Story notes / wish list

The following is my own personal list of the most detested, bemoaned gripes and tropes I have found, and even some ways to avoid them, while reading stories here on FIMFiction. Your mileage may vary. They are things I intend to include, or avoid, while I struggle to write my own narrative.
Feel free to reference this list to your hearts content. If you plan to outright copy it elsewhere, then at the very least put a link back to here so others can read the most updated version. This list will, over time or by popular demand, be expanded and explained as necessary. Feel free to add your own in the comments.

Last updated: November 31, 2016

----- don't, it's been done to death
Don't make a joke about toilets
Don't have the character brought to Rarity for clothes
Don't have the character start the journey in Ponyville or the Everfree forest
Don't have Pinkie Pie throw the character a party
Don't have the CMC drag the character off to help find a cutiemark
Don't have Lyra faun over fingers
Don't have Fluttershy be afraid of the new animal, the human
Don't have the human character afraid of magic. Humans have always had a concept for it.
Don't have weapons more advanced than Castle-age. No guns.
Don't make changlings the villain. They've been through enough.
Don't bring up how hooves can hold things.
Don't reference MLP being a cartoon from the human world.
Don't joke about Rainbow Dash's colors.
Don't use ALL CAPS or excessive punctuation!??!!
Don't have the character be surprised that Celestia/Luna can move the Sun/Moon
Don't have the character think they're dreaming when they first wake up.
Don't have your character die to reach Equestria, or make it Discord's fault. It's been done to death (pun intended).

---- questions
Who is your target audience?
What is your unique selling proposition?
What do you want your audience to feel?
What's the call to action?
What is the end game? How is this story going to end?
What would Best Princess do?
Where is Discord / Spike / the local guards during all of this?

----- reminders
Simplify; Don't make it more complicated than is has to be
All of the mane 6 have pets
Where is Spike?
Twilight's motivating is friendship, not books or science research.
Twilight has wings now,
You can travel by walking, cart, train, chariot, and balloon/airship for everything else.
Rarity's talent is finding inner beauty, not fashion
Applejack's cutiemark represents deep family bonds
Rainbow Dash's cutiemark represents the need to go fast, her JOB is weather pony, and she's best pony
Zecora is hard to write, plan ahead!
Hugging is fine; scratching behind the ear must be asked; belly rubs, If not illegal, are probably best behind closed doors
No healing spells; that's cheating!
Try not to use ellipsis (...)
No swearing. Ever. Period.
Keep human religion away from pony.
Write the names for numbers, not the actual numbers (twelve as apposed to 12)
Avoid using human colloquialisms

----- The following are what I consider to be words and phrases to avoid using at all costs!
actually
Basically
Essentially
Literally
*sigh*
Like,
And/or
Kinda
Sorta
Nor
All you have to do
There you go
Pretty much
First, ... Second, ...
Thus
Furthermore
Speaking of which,
first thing's first
suddenly, Out of nowhere
• Nothing happens "suddenly". You just don't notice it right away and it surprises you.
Therefor
Hence

----- suggestions
•If you really need to do 'authors notes' can't you find a way to work it into the story? Update them when they become irrelevant.
•Use as many SAT words as you can.
// Example: http://www.majortests.com/sat/wordlist.php
•Keep in mind of they type of narration you're using. Don't mix first-person with third-person-omniscient unless it's absolutely necessary.