Promotions 6: The Hell, This Thing Is Still Alive! · 11:47pm Aug 21st, 2014
Holy hell, the promotions are back! Now with 20% more blunt-minireviews! To truly showcase my opinionz (which are the best there ever were, and ever could possibly be in the realm of existence) I shall now be promoting each fic with a tiny, blunt review thingy along with it. How good will this review be? It won't reveal any spoilers and just give the bare-bones minimum of criticism/praising/blazing. It won't be anything amazing, but hell, might convince you lazy good for nothing awful pretty loyal readers of mine to drop on by and give it a read. Now, to the promotions!
Me with fimfic, because it just can't get enough of my pores.
Now, before we kick off the promotion/reviewing process, time to shed some light on some other worthy and honorable reviewers who work tirelessly to shift through the shit of the site and ingest it without drinking any milk. Truly, these dedicated persons are extremely masochistic and deserve our pity, perhaps even a shoulder to cry on as the site drags down down further, piece by piece.
Poor bastards.
First we have PresentPerfect, who is like the Nick Cage of the reviewing world. He'll accept nearly everything, do a ton of it, and yet retain internet praise and infamy just for performance alone. As you can see from his most current Fic rec he's been doing this for a while, with a system and everything! And letters! By scrolling down you can spot any number of fics you've seen popping up on the site. Along with this he reviews readings, because life isn't hard enough for this impeccable reviewer of the reviewings... that reviews. Be sure to give him a watch in the blind, desperate, and borderline stalker hope he reviews your fic and gives it a score that doesn't crush your hopes and send you flying towards an ice cream tub faster than Rarity (but really, he's a sweet guy, and super duper smeeeeexy!).
Next up to the plate is RazgrizS57, 27 consecutive winner of the cutest avatar ever award. As seen in his Read It Later reviews, he goes above and beyond for an in-depth analysis of any fic that catches his eye. In fact, he also shows his emotional/mental state after reading said story and how it affected him. Sorta like the impact it left him. If you want the truthful gist of how a story can impact a reader, Raz's reviews are where it's at, so be sure to follow him up and see what pops up in a blog down the road. Also, word is he's currently on vacation, so I thought it'd be a nice surprise if he discovered a HUGE spike in his follower count once he returned. Do it. DO IT FOR THE SPONGEGUY! THE PORES DEMAND IT!
Finally, we have Prak, who also goes by Praky, Prakster, Prakingtons, Prakalongalingong, Prakly, and who can forget Prakizzle? Well, from his Review blog series (most unoriginal name for a review blog ever, am I right?) he's even blunter than I ever could be. If you want why a story is good or bad in a summary that bars no unwarranted bias, Prak is your man. Plus, he gave me a sorta good review, so ain't he just the sweetest thing? Give him a follow if you want your reviews with a bit of comedy on the side and promise for an enjoyable experience altogether.
And now, we have the other important post before we get to the reviews! InquisitorM recently made a blog post called We interrupt your regular programming for the following announcement: which focuses on help for the people in the fandom. Help desperately needed in the form of support for those who are new and could use a good friend or compadre they can depend on to motivate them. I can certainly say this site and the friends I made on it have helped me along the road with my own problems and difficulties, so his message really hits home about something each of us can pitch in to help those with less. Oh, and an important expert that I'm sure you all will try your best to fulfill from the blog post.
I want to see a list of advertisements for places an aspiring author can go to get some safe, friendly help; I don't want to see any other comments on this post. If, together, we can find even one or two people who needed help, whether it's pure writing or just somewhere to hang out, it'll be worth it.
And now, to the promotions... reviews... promoviews... revotions... ah, fuck it, I'll just call it the Bob's Promo-Viewer!
Not very long ago, Celestia, Luna, and the Elements of Harmony simply vanished. With nopony to control the sun and the moon, as well as friendship faltering, Equestria falls apart. In an isolated community fortunate enough to have sustained food and safety, a young mare known as Jadeleaf follows her curiosity to the far reaches of a damaged kingdom to find the truth and, with any luck, undo the damage caused by the mysterious disappearances.
