It's Gone, and for a while, so am I · 10:10pm Feb 21st, 2022
Sooooo...
Hi.
How have you all been?
That's good.
I've been... okay. But to be honest, I haven't been writing.
There are a lot of reasons for that. I could just say that after the passing of my aunt mentioned in my previous blog, I haven't really felt like doing... much of anything. Which is, in part, true. I didn't really go into it in my previous blog, mostly because I was crying too much to really write much more than I did, but my aunt was a big part of my life. To make a long story short, my mom was working and putting herself through school and my aunt raised me for a lot of my early life.
There's more than that, but suffice to say, I haven't written much of anything lately.
Today, though, I felt like working on something. Maybe nostalgia (did you know it's Vicious Lies' 10th anniversary today?) maybe boredom, I don't know. But I went to work on something, and....
Everything is gone.
I recently built a new computer, and when I swapped over my hard drives, something was funky, and I had to wipe and reinstall windows. I thought I had everything backed up on my other drive but...
Well, obviously, I didn't. So everything is gone, pretty much.
I don't mean to be too dramatic here. Obviously, everything I've published is safe, and I did have a lot of my more recent writing on Gdocs, so that's all safe. But older stuff, old plans and half-written chapters older than about 3 or 4 years... it's all gone, and I have no way to get it back. I have tried every method I can.
So... that's kinda bummed me out. All of my newer projects are safe, like I said but... there's something about losing that old stuff. My own history, my own past. I've also lost a lot of old fandom music I had downloaded, thankfully pictures I did have properly backed up.
But the point of this blog is... after this loss, and my general disinterest in fanfiction this past year or so, both reading and writing... well. I don't know if I'll be back.
I've still go stories to tell, to be sure. There's more that I truly do want to write. Stories I want to finish. But I've got other, non-fandom projects that are taking up much more real estate in my mind right now. A large VN project I'm working on with a friend, stories that don't work with the characters or world. I want more creative freedom than fanficiton allows me.
And so, for now... let's not call this a retirement. I've still got some stuff I'll for sure be working on at some point. But let's call it a hiatus. My last hiatus lasted ~3 years. I don't know how long this one will last. I don't know how many more people are going to leave the site before I come back. And I am sorry for that, but... I also don't want to let myself just drift away without saying anything. I hate it when that happens. I like closure, I like knowing what happened to my favorite authors/stories.
I'll still be around. I check this website religiously still, and I don't expect that to stop anytime soon. And of course, I won't be taking down any of my work, so don't go worrying about that.
This is just... me letting you all know, I'm around but not active. Twidash is not as popular as it once was, and as weird as it is to think about it, I am kinda one of the "old guard". I've been around for too long, and others have stepped in to take up my place. Go give some love to new authors. They need some attention.
For now, that's what I've got for you.
Until next time, whenever that is,
Kodeake out
Geez, I'm really sorry to hear that. I know that doesn't mean all that much in the grand scheme of things, but it's the best I can do, I'm afraid. If/When you write something again, I'll be sure to read it!
In the meantime, best of luck going forward!
Sorry man. Just do the best you can, OK?
Sorry to hear about all of that. Sounds like it's been rough. Can't help with everything, but might be able to help recover some of your work.
Have you tried a program called Recuva? It's not perfect and likely won't get everything back, but it might recover some of your old work. I used it about a decade ago and it was pretty decent then. Just make sure you don't install any of the bundled garbage that comes with it.
If you want to give that a shot, you might be able to salvage some of your data. The sooner you try it, the better - every write to that drive reduces the chances of a successful recovery.
I hope that my unsolicited suggestion helps out. Good luck!
god D: literally the same thing that happened to you happened to me, down to it being an aunt with immunocompromised lungs
I also feel your pain on the hard drive issue -_- It cost me 1500 bucks to get my data returned. That's when I started keeping all my writing on Dropbox.
Keep yourself well.
Good luck with everything, Kodeake! Twidash shall reign forever!
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Sorry to hear that. Losing someone like that isn't something I'd wish on my worst enemies. It is comforting, though, to know I'm not the only one to experience it. Which is obvious, but still, thank you.
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I appreciate all the well wishes, everyone. To be honest it really makes me want to cut my hiatus short and get back to writing for all of you, lol. For now though, all I can offer you all is my thanks.
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Take all the time you need. I'm perfectly content to wait a while longer.