Fic recs, August 11th · 7:36pm Aug 11th, 2014
Once again, the writeoff is starting back up! We're in prompt suggestion phase through Thursday, so get those prompts in! And remember, you can always sign up at the site to get updates so you don't need me to remind you. :B
Also, I'm planning on finishing Hope today, and will post the vs. review later. After that, my next versus story will be On a Cross and Arrow, because it's next in my audiobooks! :D I'm looking forward to it. So to that end, I decided to just sit down and clear out everything before it. More recs today, yay!
H: 0 R: 1 C: 3 V: 2 N: 3
Too Shy for a Rainbow by SamRose
Reading (part 1) by Indubitably Ponified
Genre: Romance
Fluttershy has long had a crush on Rainbow Dash and finally, with help from some friends, is ready to tell her. I wish this story was a little better, because it’s almost exactly what I look for in shipfics and I want to hold it up to non-shippers as "how you do it right”. While I can’t really fault the romance, the story’s age really shows through in the writing. POV slides around continually, close word and phrase repetition draw attention to the limited vocabulary, and some of the side characters, Rarity in particular, are a little overwritten. There’s a bit of drama too, when Fluttershy’s “big night” for her and Rainbow goes wrong. This does have a lot going for it, however. The story is told in paired scenes of flashbacks to Fluttershy and Rainbow’s childhood in Cloudsdale followed by their actions in the modern time. (A sub-plot about young Fluttershy having a secret admirer is left unresolved, or else I missed what it was getting at.) Fluttershy seeks Rarity’s help when her own efforts fall short. Most importantly, when Fluttershy finally tells Rainbow, Rainbow reacts entirely within her character (i.e., doesn’t immediately fall in love), giving her a chance because they’re such good friends. The epilogue, while containing the worst of the close repetition and even telling, rounds out the story well with some relationship planning. People don’t write romance like this in this fandom, and I wish they did more. I also wish they wrote more Flutterdash, because it’s one of those ships that seems to have fallen by the wayside. (Side note: This was written by the guy who wrote Silent Ponyville and supposedly takes place a month after that story. I don’t remember SP all that well, but I also don’t see how the two are related, so don’t let that scare you off.)
Recommended If You’re Interested In Romance
Caramel’s Entrapment by zulu
Reading by Dr. Cobra
Mature: Sex
Genre: Femdom/Humiliation
Caramel knocks over some mannequins at Carousel Boutique, and Rarity (hilariously calling Sweetie Belle’s name upon hearing the noise) sets about punishing him for it. Pinkie Pie shows up later. On the one hand, this is a really funny clopfic if you take it in the broader context of clopfics, with Caramel being something of the Ponyville bicycle. If you keep that in mind, it’s amusing. If you don’t, it’s either squicky or infuriating. The fact is, number one, I can’t believe that Rarity would start molesting a stallion she knows has a girlfriend. To say she’s out of character in this story is overselling it; she's not Rarity at all. Number two, I can’t get over the fact that this is a story about Rarity raping and humiliating Caramel. Yes, luckily enough he likes what she does to him, but the fact is he didn’t know he would like it to begin with, and consent was neither asked for nor given. If you know anything about actual dom/sub relationships, stay far, far away from this story. The only reason anyone would want to read it would be if they read Fifty Shades of Grey and wished they were Bella Swan or whatever the fuck she was called in that fic.
Not Recommended
Burn Stuff by alexmagnet
Genre: Crackfic
So alexmagnet and RainbowBob both wrote stories about Twilight setting things on fire as some kind of weird competition. Both have been in the featured box, but of course we know how good a judge of quality that is. So I will attempt to sort out which is better and why. This is set in one of those Equestrias where everyone is a complete asshole. Comparisons to Three Apples shot through my mind as I was reading. (Also, it takes place shortly after the show pilot.) The main joke is predicated on Celestia being somewhat careless, at least in regard to knowing the abilities of her staff, so make of that what you will. Twilight and Spike are massive jerks to each other. And honestly, I found it funny, though I know it’s not going to appeal to everyone. Admittedly, I like the idea that the Everfree can be cut back via controlled burns, so this gets points for a good concept.