This definitely isn't your run of the mill OC story, I can tell you that much. While kind of slow to introducing the characters and story near the beginning, the author certainly picks it up in later chapters and deals out a developed world strife with conflict and adventure that the main character, Jadeleaf, must overcome. You'll certainly be in for a treat if adventure stories are your go-to enjoyment, but it is even appealing to those who enjoy well developed OC's and a captivating plot that keeps you on the edge of your seat. Unfortunately, the story doesn't have much support or comments for that matter. At nearly 15,000 words it only has two comments and less than 10 likes. Now, I'm sure many of you know the hardships of spreading your name on the site or getting your stories more attention, which is why I'm asking you all to give the story a chance and see if it's as enjoyable for you as it was for me.
Princess Cadance and Prince-Consort Shining Armor have only just settled into their new life as the rulers of the fabled Crystal Empire when Shining is kidnapped by a mysterious mare while guarding the Crystal Heart. Cadance awakes the next morning to find her husband missing and the Heart dark and powerless.
She will have to make her way through ancient traps and mysteries to rescue her husband. Meanwhile, Shining must find a path out of the twists and turns of another's mind and back into his own. But if Cadance cannot find her husband and restore the Heart, not only does the Empire risk instability and collapse, but she will lose the one thing that she prizes above all else: Shining Armor's love.
Right off the bat I'm in love. Cadance being awesome, suspense drenched in every chapter just leaving you begging for the next, and best of all, it's a romance adventure! You know how hard it is to find those things on this site? Plus, compelling mystery of just what the hell is around the next corner plotwise will have you wanting to know which cliffhanger or surprise the author will throw at you next! My only real complaint, since I gotta throw a low-ball sometimes just to keep things fair, is that the story could be moving faster in terms of pacing, though that's more my personal preference than anything else. If you like Awesomesauce Cadance, then this story is definitely for you!
What should be done about Discord?
Fluttershy knows that’s the question that Princess Luna and Princess Celestia will be asking during their meeting about “the breezies” in the most secure room in all of Equestria.
Could she ever forgive herself if she condemned one of her friends to be imprisoned in stone for a thousand years? But if the fate of Equestria really is on the line, could she ever forgive herself if she doesn’t?
This, right here, is the best damn story using Fluttershy. Eveeeeeeeer. And this is coming from a guy who prefers not to write her, or even read fics about her. The author managed to write Fluttershy in the most believable way I've ever seen, and used her voice wonderfully to boot. Not to mention the story itself in one heck of a doozy to go through, leaving you feeling satisfied most definitely once it's all over and complete. If you're up for a dialogue driven story with some of the best damn character interaction out there, this fic is certainly up your alley. Main complaint for myself would be that the story felt bogged down at certain parts when it felt like it should be moving quicker, though these are few in number and doesn't majorly impact the reading experience.
Okay, done with this set! Tell me how you liked it! Also, might be doing featured box reviews, where I get extremely blasted and then give my impression and opinionz (which are still the best there is) on them in turn. Oh god, my liver isn't going to make it to winter!
I'll give these a try. I'm trusting you Rainbowbob.
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You
poor bastardgentleman of genius intellect!2389454
Meh, taking orders from a talking sponge. What have I become?
Dammit, RB, why the hell are you adding more crap to my RiL? Don't you know my list is too long as it is?
I'm never gonna catch up with my reading at this rate.
Thank you Bob. I'm really glad you liked that story. It is always incredibly flattering to hear that you made someone like a character who they ordinarily don't care for very much. Means you've done something right.
Or slipped mind control drugs into their food again.
I shall have to check out the other two stories. They have shockingly few views.
SHOCKINGLY I say.
Other reviewers you should check out, who I can't link to because I'm on my phone: Soge, Chris (on his "One Man's Pony Ramblings" blog), John Perry, and Singularity Dreams (on his "City of Doors" blog, where he also keeps track of ALL the other pony reviewers!)
Dreamcatcher is on hiatus tho
You make my kokoro go doki-doki.
Also I had no idea Prak did reviews. :O You learned me a thing, woot!
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THAT IS WHY I'M HOPING IT WON'T BE SOON!
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Senpai noticed me!
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Go and give it a read and leave a comment. I'm sure that'll get her motivated again.
(The author is a friend of mine.)
2390089 Done and done.