what happened. · 9:39pm Jan 18th, 2019
Last year, on christmas day, my dad had to be rushed to the hospital.
His condition had been in decline for a while, but it took a sudden turn for the worse. He's been in the hospital since then.
Last wednesday we received a call from the hospital at around 3 AM, asking if we could rush over because dad was in a bad way. We did, ofcourse. We got to the hospital at around 3:45 and we stayed there with him for a day and a night. He passed away on thursday at 12:05 PM.
Right now I... I don't know how to feel.
Everything is just numb. And when you look outside, nothing has changed, yet the world somehow feels... off. And you just want the world to stop for a second and acknowledge your pain, but the world doesn't care and just keeps spinning.
On the one hand I feel apathetic. I just wanna sit here and stare at the wall. On the other hand I feel like screaming, crying and the urge to break shit. But the worst thing is... I'm just trying to keep going, but no matter what I do, every action makes me feel guilty. Because I can stil do these things, and he no longer can. And its not fair.
Its not fucking fair.
And none of it makes sense. In my head I know that he's at peace. That this was a good thing. It was a relief from the sickness and struggle and hurt. And it's good. But my heart won't accept that. Sometimes the heart is a dick that won't listen to reason.
I don't even know why I'm writing this..... maybe because it gave me a sense of normalcy.
I dunno.
I am so sorry for loss.
No, no it's not fair, these things never are. I'm not going to spout some hallmark nonsense about "better places" or whatnot, I'll not be that guy. But if you want to talk, if you want to cry, if you want to scream at the world, I'm willing to listen. And so is your family, no? Whatever you do, don't wall yourself off.
hey man, I know how you feel, I was in Afghanistan when my father passed. I honestly would have rather caught a mortar myself then hear that news. if you want to talk about it, I'm willing to lend an ear, and my prayers go out to you and yours.
Life's not fair. It feels like the world should stop to acknowledge your pain, even if it's for a second, but it doesn't. Sun still rises and falls. All we can do is grieve. But, as long as we remember the time when they were alive, they're not truly gone. They live on in memory. It hurts. And it's going to keep hurting. All we can do, is keep moving forward.
I am sorry for your loss. My prayers go out to you and your family in this tragic time.
From one who lost His father in October of last year, my heart goes out to you. The most I can say is that, Think what your father would want you to do. Mine would have wanted me to be strong for my Mother and to not Cry for his loss or break down and shut everything around me off and that's what I did, I kept Moving and doing.
To me Family comes first, make sure they are doing okay and then worry about other things.
I really can't say much more then that and I hope it helps.
your father will always keep an eye on you and will be with you on your side.
An I'm sorry for what happened to you not everyone deserves it
my condolences for your father's death my friend, i sincerely hope you will find the peace your looking for after his passing and hope you will be able to move on and be stronger from this, in mind, body, heart and soul
im sorry for your loss( i may not follow you but misery needs company and if your family or friend can't help you, then this community will)
Lost my mom back in '09 when I was 18. Here's a couple things I wish I knew at the time:
Don't stop, don't think. Keep doing your daily routine. Play the games you want to play. Listen to the music you always listen to. And for the love of Insert deity here , talk to people as much as you can. Friends, family w/e. When you inevitably come out of your depression you don't want to take the habits you learn during it with you.
No one is truly gone as long as you keep them in your memory and remember what made them so important to you. It may not lessen the pain, but that is the best way to honor them.
I hope you will feel better soon and take as much time as you need. Your personal life and health, just like your loved ones, is much so more important to us than the entertainment we receive from you.
It's hard to keep moving after such a thing happens lost both of my parents and I had a few breakdowns. I'm hear for ya bruv just pm me if ya need an ear or just ta shoot the shit.
There's so much that I could say, but at this point pretty much everyone has already said it. Believe me, it hurts to lose someone you see as a father.
I lost my grandpa when I was 4, maybe 5 at the most. But to me...He was more than that, he was one of the 3 father figures that I had in my life, and it hurt to lose him.