Recommended If You Like OOC Humor
Marenheit 451 by RainbowBob
Genre: Also a Crackfic
Okay, I guess “Twilight burning things” is not really an idea that can be approached seriously. Much of what can be said about the previous story applies to this one as well, but this story wins for including the line “Her tears fell like the maple residue on the broken plate.” No, honestly I feel it’s the better story, though I did laugh more at the first one, so I guess the final verdict is “each sucks in its own special way”. Otherwise, the same caveats apply.
Also Recommended If You Like OOC Humor
Celestia vs. the Talking Sandwich by Bluebell_Teh_Unicorn
Reading by Smilin’ Sammy
Genre: Still a Crackfic
It just seems to be one of those days. If you can believe that Celestia doesn’t know how to make a sandwich, how to make bread, or how to read, you may find this story funny. The ending, however, is kind of a letdown, like the author ran out of steam. There are also a few minor jokes sprinkled throughout the story that don’t really add anything. So while this is funny in theory, it doesn’t quite work. You’d be better off reading either of the two stories previous, if you need a crackfic fix.
Vaguely Recommended
Let Me Complain, Dear by Oroboro
Reading by TheLostNarrator, Emogak and Goombasa
Genre: Romance
Rarity and Applejack celebrate their anniversary with a camping trip — Rarity got to pick last year — and of course things go horribly wrong. This story is a great example of how to do “the story already happened”, and it’s got excellent economy of words. We get just the tail end of what has to be a terribly memorable trip, and precisely enough information to fill everything in. Of course, center stage in this piece is Rarity being awesome, dragging Applejack along on a sledge after she breaks her leg. As for the question of whether the shipping was necessary, I dunno. I mean, Rarity likely would have helped AJ out if they were just friends, but this would have a much different feeling to it. The idea of love (and complaining) keeping her going makes her a bit more heroic, if you ask me. I think this will satisfy regardless of opinions on shipping.
Recommended
Ghost Stories by ChainReaction
Reading by Emogak and TheLostNarrator
Genre: Ghost Stories
Twilight, Applejack and Rarity have another sleepover, the power goes out (though it’s never explained how it was on to begin with) and they decide to tell ghost stories again. This piece is very poorly written: there’s an overreliance on telling and adverbs, everyone’s out of character, and awkward word choices like “spoke” for "said" make me think there might be some first language issues. It’s the characters that really sink this, though. Rarity and Applejack both tell stories of sexual debauchery, and Rarity at least would never be so indelicate. (Why would she make up a story about the ghost of a vengeful pedophile anyway?) It’s unfortunate, because Twilight’s story actually works pretty well, even if it’s hard to believe her claim that it actually happened. Still, it’s not worth struggling through the poor characterization to make it to what’s essentially a jump scare.
Not Recommended
Wrapping Paper by psp7master
Reading by Scribbler, et. al.
Genre: Slice of Life
In the wake of her shop closing down, Bon-Bon, an avid storyteller as well as a confectioner, goes out for one last round of storytelling. But her final day in Ponyville is complicated by the arrival of a certain green unicorn. I honestly don’t know what to make of this. I thought it was going to tell the story of how Lyra and Bon-Bon met and got together, but it doesn’t go that far. I thought, after the first scene, that there was some kind of meta thing going on, but that line was never brought up again. Setting Bon-Bon up as a storyteller doesn’t really do anything for her character, and Lyra has no purpose. She just waltzes in, confuses the setting by having a credit card, and pretty much messes up everything Bon-Bon was planning to do with no result. I feel like I missed something, but I’m not even sure.
Vaguely Recommended
Pinkie Pie Destroys a Classic Muscle Car Just to Make a Bad Pun by AlwaysDressesInStyle
Reading by Winr100
New guy on the Doom Pie Network and I have to say, I don’t like him much. Too much commentary, not a lot of inflection in his reading (I’m not listening to this as I normally would, but I feel he’s pretty quiet as well) and a terrible Harshwhinny voice. I hope if he's around more, he gets better.
