mysterious jewel suspected to possess magical abilities. What is the purpose of this enigmatic stone, and will its dark secrets be uncovered before it's far too late?

Rarity, meanwhile, is simply looking forward to her birthday party, even though she is technically not supposed to know about it. What she doesn't know is that she is in for a birthday she will never forget.

This story was my contribution to the Writer's Group Contest.

Chronologically, it is set at some point in the middle of Season 3.