To this day, nearly 20 years later, I still miss him. I remember he times when we would share an apple that he would peel and slice just for me. I remember when he would horseplay with me, even though he was getting on in years. But most of all, I remember that he cared about me, truly cared and would happily put time from his schedule aside to just sit and talk with me, and we would spend hours just chattering away.
But I still miss him, and that's ok, just like it will be okay for yu to miss your father for the rest of your llife. There is no 'moving on', but there is acceptance. He may be gone, but you wil never forget him.
The death of a loved one always sucks. I won't try to sugarcoat it or provide some overused platitude, because it would be pointless and disrespectful. The only advice I can give you in good conscience is this:
Let yourself hurt.
That numb feeling? That feeling like you need to keep moving despite everything, leaving you no time to just sit there and grieve? I know it from experience, and I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one. It's the contrast of relief and pain that comes from losing someone who's been suffering for a long time, and it will seriously fuck with you until you let the pain start.
Even if some part of you is relieved that he's no longer suffering, the fact remains that he's no longer here either. That's the part that you need to deal with, but that won't happen until you let it.
My deepest condolences.
I know how hard it can be to lose someone you hold dear, but I won't pretend to know what to do to feel better, I do know, however, that it can pass with time.
Talking with friends about it may help.
Im sorry for your loss, I can relate to that feeling just before christmas My family lossed our dog of 15 years to complications with cancer .
Suck it up buttercup. Despite how much you want it to, the world doesn't stop. I'm sure your dad wouldn't want you sitting here wishing it would. You slow down for one second and you get left behind. Make your dad proud and do something with yourself. Everyday is an opportunity to do something, so do it. Even if it doesnt make you feel better afterwards, it'll take your mind off it for the time being- far better than staring at a wall would. Eventually it only just lingers in the back of your mind. And far after that, itll only come up when you think about it. Work to the point. Work hard. Work long. Don't stop.
4999308
Dude......
🤦♂️
Aprion.....I know what it’s like to lose a loved one so I’m not gonna say any of that usual stuff, because it’s completely hollow. I know you’re hurting more than you ever have in your life. All I can say is good luck man.
I know how it feels to lose someone that important to you, to be where you are. I understand why you feel the way you do, but I doubt your father would want you to feel guilty for living your life after this. It's okay to mourn him, as long as you need to until you can calm down, but don't feel guilty. Take care of yourself, old friend, and know that no matter how long it's been? I'll be here for you if you need me. *Big hug*
4999308
You know your words would have a lot more strength to them if your opening line wasn't "Suck it up, Buttercup". Try to have more tact.
I'm sorry for your loss.
I'm sorry for your loss bro.
Both my grandparents passed away recently so I know all to well what your feeling. Thinking about what ifs, what could have been, things like that. I can't tell you the pain will go completly away, but in time it will lessen. Be strong my friend, and take all the time you need to grieve.
Wishing you and your family well.
Sorry for your loss.
4999363
Mmm. Fair enough. Just my honest advice. If it isnt appreciated it won't be taken and thats that. Sometimes people need tough love instead of condolences. All I know is that, were I to lose a loved one, I'd want someone to say the same exact thing. To remind me to keep going.
I know the pain you feel. My great grandmother passed away on valentines day two years ago, and I still miss her.
Dude, I know the pain. I wish hay I could say that it gets better, and it sort of does, but it never really goes away.
I’m really sorry.
Damn that sucks I just hope that the sun will shine soon upon you with the hope of a better tomorrow.
OMNI:In the end we all die,it's a part of life what you must do is accept that and move on.Don't be sad,mourn them yes but keep smiling for them do not think about how they are gone instead fixate your attention on how they lived.And above all realize and accept that life is not fair,the world will not stop for you,so you must not stop for it.
oh iam sorry for ur loss it alway hard lose someone closet
may they rip.
I am so sorry for your loss.
...
If it helps you feel better I recently lost an uncle, far different reasons from you, but... I'm just hoping that knowing you're not the only one dealing with that type of stuff helps.