Genre: Pony Does X
Pinkie’s participating in a javelin-throwing contest at the Equestrian Games and the car in question is a Javelin: there’s the joke, and now you don’t have to read this. While listening to it, I couldn’t help but be reminded of the complaints about the ways in which authors over-describe weaponry. The same thing was going on here, only with a car. Honestly, all we needed was the name and maybe the color; the rest only served to bog everything down. Even worse, once the joke is revealed, the story just keeps going, and it doesn’t get any funnier. My time has definitely been wasted.
Not Recommended
At last, the sweet, sweet "Not Recommended" stories return. And the last story was . . . interesting, to say the least. I remember reading it, and I laughed, but I laughed mainly at the stupidity of it all.
Also, On a Cross and Arrow! I'm looking forward to this post. I loved that story when I read it way back when it was on Google Docs.
2361734
It looks like a hefty audiobook, so don't expect it for a while.
RIP Alex
2361742
I'll see how long I can hold my breath.
Oh, On a Cross and Arrow. I remember somewhat enjoying the read, until the Rarity part.
I think it was very, eh, fanfic-ish, because of a combination of absurd premise, numerous problems with the writing, and generally being somewhat amateurish, but enjoyable in spite all of that.
Which reminds me, I really need to go leave a comment on it...
> picks Bob's fic
> Bob's doesn't make a Code Lyoko reference
> obviously biased, probably payed off
> hack reviewer
0/10 would still read future reviews
2361761
SUCK IT BITCH!
WINNER WINNER CHICKEN DINNER!
Let Me Complain, Dear by Oroboro — As a person who likes to complain, I'll need to read this one.
Caramel’s Entrapment by zulu — As a person who's actually familiar with dom/sub and written a bit of it (not that I've gotten around to posting it, of course...), this sounds like it would probably infuriate me. I've had that from a R63 TwiDash fic once already.
But this line was hilarious:
I was about to complain that you'd never reviewed any of my awesome stories, and then noticed the large number of them in this blog which you marked "not recommended."
Now I can't decide if I should feel snubbed, or feel like I dodged a bullet.
2361761
wtf is Code Lyoko
2362105
Actual BDSM scares me, but I've read enough about how it should work, mostly thanks to 50SoG, that I can get angry about misrepresentation.
2362232
If it makes you feel any better, I reviewed your peachfic and didn't recommend it. :V
2362605
Really? How did I miss that?
2362616
Prolly cuz you weren't watching me at the time.
It's good that you're listening to On a Cross and Arrow instead of reading. Many of the grammar mistakes don't make it through the conversion.
The writing is atrocious. The concept and execution are ponified crack. It balances out.
2362649
Well, it wasn't on your long list of reviews, and I don't blame you. Certainly not one of my better works. Now if you were to read Scootaloo and Celestia: Adventures in Twilight's Gall Bladder, you'd see a true masterpiece. Or even better, watch the video.
2362605
24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m6kfr9Xekm1rnp5t8o1_400.gif
i11.photobucket.com/albums/a198/EvilZombi/6feaad63.png
img2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20100413045427/codelyoko/images/7/7b/Sad_Milly.gif
On a Cross and Arrow has the dubious honor of being the oldest fic in my "read-it-later" list – over two years now.
2362682
Thanks for the heads-up. I'll have to make sure I actually look at it a bit before I write it up.
2363146
Mine is The Final Quest of Star-Swirl the Bearded, if Fimfic's metrics can be trusted. Of course, I don't think that's older than Dangerous Business, so that could be it too.
As a small note, Present, one of my best friends is an ex-dominatrix. She only gave it up because she wound up having three kids. She's very, very unassuming. Then you piss her off and she becomes the epitome of Mama Bear.
If you ever have any interest in BDSM as a culture, or have questions (even if it's just "wtf did I just read?!"), I can point you her way.
2371805
No, I try to stay as far away from it as possible. :B
2372237
Fair 'nuff.