Fic Reviews III · 5:40am May 25th, 2014
Haven’t done one of these in a while. Oh well, here’s all the things I was reading at work and a few other stray fics aside from those.
Scootaloo Dies a Bunch
by alexmagnet
This started out as a pretty good parody of Scootabuse stories, and for a while, it remained pretty creative in all of the different ways Scootaloo dies. But about a month in, the story was really stretching for some of its gags, and by now, two months after it was first published, it’s more about total randomness than actually maintaining that running gag.
A pretty simple one-shot gag fic with a pretty simple one-note gag. It’s funny enough, though not my type of humor, and honestly disappointed me a bit. I was more interested in the chemistry developing between Twilight and Silver Stomp, but that’s kind of the point—to get you invested and then drop the reveal on you. Appropriate, considering the subject matter.
A Cadance/Angel Bunny crack ship fic? Blame Tidal, he started it.
Anyway, the fic does as good a job justifying the crack ship as could be expected, but unfortunately, might play the entire thing a bit too seriously. Cadance fretting over the consequences came across as an honest concern most of the time, and it ended on a half-hearted “we’ll work this out” conversation rather than what I’d honestly expected—Shining Armor laughing his ass off at what his wife has gotten herself into.
Spike discovers that Twilight is actually his mother, and he’s a few years younger than he’d been lead to believe. This isn’t a scenario I can honestly buy happening within canon, but Rocinante does make it convincing and believable when taken by itself. While it doesn’t exactly mesh well with their prior relationship on the show, the emotions play out right, and it makes for a good scene.
Fluttershy’s Sick Day
by Zero_Starlight
A short and rather sweet humanOCxFluttershy fic. It’s not the most well-written out there, but it’s hardly an example of the type of stories that make human/Mane Six ships generally questioned if not outright hated. There’s not really anything to dislike here (unless you happen to seriously dislike the concept), but there’s not really anything that merits attention, either.
Here’s one that was in my Read Later for ages. Coco Pommel is being hunted by a changeling. This is a really solid Dark story, and the predatory tone works very well—not just in the literal sense of a predatory animal (as the changeling is), but also in giving the impression that he’s a sexual predator. And I know that could also be taken literally, but you know what I mean.
Medical Emergency (3/30/2015 — Story Deleted)
by RainbowBob
Twilight/Redheart clop, driven by irresponsible magic use on Twilight’s part, as many problems are. I have no problems with this one, beyond Redheart being kind of a bitch (and I know people in nursing and know it can do that to you) and apparently nopony in town actually knowing Twilight (but the show does that, too).
Also it’s anthro, so if you’re one of those people who consider that an abomination against all that is good, you might pass this up. Or not, since it’s still a good fic.
An exploration of one of the standard difficulties of living forever—outliving everyone else. Celestia and Luna discuss past loves, bring up bittersweet memories, and generally have a cute sisterly moment. The writing can be very telly, and the third-person omniscient viewpoint keeps up from really connecting with either of the sisters, but beyond those points it’s still a decent fic.
Princess Celestia Bursts Into Flames
by GemstoneTheUnicorn
Not a bad story, per se. After all, I found it in the Popular Box. But it’s extremely random, far too much so for my tastes. If randomness, absurdity, and “Lesson Zero”-style Twilight breakdowns are good for you, it merits a look.
The good: a rarity in that it’s a romance story where things don’t necessarily work out perfectly, and all of the characters’ emotions play well. The bad: Twilestia shipping is wrapped up in a Momlestia package and that’s a bit creepy. It doesn’t actually portray Celestia as Twilight’s mother, but they definitely have that sort of relationship. And Celestia wants to make it a romantic and sexual one. If you can get over that part, the rest of it is pretty good.
A stallion awakes to discover he is now a mare. Not a bad plot, particularly when the victim is Shining Armor, because for some reason I think it’s funny when he suffers. I don’t even hate him or anything—I just love him being the buttmonkey of the story. Unfortunately, the story is plagued by terrible pacing. The humor is never really given the time to play out, and scenes which could have easily lasted a thousand words on their own are done in a paragraph or two. There’s a good example right off the bat—Cadance finds out in the sixth paragraph.
Add that it’s very telly, has a drifting POV, and everypony is generally out of character (I can’t accept Cadance immediately assuming Shining is cheating on her, nor calling anypony a slut), and you have a great concept with a failed execution.
I was going to do more, but we’ve gone long enough without one of these already.
Also I’m still working on TBTK Chapter 3. I’m just not very happy with how it’s turning out, but I want to get past it and get on board the roller coaster that will be chapters 5 through 12.
Love Bunny!! :
I still can't believe I asked for that. So awesome!
I wrote the thing, and even I'm disappointed with it.
Thanks for this — but if you review one of my stories again, I'd appreciate a PM informing me about it.
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I can do that, but I've had others suggest to me that I post these reviews (or notice of them) in the comments of the fics in question as well as my blog, and that might serve much the same purpose. If you'd still prefer a PM, though, I wouldn't mind. But these random reviews just come from whatever I grab out of my RIL, so who knows when I'll do something of yours again.